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Captain Jack PUA Notes
Captain Jack PUA Notes
. The differences in how women view sex are less a function of male/female differences and more a function of the ease with which a female can get sex. Males who have roughly the same level of sexual opportunity tend to treat sex more like a female does. If a woman is at an attraction location then she wants to have sex and she wants to have it with a NEW guy that night. If a woman didn't want sex she could spend her time doing a million other things. If she wanted sex but NOT with a new male all she has to do is answer her phone. There are dozens of men calling and trying to take her to a nice dinner, a play, a movie or even to attraction locations. Seduction is primarily attaching her raging sexual desire to you specifically. Everyone is out and looking for approval With the proper frames a female will do almost anything sexually. The Efficiency Principle - The PUA does the minimum necessary to advance the courtship. o Baby Stepping - The Efficiency Principle applied to maneuvering the HB to the Sex Location (aka Logistics Management). You guide her along with small, seemingly innocuous steps that she is unlikely to say no to. "Can you give me a ride to my car? I parked for away." Then, when you get there "Wow, I'm kind of tipsy. Can you drop me of at my place? It's not far. Take a right out of the parking lot." In your parking lot, "Come in for a minute. But you can't stay long, I have to be up early." etc. I literally ignore anything/everything that doesn't serve me. o Power of Ignoring: The power of ignoring is truly awesome. I literally ignore anything/everything that doesn't serve me. I've completely given up trying to come up with witty/clever/smooth comebacks for things girls say or do that I don't like. Instead, I completely ignore it. The principle here is what I've called "Magnification." When you talk about something you are magnifying it... if you don't want it then ignore it. Also, I never try to break Frames anymore because whatever you give attention to gets stronger. By trying to argue out of it or maneuver out of it you are making it more REAL because you are building up the REFERENCES around it. This gives comparison/contrast points, boundaries, thus making it more concrete. CJ's First Rule of Pick-up: "Ignore anything that doesn't advance the seduction." Discretion: Discretion is a key, underutilized and rarely talked about Frame but it
is truly powerful. In my version of Rings on Fingers I talk about keeping secrets. That night another of Sinn's sets the obstacle was really, really hot... she was just my type Brunnette, nice eyes, beautiful ass, great smile and great perfectly straight white teeth... I didn't say more than about 15 sentences to her but one of them was: "I don't kiss and tell..." It had a profound impact on her. She number closed me at closing time. She texted me about 2:30ish Hottie: "I'm horny" CJ: "Be there in a minute." Hottie: "You don't know where I live" CJ: "text me directions" Captain Jack's Beliefs Women are: 1. Sexual Creatures 2. Adventurous 3. Curious 4. Wonderful, exciting, interesting beings 5. Nurturing (and I could go on and on: Cute, Beautiful, Delicate, Soft, etc, etc)
This is part one of my audaciously titled series: "The Seven Laws of PUA". These seven "laws" are what I've come to see as inescapable truths of picking up women. They are as inevitable as they are necessary to mastering our chosen art. I. Rejection: He who gets rejected, gets laid There's an elephant in the room of the PUA community. Very few guys talk about it, yet everybody experiences it... A LOT. It's rejection. And for a subject so largely ignored, your success hinges on few things more than how well you deal with it. I'm about to say something you don't want to hear. It's anathema to everything we stand for and hold dear. But pick up really boils down to a numbers game. Yeah, I said it. And it's true. The only sure-fire way to succeed and get laid often is by approaching an ASSLOAD of sets. Those awesome routines you memorized? They might take you from 1% success to 3%. That cool new haircut? From 3% to 4%. New wardrobe? Makeover? look like a goddamn rock star? From 4% to 5%. Even the most weathered veterans and gurus bat a meager 10-20%. And if you account for pre-selection (more on that below), and difficulty of venues, you're looking at more like 7-8% against the most high value women. (Note: these are all just estimates based on what some guys have posted in the past. No, I don't have references. This isn't a goddamn thesis.) Think about it for a second. What else in this world can you be considered not just good, but GREAT at for failing nine times out of ten? If you missed 90% of your shots in basketball, no one would let you near a court. If you failed 90% of your exams in school, you wouldn't make it a semester. Those rejections add up fast. They take a hefty toll on everyone's self-esteem. This is a brutal sport we're engaging in -- only the strongest can weather the storm of consistent rejection and keep on trying. It's sexual selection, which literally translates to survival of the fittest. Can you handle that night when three straight sets blow you out HARD? Are you able to not take it personally? What about going home four nights in a row without a single number? These are the things newbies have to look forward to but nobody tells them about. This shit is HARD. It will take your ego and beat it into the fucking ground night after night with no apologies. It's the guys -- no, men -- who can stand up to that abuse and keep trying that end up succeeding. Why? Because they're sexually selected. They have the tenacity, flexibility and pure drive to break through, and these are the men that women are inevitably attracted to. A lair leader in a large city told me once that over 90% of the guys who joined were gone within six months. Of that minority who stay, only a small handful ever truly
get good. Nobody tells you this when you find the community. In the end, your success will come down to how well you weather rejection. If you can't handle it, you'll find a reason to quit, you'll create limiting beliefs that will bar you from any real progress, and you'll become a keyboard jockey. (Note: If you have more posts on any single PUA forum than you have opened sets in your entire life, you are a keyboard jockey. Just had to get that out.) But the most common way guys slink away from rejection lies in something called pre-selection. I do it. You do it. Everyone who I've ever met in the community does it to some extent. It's where you pick your targets from afar. This is where retarded claims like "I can go five for five" come from (lame marketing ploys, by the way). Guys wait and see which girls give them eye contact first. Or they'll dress like Marilyn Manson and stand in a goth club until they're opened. Or they'll wait around for a lone wolf or an easy two-set. They'll go for the drunk HB6's instead of the HB10 with three guys standing around her. Why? Because it's easier. We're ALL guilty of this. And it stems from the same cause: fear of rejection. How are we to improve without thrusting ourselves in front of the screeching headlights of rejection? Subjecting ourselves to these painful possibilities is what ultimately forces us to grow. This is what us more experienced guys are naive to. We get comfortable in our old habits. HB8 SNL's are like clockwork to us, so we do little more than show up and collect our reward (once again, I'm guilty party numero uno here). So why not try that HB10 with three guys around her? Or try that posh club with deafening house music and a $40 cover instead of the same hometown bar you've been wrecking for months? Push yourself. Throw yourself to rejection and learn to love the pain. Studies have shown that being rejected by another human being activates the exact same neurons in our brains as physical pain does. You go to the gym because it's good for you. No pain, no gain, right? Condition yourself to love psychological pain. Tear your own ego to shreds. It's the only path to progress.
My new method of blending qualification and attraction takes 4 phases. 1. Framing: Here we will frame her into behaving the way we want her to. For example, the reason that we no longer call girls powderpuff girls is because calling a girl a powderpuff girls causes her to act more ADD and like a powder puff girl. instead we want to tell a girl she is classy, and intelligent. That way she will act more classy and intelligent. We can also frame girls as sexual etc.. using something like Captain Jack's version of the Strawberry Fields. The basic idea of framing is that through telling a girl how she is, she will then act accordingly. 2. Qualifying her for being the way you have framed her to be. Here's where after telling a girl i met in Sydney a few days ago that she was very independent and did whatever she wanted to do regardless of what others thought of it. I then tell her that I like that and it's rare to have that quality at her age(19). We want to qualify the girl for being these qualities so that she gets rewarded for being independent, sexual, etc... 3. Prepping: Prepping is an idea I got from Future to make sure that you keep things in the right frame. The idea is that you let her know that you are trying to get in her pants or will be trying to kiss her, bounce her etc... 4. Finally you need to release as needed. Especially after you build the emotional tension of giving her huge IOIS for the way you have framed her as being. This has been responsible for 2 lays in the last week. As well as three pulls by CJ.
One Night Stand game: One night stand game relies on early sexual framing, introduction of a jealousy thread and seeding the bounce. Logistics also become more important though not a make or break situation. Prepping: How can we prep girls to be ready for our sexual advances and our escalations without triggering ASD? Jokes- Sexual Jokes can start prepping a girl to get ready for our advances.But these jokes need to be focused more on the two of us getting together for sex rather than just being purely sexual. Stuff like Nick's telling girls he's going to fuck them in the ass when they are getting bratty. Actual preps like "I'm trying so hard not kiss you right now" or I'm trying to get in your pants following a compliment or a neg. Seeding bounces and time bridges are another way of prepping, except they prep for
dates or at least second venues rather than pulling straight to the seduction location. Sensual preps like I miss the way you smell can work over the phone. " I really want to" preps can also work to a degree as long as you stay away from overly vulgar and sexual ones like I really want to fuck you in the ass. Something along the lines of I really want to hold you or be naked with you is good. Where else can we prep? We can prep private conversations, bounces, dates and getting back to your place by overselling. Having something to show her that you sell as the second coming of god. Frames to set for one night stands and faster escalations: Sexually aggressive: has to be a cold read routine like the ring fingers as you can't tell a girl she is sexually aggressive. Sexual predators routine. Setting the frame (Jokingly) that she is trying to pick you up and that she's trying to get in your pants. Non-Judgemental: This can just be thrown out as a qualifier. " You know what i like about you is that you seem like you are really non-judgemental. I feel like I can be me around you. You don't seem like the type of person who judges others or cares what other people think." Non-judgemental about sex would also be good. But you would have to be careful that it doesn't seem like you are implying that she is a slut. Makes her own decisions: " You seem like the type of person who makes her own decisions. the type of person who if it feel right to you now you do it. You don't worry about what other people think of you." Adventurous and willing to try new things. Goes after what she wants: This could easily be framed around what she would do if there was no chance of failure. If she's going after it then you reward her and tell her how much you respect people who go after the people and things that they want. you could even then throw in a story about how you planned to make friends with a minor celebrity and you did or met an ex at a bar because she was the life of the party and you were determined to meet her. You relate it to meeting people. Passionate: Here you can talk about how when you hit on the right subject her eyes light up and you can tell that she is a deeply passionate person. You can also frame for flakiness by telling her how responsible and down to earth and honest she seems. Then qualifying just means that we deliver an IOI based on that personality trait so we give her the approval to continue being that way. In fact you could even incorporate a push/pull into it by then challenging her to be more of that trait. Frame " You know what I like about you? You seem like the type of person who goes after
what she wants like if there was something you wanted you'd go do it. Qualifier: I really like that because I feel like life is short and you have to go after what you want to have the type of life you want or be the type of person you want to be. Challenge: "But I wonder if you go after what you want even when other people tell you not to or that it's not the socially acceptable thing to do."
Open, Vibe, tease, mini isolate, strawberry field, 2-3 minutes of normal conversation (maintain the sexual frame) quick qualification What nationality are you? What do you do for fun when you are not out at bars, hitting on a guy like me? (smile) - Sexually aggressive: Rings/Strawberry/Sexual Predator - Non-judgmental: Rings - Makes her own decisions - Adventurous and willing to try new things. - Goes after what she wants - Passionate after qualification, you can have normal conversation. 60-40 her, you conversation ratio or even 70-30. After qualification, and after about 5 minutes of conversation, you have to let her know that you reward her for being real. (you know you are very interesting person, Hmmm, I think I like you.) then time bridge. Time Bridge for 4 days in advance (i.e. Friday/Saturday then time bridge for Thursday but bring them out before the time bridge) Open (at opener engage in touching, you dont have to do it continuously, just begin it. For myself I just touch them on the arm and dont escalate till I bait them into more comfort. Direct "Heeeeeyyyy! You guys having fun?" Hey, you guys seem nice, are you friendly? So where do all the cool people hang out? - Hey, you are cute. You should talk to me. (in using direct, you need to carry it quickly into conversation, these openers wont get you anywhere if you dont jump threads right away.)
Vibe So how do you guys all know each other? maybe into best friend test Well, her name, what do you do besides standing there and looking cute? (Built in qualifier use it as a calibration point). You guys seem funare you cool/friendly? Finger length routine: - Guess their occupation. Tease mini isolate "I don't kiss and tell..." strawberry field Well, I still am not sure about you. Check this out. I learned this little test in my undergrad psyche class called cool girl test. I am going to now give you the cool girl test. Wait. Do you have great imagination? K, cool. 2-3 minutes of normal conversation (maintain the sexual frame) quick qualification What nationality are you? What do you do for fun when you are not out at bars, hitting on a guy like me? (smile) Hey you know what, you guys are cool, I can tell from justSo what do you do when youre not hanging out at (name venue)? PUA: What do you want to be when you grow up, and dont say Princess. Or, PUA: Well, her name, what do you do besides stand around looking cute? Or, PUA: What are your three best qualities? Hard qualifiers she must be pretty hooked. If a girl is hot, use it. Shift questions and body, and attention to the target.
When you are talking to the target, step back in a way that she would have a back to her friends. less monitoring of her response mini isolation. You can also bait her into qualifying herself. You know, you seem interesting.not like those kind of girls who are judgmental or havent seen a lot of what the world has to offer In a two set, have the obstacle qualify the target. Say to the obstacle, Hey, your friend seems coolwhat does she do besides come to a bar and pick up guys? robs the target of her response potential take a way the validation builds tension. Through out the process, you are removing layers so they can respond real to you. After qualification, you can have normal conversation. 60-40 her, you conversation ratio or even 70-30. After qualification, and after about 5 minutes of conversation, you have to let her know 5. Comfort: The REAL comfort material comes from discussing your Ambitions and Ideal Lifestyle. Females are NOT goal-driven and even when it appears she is it is from a feminine energy viewpoint. Shell be more concerned with the process and the relationships and how they make her feel. So, goal-driven, ambitious men are EXTREMELY attractive to them. When I say ambitious you probably think business or money. But, you can be ambitious and passionate about anything. Whether its saving the whales or owning a skyscraper in Manhattan, ambition and drive to women are like 34DDs to men. The great thing about Ambition and Drive is you dont have to be there yet. Saying Having you ever seen the Dallas skyline at night from the 24th floor of a condo? and then going into how you are building your company because you went to a cocktail party and saw the view and fell in love with it and NOW have a plan to make it happen will make her feel like you feel when a hot girl is rubbing her 34DDs on you. Now what you need is a way to demonstrate your Masculine traits through your primary passion or your career. My career is in Advertising, which lends itself to this easily. If your job is not as sexy dont worry. Its the WAY you frame it at this point that will make all the difference in the world. Or, you can switch to your primary passion and create a stack based on that. The main point is its MORE than a job, that there is a higher driving purpose behind your actions. You are a MAN with a MISSION. If her thread is not fun or interesting, cut the thread and say, Why are we talking about this? This is a club. We should be talking about something fun. Or
If she DHV, (i.e. I am getting fat. Then agree and reinforce the frame by saying YeahI wasnt gonna say anything but then agree with the frame. Then make fun of her slightly Okay.you little chunky monkey. Three elements of comfort game: - Ambitions and ideal lifestyle (2-3) - Sexual framing (2) - Heart melters (2) - Sexual tension - Sexual escalation General Flow of comfort game: - Ideal life style - Ambitions - Male-Female Dynamics: You and I would never get along. - Cool girl test - Ambitions and life style - Passions/vibe - Cosmo routine - Heart melter Questions Game: You: Lets play the question game. Her: Whats the question game? You: Well, its like Truth or Dare but without the Dare, because I dont know how weird you are yet! The questions have to be good ones, no where do you work bullshit, ok? You go first! Her: I cant think of anything! You: Ok, how many boyfriends have you had? Her: Some outrageous BS number You: Well, to be honest with you, I have a lot of respect for women who make their own decisions about how they live their life. Our culture tries to put a lot of bad rules on women and it prevents them from developing into the person they want to be. So if a girl has a healthy view on sex and sleeps with people because she wants to, I think its admirable because she is not letting our society turn her into a fucking robot. Dont go overboard with the sexual questions though. Asking even one of the above questions might do just fine, especially if she responds positively, which is your cue that she would also be ready for the final question:)
I think of this as an interlacing spiral moving upwards to sex. Comfort, Sex. Comfort, Sex. Comfort, Sex. In lock-step. I try to get "Rings on Fingers" in after one comfort routine. "Rings on Fingers" does 3 things: 1. We're both good at keeping secrets 2. When she sees someone that she's attracted to she becomes sexually aggressive 3. I'm not judgmental And 1) It tells her she is sexually aggressive when she sees someone she's attracted to... 2) It tells her your are NOT judgmental 3) It says that BOTH of you are good at keeping secrets Here's an excerpt from a recent lay report where I think it helped immensely to allow her to become the aggressor... Quote: Originally Posted by CaptainJack "Did you know that what fingers you have rings on says stuff about your personality?" I point to the right pinky ring and say, "that means you are good at keeping secrets." HB: "i tell my brother everything." CJ: "just your brother?" that's ok. that's like a diary, plus he's family." CJ: "and your right ring finger, that means when you find the right person and you're attracted (pointing to myself), you become sexually aggressive" HB: "yessssssss!" Then, I look at my left middle ring and say, "This means I'm not judgmental." HB: "mmmmmmm...." Here's how I've been doing it lately in A2,C1 or mini-isolation. I'll look at the HB's hand and say, "hmmm..." HB: "what? what?" CJ: "You can tell stuff about people by which fingers they wear their rings on" CJ: *look away and go silent - this is to bait her to invest in the convo* HB: "tell me!" or "what do mine say???" Most girls will have at least two to 3 rings on their fingers. This is all BS but I like
to keep the pinky finger the "keeps secrets" finger and the right ring finger as "sexually aggressive when you find someone you like" finger then I'll say that the left ring finger (i.e. marriage finger) means you are sexually submissive (which makes sense because you DID get married - ha ha). Or That says that you are the type of person who makes her own decisions, the type of person who if it feel right to you now you do it. You don't worry about what other people think of you. CJ: "Wearing a ring on your pinky means you are good at keeping secrets. That's why you pinky swear and why mafia guys wear pinky rings." If she doesn't have a pinky ring on I say, "Damn, we'll have to pinky swear before we share deep secrets..." *smile* HB: "blah, blah" CJ: * Ill look at her other ring and it is usually either an index finger or the right ring finger for some reason * "And, this one means that when you find someone you are really attracted to (sneakily pointing to self with my thumb) you feel comfortable getting sexually aggressive with this person (again pointing to myself)" Or Right here, its important to NOT LET HER TALK. Because she might try to start qualifying herself as NOT being a slut or being marriage material or whatever because she thinks you want a prim and proper girl like that. If SHE does get that out then you are going to have to go REALLY DEEP in comfort and rapport later (so don't make it hard on yourself, don't let her make a peep). So roll right into the last one. Point to one of your rings (remember it can't be a finger that you've already used on her so you may need to adjust your ring before this) and say: "When someone wears a ring on this finger (pointing to your ring) it means they are NOT judgmental. They don't have all of the HANG-UPS about life and relationships that most people do." Then, later throughout the convo when sexual comments start coming out I (subtly) play with that ring once or twice. The change in her demeanor is visible. If you've ever done it you'll know what I'm talking about. The best way I can describe it is "She softens and then glows." Now, if I haven't gotten the Same Night Lay Logistics info by this time then I make sure to do it now. (look for "Same Night Lay" guidelines to find out those questions)
Next, I'll start laying down my Identity Stack which includes my Cosmo Routine I based off of Bandler's SRT. I've shared this in my eCoaching program. It MIGHT be on the Lounge as well. Sexual Escalation
The key to this for me is the idea of letting the girl know you're trying to fuck her but you like her even if you guys don't have sex. My overall frame which I verbalize to women after there is a mutual attraction (Meaning that I have already gotten her attracted to me and qualified her for things other than her looks) is that I like them, they're adorable and I want to hang out with them. But I'm always going to be trying to fuck them. But even if we don't have sex it won't bother me. And this prompts congruence tests, girls will say things like " You're not going to sleep with me" or my favorite " You're not going to sleep with me tonight!". I love the second one because it assumes we're going to sleep together at some point past tonight(Passive acceptance of my frame). This is good I've induced a congruence test based on getting her into bed. If I can pass these tests, I gain value sexually. My responses are always the same " We'll see" . Then I tease her for liking me. This creates a great push/pull dynamic where I'm chasing her by trying to get her into bed and then pushing her away for liking me. Thus creating a space where only a sexual relationship can happen. Combined with sexual framing, this is lethal. Once this frame and push/pull has been created I can now over-escalate ( By getting too sexual, Escalating too much in the venue.. etc) and blame it on her. After all I told her what was going to happen. Now I can also dismiss her and she will stay. I can say " Seriously this is sooo bad and I'm not going to stop. Do yourself a favor and don't let me undercook your muffins". It's a weird phrase which plays on confusion. And I did steal it from an Atmosphere song. The key to avoiding being a horny guy or pushy is to constantly dismiss her. You need to make the escalation and then warn her about you. I talk about how I'm not boyfriend material and will fuck her sister, break up with her before major holidays, etc... But I am charming. I also mercilessly tease girls about how much they like me and how they are making a bad decision. But it might be bad in a good way. This is one part of how I create a sexual interaction faster than anyone not named Captain Jack. The second part is using sexual framing to name and bring out the parts of her that want to have sex then and there, while shrinking the parts of her that are socially conditioned to not be a slut. Hope that clears some things up for everyone. Hit me up with Comments! How to build sexual tension, escalate physically and get her back to your place.
Dates part 2: How to build sexual tension, escalate physically and get her back to your place. On the last part of this mailbag , I talked about how to set up dates and what the overall
vibe should be. This time were going to discuss how to escalate things further. The most important thing about building sexual tension, and getting her back to your place is breaking the physical barriers early on. You need to re-establish touching as soon as you see her. When you see her you need to give her a big hug and then push her away. You want to retain the reset model of touching where you break all physical contact after every escalation. But you dont want to waste any time in escalating the touching. You should be holding hands when youre walking or driving to the first venue. You also want to look for random opportunities to kiss her if it didnt feel right at the beginning. One of my favorite ways to build sexual tension is through the use of the almost kiss. I learned this from Future and it is still my favorite way to kiss a girl. Somewhere on my date I will look at her while shes talking Ill say You know its really hard for me to pay attention to what youre saying when I keep thinking about kissing you. But I know were not ready for that yet so I tell you what were going to do. Were going to Almost kiss. Then I get them to pinky swear not kiss me and I promise not to kiss them. Then you get really close to their lips for about 2 seconds. This is great for building sexual tension because a few minutes later you can call it back and say youre ready for another almost kiss. Another thing you want to do to build sexual tension is alternate sexual indicators of interest with regular qualification statements and comfort frames. Dates are all about comfort so the first and foremost focus of our interaction should be on making the girl as comfortable with us as possible by letting her get to know us. B y demonstrating who we are and where we came from she gets to know us and feels more comfortable around us as shes starting to get an idea of how you are going to act at any given time. We also need to get her to become comfortable with our touch and our indicators of interest. That means we are going to be cycling qualification and compliments into our comfort material. We need to hit on the girl a lot and demonstrate that we are attracted to her both physically and for her non-physical attributes. Then we need to introduce sexuality. Qualification is the mechanism we use to move between comfort and seduction. This fractionating between hitting on her sexually, qualifying her and building comfort is what leads to getting laid on dates. The nest key step in getting girls back to your place is handling logistics. You need to have a reason to bring her back to your place. I always loan girls books at the end of the date or offer to let them come up to use the bathroom and get a glass of water if I couldnt get them up any other way. This is where having a cool movie, a great new piece of music even a cool or different type of wine or liquor like Absinthe comes into play. We want to create plausible deniability so that she doesnt feel guilty for coming up. Its also important to use a false time constraint when bringing a girl home if only to make her think she cant spend the night Lastly you need to let her know that you are interested in having sex with her. And its her fault for being so sexy This is what prepping is all about. Prepping statements simply let a woman know what you are planning to do later with her. Saying something like You have no idea what Im thinking about doing to you right now.. Stop being cute. Gives both a prep and a release to keep up the tension. But you have made a sexual indicator of interest. The more of these you can do the better. This is the art of coquetting.
I learned this from all the exotic dancers I dated. You sexually pull them in then push them away and take away their sexuality with a a tease and comfort building conversations. Make sure you demonstrate interest in her and sex with her. Sexual Tension One of my favorite ways to build sexual tension is through the use of the almost kiss. All most kiss: I learned this from Future and it is still my favorite way to kiss a girl. Somewhere on my date I will look at her while shes talking Ill say You know its really hard for me to pay attention to what youre saying when I keep thinking about kissing you. But I know were not ready for that yet so I tell you what were going to do. Were going to Almost kiss. Then I get them to pinky swear not kiss me and I promise not to kiss them. Then you get really close to their lips for about 2 seconds. This is great for building sexual tension because a few minutes later you can call it back and say youre ready for another almost kiss. Another thing you want to do to build sexual tension is alternate sexual indicators of interest with regular qualification statements and comfort frames. Dates are all about comfort so the first and foremost focus of our interaction should be on making the girl as comfortable with us as possible by letting her get to know us. B y demonstrating who we are and where we came from she gets to know us and feels more comfortable around us as shes starting to get an idea of how you are going to act at any given time. We also need to get her to become comfortable with our touch and our indicators of interest. That means we are going to be cycling qualification and compliments into our comfort material. We need to hit on the girl a lot and demonstrate that we are attracted to her both physically and for her non-physcial attributes. Then we need to introduce sexuality. Qualification is the mchanism we use to move between comfort and seduction. This fractionating between hitting on her sexually, qualifying her and building comfort is what leads to getting laid on dates. The nest key step in getting girls back to your place is handling logisitics. You need to have a reason to bring her back to your place. I always loan girls books at the end of the date or offer to let them come up to use the bathroom and get a glass of water if I couldnt get them up any other way. This is where having a cool movie, a great new piece of music even a cool or different type of wine or liquor like Absinthe comes into play. We want to create plausible deniability so that she doesnt feel guilty for coming up. Its also important to use a false time constraint when bringing a girl home if only to make her think she cant spend the night
Lastly you need to let her know that you are interested in having sex with her. And its her fault for being so sexy This is what prepping is all about. Prepping statements simply let a woman know what you are planning to do later with her. Saying something like, You have no idea what Im thinking about doing to you right now.. Stop being cute. Gives both a prep and a release to keep up the tension. But you have made a sexual indicator of interest. The more of these you can do the better. This is the art of coquetting. I learned this from all the exotic dancers I dated. You sexually pull them in then push them away and take away their sexuality with a tease and comfort building conversations. Make sure you demonstrate interest in her and sex with her. Statement of Sexual Interest (SSI) - Also called a "Sexual IOI." Very similar to Juggler's SOI concept. Letting the girl know you are interested in sex with her. "You should stop that or I'll be forced to kiss you right here." or "Stop. I'm trying so hard not to kiss you right now." "Hmmm....that's such a turn on. You better stop or I'm going to put you on that table and fuck you in front of everybody." "Oh God, you wouldn't be able to walk after I was done with you." that you reward her for being real. (you know you are very interesting person, Hmmm, I think I like you.) then time bridge. Time Bridge for 4 days in advance (i.e. Friday/Saturday then time bridge for Thursday but bring them out before the time bridge) If it goes stale, just move on.
What Do I Want? Step 1: Step 2: Step 3: Step 4: Step 5: Step 6: How can I take the above information and rework my game? If she doesn't fit #2, where could she fit in my life? Could she be a friend? Acquaintance? Contact? What positive qualities and experiences can I offer her? What am I passionate about that I could share with her or she could participate with me in? List them. How can I QUICKLY determine if a woman that I am talking to fits #2? What kind of woman/women do I want in my life? Describe them mentally and emotionally. (You'll no doubt recognize her physically!) It all starts with Knowing yourself. Who am I? What do I stand for? What do I value? What is my goal in Pick-up? How do I see it interacting/integrating with the rest of my life?
Process 1. Open: The real Game doesnt begin until she jumps through your Qualification Hoop. Everything leading up to that is simply to build her Interest (non-sexual attraction) enough to qualify herself to you. At opener engage in touching, you dont have to do it continuously, just begin it. For myself I just touch them on the arm and dont escalate till I bait them into more comfort. Openers: Direct (in using direct, you need to carry it quickly into conversation, these openers wont get you anywhere if you dont jump threads right away.) "Heeeeeyyyy! You guys having fun?" Hey, you guys seem nice, are you friendly? So where do all the cool people hang out? - Hey, you are cute. You should talk to me. You can follow up with: Well, her name, what do you do besides standing there and looking cute? - You guys seem funare you cool/friendly? Drinks opener:
- This is great to deliver at a bar, talking over your shoulder while waiting for a drink. Dont bother with it at malls or coffee shops; it may come across as contrived. Hey, if a guy and a girl get to the bar at the exact same time, who gets served first? (They respond.) See, my exgirlfriend was a bartender and she used to say that the girls got served first unless the guy was better at making eye contact. I bet you I get served before you do. Let a few seconds pass to see who gets served first. You can disturb her attention here by pointing at her collar and flicking her nose as she looks down, or lightly and playfully pushing her away with your forearm as she tries to get the bartenders attention. Works better at or near the bar: You: "Hey, what are you guys drinking?" Them: "whatever drink" You: "Hmmmm.....you know what they say about girls who drink "whatever drink", don't you?" Them: "What??" You: Cut the thread and go into a new thread. (open loop) Them: "Tell us what it means." You: Give them a hoop to jump through with a tease (example: "Wow, you are so demanding for a little girl!"), or I'll tell you when I get back from the bathroom. Them: keep asking you then complies to your hoop. You: "Well, I used to bartend and they said at my bar..." match drink and its meaning from cheatsheet below and add your personal spin based on the girls and calibration at the moment. Them: "Really?" If they ask where you bartended, tell them The Gold Club in Jacksonville, FL. You: "So how do you guys know each other?" or other transition piece. Finger Length routine. You can add that they are sexually frustrated if they are playing with their straw or peeling labels. Drinks Personality Drink: Beer Personality: Causal, low-maintenance; down to earth. Your Approach: Challenge her to a game of pool. Drink: Blender Drinks Personality: Flaky, whiny, annoying; a pain in the ass. Your Approach: Avoid her, unless you want to be her cabana boy. Drink: Mixed Drinks Personality: Older, more refined, high maintenance, has very picky taste; knows EXACTLY what she wants. Your Approach: You won't have to approach her. If she's interested, she'll send YOU a drink. Drink: Wine (does not include White Zinfandel) Personality: Conservative and classy; sophisticated yet giggles. Your Approach: Tell her you love to travel and spend quiet evenings with friends. Drink: White Zinfandel Personality: Easy; thinks she is classy and sophisticated, actually she has NO clue. Your Approach: Make her feel smarter than she is...this should be an easy target.
Drink: Shots Personality: Likes to hang with frat-boy pals and looking to get totally drunk ... and naked. Your Approach: Easiest hit in the joint. You have been blessed. Nothing to do but wait, however, be careful not to make her mad! Drink: Tequila No explanations required -- everyone KNOWS what happens here. THEN, there is the MALE addendum ---The deal with guys is, as always, very simple and clear cut: Domestic Beer: He's poor and wants to get laid. Imported Beer: He likes good beer and wants to get laid. Wine: He's hoping that the wine will give him a sophisticated image to help him get laid. Whiskey: He doesn't give a damn about anything but getting laid. Tequila: He is thinking he has a chance with the toothless waitress. White Zinfandel: He's gay.
If any bitching attitude then: "Listen, I'm just being social and having fun. You DO look like someone I used to know. Anyway, I can tell a lot about you from the way youre conducting yourself right now. I bet you act like this all the time, and when you do, a lot of people think you're a real bitch. But I can tell that you're not. I think that deep down that you're as sensitive as a little girl. Sure, a lot of people may think you're stuck up, but you don't have to act like that towards me. You probably just act like that because you get dorks hitting on you all day." After in the group, usually within 30 seconds if I havent hooked comfort yet then So how do you guys all know each other? Thats cool, cause I am from Hawaii and I am not used to how people socialize here. I mean I have been here for years, but Transitions: - Guess their occupation. - Finger length routine 2. Attract: Stripper Name Routine:
I was just talking to my dad today and he told me that if I had been born a girl, my name would have been Amber. Isnt that weird? Amber is such a stripper name. If I was a girl, Id be dancing on a pole right now instead of talking to you. (She responds.) Do you know what your boy name would have been? (She responds.) You look more like a Herman or GeorgeWhat would your stripper name be? (She responds. Improvise off of her answer, come up with names for her, portray her as naughty, etc.) DHV Spike Stories... BUT, my DHV spike stories contain references to a past girlfriend who was a dancer. The presups are that 1) she's hot 2) she can have any guy but she wants me and 3) she's a very sexual person At this point, if we're still talking I do "sleepy eyes" ala ijjjjjji and make my movements slow and deliberate with LOTS of eye contact and shoulder and lower back kino. I have a new routine which I'll post here in response to your comment. It has been tested at least 15 times with 14 out of 15 positive results so I'm cool to share it. Im really bad with names Basically, if she intros herself I say, "Oh, I have to warn you...I'm REALLY bad with names." She'll usually say something that will allow me to say,
"My ex was an exotic dancer and she used to change stage names as much as she'd change her panties...and...well...you know how when you get someone's name wrong but it just sticks in your head? Well, her stage name from the first time I met her stuck in my head and I couldn't get it out. Well, 3 months later we were fucking and I lost control and screamed out her stage name. But, she had FORGOTTEN that was her old stage name! It took me HOURS to calm her down. So, I'm just apologizing in advance...." Time Bridge: I originally started using it to "Seed the Timebridge" (seeding is a concept I came up with by accident because I noticed when I put a future TB location in an earlier DHV stories my TB attempts went through much easier and, in fact, I could often get them to ask me when I was going again so this also became a "Structured Chase Opportunity" for her...) "Have you ever smoked a hookah? I go to x-hookah place and it's real chill. They have all these pillows and you just relax and talk to friends and smoke a bit. I was talking to my friends and my girl didn't have to perform that night (this is bait for them to ask what she does so I can say, 'Exotic Dancer') and she was there. She started playing with my phone. We had been together almost all day so we took a lot of pics with the camera phone so I just assumed she was looking at them. Later that night I tried to call one of my friends to meet us somewhere. I was looking through my phone and noticed I couldn't find her number. Then, it dawned on me...there were NO MORE female numbers in my phone. She had DELETED all of them!" This goes right along with something else I've been doing. I've been telling HBs how a few of my ex's have been extremely jealous and clingy and then asking them if they are...they ALWAYS say no! but it seems to make them chase hard.
3. Isolation: 4. Qualification: Hey you know what, you guys are cool, I can tell from justSo what do you do when youre not hanging out at (name venue)? Qualification serves as calibration point if a girl is talking to you then she is qualifying herself to you. If she answers any of these questions/make an honest effort to answer them then she is ready to be isolated/kissed. PUA: What do you want to be when you grow up, and dont say Princess. Or, PUA: Well, her name, what do you do besides stand around looking cute? Or, PUA: What are your three best qualities? If she answers then you have built a great deal of value. Qualification is a waypoint in the interaction. It changes the dynamic, the very fabric, of the interaction. Its now two people genuinely interested in each other for MORE than physical reasons. 2 small qualifiers (yes/no question) 2 medium qualifiers 1 large qualifier 5. Comfort: The REAL comfort material comes from discussing your Ambitions and Ideal Lifestyle. Females are NOT goal-driven and even when it appears she is it is from a feminine energy viewpoint. Shell be more concerned with the process and the relationships and how they make her feel. So, goal-driven, ambitious men are EXTREMELY attractive to them. When I say ambitious you probably think business or money. But, you can be ambitious and passionate about anything. Whether its saving the whales or owning a skyscraper in Manhattan, ambition and drive to women are like 34DDs to men. The great thing about Ambition and Drive is you dont have to be there yet. Saying Having you ever seen the Dallas skyline at night from the 24th floor of a condo? and
then going into how you are building your company because you went to a cocktail party and saw the view and fell in love with it and NOW have a plan to make it happen will make her feel like you feel when a hot girl is rubbing her 34DDs on you. Now what you need is a way to demonstrate your Masculine traits through your primary passion or your career. My career is in Advertising, which lends itself to this easily. If your job is not as sexy dont worry. Its the WAY you frame it at this point that will make all the difference in the world. Or, you can switch to your primary passion and create a stack based on that. The main point is its MORE than a job, that there is a higher driving purpose behind your actions. You are a MAN with a MISSION. If her thread is not fun or interesting, cut the thread and say, Why are we talking about this? This is a club. We should be talking about something fun. Or If she DHV, (i.e. I am getting fat. Then agree and reinforce the frame by saying YeahI wasnt gonna say anything but then agree with the frame. Then make fun of her slightly Okay.you little chunky monkey. Three elements of comfort game: - Ambitions and ideal lifestyle (2-3) - Sexual framing (2) - Heart melters (2) - Sexual tension - Sexual escalation General Flow of comfort game: - Ideal life style - Ambitions - Male-Female Dynamics: You and I would never get along. - Cool girl test - Ambitions and life style - Passions/vibe - Cosmo routine - Heart melter - Because we like each other. It's sweet on a few levels. #1) If you run a lot of neg/disqualification (as Sinn does) then the confirmation that you do like her will give her poor widdle heart a ray of hope. #2) The 'we' part of it assumes that she likes you. Unless she outrightly denies it (which she won't) then she passively accepts the "we like each other" frame. The very worst
thing that could happen is she'll think, "What made him think I like him?" which will make her unconscious mind start sorting for things she did to demonstrate she liked him, thus strengthening the references. #3) It allows you demonstrate a piece of your personality so she feels like she knows you better. "I believe people should be rewarded..." Pretty sweet, huh? This is one of those cool things that after trying it mentally on the fly 10 or 15 times you could probably use on the fly in-field the very same night. Let's practice... Deep in comfort. Both of you are drinkless. "I'm going to the bar to get a drink. Keep me company." At the bar. "I'm not buying you this drink because we like each other...I'm buying it because my mother raised me to be a gentleman." Or, how about this one. "Wow, that's amazing! I LOVE knitting, too! I'm not just saying that because we like each other, my grandmother taught me how to knit because she always wanted a granddaughter but my parents just kept popping out boys..." Or... "I didn't just give you a squirting orgasm because we like each other, I did it because I'm a Sex God and I want you to tell all your friends. Then, they'll get so curious about me they'll try to nail me behind your back." Comfort Threshold sinn
Comfort like anything else has boundaries or as i like to call them thresholds. We use to adhere to the 7 hour rule, but as we got better and better at the game, the 7 hour rule starts to melt away and instead was replaced by this theory. In order to get a woman comfortable enough to have sex with you without LMR, you must be able to raise her comfort threshold, from comfortable not talking to you, to comfortable to talking to you, to comfortable isolating with you, to comfortable qualifying herself to you, to comfortable relocating with you to comfortable kissing you..... all the way to sex.
Well what are comfort thresholds you may be asking, Dictionary.com defines a threshold thusly; 4. Also called limen. Psychology, Physiology. the point at which a stimulus is of sufficient intensity to begin to produce an effect: the threshold of consciousness; a low threshold of pain. The place at which a stimulus(you) is of sufficient intensity(comfort) to begin to produce an effect(moving forward.) So the threshold is the level at which she is comfortable enough to move forward. For the sake of game, we define comfort as merely the lack of discomfort. For example if you are in a room and you don't notice the temperature, the room is said to be comfortable, if you are hot or cold, it is not. Every woman is a unique puzzle waiting to be solved, including their specific comfort thresholds, I have had sex with women as fast as 30 minutes from meeting them to as much as 30 hours into interaction. Every woman moves at her own pace, and it is important to recognize the way points and signals that she is giving you as to where her comfort is. The best way to judge comfort thresholds, is to test for them physically. Most of kino escalation, is about gathering information as to where her thresholds of touching are. A woman, can tell you she likes you and wants o have sex with you, but her muscular tension can't lie. Anytime you sense any hesitation or stiffness in a woman while interacting with her, she is broadcasting a message and that message is I"M UNCOMFORTABLE. And thus she wants us to alleviate her discomfort. A funny look off the opener is her way of telling you that she is not yet comfortable with you talking to her, an upturned hand on a kino test means she isn't yet comfortable with you holding her hand, her refusal of a bounce means she is not ready to be in a new location with you, her refusing to come back up to your apartment means that she isn't yet ready to be alone in a possibly sexual situation with you. So how do we increase her comfort? The key is to go all the way to the threshold and then pull back. Because everytime you go tot the line and release, you are demonstrating that she can trust you to not make her uncomfortable, which allows her to relax and let you go a little bit further as she realizes that she is in control of the pacing of the courtship. Everytime, you move back, the comfort threshold goes a little bit higher until ultimately she is comfortable enough to have sex and see you again afterwards. This seems really complex and I may have to edit it, as is I think only Future, Savoy and CJ will get this...
Sexual Framing:
I opted instead for Sexual Framing which makes most of her objections and frames moot anyway. If she is evaluating you in a Dating Frame or Potential BF Frame, trust me, there are a LOT of things to deal with there. But, the things to deal with for a sexual relationship are pretty small. Let's see if I can nail the most obvious ones down: 1. Am I attracted to him? 2. Can we do it without everyone seeing/knowing I'm a slut? 3. Do I feel sexy? 4. Will he judge me? There, that looks about right. There might be something about safety in there... could be some religious conflicts... but other than that it is a pretty damn small list. Compare that with the gigantic Boyfriend list...shit in there like...looks, job, education, religion, kids or not, how will he mesh with my friends/family, is he thoughtful/caring, will he like my pets, car, favorite hobbies, age, blah, blah, blah... Ideal flow should be that she doesnt care about the societys rules and restrictions. She goes for what she wants. She wants you so she will go after you. At the first opportunity (mini-isolation or full) I run my version of Strawberry Fields. I'm not saying she's a sexual being. It's the test! Cool Girl Test Well, I still am not sure about you. Check this out. I learned this little test in my undergrad psyche class called cool girl test. I am going to now give you the cool girl test. Wait. Do you have great imagination? K, cool. What color describes your personality? Make this part of cube/strawberry field/questions game. BLACK: These people are the misfits of the sex world and seek each other in kinship. They tend to prefer perverted sex, and are usually masochistic or sadistic in nature. They are moody and often perform at their peak when under stress or during unhappy times. BLUE: They are sincere, affectionate, and sensitive to their partner's needs. They consider lovemaking a fine art, and their approach is elegant. Men who love blue are like concert pianists; delicately ravaging their partner like they would play a baby grand. Women in the blue category enjoy sex to the fullest. They are exciting partners, but their passion might be compared to tidal waves, rather than fiery aggression. Both blue men
and women enjoy foreplay and the aftermath of lovemaking as much as the act. In marriages, a blue person is a wonderful mate, never failing to please the spouse and never seeking outside interests. BROWN For lovers of brown, sex is a 24-hour a day thing. They tend to say "I love you" often enough. Snuggling by the fire, walking in the rain or catching snowflakes on their tongue ins a turn-on to a lover of brown. They need lots of time and privacy to make love. But their emotions are such that one harsh word could end an affair. GREEN Those who prefer green are fresh and innocent in their approach to sex. Women who love green will make love like virgins all their life. And a man may also be a trifle clumsy and awkward, but in a charming and endearing sort of way. Green lovers are gentle, but not passionate. If chosen as a mate, one will never need to worry about infidelity. GREY The color grey is preferred by people who are indecisive. They can't get excited about anything - including colors - so they choose a noncommittal shade. Men who prefer grey look at sex as a means of relieving tension - nothing more nothing less. It's "wham, bam, thank you ma'am". Women don't make love, they have intercourse. They count the cracks in the bedroom plaster until the sex act is over with and done. When a grey marries another grey, the marriage is not exactly erotic. ORANGE Lovers of the color orange lean toward sexual fantasies. The sex act is regarded as a dramatic role, a one act play in which they are the star. Foreplay is as important as the act of love. They whisper sweet nothings; meaningless dialogue they feel fits their image. Orange people often do not experience orgasm - but they put on a damn good act. Men tend to pull their partner's hair and women tend to leave welts on their sex partner's back! PINK Persons who like pink show a reluctance to mature in sexual matters. Women tend to tease; to promise more than they intend to deliver. In some cases, they flaunt their femininity, but only because they secretly hate men. A great percentage of prostitutes boast entire wardrobes in pink. Men who like pink are the type who make 3 dates for the same evening and not keep them, preferring to pick up a dish in some bar instead. PURPLE Lovers of purple frequently consider themselves too regal for fun romp in the sack. Women sometimes are the type who hate to muss their hair. Men are businesslike in their approach to lovemaking. In both sexes, purple partners are more concerned with their fulfillment then anyone else's gratification. RED People who like red tend to be tigers in the sack. They are easily aroused and enjoy sex in
every way imaginable. Once the sexual spark is lit, it may take hours to extinguish. When two reds get together, the ensuing erotica would make Lady Chatterly blush. Lovers of red tend to be the aggressors and weaker colors should beware! YELLOW If you tend to favor yellow, your sexual drives are complex and lean toward the adaptable. The favorite color of homosexuals is yellow! But don't panic - not everyone who wears yellow is homosexual. In most cases the person will accommodate to the stronger partner's desires in a passive manner. You will never enjoy sex to the fullest, but you will never turn down an invitation from someone you enjoy or admire. Which fruit will you pick if you were handed these. 1. Orange 2. Apple 3. Banana 4. Coconut 5. Pineapple 6. Papaya 7. Mango 8. Cherry 9. Grapes 10. Peach 11. Custard Apple 12. Pear What is your pick??? (Please pick one ... then scroll down for interesting answer!) ORANGE If orange is your favorite fruit, it speaks of a person who has enduring patience and willpower. You like to do things slowly, but very thoroughly and are completely undaunted by hard work. You tend to be shy, but are reliable and trustworthy friend. You have an aesthetic bent of mind. You select your partner with care and you love with all your heart, and not in for just a fling. You avoid conflict at all costs. APPLE If apple is your favorite fruit, you are extravagant, outspoken, and sometimes impulsive. While you may not be the best organizer yourself, you make a good team leader and are good at taking things forward. You can take quick action in most situations. You enjoy travel immensely. You ooze with charm when you are with your partner. You have an enthusiasm for life, unmatched by most. BANANA You are a softie! Loving, gentle, warm and sympathetic by nature is
the banana lover. You often lack in self-confidence and are quite timid by nature. People often take advantage of your sweet temperedness, and sheer vulnerability to a situation. You adore your partner in every which way, both for their mental and physical beauty! Because of the way you are, your relationship is always very much in harmony! COCONUT The coconut lover is a serious, very thoughtful and contemplative person. Though you enjoy socializing, you are particular about the company you keep. You tend to be stubborn but not necessarily foolhardy. Shrewd, quick-witted and alert, you ensure that you are right on top of any given scenario, especially at work. You need a partner with brains, and while passion is important it certainly isn't everything for you. PINEAPPLE You are quick to decide and even quicker to act. You are brave in asking career changes, if that is what is to your advantage. You have exceptional organizing abilities and are undaunted by the size of the task at hand. You tend to be self reliant, sincere and honest in your dealings with others. Though you are not given to making friends very quickly, but once you do, it is for life. You rarely, if ever, make romantic overtures. Your partner is often impressed with your sterling qualities but disappointed in your ability to show affection. PAPAYA You are truly fearless and take much that happens in life, in your stride. You give considerable thought to things you do. You have a sense of humor that along with your generous nature keeps you in most people's good books. You are a go-getter in your professional life, and have a knack for being in the right place at the right time. You enjoy meeting new people and seeing new sights whenever you can. Your sense of humor is what attracts members of the opposite sex to you more than anything else. It is simply charming! MANGO A mango lover is a personality to be reckoned with, quite often you are a person who has quite fixed ideas, and influencing you is not an easy task. You tend to be an extremist with strong likes and dislikes, and times even like to control a situation. You enjoy getting involved in something that presents mental challenge. Strong as you may be, you are like a Kitten when you are with your partner. You accommodate the love of your life, and make up for all the strong will elsewhere! CHERRY If cherry is your favorite fruit, life isn't always as sweet for you.
You often face ups and downs, particularly professionally, and find that you make small sums of $$$, instead of a lump sum. You have a fertile imagination and are often involved in creative pursuits. You are a very sincere and loyal partner, but find that expressing your feelings is not very easy. Your home is your haven, and you love nothing more than being surrounded by close family and your beloved partner. GRAPES You are a polite person in general, but do have quick flare-ups of temper that cool down just as quickly. You enjoy beauty in all forms, including beautiful people. You are very popular because of your warm, gregarious nature. You have a zest for life, you enjoy everything you do, right from the way you dress, to your style and your day-to-day life. Your partner must share your zeal and zing for life to enjoy all you have to offer! PEACH Like a peach, you enjoy the juice of life in all its lush ripeness! You are the friendly sort, and are quite frank and outspoken, which adds to your charm. You are quick to forgive and forget; and value your friendships highly. You have an independent and ambitious streak in you that makes you a real go-getter. You are the ideal lover, fiery and passionate but sincere and faithful in love. You don't however like to display all that passion in public. CUSTARD APPLE You are a modest and conservative person who can be quite sensitive at times. You tend to be thoughtful and contemplative, and therefore are rarely rash in doing things. You are quite ambitious and are good at anything that requires much detailing or working with numbers. You are quick at finding fault with others. While looking for a partner, you value a person's intellect far above their looks or good old passion. You are quite shy and not very comfortable demonstrating affection. PEAR If you put your mind to something you can do it successfully, but by and large you tend to be fickle and have trouble completing a task with the enthusiasm you started it with. You need to know the results of your efforts almost immediately. You enjoy mental stimulation and love to get into a good discussion! You tend to be a restless and high-strung person, and are easily excitable. Strawberry You are the life of the party, and help to bring out the best in others. Your sense of fun and enthusiasm is picked up by those around you, and you tend to make friends quickly, even with complete strangers. You like interestingly flavoured foods. You often feel that you have an important destiny in life. Like the Blackberry, your personality is comprised of many different parts, all working together to make you whole. Your Sign is modified with your naturally bubbly personality
By CJ from Myster's Lounge I do the EXACT SAME thing each time. It is best when done in mini-isolation or full isolation. About this time the bf comes back and they introduce us. I get locked into position and wave HBLatinaDancer closer so it looks like she is gaming me. I take her through Strawberry fields: CJ: Imagine this. You're walking along the street and you come across a strawberry field. How high is the fence?..... show me with your hands HB: 5 feet CJ: "hmm.... interesting. looking quizzical at her HB: what? what? CJ: "Ok, you get inside. How many strawberries do you eat?" HB: Looks like she is thinking..."5" CJ: "5 Wow! You're sooooo baaaaad! Most people say one or two! You want 5! Oh my god! I could never take you home to mommy!" HB: "what! WHAT!?" touching my arm and pulling on me CJ: "Ok, last question. What about the farmer?" HB: "did he see me?" CJ: *shakes head with astonished look* "wow!" I shake my head again. She flips out and starts giggling and squeals. She bends over and tells her friend what I said and they look at me and smile and giggle. Here's the interpretation. I use the same basic interpretation each time: 1. Fence has to do with goals and aspirations in your life. You said X high. That mean that you have high goals but not so high you can't reach them. Its good thing. Some people set them so high so they cant reach them and get frustrated. Some people set it too low so they dont accomplish anything. Yours are right here that means that you have to make some effort and you gonna get your goals. 2. # of strawberries: "You said x-number, most people says 1 or 2. That has to do with your sex drive. Oh my god. I'd never get any rest! I cant never take you home to meet mom. You will have me tied to your bed with Gatorade and Red Bull. 3. Farmer has to do with society's rules and restrictions about sex. The societys rules and restrictions dont matter to you. So you just go after what you want and don't allow other people to run your life. You know thats cool that you werent even worry about the farmer. You do your own thing. Thats a good thing. These are all frames you are wrapping around her that are favorable to having a mutually
satisfying coital event (i.e. leads to super hot monkey love). try it! She'll often try to get you to do it on her friends later when you end isolation and merge back with the group. Try not to do it if you can prevent it. The freinds usually have a weird reaction to it, as if it is some sort of inside joke between you and the HB. -- Captain Jack Then stack it with Sexual Predator Routine "You know what? I can't even trust you guys. Girls are predators. Girls are SEXUAL predators! Guys think that they seduce women and have all this power. Yeah right! Girls choose. They choose. The guys just dangle themselves in front of them *thinking* that they made it happen, but they don't realize that its the girl who chose THEM. Girls are predators. They hold the cards. Examine the evidence. First, when a guy gets mad at his girlfriend, can he strap on his bitch boots, shove up his pushup bra, do up his hair and makeup, and head out to the bar and pull a girl home in under five minutes? Yeah right! It's GIRLS. YOU GUYS have the power to do that, not guys! (wait while girls laugh).. What percentage of guys can do that? Look at them (point at guys). They're leaning in and touching, making the girls all uncomfortable, but some of the girls like them anyway. But the guys THINK its that they were aggressive.. So what, like 5% of guys TOPS can do what 100% of girls can do. Second, girls are the only gender with one organ designed for NOTHING ELSE but sexual pleasure. (wait while girls laugh) And on that organ, there are ten times more nerve endings than anything a guy has. (wait while girls laugh) That's why, when GIRLS have sex, they go (put hands onto hair, and do the following very convincingly, like Meg Ryan "When Harry met Sally" style) "uhhhhhh.... oooohhh.... uhhhhhhh.." (wait while girls laugh hysterically screaming their heads off) IDEALLY, THE ROUTINE IS SUPPOSED TO DO THE FOLLOWING: -sets a humor anchor that can be re-used to keep them giggling throughout the duration of the pickup -gives you fodder to do "busting them on their mannerisms" stuff.. You can now tease them on their actions, and tease them on what they say, showing that its all designed to take advantage of you -provides a Kooper-style C&F role-playing frame, for them to play in, that results in them seducing you -makes the obstacles/peer group love you, because they think you're really fun, and it makes them trust you with their friend that you won't be pushy -establishes a frame that girls are meant to seduce guys, and its normal/cool/fun
-conveys that you know the deal about social interaction -conveys that you know not to make girls feel uncomfortable by being pushy or trying to "seduce" -conveys that you probably ARE one of the 5% of guys who can pull a girl home, because just implying that you know what's wrong with other guys' approaches, suggests that you know how to do it right -mind fucks her into a frame where she's becoming more sexually aggressive When I give her the results I often whisper them into her ear with my hand on her lower back. Then, I push her away. If this goes well I start bouncing between my comfort stack and more sexual presupps. Usually by this time you can start saying more direct sexual talk ("If your friends weren't here I'd spank you for being such a bad girl.") You can do this by doing questions game: (Combine it with SSI) Statement of Sexual Interest (SSI) - Also called a "Sexual IOI." Very similar to Juggler's SOI concept. Letting the girl know you are interested in sex with her. "You should stop that or I'll be forced to kiss you right here." or "Stop. I'm trying so hard not to kiss you right now." "Hmmm....that's such a turn on. You better stop or I'm going to put you on that table and fuck you in front of everybody." "Oh God, you wouldn't be able to walk after I was done with you." These are also baiting her to respond sexually. A common response to "I'm trying so hard not to kiss you..." is "well, don't try..." at which point you kiss her. I believe SSI's accomplish a few things: They demonstrate to her you are not afraid of sexual escalation They demonstrate to her you are super confident. They force her to have sexual thoughts and make sexual mental images which turn her on They let her know her time with you will NOT go wasted (since she is HOPING for sex.) The IOI-SSI Alternation and Escalation Principle - The idea that IOI's are more powerful when followed by an SSI and the IOI's and SSI's should become more intense and more direct as the seduction progresses. (We need better def. for "more intense and more direct" - most will understand but it's sloppy and ambiguous.) Questions Game: You: Lets play the question game. Her: Whats the question game?
You: Well, its like Truth or Dare but without the Dare, because I dont know how weird you are yet! The questions have to be good ones, no where do you work bullshit, ok? You go first! Her: I cant think of anything! You: Ok, how many boyfriends have you had? Her: Some outrageous BS number You: Well, to be honest with you, I have a lot of respect for women who make their own decisions about how they live their life. Our culture tries to put a lot of bad rules on women and it prevents them from developing into the person they want to be. So if a girl has a healthy view on sex and sleeps with people because she wants to, I think its admirable because she is not letting our society turn her into a fucking robot. From there the questions will get deeper and more sexual as the game goes along. Then after you have been playing for a few minutes, when its your turn you can say You: I have a good question for you Would you like to kiss me? Her: I dont know You: Lets find out! *kiss* You: I thought so! Dont go overboard with the sexual questions though. Asking even one of the above questions might do just fine, especially if she responds positively, which is your cue that she would also be ready for the final question:) I think of this as an interlacing spiral moving upwards to sex. Comfort, Sex. Comfort, Sex. Comfort, Sex. In lock-step. I try to get "Rings on Fingers" in after one comfort routine. "Rings on Fingers" does 3 things: I've field tested this 5 or 6 times now and I think about 4 of the Dallas PUA's that went to AsianPlayboy and Prophet's Dallas Workshop (which was AWESOME btw) tested it in field with good results too. I know this because I ran it on an HB and she told me I was the 2nd guy to tell her that! Ha ha! I have a short DHV type version and I've created a longer comfort version that I haven't tested yet in its entirety (it is longer and is nlp-pattern based).
Here is the shorter version: In every interaction I try to communicate (at least) the following 3 things to make sex easier... 1. We're both good at keeping secrets 2. When she sees someone that she's attracted to she becomes sexually aggressive 3. I'm not judgmental And 1) It tells her she is sexually aggressive when she sees someone she's attracted to... 2) It tells her your are NOT judgmental 3) It says that BOTH of you are good at keeping secrets Here's an excerpt from a recent lay report where I think it helped immensely to allow her to become the aggressor... Quote: Originally Posted by CaptainJack "Did you know that what fingers you have rings on says stuff about your personality?" I point to the right pinky ring and say, "that means you are good at keeping secrets." HB: "i tell my brother everything." CJ: "just your brother?" that's ok. that's like a diary, plus he's family." CJ: "and your right ring finger, that means when you find the right person and you're attracted (pointing to myself), you become sexually aggressive" HB: "yessssssss!" Then, I look at my left middle ring and say, "This means I'm not judgmental." HB: "mmmmmmm...." Here's how I've been doing it lately in A2,C1 or mini-isolation. I'll look at the HB's hand and say, "hmmm..." HB: "what? what?" CJ: "You can tell stuff about people by which fingers they wear their rings on" CJ: *look away and go silent - this is to bait her to invest in the convo* HB: "tell me!" or "what do mine say???" Most girls will have at least two to 3 rings on their fingers. This is all BS but I like to keep the pinky finger the "keeps secrets" finger and the right ring finger as "sexually aggressive when you find someone you like" finger then I'll say that the left ring finger (i.e. marriage finger) means you are sexually submissive (which makes sense because you DID get married - ha ha).
CJ: "Wearing a ring on your pinky means you are good at keeping secrets. That's why you pinky swear and why mafia guys wear pinky rings." If she doesn't have a pinky ring on I say, "Damn, we'll have to pinky swear before we share deep secrets..." *smile* HB: "blah, blah" CJ: * Ill look at her other ring and it is usually either an index finger or the right ring finger for some reason * "And, this one means that when you find someone you are really attracted to (sneakily pointing to self with my thumb) you feel comfortable getting sexually aggressive with this person (again pointing to myself)" Right here, its important to NOT LET HER TALK. Because she might try to start qualifying herself as NOT being a slut or being marriage material or whatever because she thinks you want a prim and proper girl like that. If SHE does get that out then you are going to have to go REALLY DEEP in comfort and rapport later (so don't make it hard on yourself, don't let her make a peep). So roll right into the last one. Point to one of your rings (remember it can't be a finger that you've already used on her so you may need to adjust your ring before this) and say: "When someone wears a ring on this finger (pointing to your ring) it means they are NOT judgmental. They don't have all of the HANG-UPS about life and relationships that most people do." Then, later throughout the convo when sexual comments start coming out I (subtly) play with that ring once or twice. The change in her demeanor is visible. If you've ever done it you'll know what I'm talking about. The best way I can describe it is "She softens and then glows." Now, if I haven't gotten the Same Night Lay Logistics info by this time then I make sure to do it now. (look for "Same Night Lay" guidelines to find out those questions) Next, I'll start laying down my Identity Stack which includes my Cosmo Routine I based off of Bandler's SRT. I've shared this in my eCoaching program. It MIGHT be on the Lounge as well. Cosmos Routine: CJ: I do a lot of writing and the other day I went into Barnes and Noble and there was a Cosmo on the table. Do you read that? On the front it said 97 ways to please your man! and I started thinking, Wait, my past girlfriends knew 25 at the most! Ive been getting robbed. But, there was a really interesting article in there about how these couples had
met and it said, well, hmmm let me put it this way, Whats the first sensation you feel inside your body when you realize youre really attracted to this guy? Statements like "I'm trying so hard not to kiss you right now" work well at this point. Kiss tests like going cheek-to-cheek to tell her something can often lead to what appears to be a spontaneous kiss, too. Sexual Tension: Sexual tension is the feeling created when two people mutually desire to escalate beyond self-perceived standards of what is socially proper. Socially proper escalation standards are defined both internally (our ideals, usually instilled in us by our parents/friends/bible) and externally (cant shag in a restaurant, with people watching, etc.). It can be as de-escalated as both sides feeling they cant/shouldnt flirt (perhaps because they work together), or as escalated as both sides doing everything but having sex though they want to (perhaps shes on her period). Lets take an example. Suppose you and a girl at church are attracted to each other. Sitting in the pews on a crowded Sunday you brush your knuckle against her outer thigh, you both know you cant escalate further even though youd like to (definitely not socially-proper given where you are). Result: crazy build-up of sexual tension. So then - if thats what sexual tension IS, lets talk about how we can use it. Think of sexual tension like a rubber band being pulled by two sides (ideas about what is socially proper, and a mutual desire to escalate). If the tension increases to a certain point, the rubber band will snap and fly in off one of two directions - one direction being triggering ASD, the other direction being a BJ in the bathroom. When trying to bed a girl, we can do one of two things 1) We calibrate our pace and manner of escalation in such a way that that the constraints of what is socially proper do not arise, rather you recognize them before they become an issue and you work around them- the rubber band is at ease - we call this being smooth. or 2) You yank the fucking rubber band so hard that its certain to fly in the direction you want - in other words, you and the girl mutually agree (spoken or unspoken) to smash through social standards and say fuck what people think, lets do what feels good.
Both methods have a time and a place - the first method however does not really have much sexual tension involved, so well focus on the 2nd. So then, the idea is that rather than trying to hide from it - you embrace what is taboo and indulge in your primal urges. How can we facilitate this? How can we yank the shit out of the rubber-band? Well, my favorite way of doing this is by creating a false social restriction then smashing through it. So for instance, suppose I gauge that the girl has no qualms about kissing on day1, but doesnt think its ok to give a bj on day1. Ill create a false social restriction about kissinglet the tension build (we both want to kiss each other but cant)- then yank the band/snap the tension by saying fuck it and kissing her passionately. More explicitly, this looks like- when I can tell shes near-ready to be kissed, Ill whisper something in her ear like man, oh mani so want to kiss you right nowbut not with your friends watching. A few minutes later I may grab her by her arse, pull her against me, and whisper to her this is driving me crazy, I really want to kiss you, but kissing in a bar is poor form. From here theres crazy high sexual tension so shell either agree with what Ive said or if shes bold shell say who cares. Either way, Ill kiss her HARD, then look at her devilishly, knowing we saw the line and crossed it anyway. And from here on out - were already over the line, so we may as well keep going and see where it leads. In short, the model is (assuming shes already attracted and compliant with your escalation) 1) Create social constraints impending relatively minor escalation (or acknowledge already existing constraints) - (thus sexual tension is built) 2) Blatantly cross the minor social constraints (easy enoughyou created them in the first place!) 3) Since youre already over the line, you may as well venture further. The sky is the limit. 5. Pull/Escalation: What I do now... Now that I use sexual framing it is actually advantageous for me NOT to kiss her until the car ride home. It builds anticipation and sexual tension to talk dirty, fill her mind with dirtiness and let it build. I WILL tease by getting real close to her like I'm about to kiss her and then not do it. I'll also talk in her ear a lot for the closeness and heat in her ear. Which brings me to another point. If you are talking in her ear and she presses her cheek to yours, she wants to be kissed.
One way to know if you're out of lock-step in terms of sexual escalation and comfort
is if she says things like, "Don't you want to know anything about me?" or "I hardly know you." - throttle back and run some more comfort. The rest of the logistical info can be found here. VERY quick pull hence the LMR. With that quick of a pull I'd suggest doing a lot of sexual teasing via push/pull. Pull her in and kiss her then push her away... talk normal... then do that stuff I told you about that makes it seem like SHE is seducing you with her mannerisms.
~ Captain Jack ~ Sinn on Qualification: Bait: If you have a proper conversational ratio, meaning that she is speaking about 40% of the time by now, she should be giving you things about herself that you can qualify her for. You can also qualify arbitrarily by telling the entire group that they are cool or fun. When she has not given you reasons to qualify her and you can tell she is attracted, you will want to bait her to tell you cool things about herself. You can do this through the use of questions or statements. In the beginning you want to make the hoops small and innocuous. Small hoops are any question that presents a stereotype that a woman wants to be seen as. She should be able to answer yes to this question with little or no thinking. Some examples are Are you adventurous, Are you smart, are you a good friend? Medium hoops require a little more thinking and are actually where you will find out if your qualification is taking or not. Some examples are what nationality are you? What do you want to be when you grow up? Its here that a woman can if uninterested stop the qualification by not answering or giving a slow answer such a s Im a mutt. If she is making an effort to answer the question, you need to reward her. Large hoops are blatantly qualifying questions where she will realize she is qualifying herself but do it anyway because she has already invested earlier. Any question can be turned into a statement fairly easily. For example lets say I want to find out what nationality a girl is. I could ask, What nationality are you? Or I can say, You look very German. Hook: And wait for her to either agree or disagree. You get the exact same information, at which point you need to give her an indicator of interest or compliment if you want to be
normal. Reel: Qualification will be the first point in the interaction where you can start to hit on the girl. So as soon as she answers the question, we reward her with a compliment. For example OMG youre German! I love German girls, my ex-fianc was German and we went over there and traced her whole family tree. Its such a cool culture. The compliment should be non-generic and non-physical. The more in-depth and specific you can be, the more qualified she will feel. Rapport Question: Try to find out what is cool about the girl relating to the qualification/her answer. The more actual interest you can show here the better. Release (Tease)*: You DONT need to release every time. In fact if you follow this cycle dogmatically the girl will even notice it. You may even have girls respond to I cant talk to you by saying ok. The key to releasing is to do it ONLY when a woman feels uncomfortable with you hitting on her. If she is accepting your compliments and likes them then there is NO reason to release it and it will seem fake. The best way to release is to throw in a non-sequitor tease. Something along the lines of Too bad your such a dork! The point of a release is to pop the bubble of tension that has been created by hitting on her. This makes her more comfortable as you have released the tension created by hitting on her. But remember you dont have to do it every time. Only when she appears uncomfortable with you hitting on her. Generally with a bigger IOI. Another way of releasing tension on smaller hoops (Which get smaller IOIs BTW) is to structure a challenge to her quality. PUA: Are you adventurous? Girl: Yeah Totally PUA: Awesome I love adventurous people. Theres just so much more fun. Whats the most adventurous thing youve ever done? Dont say running with scissors. Girl: One time I went skydiving
CJ teleconference You want them to do most of the talking Pick a target. Engage group first. Then give a little more attention to the target.
Teasing establishes a male-female dynamics, especially if you tease them in a way that you wont tease a guy. Male-female dynamic frames then sexual frame. Most of the teases in community are male-female frames. Remove worries!!! Open, Vibe, tease, mini isolate, strawberry field, 2-3 minutes of normal conversation (maintain the sexual frame) quick qualification What nationality are you? What do you do for fun when you are not out at bars, hitting on a guy like me? (smile) After qualification, you can have normal conversation. 60-40 her, you conversation ratio or even 70-30. After qualification, and after about 5 minutes of conversation, you have to let her know that you reward her for being real. (you know you are very interesting person, Hmmm, I think I like you.) then time bridge. Time Bridge for 4 days in advance (i.e. Friday/Saturday then time bridge for Thursday but bring them out before the time bridge) If it goes stale, just move on. Pre suppositions - Women want sex - Nobody remembers what happens tonight. - Only focus on positive. - Everyone is basically out looking for approval. Person who is out giving approval is high value. - Baseline is that its numbers game and its a numbers game that you can get better at. - Every interaction creates a reference point and sets that dont go as you have planned are more valuable than the one that do. Hard qualifiers she must be pretty hooked. If a girl is hot, use it. Shift questions and body, and attention to the target. When you are talking to the target, step back in a way that she would have a back to her friends. less monitoring of her response mini isolation.
You can also bait her into qualifying herself. You know, you seem interesting.not like those kind of girls who are judgmental or havent seen a lot of what the world has to offer In a two set, have the obstacle qualify the target. Say to the obstacle, Hey, your friend seems coolwhat does she do besides come to a bar and pick up guys? robs the target of her response potential take a way the validation builds tension. Through out the process, you are removing layers so they can respond real to you. Time bridge every single sets. Concentrate on three sets. If you are talking to a girl about 30 minutes before closing time (after time bridge set), say, Shit.its already 430. I am having such a great time, I dont want the night to end. Gage her response. You know what.I am going to my place and put on a movie and grabbing a drink. You should come along. Parade first three sets then watch the response from other girls. Its all about freeing her sexuality. Approach machine. You need more references. 25 more sets. Sinn:
Oh funny sidenote as she's begging me to call her as i walk her to her ride, I say " I really want to have sex with you so of course I'm going to call you! But even if we don't you're awesome and I want us to be friends...
Sexcalation
I wanted to write a post about the idea of sexual escalation. There is a major difference between escalating touching and escalating the increasingly sexual nature of the interaction. In the classic MM model of seduction, a premium is placed on the idea of maintaining higher social value at the expense of direct sexualizing of the interaction. This is because guys buy into the completely bullshit idea of " The Seven Hour Rule". That some magical bell goes off in a woman's head when 420 minutes have passed and all of a sudden you guys end up in the bedroom and sex just happens. or the seduction is mutual as it's sometimes explained. Unfortunately this just doesn't correlate to real world situations. In the real world it
is very possible to have sex with women within 30 mins if you know how to recognize the signs and escalate sexually in a comfortable manner. The key to this for me is the idea of letting the girl know you're trying to fuck her but you like her even if you guys don't have sex. My overall frame which I verbalize to women after there is a mutual attraction (Meaning that I have already gotten her attracted to me and qualified her for things other than her looks) is that I like them, they're adorable and I want to hang out with them. But I'm always going to be trying to fuck them. But even if we don't have sex it won't bother me. And this prompts congruence tests, girls will say things like " You're not going to sleep with me" or my favorite " You're not going to sleep with me tonight!". I love the second one because it assumes we're going to sleep together at some point past tonight(Passive acceptance of my frame). This is good I've induced a congruence test based on getting her into bed. If I can pass these tests, I gain value sexually. My responses are always the same " We'll see" . Then I tease her for liking me. This creates a great push/pull dynamic where I'm chasing her by trying to get her into bed and then pushing her away for liking me. Thus creating a space where only a sexual relationship can happen. Combined with sexual framing, this is lethal. Once this frame and push/pull has been created I can now over-escalate ( By getting too sexual, Escalating too much in the venue.. etc) and blame it on her. After all I told her what was going to happen. Now I can also dismiss her and she will stay. I can say " Seriously this is sooo bad and I'm not going to stop. Do yourself a favor and don't let me undercook your muffins". It's a weird phrase which plays on confusion. And I did steal it from an Atmosphere song. The key to avoiding being a horny guy or pushy is to constantly dismiss her. You need to make the escalation and then warn her about you. I talk about how I'm not boyfriend material and will fuck her sister, break up with her before major holidays, etc... But I am charming. I also mercilessly tease girls about how much they like me and how they are making a bad decision. But it might be bad in a good way. This is one part of how I create a sexual interaction faster than anyone not named Captain Jack. The second part is using sexual framing to name and bring out the parts of her that want to have sex then and there, while shrinking the parts of her that are socially conditioned to not be a slut. Hope that clears some things up for everyone. Hit me up with Comments! Meet up: First of all stop calling dates d2s. I never really understood that. It was like somehow if we called them something else it doesn't set the "dating" frame. What's wrong with the dating frame? Women do sleep with guys they go on dates with. Just this Sun I had a girl tell me she never sleeps with guys on the first date. After I had just fucked her on our first date where we went to dinner... There's nothing inherently wrong with the dating frame. There's something wrong with the " I'm trying to impress you" frame. Anyway enough of my ranting about semantics. I just think the terminology is really weird and I was always waiting for one of the community guys I used to hang out with to refer to his girlfriend coming over as a day 46.
The most important thing in my mind about dates is where they start. There's only one correct answer here and that's at your place. Now this assumes you live near where your date is going to happen. If you don't something is wrong and you should plan a date closer to your place. There are always cool neighborhood bars, coffee shops, restaurants etc, near where you live. You just need to get out and actually find them. So you've set up your date( Which could and should be a separate post in and of itself) and you tell her to meet you at your place " Call me when you get there and I'll come out." Then when they call I come outside but whoops I forgot my wallet. That means we have to go back up. It's vitally important that you get the girl used to her being in your place without you trying to make a move on her. My wing Captain Jack alternatively tries to escalate when they come in and if he can't close them then( Which is rare for him) he takes them on the date. That's another strategy though he does have super powers so mere mortals should use that at their own risk. Back to the previous point showing a woman your home takes away the fear of the unknown for her and it will be far easier to get her back to your place later. The next thing EVERY date needs is multiple venues. The more place you spend time with a woman in the longer it will feel like she has known you. My particular date goes through up to 7 different locations not counting my place. The best thing is none of them are more than 3 blocks from my place. This is how you can do dinner dates without setting up a traditional dinner date. In the middle of doing something else just casually mention how hungry you are and suggest stopping in somewhere for a bite. Now while you're on the date you should be filling in the empty canvas of your life. Now is the time to talk about your hopes and dreams, the things you are passionate about, your friends, and family, hobbies etc.. It's time to literally be yourself. One of the things every girl will think when she's on a date with you is " How would my life be different if this guy were my boyfriend" So you want to make sure you paint a vivid picture of your life. I tend to rant about things because that's how I am. I also run my grounding sequence on my first date as I know I'll have her undivided attention for at least 25 minutes. You asked if you should keep it superficial or get deeper. My answer is that you should get deep but be fun! A lot of guys will make the mistake of neglecting attraction entirely on the date. You need to remind her periodically of why she was attracted to you in the first place. Fun is the most important factor in all of your dealings with women but especially with dates. If she's having fun whatever you are actually doing doesn't matter. Conversely if she isn't having fun you could be doing her favorite thing in the world and she'll hate it and you. Keep things playful and flirty the entire way but don't be afraid to demonstrate your passion and the things you actually care about. Kissing- You asked if you should kiss or not. You should be kissing the girl as soon as you think you can. If you made out when you met her then you have to be able to tell when she hugs you hello if you can kiss her right away. Usually I will hold off on kissing in the beginning to build some more sexual tension for later. Tomor I'll finish up this article by talking about how to build sexual tension on a date, how to escalate physically, how to get her back to your house at the end and much much more.
Same Sinn time, same Sinn station How to build sexual tension, escalate physically and get her back to your place. Dates part 2: How to build sexual tension, escalate physically and get her back to your place. On the last part of this mailbag , I talked about how to set up dates and what the overall vibe should be. This time were going to discuss how to escalate things further. The most important thing about building sexual tension, and getting her back to your place is breaking the physical barriers early on. You need to re-establish touching as soon as you see her. When you see her you need to give her a big hug and then push her away. You want to retain the reset model of touching where you break all physical contact after every escalation. But you dont want to waste any time in escalating the touching. You should be holding hands when youre walking or driving to the first venue. You also want to look for random opportunities to kiss her if it didnt feel right at the beginning. One of my favorite ways to build sexual tension is through the use of the almost kiss. I learned this from Future and it is still my favorite way to kiss a girl. Somewhere on my date I will look at her while shes talking Ill say You know its really hard for me to pay attention to what youre saying when I keep thinking about kissing you. But I know were not ready for that yet so I tell you what were going to do. Were going to Almost kiss. Then I get them to pinky swear not kiss me and I promise not to kiss them. Then you get really close to their lips for about 2 seconds. This is great for building sexual tension because a few minutes later you can call it back and say youre ready for another almost kiss. Another thing you want to do to build sexual tension is alternate sexual indicators of interest with regular qualification statements and comfort frames. Dates are all about comfort so the first and foremost focus of our interaction should be on making the girl as comfortable with us as possible by letting her get to know us. B y demonstrating who we are and where we came from she gets to know us and feels more comfortable around us as shes starting to get an idea of how you are going to act at any given time. We also need to get her to become comfortable with our touch and our indicators of interest. That means we are going to be cycling qualification and compliments into our comfort material. We need to hit on the girl a lot and demonstrate that we are attracted to her both physically and for her non-physcial attributes. Then we need to introduce sexuality. Qualification is the mchanism we use to move between comfort and seduction. This fractionating between hitting on her sexually, qualifying her and building comfort is what leads to getting laid on dates. The nest key step in getting girls back to your place is handling logisitics. You need to have a reason to bring her back to your place. I always loan girls books at the end of the date or offer to let them come up to use the bathroom and get a glass of water if I couldnt get them up any other way. This is where having a cool movie, a great new piece of music even a cool or different type of wine or liquor like Absinthe comes into play. We want to create plausible deniability so that she doesnt feel guilty for coming up. Its also important to use a false time constraint when bringing a girl home if only to make her think she cant spend the night
Lastly you need to let her know that you are interested in having sex with her. And its her fault for being so sexy This is what prepping is all about. Prepping statements cimply let a woman know what you are planning to do later with her. Saying something like You have no idea what Im thinking about doing to you right now.. Stop being cute. Gives both a prep and a release to keep up the tension. But you have made a sexual indicator of interest. The more of these you can do the better. This is the art of coquetting. I leraned this from all the exotic dancers I dated. You sexually pull them in then push them away and take away their sexuality with a a tease and comfort building conversations. Make sure you demonstrate interest in her and sex with her. Now you guys know how to set up and start dates, the amount of venues to take them through, what to talk about while on a date and how to escalate, build sexual tension and get girls home with you. Here's a re-post of Brad P's Aggro big Brother stack for escalatibg touching when you are alone with a girl. Good Stuff. This has been working good. Its for when you have the girl in isolation but she knows it's on so she's using a shield to stop you from escalating. 1. Pillow fight-if the chick is not letting me escalate i just bust her in the head with a pillow. I find sometimes chicks know it's on so they try to sit somewhere far away, or pet their dog, talk about something else so you don't start escalating. That's when they get the pillow to the head. This starts to get them heated up. 2. Tickling- just tickle the girl a bit. Not too much cause if they get totally giggly sometimes it's hard to bring the energy back down to something manageable. 3. Pick her up, throw her on the bed. 4. Wrestling. 5. The capper is "stop hitting yourself!" For those who don't have an older sibling, this is when you just grab the chick's hand and start smacking her in her head with her own hand while saying "Stop hitting yourself." Over and over. They feel very frustrated but also dominated. Of course don't hit too hard, just hard enough to make her feel helpless and dominated. From there's it's pretty easy to go into kissing or hair pulling and you've dismantled whatever shield she was using. Brad P. I like the frame of touching her like her big brother would leading to kissing etc... That's something I do a lot as well. I always try to wrestle with girls before transitioning to making out.. S
Introduction ============= In the Secret Society we deal in positive emotions. Our aim is to feel good. Positive emotions create "pull". When we carry positive emotion we carry pull. Understanding pull is crucial to your full contribution to the Society. Amongst members, positive emotions pull positive emotions. Another way to understand this is that positive emotions are contagious. A third way to understand this is "like attracts like", the so-called Law of Attraction. Male members are the creators of positive emotions, the carriers of pull, and thus they have special duties in the Society. These will be covered below. Background =========== When the pull of a man and the pull of a woman are equal, and rapport is broken, sexual tension is created. Women must relieve this tension. It is for this reason the Secret Society was established. Two skills to master in your time as a member: 1. Building and maintaining sexual tension 2. Managing logistics A female member has three options to relieve sexual tension with a man 1. Establish/reestablish rapport (LJBF) 2. Assert more pull than him (ASD, jealousy) 3. Fuck
She will almost always try options 1 and/or 2 before proceeding to option 3. If tension remains long enough for her to believe that she cannot relieve it by options 1 or 2, she must fuck. It is your obligation as a member to let women exhaust options 1 and 2 with you so that they may confidently proceed to option 3 and the two of you can feel good. Please note: You must give her full confidence that option 3 is the only option. If she does not believe 3 is the only way to relieve the tension she will not fuck (LMR) and will keep trying option 2. Her confidence in using option 3 often is dependant on your confidence in the amount of pull you carry and how well you communicate that confidence to her. ============== Member skills ============== Building and maintaining sexual tension ======================================== A male Secret Society member can create positive emotion internally and use them to stimulate women, hence attracting/ triggering her own positive emotions and making her feel good. (Female members must get positive emotions from external stimuli, e.g. other members.) Ultimately a male member can trigger positive emotions in a female member up to her physical and psychological limit for such pleasure, reaching a climax in orgasm, through sex. We call the sum total of this process the "Gift". Our female members prefer male members who have the most certainty in the amount of pull they have to give out and trigger reciprocal pull in female members. In short they like male members who know their own Gift very well and can advertise it quickly and effectively. It should not be necessary for a female member to have questions about your Gift. Our advice to new male members is: Learn to know your Gift well and be able to put it on display. In our experience female members tend to prefer Gifts that appear popular among other female members. As a new member, be patient.
Please note A female member should only receive the Gift after she is fully confident option 3 is her only option to relieve sexual tension. Only then is she eligible. We have many more female members than male members and Gifts are in short supply. Do not offer your Gift prematurely to ineligible members. Do not spend too much time with any ineligible female member at the expense of other potentially eligible female members. Failure to exercise care in this could mean other eligible female members are denied the Gift. In other words, get to know all our female members that you find attractive, as many at a time as possible. Your Gift is in demand. How to build and maintain sexual tension ========================================= By making her pull equal to his and then breaking rapport a male member creates sexual tension. (Male members always have more pull than female members. If you do not believe this it could result in your membership being revoked.) Having equalized the pulls, he then maintains the tension by adjusting her pull to always meet his. He must maintain the tension long enough for her to exhaust options 1 and 2 in her mind. Too much pull by one member over another will cause sexual tension to disappear. If he gives her too much pull, tension will disappear. If he gives her too little, no tension will be created. As Goldielocks would say, it must be "just right". To build up her level of her pull, he draws positive emotions out of her through auditory and kinesthetic stimulation. These are sneak previews of the Gift. He carefully rejects any neutral or negative emotional responses by withdrawing stimulation. He rewards elicited positive emotions with more sneak previews, each time escalating the stimulation and revealing more of the Gift. Any male member found rewarding negative emotions may have his membership revoked. The aim of all Society members is to feel good.
A note on exhaustion of option 2 In most cases you will be dealing only with ASD when a female member is exhausting option 2. There is no need for a male member to respond to adjust pull levels when ASD arises. For our purposes it is not a negative emotion. The male member should simply maintain status quo pull levels and allow the option to be exhausted from her mind. Then proceed with more stimulation. Occasionally a female member may use jealousy in exhausting option 2. Certain of our younger female members who are still unsure of their maximum potentials for pull like to use this as a way of testing their own potential to receive Gifts. In the event a female member attempts to assert her pull is greater than his by showing him her pull over other men, then it may be necessary for him to counter this by asserting his own pull over other remale members, e.g. by actual demonstration. We do not recommend engaging in jealousy creation unless absolutely necessary as this often results in feeling bad which is against the Society's aim for all members to feel good. In any event when he feels the potential recipient is confident option 3 is necessary to relieve the sexual tension, it is time to lead her to a place for generous presentation of the Gift. How to manage logistics ======================== Male members are in charge of managing logistics. As such, they must exercise leadership and lead the female member to an location suitable for Gift presentation. Throughout all interactions with female members male members must ensure she remains willing to follow. A male member does this by leading her through several relocations to test her willingness to follow. Any indications from her that she is not willing to follow should be addressed by reminding her, implicitly and with tact of course, that your Gift is in demand and other eligible female members may be waiting for it.
I call it "The House": Tell the chick to imagine herself standing inside a house. As she is standing there, 5 things are taking place which demand her immediate attention: 1. A baby is crying.
2. 3. 4. 5.
The phone is ringing. Somebody is knocking on the door. Water is running in a sink. Clothes are hanging outside to dry and it's starting to rain.
Ask the chick to tell you in which order she would take care of each of these problems. Once she tells you this, explain to her that her answers represent her priorities in life, since each problem has a specific meaning: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. The The The The The baby represents her family. phone represents her love life. knocking on the door represents her friends. water represents money. clothes represents her career.
Many students on bootcamp get completely caught up on opening and attracting girls. While these are crucial steps, understanding qualification and the value of setting a qualifying frame is absolutely crucial to not only successfully getting a woman but getting better with women generally. All of the most succesful guys I know, whether theyre naturally good - or learnt to be cool on the internet - make liberal use of framing and qualifying.
Breakthrough Comfort
This is really the most exciting stuff that Ive ever run into in the community, if you guys were lucky enough to be in NY for Day game a month ago, or Phoenix, or NY this last weekend you guys have gotten a taste of Advanced Comfort. How this system came to be was as Future and I have become better friends, I would notice that he was getting reactions from girls unlike ANYTHING I had ever seen before, basically girls fell MADLY in love with him. He also didnt get LMR and converted every day 2. In fact recently he helped me when I was having some problems with HB perfect stripper. The guys comfort game is better than ANYONE Ive seen. So I started to look at what exactly he was doing and over the course of about 6 months we have backwards engineered comfort to produce THE EXACT SAME RESULTS. It truly is the most powerful system I have ever seen for making woman truly crazy about you. Heres a brief preview, plus a couple of new things I noticed tonight. This system was responsible for 16 lays of mine in late June early July of last year. 1. Passion/Purpose- You must be able to convey to her convincingly that you are a man of a greater purpose. That you are going places she will want to be. You are driven to pursue your life goals and do so without any sort of hesitation. In fact your purpose has driven you to become pre-selected by women, a leader of men and a protector of your loved ones.
2. Seeing her the way she wants to be seen. Every woman has a purpose that she secretly strives to achieve. There is a reason why she does what she does, or doesnt do what she wants to. Find out what this value is and you will be able to give her the most amazing compliments she has ever heard. She needs to feel that you see her, as the person that little girl inside her yearns to be. 3. Hot/Cold. The hot comes in the form of the most amazing compliments she has ever heard, the cold comes in the form of SMALL releases. I.E you are absolutely amazing and whatever you want to be I can see you doing that because of x,y and z. Too bad youre such a douche bag. The key is that you do not tell her that she doesnt have what it takes to be who she wants to become. 4. Future Projections- This is different from future adventure projections, which are silly. These are plans that you are making with her anytime from a week to a year down the road, that show her that you are a man of action and she can come along if she wishes. 5. Emotional Honesty- The second part of future plans, is that EVERYTHING that you say you are going to do, you must do. If she ever feels that you are not truthful, the entire power of Advanced Comfort will be lost as she will not believe that you actually see her that way. She will think you are just trying to get into her pants. 6. Whirlwind Courtship- Advanced comfort breaks the rules of only seeing a woman once a week or talking to her once a day. In fact the more time you log, the more powerful the method is as it is further reinforcing your legitimacy. 7. The feeling that both of you are bound for greatness and you are on the same path. The key to this is to show her that you are going to be someone AMAZING, then ratifying that she can be someone amazing and helping her on her path. Pushing her in the right directions the way someone did for you earlier. You guys are on the same path, you just happen to be further along. This is all based on stuff that Future did naturally that I have backwards engineered. This is the real deal. Technology is morally neutral but if you have an understanding of this, I implore you guys not to use it the wrong way.
Natural Tim
Let me start this quickfire technique with a question: How is your sexual intent going? When you are talking to a girl you have just approached, do you have that FURY and FIRE blazing up every fiber of your body? That DANGEROUS FURY that You want her, and it shows as clear as a tigers eyes focusing on its next wild prey. She feels it and it strikes a deep chord with her - you are not like any other man. You can be a man, she can be a woman.
Something DEEP inside your core of MAN is moving you to her. Moving the interaction forward. And guess what? she wants to move with you. The reason I put pictures of hot girls at the top of a lot of my posts is to SNAP you out of whatever you are doing and remind you why you are here with me, on the journey! You CANNOT have a sucessful pickup without CORE MANLY SEXUAL INTENT. It starts INWARD and then displays OUTWARD. I wanted to share with you just one of the ways in which I generate it inward, in myself. Now, there is so much going on in your head before and during an approach that it is easy to get distracted away from that core MANLY FURY that drives the deep feeling inside. You start thinking on surface levels. Like, how is the conversation going? what do I say next? is she attracted to me? am I cool enough? these games you play in your head dissolve the true passion that ignites and drives the interaction to the bedroom. SO here it is. Quickfire focus: Sexual Intent GOAL: Core FURIOUS sexual INTENT. The girl feels like you are DEEPLY attracted to her and will go to the ends of the earth to pursue her all the way to the bedroom. Whatever it takes. You are DANGEROUS. STEPS: 1. As you are talking to the girl, ask yourself - why am I talking to her? 2. ANY ANSWER other than: I WANT HER NAKED IN MY BEDROOM TONIGHT is WRONG and YOU are lacking in your core INTENT. You are also LYING TO YOURSELF and HER. She will sense something is awry, you are typical conversation man - asexual. 3. To BOOST intent, start looking at the girls lips while you talk to her. Really focus on them. Now dont be a WEIRD lip-leerer, just look at her eyes, but make a conscious decision to focus on her lips around 80% of the time. Physiologically what this does is send signals directly to the part of your brain controlling sexual agressiveness in men. Like a light switch it will snap you out of conversation man who has no purpose or direction. Its crazy how effective something this simple is.
I have seen crazy differences in effectiveness in myself and bootcamp students by following this general rule. LOOK AT LIPS and FLICK THE SEXUAL SWITCH. Try it on your next approach! Kicking the shoes off. (Minimal game explained) Hello there. I want you to remember the most recent time you went to a persons house or apartment for the very first time. Maybe you didnt even know that person very well Most of the time it goes like this: You step inside after a brief lecture of how sorry they are that their house is a mess (even though most of the time its in totally pristine shape). Following that is the tour of everything; Here is the bed, here is the kitchen, oh let me show you where the toilet is would you like to sit here? or here?. Along the way, of course, there is running commentary on EVERY item in the place. It gives that weird vibe in the air where the host is trying to show you their most prized space and worrying what the guest thinks, while the guest is actually trying not to trip over anything or say the wrong thing about the wierd painting on the wall. Its uncomfortable for both guest AND host. My question is why is it so uncomfortable? Let me tell you a story about my buddy Natural Sean. This guy ALWAYS has the hottest girlfriends. A true flawless natural. He is a magnet and I couldnt understand his magnetic magical power until recently. Anyway Sean invited me over to his place for a quiet few drinks with some friends. He aswered the door with a big hello, telling me to kick my shoes off anywhere I like. I put them neatly at the front door as he grabs his arm around my neck and drags me inside. Sean has scruffy hair and has such a laid back, cruisey energy that you cant help but feel relaxed around him. He leads me straight through the house, no commentary, no tour, just out the back to where we end up sitting. Without saying a word he jumps up and fixes us a drink chatting about nothing in particular as he goes. Awesome. I immediately feel comfortable and decide that THIS is the way to bring girls to your house.
It wasnt a special house, it was actually kinda messy. Although it had one thing: A special VIBE. That vibe was total comfort. He wasnt trying to make his place seem great - it was great because we were there. That is all. He had that vibe in everything he did. His car was RUBBISH but for some reason it seemed cool because it was his and HE thought it was cool. He made no attempt to say it was the best, or the worst. It was what it was, and he was happy with that. When you were around this guy it seemed like nothing else was needed in the world. He wasnt talking about how busy he was in the future or about past things. Sean lives for the very second he is in, he ENJOYS every second. Minimal game at its finest. Amazed at this I started adopting the kick the shoes off minimal game practice throughout EVERYTHING I did when dating girls. When I approached a girl in a bar or club, I would talk to her like it was my house and I wasnt TRYING to get her to like it. I just AM. And happy to be that too, thankyou. When I called a girl in the phone, I simply said what was needed in that moment. Hey there, what are you up to? Oh cool Yeah, come hang out. Strictly no swirly lines or stories or anything - just cruisey, laid back, GIVING VIBE the whole way. When I bought a girl to my house, I just threw my shoes off and made no attempt to clean up or explain the dirty socks on the floor. I would sit myself down with no fuss, she followed and sat too. I was comfortable therefore SHE was comfortable. The result: my happiness and game skyrocketed. The lesson: DONT TRY SO MUCH! Be happy with what is happening. Enjoy. As soon as there is that TRYING vibe coming off you (like your trying to get pickup lines, or routines, or a pickup concept to work) - then the girl will feel exactly like the uncomfortable house guest, and you will feel like the uncomfortable host. What are some of the ways that YOU can start ENJOYING? Comments please. kick those shoes off! How to tap into your Deep Champion Lets smash right into this post. Im going to enlighten you a little on TRUE enjoyment. Inside all of us men there is a DEEP CHAMPION.
Underneath all the layers of social, external standards and THINGS - there is a CORE MAN, DEEP, DEEP underneath it all. WARNING: Im about to take you on a bit of a self discovery journey here. Now I am by no means what I call an aura-guy. I have trouble grasping anything too spiritual or airyfairy. Out there in clubs and bars, hitting up girls and having an awesome time doing it is where my true love lays. As always, I love practical stuff that you can go out and try immediately - but in this post I really want to illustrate where the true FLAWLESS NATURAL comes from and how he can be awakened within you, now. To start on this I need you to FORGET for a moment. Forget the game. Forget your job or circumstances. Forget what you look like or the clothes you have on. Forget the current physical shape you are in. Forget where you think your life is heading. Forget your friends and family. Just forget it all. All I need is you There is an old school zen saying that really struck a chord with me when I read it: NO ROOF OVER HEAD NO GROUND UNDER FEET NO ROOF OVER HEAD NO GROUND UNDER FEET Re-read the above until you connect with the core YOU. Imagine no roof, no sky, no anything above you - no ground to stand on, no earth below your feet. Just YOU, suspended in a VOID. This is where you connect to your DEEP CHAMPION. That man that is hidden deeply underneath the clutter of everyday life. This man has so much going for him:
- He has PURPOSE - He is HAPPY because he is ALIVE - He moves you in the direction of your bliss These are just some of the things your deep champion has going for you. Lets look at the first thing, becuase this has the most relation to what I want to talk about. He has PURPOSE. I want you to think back to your last couple of approaches. When you walk up to the girl, what is your PURPOSE? Is it to get better at the game? if so then WHY? Is it to get a girlfriend or have sex? if so then WHY? Is it to get better social skills? if so then WHY? Is it so you can bed 1000 women in a month? if so the WHY? Is it so you can have ultrasupercool game like Tim or Tyler or anyone else? WHY? What is your motivation? This question is at the root of all successful or unsuccessful pickups, PERIOD. Lets illustrate here with two guys, Sam and Ben - they are both pretty much the same looking, same physical shape and same clothes. They both like sports and are what you would call a regular dude. Sam has been learning pickup theory for a few months, he really wants to get good so he can show himself and his friends that he can get hot girls. He has never had a hot girlfriend and really wants one. Its a serious pain point in his life and he thinks about it constantly. One day he wants to be as good as pickup instructors or maybe even instruct himself in the future. Ben has also been learning pickup theory for quite some time. He has never had a hot girlfriend or even been with a hot girl. Every night he goes to sleep imagining the smell and touch of a beautiful girl. He daydreams about it constantly. He is deeply motivated by the adventure and sense of wonder in getting beautiful women. One day he wants to find that blissful relationship that he can feel deep inside. She is out there. Somewhere. Sam and Ben go to the same club, Paradiso on a Saturday night.
Sam is first to get inside with his buddies. He is prepared for battle. All night he has been thinking about his game. Tonight he feels ON. He cant really concentrate on his friends because he is scanning the club for the next target. Ben rolls up with his friends. He is joking around with his buddies and genuinely enjoying himself. In the back of his mind he is hoping to see some hot girls at the club, but is having fun anyway. About half an hour in, an absolute stunner, Anna, walks in with her friends. Sam sees her and his brain buzzes. She is a true HB10. He reels his mind for openers and chooses one and goes. He approaches HARD and taps her, reeling off his canned opener thats worked 1000 times before. She is a little stunned, but obliges with a response. Sam senses the vibe and goes for attraction. He busts on her about her body language to which she laughs. Sam decides now to go for phisical escalation. He puts his hand over her shoulder. Anna laughs and leaves it there but is wondering what this guy is doing. Sam starts telling Anna some stories and throwing some attract bits in there. He is thinking YES! my game is on FIRE tonight!. She seems to be enjoying the interaction. Sam goes in for the kiss She is caught a little off guard and tells Sam that she must go find her friends. Sam gets her number before she leaves to find her friends. Boom, solid number close Sam is stoked. About half an hour later Ben sees Anna up at the bar ordering a drink. He looks at her and is lovestruck. She hits him to his core. She has the perfect body, the right smile and the way she carries herself is immediately alluring to Ben. He imagines himself pulling her in tight and passionately making out with her. Ben is also thinking about HER enjoying HIM as much as he enjoys her. Ben knows he has to approach, despite of that fear creeping up inside his body. He must go now He focuses on Anna like a LAZER, driven deeply by a sense of manliness inside. If anything, he will enjoy talking to such a fine girl. He goes in STRONG Ben: Hey, Im ben. Anna:Oh hey. Im Anna Ben: Cool. Ya know, I was walking back to my friends, but I would KICK myself if I didnt come and meet you. Anna: haha. so where are you from? Ben instantley notices how good Anna smells. He quickly glances at her nice breasts tucked away behind a classy dress. His mind says God I want to have sex with this girl.
Ben is truely enjoying her. Every fibre of his BEING wants her. He is just EXCITED to be there in her presence. They throw back conversation with each other easily. He is not agreeing with everything she says quite the opposite, he is actually flirting with her on a number of random topics that come into his head. A little while later Annas friends come over to see where she is. Ben immediately introduces himself and has genuine interest in the friends, he pictures them as little cheerleaders for him and Anna hooking up. She is loving it. He is too. At a random rush of enjoyment Ben grabs the half full drink out of her hand and necks it. She hits him playfully. He snatches her hand and leads her to the dancefloor where he pulls her in tight to his chest. God she smells amazing. At the height of both of their enjoyment, he pulls her in closer so her cheek is lightly brushing his. They are both getting ultra turned on. She loves the way he is leading and going for her without barriers. He angles his neck so their lips come together smoothly and they start passionately making out. Time stands still. They feel like they are making out forever. Annas friends come and drag her to the bathroom. She tells Ben to wait by the dancefloor. His friends come up to chat him. Meanwhile in the bathroom the girls are giggling about how cute Ben is and how she should totally go with him tonight. Anna says she will see where it goes. Its getting late, so Ben decides as soon as she comes out of the bathroom to casually escort her out of the club back to his house. All the way to the cab and back to the house they are close, making out, laughing and just having a fun, light time together. Ben takes her to his room. He ravishes her the way he deeply knows how. She takes him with full enjoyment and ecstacy. What was the core difference between Sam and Ben? Their core motivation. From the start, Sam didnt even really know his motivation or intention. He was worried about his game and not even enjoying the girl in front of him. He put his arm around the girl in an attempt to get physical. But what for? It was what I call the PURPOSELESS HAND OF DOOM.
Seems like Sam was the purposeless MAN of doom. He had the wrong intentions. His movements were not dictaed by the CORE DEEP CHAMPION INSIDE. They were dictated by some external worldly standards. Anna felt it on some level. Something was Awry. If Sam called Anna, she would flake. Now Ben is in touch with his inner champion. His purpose: to ENJOY women and the adventure and beauty that accompanies them. He feels a deep passion for women. His understanding of women is not reliant upon mere pickup material - if the material doesnt gel with his deep, true champion - he doesnt even use it. So Ben wins. And, so does Anna. Natural Game - Approaching With The Lid Off Your Core Hello to you, Just got back from Santa Barbara, what a rad little town they have going there. Bummed I didnt get to see the nightlife but ahhh well. I want to discuss something very important to me right now. Ripping the lid off your core man inside. A lot of people watch programs about being a natural that are like 6 hours long with all sorts of attitude adjustments and subtleties, but what they remember is Approach by being yourself, without canned lines. They try it and it doesnt work right away, and then they get confused. This is because theyre understanding natural game IN REACTION to canned game, and looking at WHAT NATURAL GAME IS NOT rather than looking at WHAT IT IS. To make being a natural work, its not just about approaching with small talk, but with the lid off your core. Say you get a Flawless Natural opener, like Hey there, Im Barry. You get all pumped up (WOOO!), run over to the girl and deliver. She blows it off initially - so you go to the next girl, and the next, and the next. Whoa all these blowouts. I guess Natural Game does not work.
Listen up. Lets drill down to the core: When you see a honey, what is the VERY first thing that comes to your mind? - Ohhhhhh yum - She looks AWESOME - I would love to - YESSSS! - Damn she is FINE Or something like that. There is a split MILLISECOND when you lay your eyes on a girl that your TRUE MANLY CORE talks to you. He gives you the right direction. Now what happens after that first millisecond (most of the time)? The mind of doom kicks in: - Your not good enough - What line should you use? - Is your hair done good tonight? List goes on But that first MILLISECOND where your core opens up (the DAMN SHE IS HOT) is where the power lies. The core tells you to ENJOY a girl. To go up FREE from petty restraints such as exactly what to say. Sometimes I will blurt out things on my mind that have NOTHING to do with what we are talking about thats the lid off the core. Opening girls with dumb stuff or general things that are going on in your world RIGHT NOW thats the lid of the core. When the girl isnt acting favourable and you DONT CARE and just KEEP GOING because your are there not for her but as a CELEBRATION OF YOU thats the lid off the core. With the lid off your core, you ride an awesome WAVE of you. When you talk and act purely for your own enjoyment (but also to invite other people into your awesome world) you are coming from your core. So when you go up and try this flawless natural style go and FULLY put yourself out there. Instead of worrying about a girl opening up OPEN YOURSELF UP.
The examples and material that you see on my blog are simply Tim with the lid off his core. Take the lid off the core and let yourself ENJOY. nT Is she REALLY Higher Value? Something to think about for today: Be VERY careful of your assumptions. Back in the day when I was learning how to approach girls, I would read lot about the girl having HIGHER VALUE than the guy. I actually believed this for a long time. When you enter the bar or club or wherever, do you immediately assume the girls are better, cooler, have more status and are overall HIGHER than yourself? You silly, silly man. These are GIRLS. Our other halves. Wonderful things that are there for US. As soon as you assume higher value, you will PROJECT lower value through all your sub communications and boom - you ARE lower value. There is a lot of pickup material swirling around that is based upon this premise - GIRLS ARE HIGHER VALUE. The material says you should use tactics to either a. lower her value b. heighten your value When you are looking at getting a girl from this perspective: the whole focus of attraction becomes a big chess game of who has the most value, instead of being an awesome adventure that you passionately enjoy (and, in turn, she does too). Lets change our focus here. One of the components of the Flawless Natural method is the FLAWLESS ATTITUDE.
One of the key attidues that can really help you is starting to view women as EQUAL VALUE. She has cool stuff, you have cool stuff - lets blend the two. Another key attitude is to view everything in your life as cool. For example, I know guys who have great looks, lots of money and everything going for them but they arent EXCITED about it. They think their life is dull and are constantly chasing the next big thing. This produces NO GIRLS in their lives so they always thinking they are lacking. I also know dudes who have beat up cars, struggle to pay the rent and are shaggy fellows. They MAKE the things around them cool. My old beat up car I used to call the Chariot of love. So when I would talk to girls I would refer to the Chariot. The chariot was, actually, rubbish - but somehow by me naming it that and viewing it as a cool thing, it became cool. Over at my new videoblog, I talk about viewing people in the club not as obstacles but as CHEERLEADERS to your success. When you view the world through the flawless natural lens, attracting girls becomes inevitable. Much love nT
Sexual Framing is NOT about talking dirty to her. Although, you can talk dirty AND sexual frame at the same time. Sexual Framing is building an AGREEMENT on what the interaction between you and the girl IS/MEANS. You are building agreement that the interaction is of a SEXUAL nature. The best way to do this is to MAKE HER FEEL SEXY. The easiest way to make her feel sexy is to LET HER KNOW SHE IS HAVING A SEXUAL EFFECT ON YOU. (There are other ways, too.) Then, letting her know you FULLY INTEND to take action on it just by virtue of the interaction continuing! The longer the interaction continues the more REAL it should become to her that you are going to continue seducing her that sex IS on the horizon. Make her feel sexy. Let her know she is having an effect on you. Tell her you are losing control and you WILL act on it. It is disappointing for her to get all dressed up, get hit on all night and no one be man enough to guide her all the way in.
Very frustrating for her and cucumbers just dont do the trick.