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CAE Writing Model Before Correction
CAE Writing Model Before Correction
In this essay, an attempt will be made to discuss whether or not early retirement should Commented [LRS1]: Page Layout (fara aliniat)
be a thing nowadays, as such I will be providing both the favorable and deplorable things that
come with the statement and also end up by giving my own opinion regarding the matter at hand.
Let us begin by discussing why the matter at hand is a well-pronounced thing to do and
the first argument that struck to me was the fact that younger people can’t enter the workforce if Commented [LRS2]: Struck me
older people stay too long in their jobs, this motive stands for itself, it needs no further Commented [LRS3]: cannot
explanation due to the fact that it’s as true as it gets, younger people do need to work for their Commented [LRS4]: it is
own survival while the older ones have pensions that are going to keep them going. Another Commented [LRS5]: mergea un Moreover, pentru ca pui
alta idee
statement that has been made was that older people do not have the same energy as younger
people have, as such early retirement already sounds like a fine idea, let alone the fact that older
people would be happier without the stress and the dire straits that come with a week of work,
therefore improving their own health.
In contrast to the points stated above, there are quite some down-sides addressed at the Commented [LRS6]: to
proposal. Such as the fact that with such high life expectancy how do we expect older people to
support themselves if the retirement would be made at the age of 55, one motive that this Commented [LRS7]: fara made
proposal should not get through, but is it a strong enough point? That remains to be seen as I’m Commented [LRS8]: I am
now going to present the second motive and that’s the fact that for most people, giving away Commented [LRS9]: motive, namely, the fact that ...
their carrier would mean giving away their own life, another bold statement that should be taken
into consideration when deciding whether or not the proposal should be getting through, not to
mention the fact that older workers do have invaluable experience and skills that younger people
simply do not.
To sum up the essay, I’m going to say that I’m with this proposal, compulsory Commented [LRS10]: prea informal....it is my view
that....
retirements should be made at the age of 55, with that said, I do think that older people should
live in a catbird seat for the rest of their life, as such I would like to ask for a raise in their
pension while we are at it, just so it’s going to be a win-win situation and so that people are Commented [LRS11]: it is