Professional Documents
Culture Documents
On Nadine
On Nadine
I. Introduction
The 23-year-old actress Nadine Lustre has been in hot seat by many commentators in her
response to a reporter when asked if she was already living-in with her one-year boyfriend, James
Reid. As the interview went on, she casually remarked, “If that was true, so what? Di ba, it’s not
new anymore. Come on guys, it’s 2017. Let’s all be open-minded.” Lustre didn’t confirm if the
speculation was true or not but it implicitly made an impact to her audience (Sakurako “Nadine
Lustre’s Cohabitation” n.pag.).
“So what?”, as she said. For Lustre, cohabiting1 is ordinary these days and it’s what people
are doing (ibid.). This response fueled so many reactions even to millennials. Some agreed that
cohabitation isn’t a good idea just because it’s popular and some sided with Lustre, saying that
there is nothing wrong with living together before getting married.
In this paper, the researcher dwells on what the Church teaches regarding the case on
cohabitation. Furthermore, the study presents a theological evaluation vis-à-vis living-in together.
1
A situation where "a couple has been living together as husband and wife (having sexual relations) without getting
married." (National Conference of Catholic Bishops Committee for Pastoral Research and Practices, Faithful to
Each Other Forever: A Catholic Handbook of Pastoral Help for Marriage Preparation. Washington, D.C.: U.S.
Catholic Conference, 71).
2
marriages, which is why She discourages couples from cohabitating for the reason that it can have
a profoundly damaging impact on relationships.
However, a couple is free to remain ignorant with the Church’s teachings. But if they come
to receive the sacrament of matrimony, they must be willing to conform themselves to what the
Church stance about this sacrament. In this section, the researcher will now present the Church’s
teachings regarding cohabitation.
The Catechism specifically mentions fornication as a sin, and the Church has traditionally
taught that it is a mortal sin. This teaching can be traced in St. Paul’s teaching that fornication is a
sin that can keep a person in inheriting the kingdom of God (NRSV Cor. 6:9).
3
The Catholic Church believes that true joy comes from God. In that light, the only way a
sexual relationship can bring such joy is if it is undertaken by a man and woman who have brought
God into it through the sacrament of marriage (Eden “10 1/2 Reasons to be Chaste” n.pag.). Thus,
in the next section, the value of a chaste life must be taken in consideration.
Those who are engaged to marry are called to live chastity in continence. They should see
in this time of testing a discovery of mutual respect, an apprenticeship in fidelity, and the
hope of receiving one another from God. They should reserve for marriage the expression
of affection that belongs to married love. They will help each other grow in chastity. (CCC
2350)
A couple obtains a healthy marriage through the value of chastity. Through chastity, sexual
appetite is in control rather than being in control of the couple. For this reason, chastity needs to
be developed and appreciated even before marriage (Lowery 15).
Furthermore, CCC describes chastity as the successful integration of sexuality within the
person and thus the inner unity of a human being in his or her bodily and spiritual being (CCC
2337). Thus, the person who developed the value of chastity is a person who is well ordered from
within and is not driven away by the sexual urges (Kansas Bishops “Cohabitation Before
Marriage” n.pag.).
Marriage is more than a civil contract. It is the only place in which a life-long commitment
with one another is established. By saying “I do” during the wedding rite is tantamount in saying
that one is giving all of himself/herself to him/her. Through marriage, the couples seal their love
and commitment through sexual union. Sex, therefore, is not a recreational activity but a total
giving of oneself (USCCB “Married Love and the Gift of Life”).
The Catholic church teaches that marriage is a Christian vocation. It involves a call from
God and a response from two people who promised to build a life-long intimate relationship of
love and life (“The Vocation of Marriage” n.pag.). In Amoris Laetitia, Pope Francis writes:
The Church teaches that the call to marriage is a call to self-giving love. This call is
deepened into conviction and commitment. Couples obtaining the sacrament of marriage must be
ready to learn what their vocation means and must acquire the virtues needed for a happy and holy
marriage. The vocation is a call to holiness and service with one another.
into the marriage life. With this kind of attitude, their marriage will likely achieve stability and
happiness (Lowery 16).
It is suggested that Nadine and James should not cohabitate to stop the temptation of an
uncontrolled sexual desire. Sex should be saved for marriage where the deepest intimacy is
supposed to be (17).
IV. Conclusion/Recommendation
In this case, if Nadine and James are planning to get married they need to believe what the
Church teaches. It is recommended that pastoral ministers encourage the couple to separate so that
they can value the gift of chastity. The priest should make sure to point out the good reasons not
to cohabit and catechize them with the teachings of the Church. Thus this event is an opportunity
of evangelization and catechesis. To help couple understand the vision of Catholic marriage.
If Nadine and James want to marry, the goal of marriage preparation is to create an
awareness of the essential characteristics of Christian marriage which is chastity, fidelity and the
importance of sacramental grace that unites the couple to the love of Christ (“Preparation for the
Sacrament of Marriage” 45). Additionally, Nadine and James, if ever they succumb to
cohabitation, are encouraged to reflect and rethink on the different circumstances of their
relationship, especially its moral and spiritual dimensions.
The Church is a vanguard of her teachings and doctrines. She has to assert her stand
especially on matters of faith and morals, but in doing so, she remains to be a living sacrament of
the enduring mercy of God. She deals with every person – saints and sinners alike – with so much
care and respect. She certainly would not condemn the sinner, rather, she provides avenues for
conversion and renewal of heart and mind . . .hence, the Church supports the future endeavors of
any couple and provides assistance so that they can live the vocation of a Christian marriage
(“Marriage Preparation and Cohabiting Couples” np.).
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Works Cited
Buber, Martin. Between Man and Man. Trans. Ronald Gregor-Smith New York: Paragon House,
1947.
Dawn Eden. The Thrill of the Chaste: Finding Fulfillment While Keeping Your Clothes On. USA:
Thomas Nelson, 2006.
Kansas Bishops, Cohabitation Before Marriage. Washington: CNS Documentary Service, 2017.
[
“Living Together: Questions and Answers Regarding Cohabitation and the Church's Moral
Teaching”.
http://www.catholicnewsagency.com/resources/life-and-family/marriage/cohabitation-
and-churchs-teaching/.
Lowery, Mark. Chastity Before Marriage: A Fresh Perspective. California. The Catholic Faith,
1998.
“Marriage Preparation in the Catholic Church: Getting It Right.”
http://www.usccb.org/issues-and-action/marriage-and-family/marriage/marriage-
preparation/cohabiting.cfm.
National Conference of Catholic Bishops Committee for Pastoral Research and Practices, Faithful
to Each Other Forever: A Catholic Handbook of Pastoral Help for Marriage Preparation.
Washington, D.C.: U.S. Catholic Conference.
The Holy Bible: New Revised Standard Version. New York: Oxford University, 1996.