Kristen Equals Feelings

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REBEL
Kristen Stewart on LGBT Rights, Generation Rx, and

Overcoming Heartbreak
The acclaimed actress sat down with Marlow Stern to discuss her new sci-fi film Equals, Kim
Davis, and the importance of giving in to emotion.
MARLOW STERN
09.13.15 6:55 AM ET
Not only is she really beautiful, but shes so vulnerable, says filmmaker Drake Doremus. You just love watching her. There
is a lot going on under the surface.
The director is gushing over the myriad talents of his star, Kristen Stewart, who not only holds a close-up better than just
about any other actress, but, due to the aforementioned emotional reservoir, possesses the uncanny ability to convey more
with a nod or shrug than most can with a 5-page monologue. And take it from Doremusthe man knows a thing or two about
talented actresses, having presided over a couple of then up-and-coming gals by the names of Felicity Jones and Jennifer
Lawrence in his sophomore feature Like Crazy.
Doremuss latest is Equals, which made its North American premiere at the Toronto International Film Festival. In it,
Stewart plays Nia, a young woman in a harmonious future society dubbed The Collective where everyone stalks about in
white Nehru suits, and emotions have been all but eradicated. Those who show emotions are dubbed Defects, and sent to
the infirmary to be killed. When her coworker Silas (Nicholas Hoult) falls in love with Nia, the two are forced to go on the run
or face termination.
Its a film that explores first love, and couldnt have come at a better time for Stewart and Hoult. Filming began in August
2014, and the pair of young stars had just come off a couple of very high-profile break-ups (Robert Pattinson and Jennifer
Lawrence, respectively).
It was incredibly painful, says Stewart, seated across from me at an empty nightclub in Downtown Toronto. Ugh, fucking
kill me. It was a really good time for both of us to make this movie. Not all of my friends have been through what Ive been
through, or what some people have tasted at a relatively-speaking young age, and we were not expected to do anything.
Everything that we did was explorative, and a meditation on what we already knew.
We all felt akin by how much weve been through, and to utilize that is so scary, she continued. And to acknowledge it,
reassess, and jump back into it? Usually you want to move on. But at least we could use some of that for some good. This
movie was a meditation on firsts, and a meditation on maintaining, and a meditation on the ebbs and flows of what its like to
love someoneyour feelings versus your ideals, the bursting of bubbles, the shattering of dreams you thought were possible,
and what you have to contend with as things get more realistic.
Relationships, she adds, you just never fucking know.
The Daily Beast spoke to Stewart, whose recent relationship has garnered plenty of ink, about the many messages of Equals,
and much more.
Dystopian films typically serve as interesting allegories. ForEquals, I saw it as a critique of Generation Rx,
and how, especially in America, teens are overprescribed and overmedicated. It seems, in many cases, like
a lazy catchall solution to dealing with young peoples inherent emotional volatility.
Oh, do you feel something? We can help you with that. Self-exploration goes out the door with medication. You go, Oh
god, I have a little stomachache, and they say, Here, we can help you with that. Well, why do you have that stomachache?
Maybe its because your heads in your stomach, so maybe theres something youre ignoring that you can work out. No, I
completely agree.
The film also struck me as being about the denial of love. This is an issue thats come to the fore in America
in a big way when you look at the gay rights movement, where, despite the Supreme Court decision
legalizing same-sex marriage, a large segment of the populationRepublicans, primarilystill believe that
the LGBT community should be denied the right to love. And denying anyone that basic human right can
drive people crazy.
Abso-fucking-lutely. It is crazy. Its weird because if youre overtly emotional about anything, people discredit what thought
you might be contributing, because anything overtly emotional can be viewed as a weakness. Its interesting what youre
saying about how now were trying to suppress emotions or irregularities with drugs and deem people controllable by meds,
because I think were more in tune and more honest with our emotions now than we have ever been. You think about your
grandparents or their grandparents, and you think about the patriarch of the family never showing emotionwith women,
too. As weve gotten past that, the meds have upped. Its bizarre. The two things dont really go together.
I wanted to go back to the issue of the denial of love. Have you been following the news of Kim Davis, the
Kentucky clerk who denied a same-sex couple their marriage license, was sent to jail, and has subsequently
been martyred by many on the right-wing?
Yeah. Oh my god. Did you see her come out of jail? Honestly, it makes me so deeply uncomfortable. I feel really bad for her.
Anyone whos so closed off to things that are so apparent? Imagine what else shes missing out on in life. Im not making any
grand statements about her personally, but if something so glaringly obvious, such as this subject
to have that much hate in your heart must be awful.
Thats why I feel bad for her. Its like, Oh, buddy, that must suck. That fear of the unknown cripples people, breeds hate,
and its just very sad.
Back to the Rx. Like you said, people may be in tune with their emotions, but perhaps theyre not being
explored. This isnt a new argument, but there seems to be a lack of intimacy these days. Were connected
by technology, but our actual human-to-human interaction has decreased dramatically. Were not asking
people for directions, were looking them up on our phone. And fucking selfie sticks! God forbid you stop
and ask someone to take your photograph.
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And its fitting that you shot this film in Japan, because theyre not even having sex anymore over there.
Nearly fifty percent of Japanese adults are not having sex, and theyre saying that if these trends continue,
the population could be halved by 2100.
Theyre not fucking. Thats crazy. You can assess a culture to a degree by the way they receive movies and how they receive a
given celebritylike me and Nick being that, I guess. So in Japan I can walk around the streets with no problem whatsoever
because nobody will come up to me, versus Italy where I cannot even take a step because everybody is trying to literally hug
and kiss and drag me down physically.
Ive spent some time in Italy with a girlfriend. They can be grabby over there.
Oh, theyre grabby. They are really grabby. Yeah, its weird. Its a good time to tell this story, I suppose, but I still think that
this fear of being subject to ones emotions has existed forever. But the medication aspect I find most interesting. I know a lot
of people on meds who dont have mental health issues. Not all emotional issues are mental health issues. They do not all
hold hands.
Im not saying this applies to everyone of course, but the friends I have whove gone off their meds for
things like depression and anxiety seem so much better. Theyre rawer emotionally, but more real.
Yeah. As far as we know, you have one shot at this and it can be so fucking beautiful, so why lessen the feeling of anything?
Why numb yourself? Im not on antidepressants. I think its bizarre.
SCOTT FREE PRODUCTIONS
There is the big first kiss scene in Equals, where you and Nick are in this blue-tinted bathroom stall and you
touchand then kissfor the first time to a swelling score. Since its a first kiss, was that hard to calibrate?
You cant make it seem expert, but you dont want to make it be like that Dumb & Dumber dream sequence,
either.
We had never done it! Our idea was that they had learned how conception happened in our history, but its a completely
unrelatable concept now, so kissing wasnt even in the textbook. Its tantamount to what you learn in middle school now
about how you conceive children. We wanted to make it look foreign, and found, and completely naturalbut new. Every
single really emotionally pivotal part of the movie Drake had infused with a certain bit of music that luckily we got into the
movie. Most actors use songs to make themselves cry.
Do you?
Actually, I dont. If Im really, really screwed and I need it, I do.
What music would you listen to in a situation like that to summon the tears?
Right now Have you seen Love & Mercy yet?

I loved it.
I fucking love that song [Love and Mercy]. I could think about it and start being emotional. It absolutely fucking annihilates
me. Its so simple, but considering what Brian Wilson had been through at that time, and for him to still be able to write that
song at that time given his environment and the people surrounding him was so full of hope.
RSA FILMS
Do you remember your first kiss?

Yes, absolutely! It was horrible! It was so bad. It was fucking repulsive. I was 14 and it was gross. It was not good. [Laughs]
But the first time something in you opens up and affects your entire body and has this control over you, its scary because
theres this chemical thats released that you become addicted to. It literally feels like you dont have free will anymore.
I know that fucking feeling. When I read the script, I was so intimidated by it because there are several awakenings that you
go through as a young personand Im sure there will be more as I get olderbut Ive had several eye-opening, come-toJesus moments. And I dont think that everyone is necessarily affected by or appreciates physical beauty, and I think we have
been desensitized to physical beauty because of the movies that we watch, and all the images that are thrust in our faces all
the time. We dont really appreciate the body, nature, a fucking sunrise.
You just easily close yourself off to certain things because you want to seem like you know it all, or youre not weakemotion
is often confused as weaknessso when emotions are undeniably physically affecting you, I think its a gift. People are so
good at turning that off, that we wanted to exemplify that in the most severe and basic senseand it was really scary.
You and Nick were both mining the emotions of first love by filming those sequences. Which, like you said,
is scary. But was it ultimately cathartic?
Yeah. It just could have been the cheesiest, most trite concept, but the whole attempt was to make that fresh again. If youve
been hurtyou know when youve broken up with someone and you look at someone walking down the street holding hands
and think, Ugh, give it a fuckin year. Let me know how you feel in a year, ugh, I dont believe in that, well if we did our jobs
right, then it would be to remind you that you can definitely get back to that, and how hard, amazing, and life-fulfilling those
feelings were in the very beginning.

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TRISTAN FEWINGS/GETTY IMAGES

Kristen Stewart on LGBT Rights, Generation Rx, and

GET THE BEAST IN YOUR INBOX!

Were getting to this neutralized, disconnected world.

SCOTT FREE PRODUCTIONS

Right now Have you seen Love & Mercy yet?

Do you remember your first kiss?

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