Giants outfielder Darin Ruf is supposed to be in rehab mode. He strained his hamstring on May 26 and is working his way back from the injured list. The last month has been rinse and repeat: go to Oracle Park, get treatment, work out, gradually increase the intensity.
But there’s a bright side: more time to be a dad. That is not something to take for granted. Not after last year’s 60-game season in a quarantine bubble, when Ruf went three months without seeing his wife, Libby, their son, Henry, and their newborn daughter, Olive.
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Then two weeks ago, the tables turned. The patient became the caretaker. Libby Ruf required an emergency appendectomy. Her mother flew from Omaha, Neb., to San Francisco to help with the kids.
“But I left pretty much everything to Darin,” Libby said. “It’s amazing. He can do everything. I used to put Olive to bed and now she wants Daddy. He’ll put her to bed. He changes diapers. It’s really sweet when she first wakes up. He loves that moment of being able to get her out of her crib and hold her.
“It’s really sweet how the kids love him and run to him. He’s just really loving with the kids.”
Darin Ruf and Libby Schuring were high school sweethearts at Westside High in Omaha who stayed together despite four years of dating long distance — she was the state tennis champion who went to the University of Kansas, he stayed home and played baseball at Creighton — followed by three more years of frequent separation when Darin was playing in the Phillies’ minor-league system. Libby couldn’t quit her job in corporate communications for TD Ameritrade to join him. She was the one paying the bills.
They agreed from the start: they would view his baseball career, for however long it lasted, as an adventure for both of them. Darin wasn’t drafted as a junior despite slugging his way onto every page of Creighton’s record book. He was a 20th-round pick as a senior with no leverage and no prospect pedigree.
“The numbers were against me to make it as far as I have and to have the career I’ve had,” Darin said. “I was honest and realistic with myself from the beginning. I said, ‘As I keep moving up and keep playing well, I’ll stick with it.'”
That was more than a decade ago. Darin is 33 and still hopes to play a few more years. The adventure has lasted longer than they expected, and it’s taken turns that neither could have imagined: winter ball stops in Venezuela and the Dominican Republic, a 38-homer season at Double-A Reading that put him on the prospect map, reaching the big leagues with the Phillies and then spending three years in South Korea after an opportunity to sign with Samsung Lions in KBO. Darin was a star in Korea, hitting 86 home runs over three seasons and could have returned for a fourth. But career decisions are family decisions, Libby was expecting in 2020, and Darin wanted to be home when Olive was born. So he signed a minor-league contract with the Giants. When Olive arrived in late March, it was two weeks after the COVID-19 pandemic wiped out spring training. Everyone was home.
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That’s the way it’s always been for the Rufs throughout this baseball adventure: a life of curveballs on and off the field, and a determination to make the best of things.
Henry might be the most determined of them all.
Henry was 16 months old when he and Libby joined Darin in Daegu, South Korea, first in a suburban apartment building and in a more central location the following year. They were resolved to say yes to every new experience and expose Henry to as much of the culture and customs as they could. He attended a Korean-language preschool. He made friends. He wore ceremonial costumes on national holidays. He threw out a ceremonial first pitch at a Lions game. He didn’t cry or protest when elderly women in the park, caught up in the novelty of seeing an American child with blond hair, would squeeze his cheeks or pick him up.
“And he’d only eat Korean food,” Libby said. “It was to the point where I’d send a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with him on a field trip and they’d tell me, ‘Oh, Henry didn’t eat his lunch. He ate his friend’s gimbap.’ It’s like sushi but with Spam and eggs instead of raw fish.
“It’s funny because he’s a picky eater, but only with American food. He didn’t want chicken fingers or a cheeseburger. He would eat like, soybean soup, gimbap, dried fish. Anything they gave him, he’d eat it and ask for more. He still loves any Asian food now. It’s stuck with him.
“I just said literally last week to Darin that I missed Korea because it was one of the best experiences we’ve had. I think the reason our experience was so great was because our son had such a good time. It was fun to see everything through his eyes.”
They are seeing San Francisco through Henry’s eyes, too. It is not the easiest thing to explain homelessness to a 5-year-old. When they arrived in the city, they did a lot of exploring and checked out all the parks and open spaces. The questions followed. Why are there so many tents? Why are these people sleeping on the sidewalk? Can we help them?
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“He would see homeless people with a cup out and he’d say, ‘Mom, can I give them some money?'” Libby said. “We’d give him some change, and then we’d come to the next person and he’d ask for more. I love that he wanted to help every person he saw. But I thought about it: this isn’t the best way for him to understand what’s going on, to hand someone some money and keep walking.”
That’s when the idea started: making brown bag lunches. They would do it together as a family project. Libby bought the supplies: bread for PB&Js, granola bars, crackers, bottled water, Henry’s favorite brand of lollipop. Henry’s job was to decorate the bags with stickers, magic markers and positive messages (including “Go Giants”), then assemble the lunches.
Distribution was also Henry’s job. He might not have a red cape like Austin Perine, the 7-year-old homeless ambassador from Alabama whose positive spirit and “Show Love” motto turned him into a national celebrity. But his interactions were just as heartwarming. Emotional nourishment is important, too.
“I don’t know if he fully understands what someone goes through when they don’t get to have a meal every day,” Libby said. “I don’t know if I can understand it, to be perfectly honest. There are times when I think he feels sad and times he feels scared and I sort of feel the same way. But he enjoys seeing them enjoy it. He loves putting (the lunches) together and he loves delivering them and he knows he’s doing something to help.”
“That’s the goal as a parent,” Darin said. “Teach your kid how to be a good person, first and foremost. And she is unbelievable at that.”
The Rufs had Father’s Day all planned out: Henry put together a game in which he’ll try to guess all of his dad’s favorite things. (Hint: for favorite food, guess sushi.) They would go out to dinner to celebrate. (Again, bet on sushi.) Then came one more curveball. The Giants are sending Darin on a minor-league rehab assignment. So the family will spend the weekend in Sacramento, where it was 104 degrees at first pitch Friday night.
“The kids won’t know what to do with the heat!” Libby said.
They’ll make the best of it. The adventure isn’t over yet.
(Photos courtesy of the Ruf family)
