The forty rules of love

Rule 1
How we see God is a direct reflection of how we see ourselves. If God brings
to mind mostly fear and blame, it means there is too much fear and blame
welled inside us. If we see God as full of love and compassion, so are we.
Rule 2
The path to the Truth is a labour of the heart, not of the head. Make your heart
your primary guide! Not your mind. Meet, challenge and ultimately prevail over
your nafs with your heart. Knowing your ego will lead you to the knowledge of
God.
Rule 3
You can study God through everything and everyone in the universe, because
God is not confined in a mosque, synagogue or church. But if you are still in
need of knowing where exactly His abode is, there is only one place to look
for him: in the heart of a true lover.
Rule 4
Intellect and love are made of different materials. Intellect ties people in knots
and risks nothing, but love dissolves all tangles and risks everything. Intellect
is always cautious and advices, Beware too much ecstasy, whereas love
says, Oh, never mind! Take the plunge! Intellect does not easily break down,
whereas love can effortlessly reduce itself to rubble. But treasures are hidden
among ruins. A broken heart hides treasures.
Rule 5
Most of problems of the world stem from linguistic mistakes and simple
misunderstanding. Dont ever take words at face value. When you step into
the zone of love, language, as we know it becomes obsolete. That which
cannot be put into words can only be grasped through silence.

Rule 6
Loneliness and solitude are two different things. When you are lonely, it is
easy to delude yourself into believing that you are on the right path. Solitude
is better for us, as it means being alone without feeling lonely. But eventually
it is the best to find a person who will be your mirror. Remember only in
another persons heart can you truly see yourself and the presence of God
within you.
Rule 7
Whatever happens in your life, no matter how troubling things might seem, do
not enter the neighbourhood of despair. Even when all doors remain closed,
God will open up a new path only for you. Be thankful! It is easy to be thankful
when all is well. A Sufi is thankful not only for what he has been given but also
for all that he has been denied.
Rule 8
Patience does not mean to passively endure. It means to look at the end of a
process. What does patience mean? It means to look at the thorn and see the
rose, to look at the night and see the dawn. Impatience means to be
shortsighted as to not be able to see the outcome. The lovers of God never
run out of patience, for they know that time is needed for the crescent moon to
become full.
Rule 9
East, west, south, or north makes little difference. No matter what your
destination, just be sure to make every journey a journey within. If you travel
within, youll travel the whole wide world and beyond.
Rule 10
The midwife knows that when there is no pain, the way for the baby cannot be
opened and the mother cannot give birth. Likewise, for a new self to be born,

hardship is necessary. Just as clay needs to go through intense heat to

become strong, Love can only be perfected in pain.
Rule 11
The quest for love changes user. There is no seeker among those who search
for love who has not matured on the way. The moment you start looking for
love, you start to change within and without.
Rule 12
There are more fake gurus and false teachers in this world than the number of
stars in the visible universe. Dont confuse power-driven, self-centered people
with true mentors. A genuine spiritual master will not direct your attention to
himself or herself and will not expect absolute obedience or utter admiration
from you, but instead will help you to appreciate and admire your inner self.
True mentors are as transparent as glass. They let the light of God pass
through them.
Rule 13
Try not to resist the changes, which come your way. Instead let life live
through you. And do not worry that your life is turning upside down. How do
you know that the side you are used to is better than the one to come?
Rule 14
God is busy with the completion of your work, both outwardly and inwardly.
He is fully occupied with you. Every human being is a work in progress that is
slowly but inexorably moving toward perfection. We are each an unfinished
work of art both waiting and striving to be completed. God deals with each of
us separately because humanity is fine art of skilled penmanship where every
single dot is equally important for the entire picture.
Rule 15
Its easy to love a perfect God, unblemished and infallible that He is. What is
far more difficult is to love fellow human being with all their imperfections and

defects. Remember, one can only know what one is capable of loving. There
is no wisdom without love. Unless we learn to love Gods creation, we can
neither truly love nor truly know God.
Rule 16
Real faith is the one inside. The rest simply washes off. There is only one type
of dirt that cannot be cleansed with pure water, and that is the stain of hatred
and bigotry contaminating the soul. You can purify your body through
abstinence and fasting, but only love will purify your heart.
Rule 17
The whole universe is contained within a single human being-you. Everything
that you see around, including the things that you might not be fond of and
even the people you despise or abhor, is present within you in varying
degrees. Therefore, do not look for Sheitan outside yourself either. The devil
is not an extraordinary force that attacks from without. It is an ordinary voice
within. If you set to know yourself fully, facing with honesty and hardness.
Rule 18
If you want to change the ways others treat you, you should first change the
way you treat yourself, fully and sincerely, there is no way you can be loved.
Once you achieve that stage, however, be thankful for every thorn that others
might throw at you. It is a sign that you will soon be showered in roses.
Rule 19
Fret not where the road will take you. Instead concentrate on the first step.
That is the hardest part and that is what you are responsible for. Once you
take that step let everything do what it naturally does and the rest will follow.
Dont go with the flow. Be the flow.
Rule 20
We were all created in His image, and yet we were each created different and
unique. No two people are alike. No hearts beat to the same rhythm. If God

had wanted everyone to be the same, He would have made it so. Therefore,
disrespecting differences and imposing your thoughts on others is an amount
to disrespecting Gods holy scheme.
Rule 21
When a true lover of God goes into a tavern, the tavern becomes his chamber
of prayer, but when a wine bibber goes into the same chamber, it becomes
his tavern. In everything we do, it is our hearts that make the difference, not
our outer appearance. Sufis do not judge other people on how they look or
who they are. When a Sufi stares at someone, he keeps both eyes closed
instead opens a third eye the eye that sees the inner realm.
Rule 22
Life is a temporary loan and this world is nothing but a sketchy imitation of
Reality. Only children would mistake a toy for the real thing. And yet human
beings either become infatuated with the toy or disrespectfully break it and
throw it aside. In this life stay away from all kinds of extremities, for they will
destroy your inner balance. Sufis do not go to extremes. A Sufi always
remains mild and moderate.
Rule 23
The human being has a unique place among Gods creation. I breathed into
him of My Spirit, God says. Each and every one of us without exception is
designed to be Gods delegate on earth. Ask yourself, just how often do you
behave like a delegate, if you ever do so? Remember, it fells upon each of us
to discover the divine spirit inside and live by it.
Rule 24
Hell is in the here and now. So is heaven. Quit worrying about hell or
dreaming about heaven, as they are both present inside this very moment.
Every time we fall in love, we ascend to heaven. Every time we hate, envy or
fight someone we tumble straight into the fires of hell.

Rule 25
Each and every reader comprehends the Holy Quran on a different level of
tandem with the depth of his understanding. There are four levels of insight.
The first level is the outer meaning and it is the one that the majority of the
people are content with. Next is the Batin the inner level. Third, there is the
inner of the inner. And the fourth level is so deep it cannot be put into words
and is therefore bound to remain indescribable.
Rule 26
The universe is one being. Everything and everyone is interconnected through
an invisible web of stories. Whether we are aware of it or not, we are all in a
silent conversation. Do no harm. Practice compassion. And do not gossip
behind anyones back not even a seemingly innocent remark! The words
that come out of our mouths do not vanish but are perpetually stored in infinite
space and they will come back to us in due time. One mans pain will hurt us
all. One mans joy will make everyone smile.
Rule 27
Whatever you speak, good or evil, will somehow come back to you.
Therefore, if there is someone who harbours ill thoughts about you, saying
similarly bad things about him will only make matters worse. You will be
locked in a vicious circle of malevolent energy. Instead for forty days and
nights say and think nice things about that person. Everything will be different
at the end of 40 days, because you will be different inside.
Rule 28
The past is an interpretation. The future is on illusion. The world does not
more through time as if it were a straight line, proceeding from the past to the
future. Instead time moves through and within us, in endless spirals. Eternity
does not mean infinite time, but simply timelessness. If you want to

experience eternal illumination, put the past and the future out of your mind
and remain within the present moment.

Rule 29
Destiny doesnt mean that your life has been strictly predetermined.
Therefore, to live everything to the fate and to not actively contribute to the
music of the universe is a sign of sheer ignorance. The music of the universe
is all pervading and it is composed on 40 different levels. Your destiny is the
level where you play your tune. You might not change your instrument but
how well to play is entirely in your hands.
Rule 30
The true Sufi is such that even when he is unjustly accused, attacked and
condemned from all sides, he patiently endures, uttering not a sing bad word
about any of his critics. A Sufi never apportions blame. How can there be
opponents or rivals or even others when there is no self in the first place?
How can there be anyone to blame when there is only One?
Rule 31
If you want to strengthen your faith, you will need to soften inside. For your
faith to be rock solid, your heart needs to be as soft as a feather. Through an
illness, accident, loss or fright, one way or another, we are all faced with
incidents that teach us how to become less selfish and judgmental and more
compassionate and generous. Yet some of us learn the lesson and manage
to become milder, while some others end up becoming even harsher than
before
Rule 32
Nothing should stand between you and God. No imams, priests, rabbits or
any other custodians of moral or religious leadership. Not spiritual masters
and not even your faith. Believe in your values and your rules, but never lord
them over others. If you keep breaking other peoples hearts, whatever

religious duty you perform is no good. Stay away from all sorts of idolatry, for
they will blur your vision. Let God and only God be your guide. Learn the
Truth, my friend, but be careful not to make a fetish out of your truths.

Rule 33
While everyone in this world strives to get somewhere and become someone,
only to leave it all behind after death, you aim for the supreme stage of
nothingness. Live this life as light and empty as the number zero. We are no
different from a pot. It is not the decorations outside but the emptiness inside
that holds us straight. Just like that, it is not what we aspire to achieve but the
consciousness of nothingness that keeps us going.
Rule 34
Submission does not mean being weak or passive. It leads to neither fatalism
nor capitulation. Just the opposite. True power resides in submission a power
that comes within. Those who submit to the divine essence of life will live in
unperturbed tranquillity and peace even the whole wide world goes through
turbulence after turbulence.
Rule 35
In this world, it is not similarities or regularities that take us a step forward, but
blunt opposites. And all the opposites in the universe are present within each
and every one of us. Therefore the believer needs to meet the unbeliever
residing within. And the nonbeliever should get to know the silent faithful in
him. Until the day one reaches the stage of Insane-I Kamil, the perfect human
being, faith is a gradual process and one that necessitates its seeming
opposite: disbelief.
Rule 36
This world is erected upon the principle of reciprocity. Neither a drop of
kindness nor a speck of evil will remain unreciprocated. For not the plots,
deceptions, or tricks of other people. If somebody is setting a trap, remember,

so is God. He is the biggest plotter. Not even a leaf stirs outside Gods
knowledge. Simply and fully believe in that. Whatever God does, He does it
beautifully.

Rule 37
God is a meticulous dock maker. So precise is His order that everything on
earth happens in its own time. Neither a minute late nor a minute early. And
for everyone without exception, the clock works accurately. For each there is
a time to love and a time to die.
Rule 38
It is never too late to ask yourself, Am I ready to change the life I am living?
Am I ready to change within? Even if a single day in your life is the same as
the day before, it surely is a pity. At every moment and with each new breath,
one should be renewed and renewed again. There is only one-way to be born
into a new life: to die before death.
Rule 39
While the part change, the whole always remains the same. For every thief
who departs this world, a new one is born. And every descent person who
passes away is replaced by a new one. In this way not only does nothing
remain the same but also nothing ever really changes. For every Sufi who
dies, another is born somewhere.
Rule 40
A life without love is of no account. Dont ask yourself what kind of love you
should seek, spiritual or material, divine or mundane, Eastern or Western.
Divisions only lead to more divisions. Love has no labels, no definitions. It is
what it is, pure and simple. Love is the water of life. And a lover is a soul of
fire! The universe turns differently when fire loves water.