‘I worked so hard to get to this point’: Why Carlos Carrasco wants to pitch

There were days this spring when Carlos Carrasco felt as if he had “retired from baseball.” After all, he had never enjoyed Mother’s Day and Father’s Day at home with his wife and five children. There has always been a game to win, a team charter to catch.

Those holidays, foreign as they may have seemed, didn’t reflect reality. With the baseball season on hiatus, Carrasco kept pitching. And lifting weights. And running.

He converted his garage and driveway into Tampa’s finest pop-up training center. He built a mound beside the front door of his home. He’d stand tall, start his delivery and fire a fastball toward the catcher, his neighbor, who plays in college. That worked much better than his early-spring attempts at pitching in the street or on his lawn.

“If you know Cookie,” said teammate Tyler Naquin, “within five minutes, you know that’s something that he would do.”

All along, as COVID-19 threatened — and still casts doubt upon — the 2020 season, Carrasco has never wavered: He plans to pitch.

Carrasco simulated a six-inning start in Florida on Sunday before he traveled back to Cleveland. Friday morning at Progressive Field, he visited the bullpen for a side session.

“Right now,” Carrasco said, “I’m ready to go.”

Naquin said the team would respect any decision Carrasco made about his 2020 participation. Other players across the league have opted out, and Carrasco is considered “high-risk.” He was diagnosed with chronic myeloid leukemia 13 months ago.

“I’m glad he’s being part of this,” said Indians manager Terry Francona. “He certainly would have had our blessing had he not wanted to participate, but it’s nice to see him.”

Last summer took a physical, mental and emotional toll as Carrasco charted a course back to the mound, his comfort zone. He lost weight. He couldn’t muster the energy to complete throws to his catcher. He watched from afar as his teammates navigated their way through the season’s grueling schedule. But the idea of returning to the mound kept him motivated.

Before he returned to Cleveland this week, Carrasco conversed with doctors and the Indians’ medical staff. The team will take extra precautions to ensure his safety beyond the basic protocols outlined in the league’s 110-page operations manual. Carrasco is expected to have his own locker space, separate from the home clubhouse, for instance. Teams are also required to submit their own codes of conduct to the league and the players’ association; Indians players, coaches and front office members are collaborating on the club’s version.

“My teammates understand what’s gone on with me,” Carrasco said. “They just want to be careful, try to do everything by the rules. Everyone is just so happy to see me here with the team.

“It’s completely different, but we will get through this.”

When he wrapped up his side session on Friday, Carrasco changed out of his uniform and into his regular attire, including his patented backwards hat. He also wore a face mask designed with the Cleveland skyline, the ballpark lights standing tall on one end.

“Whenever we’re talking about Cookie,” said fellow pitcher Shane Bieber, “it’s always about what a bright spot in the clubhouse he is and his personality.

“You can still see his smile, even behind a face mask. He’s the man. We all appreciate him, embrace him. And we’re excited for him to get going this season. I’m sure he’s antsy as well.”

That’s an understatement. Carrasco became emotional one afternoon in early March when he rejoined the Indians’ rotation for the first time in nine months. He had a reminder on his left hand, as etched into the webbing of his red glove was a depiction of him celebrating his final appearance in Cleveland in 2019. He relieved Adam Plutko, escaped a jam by inducing a double play and shouted and pumped his fists. He now carries that memory with him every time he takes the mound. He was later named baseball’s Comeback Player of the Year.

Carrasco made his triumphant return from a three-month leukemia absence in September. He pitched out of the bullpen, but the rotation is where he feels he belongs, where he feels a sense of normalcy. And just as he was building toward that familiar feeling in the spring, his elbow started barking. And then the pandemic arrived and shuttered spring training.

So, the four-month hiatus has only increased his anticipation for the season. The next chapter in Carrasco’s inspiring story, he hopes, will place him on the mound, where he’ll toss the first pitch of a game in a few weeks.

“A year ago, I was giving the news to my teammates and everyone,” Carrasco said. “But right now, I feel so happy that I fought through this because I love to play baseball. I had some ups and downs, but I was really strong through everything. …

“I worked so hard to get to this point right here. I feel fine. I just want to get back to the mound and start pitching.”

(Photo: Jason Miller / Getty Images)