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Create Remarkable Success PDF
Create Remarkable Success PDF
Remarkable Success
Discover Your Strengths, Forge Your Own Path, and Build The Life You Want
Find Your Main Intelligence Type
By Zoe McKey
[email protected]
Table of Contents
Introduction
Chapter 1: What is success?
Chapter 2: A brief history of intelligence development
Chapter 3: Multiple intelligence theory
Chapter 4: Linguistic and verbal intelligence
Chapter 5: Logical-mathematical intelligence
Chapter 6: Visual-spatial intelligence
Chapter 7: Body - movement intelligence
Chapter 8: Musical intelligence
Chapter 9: Interpersonal intelligence
Chapter 10: Intrapersonal intelligence
Chapter 11: Naturalist intelligence
Chapter 12: Existential intelligence
Chapter 13: How to discover your strengths?
Chapter 14: What’s your main intelligence type? How can you make a living from it?
Chapter 15: How do you change your “dark side?”
Chapter 16: Happiness is a decision
Provisions for your journey…
Introduction
Two years ago I met a man who, in the literal sense of the word, was very successful. He was a
recognized expert in his industry, rich, and deeply, utterly unhappy. Back then I was working fourteen
hours a day from Monday through Saturday and I was irritated by his bad attitude.
- Poor rich guy, what does he know about struggle? He doesn’t know what to do with his
own good fortune…
But after my bitterness disappeared, I had some other interesting thoughts. I hate my job, but I
struggle for money in the hope that it will make me happy. This guy clearly has money but not
happiness. He hates his job just like me, and he suffers just like me. There must be something else out
there. What is the key to happiness? Since it isn’t money or success.
What is it?
After some thought, I concluded that a Richie Rich’s problem was that he hated his work. He didn’t
find any value in it. I knew he was a passionate cook, but he’d never tried it professionally. I was
convinced that if he followed his passion he’d be a happy man.
Not long after that, I met a woman who was a fire dancer. She loved it. When she was dancing her face
glowed. When I went to congratulate her after an amazing performance, she told me sadly, “Yes, I
love doing it, but I was kicked out of my apartment because I can’t pay my bill. I can’t make a living
from fire dancing, because…” And she proceeded to tell me all the reasons fire dancing was NOT
profitable.
I was confused, what’s wrong with people? If you earn money doing something you hate, then you’re
unhappy. If you do something you love, you die of hunger and are also unhappy. What is the solution?
How can a person be successful AND happy? Where is the thin ice that doesn’t break if you step on it
and walk to a life worth living?
There are three factors a person should possess in order to achieve success and happiness:
Passion – for happiness
Skill – for success
Usefulness – for money
The ideas in this book changed my life and drove me to write this book and share them with others.
The book will show you how to find happiness by answering the three questions above. What is your
passion? What are you the best at? How can you earn money doing it?
In my research, I was initially touched by Professor Howard Gardner ’s multiple intelligence theory.
This theory triggered a lot of discussion, but one thing is true: whether we consider these intelligence
types to be skills, talents, or literal intelligence types, they influence our lives greatly and are a crucial
factor in individual development and happiness.
But I don’t want to spoil everything, read this book and find the answers for yourself!
Chapter 1: What is success?
Success means something different to me, to you, and to the other seven billion people living on the
Earth. Some of us aim higher; some of us are satisfied with less. Some people seek money; some
people seek love or appreciation. Some want it all at once.
If animals have a survival instinct, we can say that humans have a “success instinct.” The drive for
success pushes us forward, keeps us in motion, helps us create incredible things. We always want
more. This is why when we complete a task we are not satisfied for long but instead think of the next
step and how we can do more.
Have you given any thought to why some people are more successful than others? Why they are
happier, richer, and more free.
Those who don’t have goals in life are sadder, pessimistic, always depressed, and often angry. Mental
and physical illnesses can attack this kind of person more easily.
There is a group between the super-happy, rich and active minority, and the passive majority. There
are people who have goals, who even achieve some successes, but are not happy and their lives don’t
seem to move from point A to point B. These people put a lot of effort into what they do, but hardly
ever find the fulfillment they’re looking for. This is mostly because of their jobs.
We spend most of our adult lives working on something. We go to our workplace at least five days a
week. If we do something we hate, dislike, or simply feel apathetic about, all five days of our week
will be stressful, unhappy or, in the best case, mediocre.
Is this success? Is this a life lived to the fullest?
My dear reader, now you must be thinking: this is not so simple, I can’t change now, I’m too old, or
what does the author know about me?
As someone who had to “borrow” food from her dorm’s common fridge to survive, who had to wash
blood vessels in a butchery, who worked as a car tire loader in a factory, but eventually became a
translator and then a full-time writer and social development coach, I can honestly say it is possible to
change. With little money in my account, I made a risky decision, but I knew what I wanted. Thanks to
the bad jobs, I knew what I didn’t want to do long term. So I changed my life – and I tell you I’ve
never been happier or lived better.
Yesterday (Sunday), I had a conversation with an old friend. She asked what I was doing. I answered
that I was working. She replied, “Oh poor you, that must be so awful to have to work on the
weekend.” And when I heard that sentence a divine spark hit me. No, on the contrary, it is so awesome!
I’m blessed; I am happy; I love to do what I’m doing! Her negative response only helped increase my
awareness of my blissful situation. I could have easily chosen to not do anything on Sunday, but I
wanted to write this book for you. I was so inspired that I couldn’t think of a more enjoyable Sunday
activity.
My point is that it matters what you spend your days doing. In the end I got a good job as a decently
paid translator. And I was good. People liked my style. I ended up being the personal simultaneous
translator for the general manager of a multinational company. I don’t mean to brag; I just want to
make it clear that I had a good job. But I wasn’t happy, and I left it without regret.
The trigger for my personal change was a book called Frames of Mind: The theory of multiple
intelligences by Howard Gardner. In this book the professor presents his theory of multiple
intelligences (verbal, logical, intrapersonal, interpersonal, musical, spatial, kinesthetic, naturalist, and
existential). It was the first time I had thought about my strengths? I thought about what I love doing
the most, what gives me passion, and what I could easily do long-term (the next sixty years for
instance).
Soon another question followed: would the activity I chose bring me success? Did I have enough
knowledge to start it?
There has never been an easier time to follow your dreams. Thanks to technology so much
information is available to broaden your knowledge in any field. We can develop any skill or
intelligence. We live in a world of possibilities.
I am a huge fan of Brian Tracy. I love the guy. One of his sentences inspired me to dig deeper in
finding a correlation between the multiple intelligence types and success. This was the sentence:
- “It was proven that there is no correlation between success and intelligence, appearance,
literacy and connections. In some cases they are helpful, but no direct connection can be
found.”
Quite counterintuitive, right? However his sentence sparked a challenge in me to find the strongest
connection and closest correlation between success and these intelligence types.
Intelligence is influenced by behavior, thus, with study and practice, thoughts and mindset can be
improved. And if we choose the right path to invest in and to develop, the limit of our ability is the
starry sky.
What is the right path? Is it something our parents want us to do? Is it something society pushes us to
do? Is it something that brings us a lot of money?
Or, is it something that gives us a reason to wake up every day, a reason to go for it, to learn and
enjoy work without considering it a burden? Is it something we feel a constant passion for? Does
doing it fill us with a deep feeling of contentment and a strong sense of growth? Is it something we
feel we were born to do?
Are you a passionate cook, but think it is an impossible way to make a living? Ask Gordon Ramsey if
he makes a decent living.
Do you wake up and go to sleep with melodies in your head? Could you play the piano before you
could write? Did your parents always tell you music was for hobos and you’d never be able to pay
your bills from it? Ask Celine Dion if she can pay her bills.
You always dreamed of being a world famous sport star, but people considered your dreams
ridiculous. Ask Diego Maradona if his dreams were ridiculous.
If it was possible for them, why isn’t it for you? Never let another ’s defeatist approach bring you
down! If you have a calling, go for it! Do it! Believe in yourself!
How do you believe in yourself? By constantly proving those who say you can’t do it wrong, AND by
constantly proving yourself right by saying, “YES, I CAN DO IT!”
How do you do that? By doing something you are passionate about, something you have a talent for,
something that calls you like flowers call the bees. If you have a day-by-day confirmation in the form
of a small or big success, you will never feel you’re heading the wrong way. In small successes you
can understand anything. Go for a walk instead of watching TV, drink water instead of coke, throw
out the useless stuff from your wardrobe. If any of these actions bring you a closer to your goal then
they are immense steps forward.
The point of this book is neither to convince you to resign your highly paid job today, nor to follow a
raw, instinctual calling and leave the rest behind. My aim is to teach you the main areas of
intelligence, and personal development. The point of this book is:
to get you thinking about your strongest innate abilities that you could build to the expert
level,
to give practical advice on how to improve these innate abilities,
to help you improve the weaker intelligences you’d like to be better at,
to give you the kick you need to go out of your comfort zone and do something that fills
your happiness tank,
and to educate you on the latest intelligence research.
This book approaches success like no other has before. In reading it you have nothing to lose and
everything to gain.
Let’s start this journey!
Chapter 2: A brief history of intelligence development
We were, and still are, part of nature. Historically, humans were not on the top of the food chain. They
had to fight to stay alive. And these fights weren’t simple ones. But the acquisition of food, the race
preservation, and the fight to stay alive slowly began to rise from the instinctual level to the conscious
level.
When the first anthropoid climbed down from the tree and discovered primitive tools, human
civilization started to distinguish itself from other species. And how far were we from iPhones and
rocket science?
One Stone Age ancestor threw a rock and acknowledged with interest how fast that rock traveled the
distance between him and his prey. He realized that throwing rocks was much better than sticks to hunt
a running, jumping, or flying animal.
Our ancestors slowly began to develop different kinds of weapons for attacking, for protection, and
for household use. The roots of intelligence awakened in their brains. They figured out that working
in team increased the chances of making a successful hunt. More rocks equaled more possibilities.
Rudimentary teamwork, right?
They had already begun to study human qualities even back then. Who is the fastest runner? Who is
the most accurate rock thrower? Who is the slowest? Who is the one they had to be faster than to not
end up in the stomach of a beast?
Our ancestors also found “special” people they shared between their communities. These people
could explain unfamiliar natural phenomena (were good in verbal, logical, and interpersonal
intelligence) and became tribal shamans. To lead it was essential to have physical power, courage,
speed, awareness, and persuasion skills (kinesthetic, logical, verbal, spatial intelligence). A good
hunter had to be fast, know how to read tracks, had to throw accurately (physical, logical, spatial
intelligence). Some were good in imitating animal sounds (musical intelligence), and I could go on
and on with the examples.
Everything can be measured nowadays, even intelligence. The measurement of intelligence started to
be taken more seriously in the second half of the 1800s. In the beginning, researchers measured how
quickly the subject responded to certain external stimuli. The reaction time, or quick reflexes, were
not strongly connected with for example results achieved in school.
Sir Francis Galton was the first person to create a test to measure intellectual abilities. In 1884, he
wanted to prove that British scientific greats and normal citizens could be separated into groups based
on the size of their heads. The parameters tested were auditory threshold, reaction time, and visual
acuity. The test didn’t prove to be successful. Based on the criterion above, no significant difference
could be made between a genius and a normal citizen.
Researchers dug deeper and developed more comprehensive tests. Based on the answers given they
could rank subjects at different levels. With this new system they could decide how many years ahead
or behind a child was in his or her subjects. Each person was ranked with above, below, or average
qualities. Mental age appeared as a concept. And it was measurable.
Alfred Binet, a French psychologist also thought there was a correlation between the size of the brain
and intelligence, however no significant evidence proved it. The size of the human brain is not
proportional to intelligence.
The first intelligence test appeared in the beginning of the 20th century and it was called the Binet-
Simon scale. In the years that followed, it went through a lot of changes and corrections. The test was
adapted to the new understandings revealed in intelligence research. William Stern introduced the
intelligence quotient as a concept first in 1912.
IQ is calculated by dividing mental age by real age and multiplying by 100.
The Stanford-Binet test was used in 1916 at Stanford University as the first large-scale, representative
sample IQ measurement. Since then professionals have specifically applied it to all areas of life.
It is important to mention another variable, which measures the correlation among different cognitive
tasks. Proposed by English psychologist Charles Spearman, this variable is called the g factor.
Spearman initially researched a group of elementary school children who performed seemingly
unrelated school subjects like math, literature, and music. He discovered that some subjects were in
fact positively related. Children who did great on literature tests, tended to do well on math tests also.
Some who failed one type of test had a high probability of failing another type as well.
Following this thread, Spearman concluded that mental performance could be conceived as a single
universal ability factor, which he called g. This was followed by a large number of smaller, task-
specific ability factors.
Today’s model looks like a family tree with three levels and g factor at the apex as the variable for all
cognitive tasks. A level lower there are eight, more general factors such as fluid intelligence (Gf),
crystallized intelligence (Gc), broad visual perception (Gv), and others. The third level consists of a
large number of narrow factors.
However, this g factor theory has been questioned by a handful of psychologists. One of them was the
gentleman I mentioned in Chapter 1, Howard Gardner, who came up with the multiple intelligence
theory. This theory is based on the thesis of uncorrelated abilities.
I will present an overview of the multiple intelligence theory in the next chapters. In fact, I’ve based
my entire book on Gardner ’s idea. Although he’s been criticized over the years, one fact is true. The
different areas of intelligence are vital parts of each individual’s personal development. I think it is
very important for us to recognize the areas in which we excel and those areas we need to improve.
Let’s explore the pros and cons in Gardner ’s theory.
Chapter 3: Multiple intelligence theory
The human brain is complex. I won’t go into the details; I’ll leave that for super-scientific anatomy
books. I will briefly mention the main differences between our right and left hemispheres.
The right hemisphere is responsible for speaking (word articulation), desires, rhymes, rhythm, the
perception of images, colors, planning, music, and imagination.
The left hemisphere interprets words, schedules, numbers, makes logical correlations, processes
special vision, boundary line perception, and builds identity.
Why is this important? The two hemispheres are responsible for totally different functions. We can
state that the right hemisphere is responsible for creativity and the left hemisphere for more rational
functions. It is very rare that a person’s two brain hemispheres share functions equally. It’s more
common for one hemisphere to be more active and dominant.
In other words, you could say that some people have better verbal and some have better logical
intelligence. In 1983 however, as professor at Harvard University, Howard Gardner came up with a
new theory, the theory of multiple intelligences. He summarized his thoughts in the book, Frames of
Mind: The theory of multiple intelligences.
This theory inspired me to create this book and analyze the correlation between intelligence types,
success, and happiness. In the coming chapters, I will present all nine of Gardner ’s intelligence types.
I will analyze the lives of successful people -- what is their motivation, and how did they achieve
greatness? I will provide useful advice on how to improve each of these skills. Just as I wrote above,
intelligence can be improved through learning and practice.
But first, let’s see how Howard Gardner arrived at his thesis. He tested people with special skills and
did anthropological measurements on subjects coming from different cultures. Based on the results
of this research and biological facts obtained from visual and imagining procedures, he introduced
eight (and eventually nine) intelligence categories.
Linguistic and verbal intelligence (good with words)
Logical - mathematical intelligence (good at math and solving logic problems)
Visual - spatial intelligence (good with pictures)
Body - movement intelligence (good at sports and movement)
Musical intelligence (good at music and rhythm)
Interpersonal intelligence (good with people and communication)
Intrapersonal intelligence (good analyzing skills)
Naturalist intelligence (good at understanding the natural world)
Existential intelligence (good at understanding the supernatural world)
Originally he was working with seven intelligence types, but as years passed and he dug deeper in the
topic, Gardner realized there is another intelligence type. People who are strongly connected with
nature – with the flora, fauna and minerals – were sorted into a different category for naturalist
intelligence. Connection with the environment can have a strong impact on our lives and can define a
person totally. So starting in 1995, naturalist intelligence was introduced as the eighth type of
intelligence.
In 1999 the author started considering a ninth intelligence, the existential intelligence. Gardner said
this type of intelligence “scored reasonably well on the criteria” still very vague category so he never
included it officially in his study. However, I decided to include it in my book as another type. Maybe
somebody will feel a strong connection with this type of “intelligence.”
Nowadays the emphasis is on the measurement of intrapersonal intelligence and kinesthetic
intelligence. These two quotients can provide essential information that can be used in education and
in the competitive labor market. The information acquired through the tests that measured the
subject’s ability to solve everyday tasks influenced the subject rankings. The improvement of these
subject’s abilities was found to be very useful, even indispensable in our accelerated, fast-paced
world.
Some criticize Gardner ’s theory. One criticism is that of Gardner ’s “intelligences” are not
necessarily a part of the cognitive sphere; they are skills rather than intelligence. Musical talent or
kinesthetic skills are abilities.
Another criticism attacks the fact that Gardner ’s intelligences types are separate domains. The critics
claim there is correlation between them. A ping-pong-style debate evolved after this attack. Gardner
said the illusion of correlation is due to the format of IQ tests, which always require linguistic and
logic skills. As a counterattack his critics pointed out that there are other types of IQ tests that measure
spatial abilities, reaction time, and other basic cognitive tasks that don’t involve logical or linguistic
thinking.
Gardner ’s theory’s other weak point is that the categories reflect more his intuition and reasoning
than full, empirical research.
Regardless of who is right, one thing is true: Gardner ’s concept has been very useful in education.
Many educators reflected on their teaching methods and broadened the perspective of their regular
practices. They broadened their focus and concentrated on methods that might assist people in living
their lives better.
And this is my goal as well. I strongly believe that a sharper focus on our strongest, best skills can
help build self-esteem, contentment, and confidence. Focusing and improving your strength is a
strategy that will continuously make you happy and successful.
If you want to prevail, if you seek success, improve yourself! Study! With the help of this book you
will find out, which intelligence type defines you the best. Learn how to bring out the most in it.
Chapter 4: Linguistic and verbal intelligence
Communication and thought are the greatest differences between humans and animals. Everybody can
speak or communicate in one way or another. We’ve been learning it since we were born.
However, there are some people who can do it better than others, they “have a way with words.” They
get along with others easily. They are charming, funny, can tell colorful stories and never seem like
they’d run out of things to talk about.
If you already recognize yourself in the short description above, it is highly likely that verbal
intelligence is your forte. Let’s take a look at the main characteristics of this type of intelligence.
You are a talented writer.
You tell engaging stories.
You’re good with crossword puzzles.
You like to participate in arguments – and usually win.
You’re considered to be funny.
You give clear explanations.
You have a great vocabulary and enjoy learning new words.
You’re good with foreign languages.
If you matched more than four, it is almost certain that you are gifted with verbal intelligence. Don’t
forget, people can excel in several intelligence types.
Verbal intelligence is a very complex category that we can break down into three subcategories or
dialects.
1. Spoken language
-“I have a dream…”
I don’t need to say any more of this quote. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.’s speech from the
August 28, 1963 March on Washington for Jobs and Freedom is known worldwide. He was
not only a great orator, but also a beloved public figure. He fought for the common cause of
many by calling for the end of racism and equal civil and economic rights in the United
States.
Apart from his unique presentation skills, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. used some of his
sentences repeatedly, and used some so-called anaphoras to emphasize his message. I have a
dream, now is the time, and free at last are just a few key examples of messages he repeated
when he addressed the public.
Being a good public speaker requires several skills. You have to have a powerful,
charismatic air, good language; you have to present whatever you talk about in an engaging
manner. You have to adapt your message to the audience – you present a topic differently to
teenagers than to pensioners.
You must have an emotional impact on your audience. Based on what you are talking about,
you must tap into people’s main emotions like joy, hope, disgust, anger, and fear. You have
to use vivid and descriptive words to make it easier for your audience to picture your stories.
Today, I admire stand up comedians. They have to seize the moment, capture the audience
instantly, be super funny, present jokes in a colorful yet understandable manner, recover
from failed jokes without hesitation, and they have to handle all of this in present time. If you
want to improve your public speaking skills, I’d strongly suggest “stealing” some tricks
from these guys. Also there is a growing trend in the US for the people who wish to improve
their public speaking skills to take improvisational comedy classes. Give it a try.
2. Hearing and comprehension
There are three parts to a language exam: written, oral, and listening comprehension. For the
listening comprehension, the examiner puts in a CD and the student has to pick the right
answers for the questions based on the text.
It is very interesting but this is the most commonly failed section of the test with the lowest
scores. Why?
You could answer this question with a cliché: because people like to talk more than to listen.
Nevertheless, it is true, but for good reason. Research from Lac Kong University of Vietnam
proved that listening is often ignored in elementary through high school education
worldwide. The greatest emphasis is on written language and then on spoken language.
It is important to practice listening exercises as much as possible. Good communication is
bidirectional. It is not enough to spill out your message; it is also essential to understand the
response. This includes the comprehension of the other person’s speaking style, accent,
pronunciation etc.
To improve listening and comprehending skills, it can be a good exercise to rephrase what
our speaking partner has said. After he finishes his thread ask him:
- “By saying this did you mean…” - and summarize what you understood.
This exercise will not only improve your listening skills, but it will also leave your partner
with the feeling that you were paying attention.
3. Written language
"There was no student in the entire institution with less of a military bearing than … He
moved clumsily and jerkily; his uniform hung awkwardly on him; and his knapsack, shako
and rifle all looked like some sort of fetter he had been forced to wear for a time and which
lay heavily on him."
The quote above is from The Dostoevsky Encyclopedia by K. A. Lantz, about one of the
greatest Russian novelists, F. M. Dostoyevsky.
This is a perfect example of how not all professions are a good fit for everybody.
Dostoyevsky’s father sent him to a military academy, but clearly he hated it. Body/movement
intelligence was not his strong point.
What matters in this story is that Dostoyevsky started writing books at a young age and
became one of the best character developers in the world. Critics also say he was one of the
greatest psychologists in the world of literature. His success was due to his unique way of
grabbing social dilemmas and presenting them with passion and conviction.
Some people might not be the best public speakers because even if they have all the material
they need to put together a good speech with a clear message, they lack the charisma and
courage to transmit it to the people. But maybe they can communicate the message in a
written form.
To become a great writer, you ought to be a great reader. Read as many books you can in as
many genres as possible. Reading will enrich your vocabulary, help you to get familiar with
different writing styles, and broaden your knowledge of people and the world in general.
Find your audience, find YOUR core message and make sure this message benefits them,
and that they’ll care about what you write.
Some people possess talent for all three subcategories mentioned above, and some only possess talent
for one or two. However, all of them can be improved. The person who has a natural skill in verbal
intelligence can, with diligence, become great in all other dialects. Becoming a good public speaker
or a great listener may take a lot of effort and persistence, but at the end of the day, it will be worth it.
If you master the intelligence type you are best at, you will have no problem happily making a living
from it.
Chapter 5: Logical-mathematical intelligence
Cogito ergo sum!
I think, therefore I am. People with a strong logical and mathematical intelligence are considered to
be quick-minded with good math skills and precise solutions for logic problems. They work easily
with numbers, formulas that may appear abstract, shapes, and equations. They are able to prepare
complex plans in little time. The creation and implementation of complex systems is not difficult for
them.
The Greek giant, Archimedes of Syracuse, was one of the greatest mathematicians of the ancient
world. He was a scientist, mathematician, physicist, engineer, astronomer, and philosopher from
Sicily. He discovered buoyancy (Archimedes’ principle) while bathing in a tub. Legend says that he
was so carried away by enthusiasm that he jumped out of the bath and ran naked through the streets of
Syracuse, shouting: “Eureka, eureka” (I found). And the results of his work affect our lives to this day.
Archimedes is considered the first mathematical physicist, before Galileo and Newton. He made his
mark in the fields of mathematics, geometry, physics, and astronomy. The Archimedes screw was
first used in Egypt for water-lifting machines. Nowadays this tool is used for the harvester-thresher
machines as well.
Certain eras and cultures have left strong traces in the development and advancement of academic life.
In ancient and medieval warfare advancements could have not been made without the inventions and
great discoveries of engineers. Algebra was developed based on the usage of Arabic numerals. The
Vikings brought the world advancements in shipbuilding and compass applications. The Portuguese
and Spanish ships brought us the discovery of uncharted areas.
People gifted with this intelligence type tend to do abstract logical thinking without any special effort.
At first discovery, Albert Einstein’s famous theory of relativity would have been almost impossible
for an ordinary person to follow.
People with strong logical and mathematical intelligence learn workflows faster than their peers.
They have been interested in how things work since they were children. Many did things like take
their little toy cars apart to see how they worked.
Some people learn to use computers and software easily, while others cannot grasp the basics. The
technology world’s greatest names are Bill Gates of Microsoft, Steve Jobs of Apple, and Mark
Zuckerberg of Facebook among others. There are many others. Let’s see if you have the potential to
become one of them.
Do you enjoy solving mysteries? Are you good at strategy games?
Can you solve logic problems and look for rational explanations?
Are you good at and do you enjoy math?
Do you like to organize things by category?
Have you always been interested in scientific discoveries and experiments?
Are you an abstract thinker?
Do you wonder how things work?
Are you good with computers? Do you have a mind “like a computer?”
Few people are as financially successful as those with high logical and mathematical intelligence. The
members of the Rothschild family or Gates family are the representatives of the modern age.
The last Lydian king, Croesus, who lived in ancient times minted gold and silver coins to create
currency. He was a great conqueror and legendarily rich king who understood the language of money
well.
But the wealth poisoned his mind and logical thinking thus caused his downfall. According to the
legend, he asked Apollo if he should launch a campaign against the Persians and if he did what the
outcome would be. He received the following response: "If you attack Persia, a great empire will
collapse.” He thought Apollo was talking about Persia, but he was talking about Croesus’ own
kingdom...
If you are blessed with logical and mathematical intelligence, you may have already analyzed the pros
and cons of this gift, the possibilities and hindrances around you, and you may know exactly what you
want. Now I will help you with the how.
1. Start easy: learn games that require logical intelligence.
Learn to play chess or use an abacus, and make it sure to practice often. There are lots of
books, videos, and techniques you can learn to bring out your own style.
Play at least one of them weekly. Make it a routine, on Saturday from ten to twelve play
chess. On Friday from five to six read something about chess that you’ll try the next day.
2. Take some math, science and/or computer programming courses.
Your brain craves new information. In the field of logic and math there is always more to
learn. There are universal truths like 2+2=4, but there is so much more. And there are the
ever-changing fields like informatics.
It isn’t greedy or lazy to invest in yourself by taking a course that will broaden your
knowledge. There is this wonderful fact about knowledge: once it is yours, nobody can take
away.
3. Use deductive thinking.
I think all of us would like to be Sherlock Holmes from time to time. Good news, you could
actually be a pretty good one. Make up theories in your mind and try to solve them. Read and
watch detective stories. Then make up you own story. Imagine you’re the detective of a
whodunit. It will not only broaden your deductive thinking, but it will also be fun. Who said
logic had to be boring?
4. Read the business sections of newspaper – and do the Sudoku in the back.
Being aware of the business world is a must for those who want to work in this field.
Banking, stock market changes, hedge funds, and economic charts are just a small part of the
information you should follow. Some say knowledge is power. In this field definitely! Also,
you can bring your practice from number three (above) to the next level here by deducing
real-life possibilities. Make predictions, analyze, and interpret data and statistics.
5. Brain + heart.
It’s ok to think with your heart from time to time. It’s not ruining your mastermind
reputation. It will help you understand some correlations better.
Some people think emotions ruin rational thinking. But believing that we can exclude
emotions is totally irrational. We are logical emotional beings. One cannot live happily
without the other. Even the greatest logical minds, the most materialistic businessmen, fall to
their knees in the face of some emotional beauty or sadness. Get to know the emotional side
of your coin as well. Even if you do not agree with some, accept that others see that event in
a less logical and more emotional way. If you accept this variety in human nature, you’ll be
much better at deductive thinking as well.
Like our bodies, the mind must be maintained! Like we build the body, we must build the mind too!
Reading, learning, and practice can increase the level of logical
mathematical intelligence!
Chapter 6: Visual-spatial intelligence
Everyone has heard of Michelangelo and Leonardo da Vinci, who were prominent members of the
Italian Renaissance. Michelangelo is best known for his David statue and the Sistine Chapel’s ceiling
fresco that immortalized his name. Leonardo da Vinci painted the Mona Lisa and The Last Supper.
Antoni Gaudi, the Catalan architect, is closely linked to Barcelona. Gustave Eiffel designed and built
the Eiffel Tower of Paris and the internal structure of New York's Statue of Liberty.
Thor Heyerdahl, a Norwegian ethnographer, concluded in his research that the ancestors of the
Polynesian natives lived in South America before they sailed across the Pacific Ocean to the modern-
day Polynesia. This assumption was proven to be true by the Kon-Tiki expedition he managed and
organized. Without a high degree of spatial intelligence, it would have been impossible to build a
seaworthy balsa wood raft sufficient to make the trip like he did. Celestial navigation requires a
special ability not only from the navigator, but also from the helmsman. In that age especially,
imagining the location of the ship or raft under the stars was a challenging job.
Now it is much easier with the sextant and global positioning systems (GPS).
Every man is born with high intelligence. This intelligence is never used to its full potential. Imitating
our parents, family members, and environment we are stuck using certain abilities, a fraction of what
we could be. Why? Because this is what we’ve learned. Because it's easier. The mechanical learning of
the "modern" education system stifles the mind’s activity. Our abilities and opportunities are
minimally used.
People who think in images, colors, and graphics have good spatial vision, in other words good
visual and spatial intelligence.
A spatial, problem-solving ability is essential for navigation and map creation. Also in chess when
you have to foresee the combinations of possible moves -- not only on the chessboard. In architecture
it is also essential, when an object or objects have to be described, then edited, and drawn or created,
to see a structure in all three dimensions. Spatial intelligence is also needed in painting and in
sculpture and other visual art forms.
Do you posses some of the following qualities?
You are good in putting puzzles together.
You enjoy art and photography.
You prefer geometry over algebra.
You study with charts and pictures.
You’re good with directions, and can find your way with a map.
You can visualize pictures in your head, and notice colors and shapes.
You’re good at doodling or drawing.
You can remember places vividly.
How do you train yourself to succeed in this field?
1. The brain must be “heated”.
It is a simple change we can make in our everyday actions. In the mornings, in the evenings -
during the day and after meals - we brush our teeth. Starting today let’s use the other hand,
with which we have not carried out this operation until now. Due to the unexpected and
unfamiliar change the brain starts to rebel and quit the sweet routine operations and will start
to focus. So it gets “heated”. Later we can do more complicated changes to “heat” our brain.
2. Visualize by reading.
Give yourself 15-20 minutes of reading time everyday. Read any kind of book, magazine, or
comics. Then draw out what you read. On the bottom right (or left) corner of the paper write
the date. Don’t get discouraged if the picture is not a complex technical drawing. It is enough
to recall what you read later in the week.
Recall your favorite childhood tales and stories. Draw them. Think of a short story and draw
a conceptual map. Again, it shouldn’t be a super high-quality map, just sufficient to
demonstrate the plot.
Important! DO NOT GIVE UP! Do it and practice it! A week later your drawing will be better
than it is now. After a month it will take less time and be more transparent. Be persistent! DO
NOT GIVE UP!
Do not cheat! Do it for yourself. Nobody will see your work if you don’t want them to. There’s
nothing to be ashamed of. You practice, you improve something that will make you a better
professional, and, through persistence, a better person.
3. Dare to go big.
Put your dream house on paper. Leave the computer-aided design programs for later. They
can come into play in the polishing stage. In the meantime, dream up and draw down how it
will look on the inside. Let your fantasies free: visualize your dream garden with all the
plants, different trees, and garden furniture. Now start to see the spring and autumn colors
surrounding your home. Draw in what you’d like to see in the virtual space. Then you can
use a computer program to refine the plans.
4. Fire the GPS.
You’re travelling. You sit in the car and the GPS is on. Mute the sound of the navigator and
replace it by reading the route map. It’s a good exercise. At first use a well-known route that
you know almost by heart.
Then move the exercise to the next level and instead of a GPS, use a printed map to get
directions. Search for the best route before departing. Then be your own navigator! It is time
to learn this.
5. Visual forecaster.
Put a tape measure in your pocket. Walk down the street and select an object (something big
enough to embrace), and try to guess its dimensions. How many inches is it in length or
width or height? Then measure it. Was there a big difference between your estimate and the
actual measurement? Choose another object and do the same thing. Then another, and then a
few more. Don’t change the process. After a while your estimates will get closer to the actual
size.
Another practice. How many steps am I away from the building or the stop sign? Guess.
Then count your steps! Keep practicing. So you can develop the accuracy of your estimates.
Remember, do not give up!
Chapter 7: Body - movement intelligence
Athleticism requires exceptional coordination and grace along with unmatched mental game and
competitiveness. Like Michael Jordan, the greatest basketball player of all time, who didn’t just play,
but literally reinvented basketball.
This athletic genius dropped out of his school’s basketball team. If you’ve read my previous books,
you might expect me to write something about grit and persistence. Not this time. This time I’m going
to focus simply on the super talent factor of this equation. He is a person who combined his innate
skills with diligence to master the art of movement.
Some people were born to move. Check the list below to see how many of the following general
characteristics match you. If at least four, there is a good chance you are, like MJ, gifted with this
intelligence.
You’re good at sports.
You can dance well.
You learn by doing.
You “talk” and work with your hands.
You’re interested in acting.
You like to build things.
You’re well coordinated and have good motor skills.
You can’t sit still for too long.
People forget things easily. Just try to remember what you did last Wednesday. Right? Unless your
child was born, you got your first tattoo, or you met the love of your life, you probably won’t
remember it too clearly. But maybe you never forget biking. There’s this saying about everything
related to motion: “it’s like riding a bike, once you’ve learned it you never forget.”
This is what we call kinesthetic memory. In other words, the procedure to learn and remember things
through motion. But even in kinesthetic learning there are “dialects.” People have different memory
systems and based on these differences they learn through different types of motions.
There are whole body learners, doodlers, hands-on learners, and people who learn through
emotional experiences. Not everything is like the kinesthetic learning of biking. There are some
things, which you remember short-term, however there are different techniques to plant these newly
learned things into your long-term memory.
1. Whole body learning:
People gifted with this dialect of movement intelligence learn the best and quickest if they
use their whole body actively. They can bring out the most of their potential by role-playing,
doing puzzles, body mappings, using computer technology (YouTube for example) to learn
certain movements, or computer accessory tools that require movements (like a wheel to
Need for Speed).
Regardless of whether you want to act, be a long-distance runner, or be a first-class
computer game player, you need your body and mind to be synchronized. Repetition is the
key to learning something and moving it to your long-term memory.
2. Doodlers:
If whole body learners are on one side of the coin, doodlers are on the other. Doodlers have
very high motion intelligence as well, but they learn by designing things. The best way for
them to learn and retain something in long-term memory is to mind-map, draw, story map,
etc.
If whole body learners are the players on the field, the doodler is the coach. Doodlers are
exceptionally good at creating strategies that are applicable to motion. You don’t have to
picture them as football coaches, but dance choreographers, architects, and physical
therapists.
3. Hands on learners:
There are those people who are not afraid of heavy physical work; they may even enjoy it.
They can be talented mechanics, successful body builders, good craftsmen, or even
firefighters.
The best way to retain learning related to body movement is to role-play, use clay, build, and
do every type of exercise that requires heavy manual work. If you feel talented in this regard,
you can maximize your potential by exploring all the possibilities of your profession.
Develop your manual dexterity.
If you are a good mechanic, read about new technologies and try to implement them. If you
find something useful for your job, set aside one hour every day to practice that one thing
until you can do it easily, until it becomes a subconscious reflex for you. It can also help if
you try out totally new things. Start learning to play the piano, paint, or weave.
4. People who learn through emotional experiences:
These people don’t learn by doing a motion, but by the emotions a particular motion
triggers in them. That’s why it is important for emotional learners to maximize their
potential by doing things they really enjoy. Some people are able to do stuff they don’t enjoy
much because they know if they pass that stage they’ll be much better.
Emotional learners are not like this. If they hate something, they HATE it. That’s it. So they
should use techniques that really are in balance with their emotional background. These can
be role-plays, dramas, charades, or debates. Emotional learners are usually actors,
performers, and other types of public entertainers like politicians (OK, just joking).
We have to make an important distinction between gross motor skills and fine motor skills. The
former is responsible for big range motions using our arms, legs, and body. Almost everybody has
an innate ability to acquire gross motor skills usually in early childhood. We learn to walk, run, stand
up, and climb stairs – and, eventually, biking to stick with the previous example. Gross motor skills
are those we won’t forget easily.
Fine motor skills are used in more delicate motions that involve our hands, fingers, feet, and toes.
These motions can range from learning how to pick up a fork to drawing a picture like
Michelangelo’s The Last Judgment. Gross and fine motor skills combine to be responsible for
coordination.
So good news, if you’re talented with kinesthetic intelligence, with practice you can master sculpture
just as you’ve mastered eating with a fork and a knife. It’s not something you can learn overnight, but
with practice you have a good chance of being pretty good.
How do we motivate people with kinesthetic intelligence?
Most of them are competitive, full of energy and possess a strong desire to create. So the best way to
keep them motivated is to appoint new challenges for them – long- and short-term ones. When they
complete a challenge they have to feel they improved by doing it. They learned and made a step
forward.
It is also important to give a clear explanation of the consequences if a task is not done well or if it is
overdone. Some people tend to overdo things. They are called hyperactive although I really hate this
word. I think lazy people invented the term because they were envious of their energy. (This is a non-
scientific explanation from a person who has often been labeled hyperactive. Don’t give it much
credit. No more jokes, back to the science.) Hyperactive people tend to overdo things. They need a
different kind of motivation than normal or less-motivated people. They need regular monitoring,
clear directions, and clear boundaries wherein they can act freely.
And if the task is successfully completed these people should be rewarded. If the task is not properly
completed or the expectations aren’t met this time, the worst thing one can do is to punish. On one
hand it is counterintuitive. If people try and fail and then get scolded, it’s very possible they won’t
even try the next time. You won’t get the desired result if you punish. Studies show that animals learn
things much quicker and retain the knowledge for longer when they are offered more treats than
punishment.
This is also true if you motivate yourself. Reward yourself when you complete a task. A small task
earns a small reward, and a big task earns a big reward. Punishment should be avoided. This rule
applies for all types of intelligence not only kinesthetic.
Chapter 8: Musical intelligence
Your soul is the melody, your body is the rhythm, and your mind is the rhyme.
I heard this thought a few years ago. A flash sprung up from the depths of my memory because it’s
very apt here.
The seeds of musical intelligence are in every newborn's brain, but they only grow if they’re exposed
to external stimuli. The children who perform at a high level in this area or have an affinity for music
point in this direction. It is likely that sounds and rhythms in some form will be part of their lives.
We start to hear sooner than to see, speak, or walk. Nature created us like this. Some people are tone-
deaf, some have good hearing, some relative hearing, and some people are blessed with absolute
hearing. The latter is an innate talent of a select few people. Relatively good hearing can be developed
with practice. Many musicians learn this skill. People with good hearing don’t need to feel ashamed
because at parties, weddings, or simply singing a song for fun, they hold their own. Tone-deaf people
are probably gifted with another intelligence and would be more successful in that area.
In the first few months of infancy, a child's ability to make music is displayed next to the
aforementioned detection processes. Babies babble indicating that they’re receptive to rhythms, and
melodies. It can be observed that until the age of two, this ability can develop into making up small
songs and poems. The blabbing and giggling is typical for this stage of life.
However what is the percentage of instinctive musical talent and inherited abilities in these cases? To
what extent is this intelligence innate and how much can be developed?
Musical intelligence is not only a product of the environment in which we grew up, but also inherited
from our family, and cultural heritage.
We could summarize the nature of musical intelligence this way: musical intelligence is the ability to
sing well, to compose, and to play musical instruments. With this type of intelligence, you can build a
future.
Musical intelligence is independent but still has an impact on the other varieties of intelligence.
Research has shown that music goes through other tests of intelligence as well.
Musical intelligence is largely dependent on personal development, musical training, and practice.
Music is personality forming. So are you musically intelligent?
Do you have good rhythm?
Can you read music and are you talented with an instrument or your voice?
Do you criticize new songs?
Are you often singing, whistling, or tapping along to a song?
Can you can figure out how to play a tune on an instrument?
Have you considered writing songs?
Can you tell when a note is off-key?
Can you remember old songs, and easily memorize songs?
If you have at least four of these traits above, you’re in a serious danger of being blessed with
musical intelligence.
The mapping of musical intelligence also discovered that different personality types like different
styles of music. Musical tastes may affect the way we think about our daily habits, our actions, and
even the way we dress. It is awkward if someone mocks or insults your favorite band or style of
music. You feel attracted to a certain type of music because deep down you connect with it in some
way.
A professor at Cambridge University, Peter Rentfrow found a strong correlation between musical
taste and personality. Professor Rentfrow and professor Sam Gosling at the University of Texas
defined four categories:
Reflexive / complex (classical, jazz, blues, folk). Classical music lovers are
characterized as intelligent, literate, and tolerant. They have exquisite taste, spiritual
sensitivity, are at peace with themselves, and rarely feel unsatisfied. Jazz lovers are
more assertive and strong. Blues and soul lovers form a lighter, gentler category.
Rhythmic / energetic (hip-hop, dance). People who like this style of music do not
care if it is sunny, raining, or perhaps even a raging blizzard. They are characterized
as confident, liberal thinkers. They like the company of others but also enjoy being
alone. They are active and passive participants in sports that play an important role
in their lives. Satisfied with their outlook, they don’t care much about others’
opinions.
Amusement / traditional (pop, country). Pop and country music lovers are
confident, diligent in their work, and love to help others. At some level, they are
characterized by a rather conservative attitude. They are open and honest. It is
important for them to maintain customs and traditions. Even though they have a
strong self-esteem, they can often feel dissatisfied with themselves.
Intensive / rebel (heavy metal, rock, alternative rock, rap). Fans of this music are
usually sporty, energetic, and adventurous. Always looking for new and special
challenges, they can be characterized as curious and intelligent. Rap lovers have
great self-confidence, maybe even too much sometimes. Generally they are open,
friendly with people, and eager to seek the company of others.
The brain center responsible for the perception of music and composition is located in the right
hemisphere. However, the sections in charge of musical abilities cannot be demarked very clearly.
A musically talented person is often also a good dancer and singer. It is also true that not all good
dancers are good singers, no matter how excellent their musical talent. What they have in common is
a sense of rhythm.
How can musical intelligence be improved?
1. Practice, practice, and practice.
It doesn’t matter what area of the music and rhythm field you want to improve, practice is
key. You dance? Dance more. You sing? Sing more. You compose? Compose more. I could
really blab a few more paragraphs full of reasons, but I’ll conclude with this one word:
PRACTICE.
2. Learn and exercise with music.
Some people are said to be visual types when it comes to learning. A person with musical
intelligence is more the audio type. They should attach music to different subjects when they
learn them. Listen to the same melody for the same topic. When the exam comes they can just
recall the melody and remember the subject as well. Also, these people can use rap to
memorize lists and course materials.
Music can boost your physical resistance too. When you hear your favorite music your
blood starts to pump quicker and your performance endurance will increase. This rule
applies for everybody, not only those who are not particularly gifted with musical
intelligence.
3. Try out different fields of musical intelligence.
Are you a singer? Try to write a song or join a dance group. Are you a dancer? Try
choreography. The more fields you explore, the bigger your experience and expertize will
become. At the end of the day all these fields are connected through rhythm. Whatever you
do, your sense of rhythm will improve. Make the most of it!
If you feel vulnerable or incomplete and fear those many hours of practice won’t pay off, just
remember this.
Beethoven’s Third Symphony was presented in 1805 and a milestone in music history. Beginning in
1802, the artist gradually began to lose hearing and still managed to compose the Ninth Symphony
when he was totally deaf. This, nor any of his previous work could have been written without years of
utter and diligent practice.
So do not give up! Practice, believe, and be patient. It will pay off.
Chapter 9: Interpersonal intelligence
If I say the names Mother Theresa, Princess Diana, and Oprah Winfrey, what is the first word that
pops into your mind? Maybe something like kind-hearted, empathic, “a people person,” or famous in
the best sense of the word. All of this is true.
People with strong interpersonal intelligence can easily understand others’ feelings and motivations.
They have a strong sense of empathy and justice, and they are not afraid to share their opinions with
others. They like giving advice and listening to people’s problems. A person with interpersonal
intelligence attracts others who want to share their problems.
If you think that more than four of the following qualities describe you, it’s highly possible your
interpersonal intelligence is quite high.
You can often read others’ minds.
You have a strong sense of justice.
You’re a good listener.
You have a well-developed “lie detector.”
You enjoy being around others.
You have good problem-solving skills.
You are empathetic.
You are skilled in verbal and nonverbal communication.
Traditionally, there are more women than men who have interpersonal intelligence as their strongest
intelligence. Women can read body language more intuitively; they can express and so understand
others people’s feelings better.
How can interpersonal intelligence be measured? The author of the first book written on the topic of
multiple intelligence, Dr. Howard Gardner, equalized interpersonal intelligence with Goleman’s
emotional intelligence. EI (or EQ) can be measured with several tests based on the traditional IQ tests.
But here emotion-based problem-solving skills are emphasized. Some question these tests’ accuracy
and their capacity to measure the level of intelligence citing a lack of objectively correct answers.
Since the answers are based on emotion, it is impossible to create questions with clearly right or
wrong answers.
Anyway, my point here is not to decide whether EI tests are accurate or not, but to get you to think
about it. You all can decide for yourselves if you want to give credit to the EI tests. I personally think
that EI, or any kind of test that we do, is just an opportunity for feedback about your current
intelligence level in that particular area. I believe everything can be improved. You should focus on
the hows not the whys. In other words, use “how can I evolve?” instead of “why did I get this score?”
or “why am I not better at…?”
Remember, change is bidirectional – you can change for the better or for worse. But evolvement or
improvement indicates a positive direction, always higher than before.
So how can you improve your interpersonal intelligence?
People who have a strong interpersonal intelligence are more extroverted, love teamwork, team
sports, and are social butterflies. They feel comfortable among people and don’t mind getting to
know strangers. They have many friends or close acquaintances. They would like to meet as many
people as possible during their days, but must be careful not to neglect other responsibilities. Many
interpersonal people are spontaneous but a little disorganized. So my first tips for them are these:
1. Get organized. Keep your schedule in a calendar or booklet. Explore and establish a
time-management system that allows you to do as many of your favorite activities as
you want but still allows you to fulfill your everyday requirements.
Also, make sure to keep in touch with your network. Take the time to meet with all the
important people around you regularly (weekly or every two weeks). If several people are
equally important to you, give them equal time so you can to save yourself from an
unwanted sense of guilt.
2. Practice listening. People with a strong interpersonal intelligence are not only natural
connection-makers, but also good listeners. However, just as making a great connection
needs practice, so does deep listening. Luckily for you, opportunities to improve this
skill are countless. Since you are always surrounded with people, just decide to dedicate
your time and focus on the person you are with. Decide that in the next thirty minutes
you will only listen to your spouse, child, or friend.
Think through what they are talking about, if there is a hidden message behind their words.
Do not interrupt them, maintain eye contact, nod if they need encouragement. If they stop,
count to three before you ask a question or reflect your own opinion. Maybe they are just
thinking about how to go on. You can give positive feedback to them in two ways. One way
is to ask more about their problem. Another way is to rephrase what they said with your own
words – this will show that you are listening and avoid misunderstandings.
3. Use different channels to communicate with people. This way you’ll not only broaden
your knowledge of how to handle conversations in different areas, but also get to know
many kinds of people. What I mean: have face-to-face meetings everyday or a few times
a week with people you are fond of. Also have some pen pals – if they are from different
countries, even better. You can enjoy interesting conversations and get a perspective
about how people think about the same ideas on a different side of the globe. Go to
events where you don’t know everybody – so you can improve your “first impression”
charisma.
4. Make learning a hobby. Regardless of whether your main job is strongly connected
with interpersonal intelligence or not, find time to practice. Participate in workshops
and/or seminars that are communication related. Find a hobby that involves meeting
like-minded people. Listen and share. A learning process can have two directions: one is
when you listen and absorb new information, the other is when you share your
knowledge and teach others.
5. Meditate about your connections. Sometimes even the most social person needs time
to withdraw and analyze the events and people. Take the time to contemplate the week’s
events once a week, maybe Sunday. Think about who you met, what conversations you
had. Did it improve or destroy your relationship? Was there a mistake? Where? What
were the best parts of the conversation? Where can you build that specific relationship in
the future? After this, make a meeting schedule (see point 1) for the next week. And start
practicing points 1-5 all over again.
The five points above are good ways to improve your interpersonal intelligence, bring out the most
of your extraverted skills, and, with practice, eventually become a master communicator and
connection-maker.
Interpersonal intelligence is important if you are working as a diplomat, manager, clergy, social
worker, but also if you are a sales person, coach, or politician. All professions fit you if they require
engagement with people.
A last piece of advice for you, my interpersonal intelligence-heavy friend: understand many, but react
to only a few. In other words, do not let others ruin your mood. When I arrived in a new community
at fourteen I was very energetic, jumpy with a let’s-do-it attitude. But I had to realize the others around
me were simply not like that. And I was, “oh, no? ok… well…” And I repressed my burning desire to
get to know people for a time in an effort to blend in until I met somebody who was just like me.
It is good to meet as many people as possible, but learn to accept that not all of them think as you do.
Do not take it personally. Listen to them, make notes about their behavior, don’t judge them, but also
you do not have to identify with them. Just because you can’t make a super connection with them, it
doesn’t mean something’s wrong with you. It means the two of you think on different wavelengths.
What you can do is choose to spend most of your time with like-minded people who help you and
enforce this strength in you.
I also wouldn’t suggest avoiding the other group of people. It is important to know how to handle as
many types of people as possible. But do not take their problems and words personally.
Being empathic and sensible, you can get emotionally hurt quite easily because you feel strongly.
Build up a self-protection system. When you start feeling somebody is touching your soul “with dirty
hands” just repeat this:
This is not about me. This person is uneasy with him/herself. I love myself! I feel good! I
know who I am!
Chapter 10: Intrapersonal intelligence
Intrapersonal intelligence helps people detect and understand their own emotions. Humans are no
longer living on instincts anymore, but we have risen to the intellectual-emotional level. Now we have
to learn how to cohabitate with the environment and ourselves. If we’re at peace with the latter, we
won’t have big issues with the former.
This is an ability (intelligence) that helps us discover our motivations and emotions objectively. Our
inner world is what we reflect to others. When we make connections with other people through
human relations and everyday activities, we have to know how to handle and control our feelings.
An individual’s everyday life is strongly influenced by the components of intrapersonal and
interpersonal intelligence. There’s a theory that 80 percent of a person’s success depends on inter-
and intrapersonal intelligence. These two intelligences together make up our emotional intelligence.
The remaining 20 percent is made up of other intelligence types. The authenticity of these
assumptions has not yet been proven in any literature’s factual findings. Your practical experience
will prove or disprove this hypothesis.
But the fact that well-developed intra- and interpersonal intelligence can remarkably improve
personal relationships is indisputable. Just like how understanding our own emotional motivations
helps us accept ourselves and others.
People with strong intrapersonal intelligence can be characterized as strong-willed and determined;
they know themselves. They are aware of their abilities. They walk the walk because they’ve found
their purpose in life. They’ve set goals and targets they want to reach. They are self-confident and this
confidence emanates from the knowledge of their own abilities. They are able to learn from their
mistakes and successes as well. They are independent and prefer to act alone.
People with high intrapersonal intelligence are usually philosophers, poets, novelists, mystics,
counselors, songwriters, and psychologists. People with a deep sense of self.
Psychology is one of the professions where individuals with advanced intrapersonal intelligence are
frequently represented. They have an ability to detect, localize, and resolve psychological problems.
Most of them chose this path to learn more about themselves, their issues, and then help others with
similar problems.
Many people can’t detect the small quivers of the human soul. They simply do not develop the ability.
This is not a problem for others. These perceptions are absolutely natural. They can tune their brains
quite simply to the vibrations, feelings, and signals flowing their way. They interpret and evaluate
them.
Below are the characteristics that best describe this type of intelligence.
You have deep self-knowledge, and you’re also self-critical.
You’re aware of your own feelings.
You have a well-developed sense of self and honor your values.
You have a strong awareness of your purpose in life.
You have good intuitive abilities.
You’re analytical.
You are a unique and private person.
You don’t like to go with the flow.
If at least half of the criterion above apply to you, your intrapersonal intelligence is above average.
You can create a real picture of yourself and it's much different from your family members’ and
friends’ biased opinions.
Autism is a manifestation of intrapersonal intelligence. Autistic people have impaired intrapersonal
intelligence. They cannot see their own personalities so clearly. Let me share an example.
Many of you have probably seen the movie Mercury Rising. Art Jeffries (Bruce Willis) is a
disillusioned FBI agent on the verge of a nervous breakdown. Simon Lynch is a nine-year-old autistic
boy who, through a unique combination of capabilities, deciphers the US military's secret code, the
Mercury. This is an extremely complex cryptographic code. It was said that no human or computer
could crack the code. As a test it was created to protect the United States’ most important secrets. The
creators hid the solution in a secret phone number in a puzzle magazine. The experts said the code
couldn’t be deciphered. Simon called this phone number.
The secret has to be kept. Simon's parents are killed and the child himself is in danger. Art finds the
little boy and behind the fear he can see the reflection of his own spiritual world. When you have
nothing to lose, isolation can provide strength. It is interesting and educational to follow of the
personality development of the two main characters in this movie.
Intrapersonal intelligence is a dominant part of our personality. It’s a set of features of individual
personality traits. A healthy personality is characterized by several criteria.
Let’s see how we strengthen our intrapersonal intelligence.
1. Get to know yourself.
To develop intrapersonal intelligence you need to know yourself better! You can start by
doing personality tests. Know where you stand! Keep a log that describes your day-to-day
thoughts. Then periodically check the log for the details from your past. Acknowledge what
changed, what’s the same, and what’s better. Meditate to get closer to your own feelings and
thoughts.
2. Find a hobby that sets you far from the crowd.
People with a high intrapersonal intelligence are usually introverts. The following saying
applies to them: “We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we
speak.” Thus they prefer hobbies where they can be alone or where they do not have to
interact too much.
This hobby can be reading biographies or self-help books out in nature. Find a place where
you can be totally relaxed and get into a meditative mood.
3. Set long and short term personality goals for yourself.
Think about the qualities you’d like to improve in yourself. Imagine yourself being that
person. Visualize the benefits of this evolution, then think about the cognitive and actionable
steps you have to make in order to achieve the desired skill.
Keep a notebook for recording the steps. Every evening write two or three things you have
to do the next day to practice the quality you want to improve. Also, in the evening write
down what you did or did not achieve from the previous day’s plan. Meditate about it. Why
did or didn’t you accomplish something? How did you feel doing them? Write everything
down so you can reread it anytime.
4. Write your own autobiography or book.
Often in childhood we report certain events differently to our parents or teachers. In
adulthood we do the same with our friends or bosses. This skill can be taken to the next level
and it can even provide a livelihood. There are people who are really born to write, but their
propensity for writing has not yet been discovered.
Some people may have not yet realized that everything they do or say has an impact on other
people. Train and develop this quality and put your ideas in a book. At first only a few people
will listen, but gradually, more and more people will come.
Everybody can philosophize and share ideas. If you have a talent for it, why not give it a
chance and do it more openly? Create your own framework of ideas. By working in your
own system your sense of security may increase. If you train yourself, there is a good chance
you can make a living from it.
You have the skill to recognize and change your behavior, build upon your strengths, and improve
your weaknesses. You can develop yourself in a shorter period of time than others and can be goal-
orientated in a more focused manner.
Chapter 11: Naturalist intelligence
There was a man in England who at the age of eight started to collect shells and minerals and took
long walks to observe the environment. At the age of thirteen, he began assisting his brother in a
chemistry lab. His father wanted him to become a doctor, but he disliked the medicine university and
left it after two years. Instead, he continued his studies in natural science with the geology faculty.
Between 1831 and 1836 he participated in a shipping expedition and conducted geological research in
South America. Among his main theories he devised the theories of evolution, natural selection, and
selective breeding. He is the author of the book, The Descent of Man, where he presents the theory of
human being descendent from apes. Yes, this man is Charles Darwin, the greatest naturalists of all
time.
Naturalistic Intelligence, by definition, is the ability to find patterns in nature and work in a natural
environment with animals, wildlife, and plants.
People who have a strong naturalistic intelligence love spending time outside. They love hiking,
camping, gardening, taking care of animals etc. The most fitting professions for them are as
geologists, marine biologists, farmers, zookeepers, ecologists, veterinarians, gardeners, etc.
These types of people have a great sensitivity to nature-related issues like pollution and animal
cruelty. They divide the living things (animals, plants) from other features of nature (minerals, rocks,
waters…), but they show a keen interest in protecting or discovering both.
If you have a Charles Darwin lost somewhere inside you, at least four of the following qualities will
apply to you.
You have a broad knowledge of nature.
You are sensitive to ecology and environmental and animal abuse.
You see patterns in nature.
You have a keen sense of balance with nature and your body.
You choose to be a vegetarian.
You read about nature and explorers.
You prefer nature to cities.
You feel the best in nature.
Do you feel quite a few of these characteristics define you? Then you should explore this talent of
yours a bit more.
How do you improve your naturalistic intelligence?
1. Observe nature around you.
When I was a kid – it’s debatable whether this was a long or short time ago – winters were
long and cold with a lot of snow. I still remember my grandpa pulling the sled and taking me
out to play in the snow. This however, has changed in the past fifteen years. It snows seldom
and often Christmas day is warmer than it is in May. I do not know much about the science of
it, but I do have an empirical base of comparison.
If discovering nature is your passion, do not hesitate to make some notes about it. If you see
or experience something weird or uncommon, write it down. As the years progress you’ll
have more and more interesting facts to compare and analyze. It’s a long process, but it’s
worth it. It’s like keeping a journal of your feelings; it is good to read your thoughts five
years later.
2. Hands on.
People with naturalist intelligence love to be outdoors most of the time. Depending on what
you have an affinity for, you could choose a new hobby to pass the time.
If you are into plants and you don’t have a direct connection with animals, but you’d like to
help them, you can get involved by volunteering to help care for wildlife. Time spent in the
forest together with likeminded people, foresters, and other naturalists, could give you a
boost for the weeks to come. Nature heals, and if you heal it in return, you’ll feel a sense of
enjoyment.
If you love animals and you’d like to spend more time with them but you can’t have a pet (or
you have a pet but it’s still not enough), you can assist at the local zoo, animal shelter, or
farm – whatever you have in your area. By connecting with animals, you’ll feel a sense of
completeness and helping somebody (even if it has four legs) releases a lot of positive
energy.
Do you like to be outside in your community? Help out in local parks and gardens. Plant
flowers or trees, pick up litter, repaint the benches, these are all useful and relaxing activities
that give back to your community.
3. Zoom in.
Like, literally. If you are more fascinated by microbiology, the cellular function of beings,
buy a microscope, binoculars, or a telescope. Study the skies, plants, minerals, and
soils. Take notes about your observations.
Join a science or research group with a similar profile and discuss your analyses with the
professors or other students.
I presented the three options above as part-time activities or hobbies, but any of them can become
main activities in your life, and even provide a livelihood. It is never too early or to late to improve
naturalist intelligence.
I have a friend from San Francisco who recently retired. He is sixty-five years old. He worked as an
engineer all his life but has recently decided he wants to make a change. He decided to enroll at one of
the local universities to get a degree in archeology, and now he researches genetic changes in cells.
He wants to become a professor. I repeat: he is sixty-five. He is so amazing and inspiring!
Think small or big about environmental involvement, both make a great difference. If every human in
the world would pick up litter, plant some flowers and trees, and wouldn’t consume so many natural
resources (water, energy), we would live in a much better and cleaner world.
Chapter 12: Existential intelligence
"If an atheist and a pope think the same thoughts, it means that there is something that is true. There
should be a human truth that exists regardless of religions." Until humanity has reached this
recognition has lived through long centuries of trials and tribulations. This is a good starting point
for the study and exploration of this subject. The quote comes from Oriana Fallaci, an Italian writer
and journalist.
At the beginning, because of a lack of explanation, natural phenomena were attributed to powerful
forces or spirits. People learned how to make fire, by calling on the God of Fire for help. For a
successful hunt they had to seek the favor of the spirit that guided the animals. Then they had to
placate the spirit of the prey. An unsuccessful hunt resulted in a different kind of atonement ceremony.
According to many, existential intelligence is the capability that best defines people. By contrast, in
the academic world studies of the soul and spirit are not taken seriously and considered to be
unfounded.
Where human life exists, there is existential intelligence. We leave this world with what our souls
lived and experienced. These are not tangible, three-dimensional values. The soul is immortal; the
body is mortal.
Human civilization and society has only been able to evolve and move forward when someone has
violated the rules. True, the offender had to prove he was right, because if not ... retaliation came.
Many times retaliation came even in spite of the evidence. At first they became the protagonists of a
human sacrifice – in accordance with the habits of the era. Then leaders refined the rules and began to
develop consequent penalties - law. They wanted to break the soul not just the body. Inquisition,
anyone?
It has been a long road from the fire god to the organized religions of today. The established
religions have some common features -- they seek questions and answer them, they explain how
people were created and the purpose of their existence, they show other forms of existence. This is a
very simplified idea.
Atheism is the belief in the absence of God or other supernatural forces. Some of the best known
philosophers and thinkers - Marx, Nietzsche, and Freud – have said that people believe in God and the
supernatural because they are afraid of death. It gives them a sense of security. The fear of punishment
and otherworldly rewards influence their actions.
The existential intelligence is the most controversial of the intelligence types. To answer in-depth
questions concerning human existence assumes a sensitivity to these issues. They try to answer such
questions as:
What is the origin of the universe?
How did life on Earth appear?
How did mankind appear?
What is the meaning of life?
Why do we die?
Is there life after death?
Is there a cosmic experience of unconditional love?
What is the sense of happiness?
A small group of people, philosophers, are interested in unfolding the questions of existentialism.
Here I take a science-based approach. Anthroposophy is the study of wisdom and knowledge in
humans. It is the doctrine of man's knowledge based on philosophical principles.
Rudolf Steiner was a philosopher, writer, teacher, dramaturge, and the creator of a spiritual
movement called anthroposophy. He is also the founder of Waldorf Education. This is a people-
centered pedagogy, in which the child’s talent for certain activities, teaching methods, and curriculum
determines the lessons.
Every culture has developed their questions and self-explanatory systems. Regardless of the culture
there are common features. These commonalities have emerged and started differentiating only in the
course of time during the dawn of humanity.
How do we develop this abstract and colorful intelligence?
1. We are many. Accept it and get familiar with the nuances.
To encourage the development and emergence of existential intelligence, we must be
acquainted with the most widespread religious and philosophical systems. Seek the company
of like-minded people and discuss with them the progress humans have made in this respect.
2. Open up.
Develop the capability and inclination to get closer to the great questions of life - life, death,
values, truth, happiness, etc. How do you formulate the questions correctly and how do you
answer them? Train yourself.
3. Mix up the abstract with the material.
The most important practical application you must be aware of is that your position is
determined by your own decision making and attitude. Our system of values will vary
depending on the decisions we make and how they affect our human relations. This also
applies to business relationships. For example, a company undertaking social responsibility
and social sensitivity training is highly dependent on the leader ’s existential intelligence.
Even Howard Gardner did not accept existential intelligence officially as a ninth intelligence type.
Still, I thought it would be interesting to give some thought to this talent, ability, lifestyle… whatever
we call it. Some people are indeed spiritual and sensitive to humanity’s great questions. It is
positioned in the center of their lives.
So why not consider bringing out the most of it?
Chapter 13: How to discover your strengths?
What do you want to be when you grow up?
People frequently ask children this question. I think there is no adult who does not remember their
biggest childhood dream: truck driver, firefighter, captain, doctor, polar explorer, lion tamer, actress
or actor, officer, or astronaut. It is almost impossible to list all the choices. Remember the beginnings,
the first experiences, and the end results. Dig down to the depths of your being and discover yourself
again.
What’s that burning desire inside you that makes you restless even to think about? What makes your
heart pound and opens up your mind and soul?
Let me tell you something: you are unique. You have something that nobody in this world possesses.
You can be great in (at least) one thing that you can master, perfect and give to the world.
Do not let anybody discourage you. Don’t try to fulfill others’ expectations. They don’t know your
strengths or callings as well as you.
In previous chapters, I described nine types of intelligences: verbal, logical-mathematical, visual-
spatial, body-kinesthetic, musical, interpersonal, intrapersonal, naturalistic, and existential. You are
gifted with at least one of these. Maybe you are “bilingual” or “trilingual”, in other words, you are
equally gifted with two or three intelligences. None of them are better than the other; they are
different.
So why are they important? You know there’s a saying that every journey starts with a single step. But
in which direction should you start moving?
The best choice is to find work in accordance with your strengths. Why? Let’s picture a fish. What
first skill or adjective would we attribute to this animal (and let’s not picture a whale)? Good
swimmer? Quick? Maybe slim? All these, right? Now let’s picture the same fish trying to climb a tree.
Now how would we characterize it? Lame, weak, and struggling? It’s the very same fish. It matters,
my dear reader.
The same rule applies to people. If a person does something that fits him or her, something that gives
her passion, something she has a talent in, then that person is happy, inspiring, a “good swimmer.” If
somebody does something that doesn’t give happiness, fulfillment, and that she has no talent for, then
she is just like a fish at the base of a tree.
How do you determine your main intelligence type?
Ask questions of yourself. Answer these questions. Practice and start to train your brain. A good
question leads to a good answer. More good questions lead to more good answers. A lot of questions
and answers can begin to draw out your personality and help you start something.
What’s a good question? Why do we care about the answer? Now, that's a very good question! There
are two answers to this.
1. Silver lining.
If you're just curious and want to feed your vanity, you answer questions and fill out various
tests dishonestly. The answers given to the questions are far from the truth. You polish your
ego. But these fake mood-boosters melt away quickly and you stay in the big nothing.
2. Objectivity.
If you want to change your life, then be honest and objective with yourself. Don’t do this for
the sake of the neighbors; do this for yourself.
Sincerity! Objectivity!
These are two magic words that you should keep in mind! Pay attention to the content and
meaning of both, and use your brain to act with these two words in mind so you can find
your true strength, your main intelligence. Which is first, second, and third?
Take a piece of paper and pen. It’s time to do some work. Only through the written word can we find
the true answers. I’ll ask four similar questions. Write each down on a separate sheet of paper giving
your most honest and accurate answers.
What did I want to be when I was little?
What was my dream 5 - 10 - 15 years ago?
How do I see myself at this moment?
Who do I want to become in 5 - 10 - 15 years?
To each of the four questions write ten attributes, skills, strength, which define your current state.
Write the characteristics from 1 to 10 under each for better transparency. Do not read any further until
you’re finished. This may take a few minutes, hours, or even days.
The characteristics of your childhood are important because at that time you’re building your
personality and your dreams into your subconscious. These dreams and desires are stowed and only
waiting for an external stimulus to break to the surface once again. There are huge power reserves in
those dreams, you just have to find the key to open the door. It is important to be honest in an
objective manner.
When this is done, you can move to the next step.
Find the characteristics that can be found on all of the four sheets.
Such repetitions can occur more than once. It is also possible that there is no such quality that appears
on all the four sheets, only on three or two.
Now take a clean sheet of paper, and write on it all those characteristics that could be found on all
four (or three) sheets. How many of them are present four times? Which are those? This is very
important.
Interpret the results. This is another essential step you should not rush through. In the previous
chapters (4 to 12) I talked about the basic characteristic of human intelligence types and what criterion
describe them. Scroll back and look through the book. In what intelligence type do your common
characteristics fall?
The more characteristics that can be associated with an intelligence type, the more accurate the
information you possess will be. These indicators of intelligence – from the “I was, I am, and I will
be” periods assist in further development. You’ll find out:
What are your general characteristics?
How were you?
How are you?
How do you want to be?
What are your strengths?
What are your weaker, just "light" abilities?
Where do you need improvement?
Do not forget to always keep in your mind: sincerity and objectivity.
John D. Rockefeller, businessman and multi-millionaire, once said, "I pay more for the ability to get
along with people, than any other skill." Why is this important? It's because the vast majority of
people are looking for job security. There are far fewer people creating jobs.
The biggest US companies recruit employees mainly based on their personality. The diplomas and
expertise are not as important as possessing the right personality traits. If the candidate has a good
character, then he/she can be taught to do the required tasks successfully. You can have five degrees,
four doctorates, and know almost everything, but if your personality is ugly, no one will want to
spend the time, money, and energy to change it.
85 percent of what we achieve in life depends on how we get along with others.
85 percent of our happiness comes from finding the right partner.
Honestly and objectively assess your current state. Where are you now?
Write down what you want to achieve. Life starts now!
What happens from this moment on is up to you.
Chapter 14: What’s your main intelligence type? How can you
make a living from it?
What is your main intelligence type? What activity makes you the happiest? What do you love doing?
If the answer to these questions does not pop into your mind instantly maybe you should flip the coin
to the negative. In other words, what do you hate doing? What activities leave a bitter taste in your
mouth?
For example, you hate numbers but work as an accountant. This is quite tragic. Or you hate music,
and you’re a doorman at a music academy where music comes from ten different doors.
Sometimes it is helpful if you exclude some intelligence types and consider only those that aren’t
awful for you to begin.
Another good approach is to think back to what questions you asked your family when you were little.
Like, “I’d like to play guitar,” or “I’d like to take a long walk in the forest.” The activities you want to
do reflect a desire to subconsciously improve your main intelligence type. Whatever you request
most can lead you to your main intelligence type.
A third way to find your main intelligence type is to think about how you treat your spouse, friends,
or children. If your main type is interpersonal intelligence, you often take your significant others to
social events and organize big parties for your loved ones. If you’re gifted with intrapersonal
intelligence, you’ll buy some self-development books or a ticket to a self-improvement course as a
gift for your friends and family. Ask yourself how do you most often express your appreciation?
Remember, this is a way of uncovering your main intelligence type but not a rock-solid indicator.
Gifting habits can be learned from your parents. If your dad often gave psychological books to your
mom, or flowers, you may do the same as an adult. It doesn’t necessarily mean your strength is
intrapersonal or naturalistic intelligence. Still if other behaviors agree, observing how you treat
others can be a confirmation of your main intelligence type.
Let’s say now, for argument’s sake, that you know your primary intelligence type. Now you know you
love doing this and you’re good at it, but the next question is how can I make a living from it?
This is a question I have been thinking a lot about. And once I came across Cal Newton’s book, So
Good They Can’t Ignore You. The main message of this book might seem counterintuitive at first. The
writer says you should not pursue your passion; it is the fool’s method. What you should do is be ok
with grinding a little bit, and when you grind in whatever industry you collect something called
“career capital.” When you have enough career capital, you can exchange it for whatever makes you
satisfied in life. This, in some degree, can be creativity, freedom in your occupation, and a bigger
impact. The basic message is that it is not the industry or the actual job itself that matters, but the
freedom and approach you take with it.
What do you think about this my dear reader? To some extent I agree with Mr. Newport. Indeed, there
is no point in being reckless. If you have no savings, nothing to buy bread, and your dream doesn’t
become profitable, it will poison the entire process. A Spanish proverb: where hunger knocks on the
door, love jumps out on the window.
Let’s think this through with my favorite theory, Maslow’s hierarchy (or pyramid) of needs. The
theory states that human needs can be divided into five main categories. You can not move up until the
lower level is fulfilled.
1. The lowest level consists of basic needs like eating, sleeping, and meeting basic
physiological needs. If somebody is hungry they’re not so open to listening to speeches
about self-realization and living a better life. That person will say, “ok, ok just give me
some food.” It makes sense. Until the very basic needs are met, you won’t be able to
focus on anything else. So in order to step to the next level you need to make sure
you’re ok at this level. One of my favorite motivational speakers, Peter Szabo, shared an
example in one of his presentations. He was often asked to give motivational speeches to
homeless people to encourage them to seek a better life. His answer was this: “I don’t
think this is a good idea. Not because I don’t care about them or think their life cannot be
better, but because at the level they are, they won’t be interested.”
2. The second level is safety. If the first level’s needs are met, a person can start to care
about their personal, financial, and health safety. This means that in order to move to
level three you have to be ok with your health and economic condition as well as your
family and property’s safety. Many people with potential get stuck at this level.
I don’t like to demonize things, but I think television is to blame for this matter. Please don’t
get me wrong, I don’t want to discourage anybody from reading or listening to the news, but
think about how it makes you feel. This person died, that exploded, terrorists attacked… It is
full of negative vibes, fear, and tragedies. If I listen to the news, by the end I feel anxious, like
my safety is threatened. I don’t feel safe anymore, so I lose control over the higher levels of
this pyramid. And this happens to so many people. The one thing they are not conscious of is
that they cannot change the news. They can’t influence it so why worry? Why not climb
higher on the personal development ladder instead of getting stuck in a state of anxiousness?
If you read the news, I strongly recommend letting it go afterward, unless you’re the
president of the United States. Then you can have an influence.
3. The third level is the level of love and belonging. Family, romantic relationship, and
friends are on this level. Here is another example of where personal well-being prevails.
If you are not ok with your own physiological needs and safety, you cannot focus
properly on others. It is important for people to feel that they are needed. Every man
wants to be treated as an individual and to take responsibility. If you feel needed and
appreciated, you’ll have a sense of importance.
4. The level of esteem. Here people are ok with physiological needs, they feel safe and
loved so they have a real chance to improve themselves without any distractions or
negative feelings. Self-confidence, self-respect, and respect of others’ achievements can
reach great levels if you focus on them.
5. The highest level is self-actualization. This is the level where dreams come true.
Unleashed creativity, morality, high-level problem solving, and lack of prejudice all
belong at this level. Living your main intelligence type is on the highest level here.
There are a few lucky people who can live by their strongest intelligence from the second level -- the
first level has nothing to do with it. That’s the level of basic instincts.
Those who are doing something that is not their passion shouldn’t hand in their resignation
tomorrow. They won’t be happy painting all day if they are kicked out of their apartment. Here’s my
suggestion:
- First things first, accept your situation as it is for now. Unless you have a better
option, do not do anything hasty. If you cannot change your position right now, change
something you can: your thoughts about it. Stop looking at it as a burden, but the
necessary evil you need to move through until you have the career capital you need. In
order to focus on the fifth level of the pyramid, you shouldn’t crush level two.
- Introduce it slowly into your life: whatever your passion and talent is, you should
have it in your life even if you work in a different field. Some people can be fully
content keeping their passion as a life-long hobby. Those hours spent with their favorite
pastime can invigorate them so much they don’t care about the minor nuisances
anymore. Are you crazy about sports? Do something every day after work. Practice and
learn actively, and if you feel your hobby is ready to be taken to the next level, take the
necessary steps. Only then.
- The edge of glory: if you are ready to make a living from your passion, but
something is keeping you back, analyze the reasons why. Determine if your fear of
failure is justified. For example, if you’ve become an excellent painter of amoebas, but
are hesitant to open an amoeba art gallery, maybe you’re right. Maybe this isn’t a good
idea. But if you are 100 percent positive your passion is something that others could
profit from also, maybe the “problem” is at level four of the pyramid. Maybe you need
more self-confidence. I think the difference between doing an activity as a hobby and a
career is how useful it is to others – thus how marketable. I know it sounds a bit
materialistic, but if you sell something people want nobody will question whether or not
you deserve the money. Brian Tracy is a millionaire; he did what he wanted most of his
life, but I don’t envy him any of his pennies. He worked hard and helped thousands or
maybe millions of people with his thoughts and courses. Wealth is a direct consequence
of a well-executed skill.
- Don’t forget how easy it is to fall back. Reaching level five on the pyramid doesn’t
guarantee you’ll stay there. Continuous work must be done in all the previous levels to
maintain this high-level position. Let me share an example, please don’t be offended.
Let’s say you’re on top of the tops, the world’s greatest CEO; however, if you need to
pee you fall right back to level one in a second. The greater this urge grows the less
you’ll be able to concentrate on anything other than a proper British “water cooler” or,
at least a bush. This rule applies to higher levels too. If your daughter was in a city just
hit by an earthquake, you’ll be crazy-terrified until you get news she’s ok. The point
here is to know that continuous work must be done on all levels to stay at level five. It’s
impossible to stay there 24/7. The most you can do is to quickly overcome any issues
that drag you to lower levels.
If you plan on changing your lifestyle, first do some research to learn what is needed to be able to
monetize this passion. Some people, because they are so focused on their passion, don’t think about
what they need to be good at it. I can’t tell you what exactly is needed because every profession
requires different research. Collectively I can tell you two things: be true to your passion, and dig
deep to discover how you can combine it with your market’s demands.
Chapter 15: How do you change your “dark side?”
I cannot emphasize enough the importance of self- love. If you don’t love yourself, you can’t make
others happy either. Some people can go to extremes hating themselves. Is it possible to love
somebody you hate?
This is a difficult question to answer. Hate is provoked by unhappiness, dissatisfaction, and anger. If
you live a life you hate, it becomes a burden to go on with it day after day. People often make
promises to themselves that they will not keep. “Just resist a few more weeks, months, years… “ you
tell yourself. “You can’t change now; your mortgage must be paid. But when that’s done then…”
In the meantime, you know that nothing’s going to change. You feel helpless and that creates rage
against the world, the system, and everything but yourself. Thus you lose your sense of responsibility.
If you don’t take responsibility you lose control of your actions. You’ll feel even more exposed to
circumstance. This enhances your rage and bitterness against the world… Should I go on?
It is a vicious cycle and you will fall deeper and deeper into hating life. Hating your life and hating
yourself go hand in hand. Bad circumstances and unhappiness can make you feel depressed and
powerless. You might feel you’ll never get through this. But then, what’s the point of living?
Even if somebody is successful and rich… and hates what they do, they may have the same thoughts. I
hate my life. There’s no purpose in what I do. I don’t even have the time to spend the money I’ve
earned. What’s the point?
These are not my thoughts dear reader, these are the thoughts of many unhappy people around the
world.
Where’s the way out? How can you find what you love and do it without it leaving a bitter taste in
your mouth?
The answer is simple. Everything you do, do it with 100 percent dedication! Give it your best shot;
you got this!
Why should you do it? Because there is nobody in the world more important than you. I know it
sounds selfish, it may be weird to accept this the first time you hear it, and it is natural to think you
love your spouse or children more than yourself, that you’d give your life for them, but think about
it. How could you give something that you don’t possess.
It’s like when the flight attendant demonstrates the safety regulations. What do they say? Put your life
jacket on first; only then can you help others. You cannot help anybody until you are out of danger.
The same rule applies to love and self-love.
It all begins with a decision. You decide that from this moment you will change your life. So far, the
events and the impact of the environment influenced your everyday life. From now on you will be the
captain. It is simple – but not easy.
Get off the couch and turn off the TV. You must stop dulling yourself and whine no more about your
current situation. Remember, everything that has happened to you today, in this moment, is the result
of your previous decisions and THOUGHTS. Just decide:
ENOUGH!
If you focus on the intelligence types, the development of interpersonal and intrapersonal intelligence
can be especially helpful in keeping you on track with your decisions.
Intelligence can be interpreted as a method of action. Intelligence does not depend on your university
degrees, or your family background or connections. Your intelligence is a result of a way of thinking
and action-oriented approach. The previous chapters talk about this in details.
What do you like to do?
What can you do right now?
What do you need?
These are basic questions that you should be able to answer right now. These answers are most
similar in your optimal intelligence. When you answer only two questions similarly, you face a
situation that requires attention.
Think about it, plan it, and do it! Here and now! Identify what your passion, your needs, and your
potential. Tell yourself: I CAN DO IT NOW!
Now do it. The greatest disappointment you can feel is when you lose credibility in your own eyes.
When a promise is made but isn’t kept, it creates a sense of emptiness, a sense of unfinished business.
And the worst case is when you don’t keep a promise you made for yourself.
And the negative spiral may start up again. It is important to stay credible in your own eyes. Better
start with smaller promises. Today I will walk home instead of taking the bus. Or, this weekend I’ll
have a picnic instead of watching TV. Then work up to the bigger ones like, I’m going to learn to play
the violin.
Remember to build up credibility, take responsibility, and keep promises to yourself. You are number
one. Learn to accept the person you are now. Stop saying, “I’m still bad at something, but…” Forget
this. You are good as you are now. Of course, you can and should improve if you want, but you need
to be able to accept yourself as you are now. If you accept yourself, you’ll be able to love yourself. If
you love yourself, you’ll love your innate abilities and intelligences. If you love them, you’ll love
using them. If you love using them, doors will open where you previously only saw walls. You’ll be
unstoppable!
Chapter 16: Happiness is a decision
If you don’t want to be an unhappy person then stop being an unhappy person. The only person who
has control over your mind is… you. Happiness is mostly a decision. Of course some events may
influence it but at the end of the day you have the choice to focus on the happy events.
If you feel unhappy, search for the cause and change it. In my opinion bad habits are the main reasons
for discontent. The bad habits put you in this unhappy position. You have to replace them with good
habits. Conformity, laziness, greed, fear, procrastination - and I could go on with this list (hours spent
in front of the television, talking nonsense with your buddies, or just aimlessly daydreaming) - are the
results of long-standing habits. Leaving these habits behind takes time.
First, we must learn new things. We cannot make ends meet relying only on our experience. That is an
outdated concept. Be opened to new things. Be persistent and do not give up. Vow to yourself that you
will not give up until you achieve your goal, you passion, what you were born to do!
The length or difficulty of the road ahead can make a lot of people stop before they even cross the
start line. Set off and take the first step. Divide the distance into manageable stages. Do a little bit more
than you’re comfortable with. Undertake a little bit more and keep your commitments. Only in this
way is it possible to begin to develop a new habit that will make you stronger. Believe in yourself.
Believe that you can do it.
The first time you get paid for doing something you love, you may feel guilty. This is because it is
programmed into us that work is the necessary evil that you must do in order to survive. When you
begin to make a living from your hobby, people will tell you things like, “you won’t be able to make
ends meet.” They may tell you it is too risky or that you’ll regret it. Do not listen to them. If you are
true to your heart, you’ve done all the research you need to start your business with as little risk as
possible. Just do it. Just let their remarks go.
This also applies to you. Do not badmouth others. Do not judge others until you have the necessary
information. Ask yourself the question – If I was in his place...? Why should you ask such a question?
Because you are also bothered when others judge you without knowing or thinking about what you
are going through. All that matters is what is good for you and not what people are say.
Learn to love. Love the obstacles because, if you can overcome them, they can show what you are
capable of. You will be stronger. Love the darkness because you know that it co-exists with the light.
Pay attention to the signals from the environment. Everything around you lives and exists. We're part
of a large wholeness. Opportunities are in you; you just have to learn how to take advantage of them.
Your talent, skill, and knowledge is worthless if you do not use it.
Every day you want a bit more than the previous day. Every day you do a little bit more than you did
the day before.
Trace the path you have chosen. There are so many people who start out the same way and ... stop or
give up before the finish line. On bumpy, curvy roads many people lose their faith, their confidence,
and their endurance.
YOU WILL GO ON. Maybe you only have to go until the next turn and there, behind the corner
success is waiting. It is also possible that you need to turn around several bends before you’ll see the
finish line, but you will persevere and get through it your way.
Provisions for your journey…
I could summarize again what I already told you, my dear reader. Everything I told you in this book, I
meant.
This book was inspired by my own metamorphosis. Everything I shared in this book worked for me. I
worked for a good company, for a good salary (relative to my country’s average income). Still I felt
unhappy, trapped, and absorbed in this thing we call the rat race. I felt that at the age of twenty-five all
my life was about bills and getting a better phone, bigger apartment, and cooler clothes.
I worked sometimes thirteen or fourteen hours per day just to collect all the junk I thought I needed to
be happy. Of course, when I finally had the money to buy the stupid, expensive thing I wanted, it didn’t
make me happy. I felt my time was wasted; I didn’t add any value to the world or myself. Deep down I
knew I wasn’t born to be a translator at a multinational company. I hated repeating other people’s
words that I didn’t believe in.
One day I said, “enough is enough!” I turned in my resignation and started doing what I enjoyed --
writing and teaching other people to accept themselves. Right now I feel like I’ve never been happier,
more free, or more satisfied with my life. The transition period wasn’t easy. But it was worth it. I will
never regret choosing me, accepting who I am now, and who I want to be.
I’ll say goodbye with an inspirational quote from Cheryl Strayed. I hope it will help you too.
“Don't surrender all your joy for an idea you used to have about yourself that isn't true
anymore.”
I wish you all the luck in the world in finding your passion, exploring your intelligence, and giving
value to yourself.
If you have any comments, opinions, or simply something to share with me, please feel free to send it
to [email protected].