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Identify the firm and gentle sides of family

LEARNING OUTCOME 9 care that affect a person’s development


during middle and late adolescence

CONTENT: Family Structures and Legacies

ASSESSMENT CRITERIA:
 There are different types of family structures, such as the nuclear
family, the single parents, the grandparent family, the extended
family and the reconstituted family.
 The family life cycle refers to an individual’s emotional and
intellectual life changes from childhood to retirement.
 The family systems theory suggest that family members are
interdependent and cannot be understood in isolation from each
other.
 Families can influence adolescents in both positive and negative
ways.
 Behavioral problems typically arise during adolescence

CONDITION:
Learners must be provided with the following:
1. WORKPLACE LOCATION
2. EQUIPMENT
 Computer, Cellphone(With Internet Connection)
3.TOOLS, ACCESSORIES AND SUPPLIES
 Notebook
 Paper
 Pen
4. LEARNING RESOURCES
 Internet Connection Or Book Suggested By The Teacher
 Module In Personal Development
 Curriculum Guide Of Personal Development

ASSESSMENT METHOD:
 Written Test
 Activities (Individual Work)
 Performance Test

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LEARNING EXPERIENCES
Learning Outcome 9
Identify the firm and gentle sides of family care that affect a person’s
development during middle and late adolescence
Learning Activities Special Instructions

Read Information Sheet no. 8 After reading Information Sheet, Answer


Family Structures and Legacies the Self-Check no. 9.1to ensure the
knowledge in
Family Structures and Legacies
Answer Self-Check no. 9.1 Compare the answer on the answer key
Family Structures and Legacies
Perform Job Sheet no. 9.2 Evaluate Performance Criteria using Job
My Genogram Sheet no. 9.2

Accomplish Task Sheet no. 9.3 Evaluate Performance Criteria using Job
Emotional, Social and Spiritual Legacy Sheet no. 9.3

Accomplish Task Sheet 9.4 Evaluate Performance Criteria using Job


My Family, My Love Sheet no. 9.4

Information Sheet 9

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Family Structures and Legacies
Learning Objectives: After reading the information sheet, you must be
able: Objectives:
 appraise their family structure and the type of care they give and
receive,
which may help in understanding themselves better ,
 make a genogram and trace certain physical, personality, or
behavioral
attributes through generations, and
 prepare a plan on how to make their family members firmer and
gentler
with each other.

FAMILY STRUCTURE
The traditional family structure is considered a family support system which
involves two married individuals providing care and stability for their biological
offspring.
However, this two-parent, nuclear family has become less prevalent, and
alternative
family forms have become more common. The family is created at birth and
establishes
ties across generations. Those generations, the extended family of aunts, uncles,
grandparents, and cousins, can all hold significant emotional and economic roles
for the
nuclear family.

Different kinds of family structures:


 Nuclear family: A family unit consisting of at most a father, mother and
dependent children. It is considered the “traditional” family.
 Extended family: A family consisting of parents and children, along with
grandparents, grandchildren, aunts or uncles, cousins etc. In some
circumstances, the extended family comes to live either with or in place of a
member of the nuclear family.
 Step families: Two families brought together due to divorce, separation, and
remarriage.
 Single parent family: This can be either a father or a mother who is singly
responsible for the raising of a child. The child can be by birth or adoption. They
may be a single parent by choice or by life circumstances. The other parent may
have been part of the family at one time or not at all.
 Adoptive family: A family where one or more of the children has been
adopted. Any structure of family may also be an adoptive family.
 Bi-racial or multi-racial family: A family where the parents are members of
different racial identity groups.
 Trans-racial adoptive family: A family where the adopted child is of a
different racial identity group than the parents.

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 Blended family: A family that consists of members from two (or more)
previous families.
 Conditionally separated families: A family member is separated from the
rest of the family. This may be due to employment far away; military service;
incarceration; hospitalization. They remain significant members of the family.
 Foster family: A family where one or more of the children is legally a
temporary member of the household. This “temporary” period may be as short as
a few days or as long as the child’s entire childhood.
 Gay or Lesbian family: A family where one or both of the parents’ sexual
orientation is gay or lesbian. This may be a two-parent family, an adoptive family,
a single parent family or an extended family.
 Immigrant family: A family where the parents have immigrated to another
country as adults. Their children may or may not be immigrants. Some family
members may continue to live in the country of origin, but still be significant
figures in the life of the child.
 Migrant family: A family that moves regularly to places where they have
employment. The most common form of migrant family is farm workers who
move with the crop seasons. Children may have a relatively stable community of
people who move at the same time - or the family may know no one in each new
setting. Military families may also lead a migrant life, with frequent relocation,
often on short notice.

GENOGRAM
A genogram or family tree is a useful tool to gather information about a person's
family. This visual representation of a family can help us to identify patterns or
themes within families that may be influencing or driving a person's current
behavior.
Symbols for drawing the genogram or family tree:

INSPIRING STORIES OF FAMILIES

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What does it mean to put others’ first before ourselves? A doctor entered the
hospital in a hurry after being called in for an urgent surgery. He answered the
call ASAP, changed his clothes & went directly to the surgery block. He found the
boy’s father pacing in the hall waiting for the doctor. On seeing him, the dad
yelled: “Why did you take all this time to come? Don’t you know that my son’s life
is in danger? Don’t you have any sense of responsibility?” The doctor smiled &
said: “I am sorry, I wasn’t in the hospital & I came as fast as I could after
receiving the call… And now, I wish you’d calm down so that I can do my work.”
“Calm down? What if your son was in this room right now, would you calm down?
If your own son dies now what will you do?” said the father angrily. The doctor
smiled again & replied: “… Doctors cannot prolong lives. Go and intercede for
your son, we will do our best by God’s grace”. “Giving advises when we’re not
concerned is so easy,” murmured the father. The surgery took some hours after
which the doctor went out happy, “Your son is saved!”. And without waiting for
the father’s reply, he carried on his way running. “If you have any questions, ask
the nurse!!”
“Why is he so arrogant? He couldn’t wait some minutes so that I can ask about
my son’s state,” commented the father when seeing the nurse minutes after the
doctor left.
The nurse answered, tears coming down her face: “His son died yesterday in a
road accident, he was at the burial when we called him for your son’s surgery.
And now that he saved your son’s life, he left running to finish his son’s burial.”

Give time to our family


After 21 years of marriage, my wife wanted me to take another woman out to
dinner and a movie. She said, “I love you, but I know this other woman loves you
and would love to
spend some time with you.” The other woman that my wife wanted me to visit
was my MOTHER, who has been a widow for 19 years, but the demands of my
work and my three children had made it possible to visit her only occasionally.
That night I called to invite her to go out for dinner and a movie. “What’s wrong,
are you well?” she asked. My mother is the type of woman who suspects that a
late night call or a surprise invitation is a sign of bad news. “I thought that it would
be pleasant to spend some time with you,” I responded. “Just the two of us.” She
thought about it for a moment, and then said, “I would like that very much.”That
Friday after work, as I drove over to pick her up I was a bit nervous. When I
arrived at her house, I noticed that she, too, seemed to be nervous about our
date. She waited in the door with her coat on. She had curled her hair and was
wearing the dress that she had worn to celebrate her last wedding anniversary.
She smiled from a face that was as radiant as an angel’s. “I told my friends that I
was going to go out with my son, and they were impressed, “she said, as she got
into the car. “They can’t wait to hear about our meeting.” We went to a restaurant
that, although not elegant, was very nice and cozy. My mother took my arm as if
she were the First Lady. After we sat down, I had to read the menu. Her eyes
could only read large print. Half way through the entries, I lifted my eyes and saw
Mom sitting there staring at me. A nostalgic smile was on her lips. “It was I who

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used to have to read the menu when you were small,” she said. “Then it’s time
that you relax and let me return the favor,” I responded. During the dinner, we
had an agreeable conversation – nothing extraordinary but catching up on recent
events of each other’s life. We talked so
much that we missed the movie. As we arrived at her house later, she said, “I’ll
go out with you again, but only if you let me invite you.” I agreed. “How was your
dinner date?” asked my wife when I got home. “Very nice. Much more so than I
could have imagined,” I answered. A few days later, my mother died of a massive
heart attack. It happened so suddenly that I didn’t have a chance to do anything
for her. Some time later, I received an envelope with a copy of a restaurant
receipt from the same place mother and I had dined. An attached note said: “I
paid this bill in advance. I wasn’t sure that I could be there; but nevertheless, I
paid for two plates – one for you and the other for your wife. You will never know
what that night meant for me. I love you, son.”
At that moment, I understood the importance of saying in time: “I LOVE YOU”
and to give our loved ones the time that they deserve. Nothing in life is more
important than your family. Give them the time they deserve, because these
things cannot be put off till “some other time.”

FAMILY LEGACIES
No matter who we are, where we live, or what our goals may be, we all have one
thing in common: a heritage. That is, a social, emotional and spiritual legacy
passed on from parent to child. Every one of us is passed a heritage, lives out a
heritage, and gives a heritage to our family. It's not an option. Parents always
pass to their children a legacy … good, bad or some of both. A spiritual,
emotional and social legacy is like a three-stranded cord. Individually, each
strand cannot hold much weight. But wrapped together, they are strong. That's
why passing on a positive, affirming legacy is so important and why a negative
legacy can be so destructive. The good news is that you can decide to pass a
positive legacy on to your children whether you received one or not.
Today, if we don't intentionally pass a legacy consistent with our beliefs to our
children, our culture will pass along its own, often leading to a negative end. It is
important to remember that passing on a spiritual, emotional and social legacy is
a process, not an event. As parents, we are responsible for the process. God is
responsible for the product.
The Emotional Legacy
In order to prosper, our children need an enduring sense of security and stability
nurtured in an environment of safety and love. Sadly, many of us struggle to
overcome a negative emotional legacy that hinders our ability to cope with the
inevitable struggles of life. But imagine yourself giving warm family memories to
your child. You can create an atmosphere that provides a child's fragile spirit with
the nourishment and support needed for healthy emotional growth. It will require
time and consistency to develop a sense of emotional wholeness, but the
rewards are great.
A strong emotional legacy:
• Provides a safe environment in which deep emotional roots can grow.

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• Fosters confidence through stability.
• Conveys a tone of trusting support.
• Nurtures a strong sense of positive identity.
• Creates a “resting place” for the soul.
• Demonstrates unconditional love.

Which characteristics would you like to build into the legacy you pass along to
your children? Even if you don't hit the exact mark, setting up the right target is
an important first step.

The Social Legacy


To really succeed in life, our children need to learn more than management
techniques, accounting, reading, writing and geometry. They need to learn the
fine art of relating to people. If they learn how to relate well to others, they'll have
an edge in the game of life.
In order to prosper, our children need to gain the insights and social skills
necessary to cultivate healthy, stable relationships. As children mature, they
must learn to relate to family members, teachers, peers and friends. Eventually
they must learn to relate to coworkers and many other types of people such as
salespeople, bankers, mechanics and bosses. Nowhere can appropriate social
interaction and relationships be demonstrated more effectively than in the home.
At home you learned — and your children will learn — lessons about respect,
courtesy, love and involvement. Our modeling as parents plays a key role in
passing on a strong social legacy.
Key building blocks of children's social legacy include:
 Respect, beginning with themselves and working out to other people.
 Responsibility, fostered by respect for themselves, that is cultivated by
assigning children duties within the family, making them accountable
for their actions, and giving them room to make wrong choices once in
a while.
 Unconditional love and acceptance by their parents, combined with
conditional acceptance when the parents discipline for bad behavior or
actions.
 The setting of social boundaries concerning how to relate to God,
authority, peers, the environment and siblings.
 Rules that are given within a loving relationship

The Spiritual Legacy


The Spiritual Legacy is overlooked by many, but that's a mistake. As spiritual
beings, we adopt attitudes and beliefs about spiritual matters from one source or
another. As parents, we need to take the initiative and present our faith to our
children. Parents who successfully pass along a spiritual legacy to their children
model and reinforce the unseen realities of the godly life. We must recognize that
passing a spiritual legacy means more than encouraging our children to attend
church, as important as that is. The church is there to support parents in raising
their children but it cannot do the raising; only parents can.

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The same principle applies to spiritual matters. Parents are primary in spiritual
upbringing, not secondary. This is especially true when considering that children,
particularly young children, perceive God the way they perceive their parents. If
their parents are loving, affirming, forgiving and yet strong in what they believe,
children will think of God that way. He is someone who cares, who is principled
and who loves them above all else.
The Legacy You Want to Give
We all have good and bad parts to the legacy we have inherited. The key is to
move forward from here. For some, taking a closer look at the legacy they've
been given helps them assess the legacy they want to pass on. After considering
your past, here are some practical tips for the future:

Decide what you'll keep


You probably have things you received that are wonderful and need to be kept
and passed on. Other things may need to be thrown out. Or, perhaps you have a
weak legacy that needs strengthening. Whatever you received, you can now
intentionally pass along the good. This isn't always easy. If you saw hypocrisy in
your parents' lives, you may be tempted to throw everything out even though
much of what your parents modeled was good. Don't. That would be like burning
down the house to get rid of some bugs. Realize that there is a being who can
redeem even the "bad stuff" in your legacy.
Unfortunately many of us have parts of our legacy that are weak or even awful.
Maybe one of your parents was an alcoholic or abusive or didn't provide the
nurturing you needed. In today's society, the stories of such families are
common. You may be asking, "How do I give something I didn't receive? Nobody
modeled this stuff for me."
Hope is not lost. Consider the story of Josiah from the Old Testament in the
Bible. His father and grandfather were involved in many wicked things, including
idol worship that threatened the entire nation. But after 8-year-old Josiah became
king of Judah, he reversed that trend. He sought God and purged Judah of idols,
repaired the temple and saved a nation.
Like Josiah, you can choose which things in your legacy are no good and throw
them away. It's important to break the cycle of hurt by leaving bad things behind
and creating a new legacy. Legacies are not easily broken and always benefit
from His guidance.
Chart a new course as you begin a positive legacy for yourself and those you
love. Research suggests that most fathers will parent the way they were
parented. That means only a minority of fathers will change their parenting style
— even if their parenting is wrong! Today, you can take positive steps to design a
new heritage for yourself and your family.

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SELF-CHECK 9.1

Directions: Identify what is being asked in each sentence. Write your


answer on a clear bond paper.
_______________1. It is a family unit consisting of at most a father, mother and
dependent children. It is considered the “traditional” family.
_______________2. It is a family consisting of parents and children, along with
grandparents, grandchildren, aunts or uncles, cousins etc
_______________3. These are two families brought together due to divorce,
separation, and remarriage.
_______________4. This can be either a father or a mother who is singly
responsible for the raising of a child.
_______________5. It is a family where one or more of the children has been
adopted. Any structure of family may also be an adoptive family.
_______________6. It is a family where the parents are members of different
racial identity groups.
_______________7. It is a family where the adopted child is of a different racial
identity group than the parents.
_______________8. It is a family that consists of members from two (or more)
previous families.
_______________9. It is a family member is separated from the rest of the
family. This may be due to employment far away; military service; incarceration;
hospitalization.
_______________10. It is a family where one or more of the children is legally a
temporary member of the household.
_______________11. It is a family where one or both of the parents’ sexual
orientation is gay or lesbian.
_______________12. It is a family where the parents have immigrated to
another country as adults.
_______________13. It is a family that moves regularly to places where they
have employment.
_______________14. It is a useful tool to gather information about a person's
family.

B. True or False
Direction: Write TRUE if the statement is correct and FALSE if it is not.
_______________1. The main purpose of parenting is to make their children
independent.
_______________2. One can still catch up with the family life cycle if he misses
the challenge at one stage.
_______________3. When the daughter gets married due unexpected
pregnancy, she messes up the family cycle.
_______________4. Parents can no longer shape their adolescents behaviours.

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_______________5. Filipino families usually have an extended type of family
structure.

C. Enumerate the following.


1-5 Common issues among adolescents and their families
6-15 Family Structures
16-20 Family Legacies

JOB SHEET No. 9.2

Title : My Genogram

Performance Objective: To make a genogram and trace certain physical,


personality, or behavioral attributes through generations.

Supplies/Materials : Laptop, cell phone, pen, bond paper

Steps/Procedure
Draw your family tree and make it as comprehensive as you can(include your
grandparents, grand aunts, grand uncles, great grandparents, etc.) label the
family members you are most alike physically and personality wise as well as
the family members you are most different physically and personality wise.
What outstanding quality of your family did you discover?
Use the rubric below as a guide.

Description Score Score obtained


Content provided are correct and appropriate 5
Sufficient elaboration of key ideas and 5
examples are provided
The essay is clear and organized. 3
Grammar and usage are correct 2
Total 15

TASK SHEET No. 9.3

Title : EMOTIONAL, SOCIAL AND SPIRITUAL LEGACY

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Performance Objective: To appraise your family legacy and the type of
care you give and receive, which may help in understanding yourself better.

Supplies/Materials : Laptop, cell phone, pen, bond paper

Steps/Procedure
Emotional Legacy Evaluation
Answer each question by writing in your journal the number that best reflects
the legacy you have received from your parents. Then add up your score.
1. When you walked into your house, what was your feeling?
1 Dread 4 Stability
2 Tension 5 Calm
3 Chaos 6 Warmth

2. Which word best describes the tone of your home?


1 Hateful 4 Serious
2 Angry 5 Relaxed
3 Sad 6 Fun

3. What was the message of your family life?


1 You are worthless. 4 You are respected.
2 You are a burden. 5 You are important.
3 You are okay. 6 You are the greatest.

4. Which word best describes the "fragrance" of your home life?


1 Repulsive 4 Sterile
2 Rotten 5 Fresh
3 Unpleasant 6 Sweet

5. Which was most frequent in your home?


1 An intense fight 4 A strong disagreement
2 The silent treatment 5 A kind word
3 Detached apathy 6 An affectionate hug

Results:
Above 24 = Strong emotional legacy
19 – 24 = Healthy legacy
14 – 18 = Mixed legacy - good and bad elements
10 - 13 = Weak emotional legacy
Below 10 = Damaged emotional legacy

Social Legacy Evaluation


Answer each question by writing in your journal the number that best reflects
the legacy you have received from your parents. Then add up your score.

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1. Which words most closely resemble the social tone of your family?
1 Cruel and abusive 4 Non-communicative but stable
2 Cutting sarcasm 5 Secure with open communication
3 Chaotic and distant 6 Loving and fun

2. What was the message of your home life with regard to relationships?
1 "Step on others to get your way." 4 “Mind your own business.”
2 "Hurt them if they hurt you." 5 “Treat others with respect.”
3 "Demand your rights." 6 “Put others before yourself.”

3. How were rules set and enforced in your home?


1 Independent of relationship 4 Inconsistently
2 In reaction to parental stress 5 Out of concern for my well-being
3 Dictatorially 6 In the context of a loving
relationship

4. Which word best characterizes the tone of communication in your


home?
1 Shouting 4 Clear
2 Manipulation 5 Constructive
3 Confusing 6 Courteous

5. How did your family deal with wrong behavior?


1 Subtle reinforcement 4 Severe punishment
2 Accepted in the name of love 5 Discussion
3 Guilt trip 6 Loving, firm discipline

Results:
Above 24 = Strong social legacy
19 - 24 = Healthy legacy
14 - 18 = Mixed legacy — good and bad elements
10 - 13 = Weak social legacy
Below 10 = Damaged social legacy

Spiritual Legacy Evaluation


Answer each question by writing in your journal the number that best reflects
the legacy you have received from your parents. Then add up your score.
1. To what degree were spiritual principles incorporated into daily family
life?
1 Never 4 Frequently
2 Rarely 5 Almost always
3 Sometimes 6 Consistently

2. Which word captures the tone of how you learned to view/relate to


God?
1 Absent 4 Casual

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2 Adversarial 5 Solemn
3 Fearful 6 Intimate

3. How would you summarize your family's level of participation in


spiritual activities?
1 Nonexistent 4 Regimental
2 Rare 5 Active
3 Occasional 6 Enthusiastic

4. How were spiritual discussions applied in your home?


1 They weren't 4 To teach
2 To control 5 To influence
3 To manipulate 6 To reinforce

5. What was the perspective in your home regarding moral absolutes?


1 If it feels good, do it! 4 Dogmatic legalism
2 There are no absolutes. 5 Moderate conservatism
3 Let your heart guide you. 6 Clear boundaries

Results:
Above 24 = Strong spiritual legacy
19 - 24 = Healthy legacy
14 - 18 = Mixed legacy — good and bad elements
10 - 13 = Weak spiritual legacy
Below 10 = Damaged spiritual legacy
Reactions to the Emotional, Social and Spiritual Legacy Evaluation
1. What were your scores in the emotional, social and spiritual legacy
evaluation?
2. How do these scores reflect you home atmosphere?
3. What is the legacy you have received from your parents and siblings?
4. How do you plan to give a legacy when you start your own family in the
future?
Use the rubric below as a guide.
Description Score Score
obtained
Content provided are correct and 5
appropriate
Sufficient elaboration of key ideas and 5
examples are provided
The essay is clear and organized. 3
Grammar and usage are correct 2
Total 15

TASK SHEET No. 9.4

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Title : My Family, My Love

Performance Objective: To prepare a plan on how to make your family


members firmer and gentler with each other.

Supplies/Materials : Laptop, cellphone, pen, bond paper

Steps/Procedure
 Write a plan on how to make your family members firmer and gentler
with each other.
 Make two five-line poems about your family.
Follow this pattern:
First line is _____ family
Second line is two adjectives (joined by and) which describe the noun
Third line is a verb and an adverb to describe the noun in action
Fourth line begins with like and presents a comparison
Fifth line starts with if only and expresses a wish.

Example:
(___ family) Mine family
(adjective + adjective) Unique and chaotic
(verb + adverb) Changing constantly
(like) Like flaming hot Thai dishes, which are quite exotic
(if only) If only we could relive our family life, of jolly years gone

Use the rubric below as a guide.


Description Score Score obtained
Content provided are correct and appropriate 5
Sufficient elaboration of key ideas and 5
examples are provided
The essay/line is clear and organized. 3
Grammar and usage are correct 2
Total 15

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