DIVORCE SHOULD NOT BE LEGALIZED (PLEASE SEARCH AND

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(Two completely opposite divorce bills are pending in the House of Representatives. Marikina’s Rep.
Marcelino Teodoro filed an “Anti-Divorce and Unlawful Dissolution of Marriage Act,” seeking to
guarantee a ban on any law facilitating or recognizing divorce. Another bill coauthored by Gabriela
Representatives Luzviminda Ilagan and Emerenciana de Jesus would amend the Family Code to include a
divorce provision. It is backed by no less than Speaker Feliciano Belmonte. Following the enactment of
the reproductive health law, the divorce bills promise to stir up a new controversy involving the Catholic
Church and its supporters. Below is an op-ed supporting the legalization of divorce. This won’t be the
last we’ll hear on the subject from either side. –Editors)

People who say that divorce is not advisable for the Philippines forget or ignore our history. The ethno-
linguistic communities of the Philippine archipelago before the Spanish conquest practiced divorce. We
had a divorce law from 1917 until August 30, 1950, when the Civil Code of 1950 took effect. The latter
law prohibited divorce for Filipinos, and the prohibition continues under the present Family Code. But
Muslim Filipinos have always practiced divorce, which Philippine law allowed. Today, divorce continues
to be available to Muslim Filipinos under the Code of Muslim Personal Law of the Philippines
(Presidential Decree No. 1083), promulgated in 1977.

So to say that divorce does not exist in present Philippine law is not accurate. The prohibition against
divorce under Philippine law applies only to Filipinos whose marriages are not governed by the Muslim
Code. Since Philippine law on marriage applies to all Filipino citizens even though they are residing in a
foreign country, the prohibition against divorce for non-Muslim Filipinos is also a concern of Filipino
expatriates.

We are the only country in the world that has no divorce law for all its citizens regardless of religious
belief or affiliation.

Some think that we do not need a divorce law because the Family Code, which applies to non-Muslim
Filipinos, already provides for the termination of marriages through “annulment.” This argument
misleads. Annulment is a legal term that has a specific meaning. The remedy of annulment is based on
specified grounds that occurred at the time of the celebration of the marriage, such as lack of parental
consent and vitiated consent (as when a person married another at gunpoint). The remedy of
annulment expires, and the defect may actually be cured by ratification through free and voluntary
cohabitation.

Pending Bill
A divorce bill has been pending in the House of Representatives for the last six years, sponsored by the
representatives of the Gabriela Women’s Party. The bill lists five grounds for divorce, among them:
when the spouses have been separated in fact for at least five years or have been legally separated for
at least two years, and their reconciliation is highly improbable; when any of the grounds recognized by
law for legal separation has caused the irreparable breakdown of the marriage. The bill has not
progressed beyond the Committee level because the energies of many were focused on the
reproductive health bill that was recently passed into law.

There is no more time to pass a divorce law in the current Congress since elections are scheduled in
May. But the bill will be filed again in the next Congress. Can it pass? Yes, definitely, eventually, with the
support of enlightened Filipinos. The lesson we have learned from past initiatives is that a relevant and
much-needed measure that has strong popular support will pass. Just as sustained citizen support
carried the day for the reproductive health bill, so too will strong popular support make possible the
enactment of a divorce law. People have to make their voices heard in support of the divorce bill.

It is time to give the remedy of divorce to those who need it, even as we respect the decision of those
who want to stay married despite their miserable marital life. To be sure, the Catholic Church will be the
staunchest opponent of the divorce bill. It will once again argue against the bill on moral grounds. It will
invoke the constitutional provision directing the State to protect marriage and the family, and another
that refers to the sanctity of family life. But these constitutional provisions were never intended to
prohibit Congress from legalizing divorce.

Church Need Not Worry

The Catholic Church need not worry. The institutions of marriage and the family have survived to this
day, as they will survive a Philippine divorce law. We are a secular state, where no religious group has
the right to define law or policy for the entire population. There is not one but a plurality of beliefs in
Philippine society. The law should only give people a choice, to be exercised according to their own
personal beliefs.

Every day, Filipinos get married, bear children, separate and get into other relationships, regardless of
what the law says. The lack of a divorce law for non-Muslim Filipinos complicates further the marital and
family problems of many Filipinos. Our government has clearly failed to respond to their needs. If the
country wants to move forward, it has to confront the realities of marital and family life of Filipinos in
the Philippines and abroad. It has to pass a divorce law now.

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 CURRENT LAWS THAT ALLOW FOR LEGAL SEPARATIONS AND ANNULMENTS ARE FLAWED.

For couples who want to dissolve their union or live apart, there are two options: legal separation and annulment. A
legal separation allows a couple to divide their properties and live apart, but it does not dissolve their marriage, i.e.,
they cannot re-marry. In annulments and declaration of nullity of marriage, you have to prove that the marriage was
invalid from the start according to a certain set of reasons such as impotence, homosexuality, mistaken identity, or
psychological incapacity, among others. 

Both are options are flawed. In legal separations, everything but the marriage is dissolved. Quite literally, the couple
remains married only on paper. In an annulment, you must prove that your reason for wanting to nullify the marriage
existed even before the marriage--this requires one to declare and prove that his or her partner is incapable of
functioning as wife or husband. 

The idea of couples wanting to end their marriages is not a new to Filipinos. As women’s rights advocate Beth
Angsioco wrote in her column, "We already have laws for those who only want property settlement, and those with
void and voidable marriages. Why not a law for valid but failed marriages?"

DIVORCE USED TO EXIST IN THE PHILIPPINES

According to Atty. Fred Pamaos, the Philippines once had a law on divorce. “Before the Spanish colonial rule in the
early 16th century, absolute divorce had been widely practiced among our ancestral tribes—the Tagbanwas of
Palawan, the Gadang of Nueva Vizcaya, the Sagada and Igorot of the Cordilleras, the Manobo, Bila-an and Moslems of
Visayas and Mindanao islands, to name a few.” 

During the American period and Japanese occupation, some form of divorce was already in place. It was actually the
1950 Civil Code of the Philippines that abolished these laws.

THERE ARE SECTORS IN PHILIPPINE SOCIETY THAT PRACTICE DIVORCE.

The Code of Muslim Personal Laws of the Philippines allows for divorce—however, with stipulations: namely, a man
can divorce his wife, but a woman cannot divorce her husband. 

IT IS A RECOURSE FOR WOMEN WHO ARE IN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIPS.

According to the Philippine Commission on Women website, “physical injuries and/or wife battering remains to be
the most prevalent case across the twelve-year period, from 1997–2009, accounting nearly half (45.5 percent) of all
reported violence against women (VAW) cases nationwide.” 
 
In the Philippines, spousal abuse and infidelity are not grounds for the annulment of marriage.

THE STIPULATIONS OF AN ANNULMENT ARE DESTRUCTIVE.

The most commonly used reason for an annulment is “psychological incapacity.” It requires that you prove that your
spouse (or both of you) is indeed psychologically incapable of performing the responsibilities that come with being
married. In legal terms, that means presenting evidence that proves this allegation. To back up your claim, you need
to get a psychological report which can be expensive.

PEOPLE ARE IN FAVOR OF DIVORCE.

According to a Social Weather Station survey conducted in March 2011, “50 percent of adult Filipinos agree and 33
percent disagree with the statement: 'Married couples who have already separated and cannot reconcile anymore
should be allowed to divorce so that they can get legally married again.’” In 2005, a similar survey was conducted
which showed that 43 percent of adult Filipinos were in favor of divorce and 44 percent were not.

This shows that the public, regardless of their marital status, is now more open to accept the possibility of divorce.

AN ANNULMENT IS AN EXPENSIVE PROCESS THAT NOT EVERYONE CAN AFFORD.

The cost of proving grounds for an annulment, such as psychological incapacity, requires the hiring of specialists and
the like, which can cost thousands of pesos--not something everyone can afford.
Clare Padilla, Executive Director of EnGenderights, an NGO that provides legal services, pointed out that the current
situation [no clear law on divorce] puts wives in abusive relationships in a bind: “Many women end up cohabiting
with their current partner without having their marriage nullified. And because of this, some women are dismissed
from government service precisely because of these 'immorality issues.'” 

DIVORCE DOES NOT DESTROY THE FAMILY.

Divorce—on any law, for that matter—will not destroy the family. It is only the members of the family who can do
that. Putting a clear divorce law in place recognizes that some marriages work and some don’t. In cases where a union
is more harmful than beneficial, a divorce can be a benevolent and less hurtful way of severing ties with your partner. 

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the-philippines

DIVORCE SHOULD BE LEGALIZED (PLEASE SEARCH AND MAKE

In this debate, MUSLIMS are not included because under the SHARIAH LAW they can have DIVORCE in
the PHILIPPINES.

Divorce mostly comes in, when couples have conflict and they have a problem.Divorce is one of the
solution in separating couples, for the Wife and husband can have freedom.

Divorce is better than having conflict in the fight in the family. It is the best solution for the family when
having conflicts. Like our neighbor, (this is an evidence) the wife and husband had a conflict between
them. But the husband had a power, he hurt the wife so this affects the children. This will not be good
for them, so the family decided to be separated. But because they were MUSLIMS they had a divorce.
This is an example of having a divorce. This only means that DIVORCE IS A BEST SOLUTION FOR A
FAMILY THAT HAVE BEEN IN A CONFLICT.

In divorce, there will be no conflict in the process. In choosing where will the children go, the family and
their Lawyers will decide. Not only the child but also the properties. This will be a good solution for them
for them not to have quarrel and the children will not be affected.

Divorce
•
1) n. the termination of a marriage by legal action, requiring a petition or complaint for divorce (or
dissolution in some states, including California) by one party. Some states still require at least a minimal
showing of fault, but no-fault divorce is now the rule in which "incompatibility" is sufficient to grant a
divorce. The substantive issues in divorces are division of property, child custody and support, alimony
(spousal support), child visitation and attorney's fees. Only state courts have jurisdiction over divorces, so
the petitioning or complaining party can only file in the state in which he/she is and has been a resident
for a period of time (as little as six weeks in Nevada). In most states the period from original filing for
divorce, serving the petition on the other party and final judgment (or decree) takes several months to
allow for a chance to reconcile.

•By definition divorce is a legislatively created, judicially administered process that legally terminates a
marriage no longer considered viable by one or both of the spouses. Divorce is also known as dissolution
of marriage. Traditionally, divorce was fault based. In other words, there was an "innocent or injured"
party and a party that had done "wrong" with the "innocent" party being able to obtain relief or a
divorce. This system was adversarial in nature. Even if both parties wanted a divorce, one party had to
allege wrongdoing by the other. In the 1970's this system was reformed and a "no fault" system was put
in place.

There are advantages to doing your own divorce. You might think the most obvious is the financial
savings. Don't be fooled. A poorly structured settlement agreement can be more costly to correct after
the fact. Keep in mind that this agreement will:
•Divide your property as well as your debts.
•Decide parenting issues such as custody, visitation, and child support.
•Determine if alimony applies and the amount be paid.
•

If Children Are Involved:

Divorce in itself is trying enough. If children are involved, it becomes even more trying and extremely
emotional. Parents often loose sight of what is in the best interest of their children. Where do the
children fit into this whole new life that is being created? Unfortunately, children often become financial
pawns in a divorce when child custody issues are being decided.

Children have rights in divorce. Let common sense prevail when it comes to the children. They should not
be used as an outlet for anger, nor should they ever be used to get revenge against your spouse. Don't
bad-mouth your ex-spouse in front of your kids, even if you are still angry or feuding. Try not to use your
kids as a messenger or go-between, especially when you're feuding. Children are egocentric. They think
their role in things is much more important than it really is. Because of this, they often feel that they
have in some way caused the divorce. Make sure they know it is not their fault. It is also important for
kids to know that just because parents divorce each other, they're not divorcing their kids. Some kids
think that if their parents are divorcing, it means their moms and dads will want to leave them, too.
Remind them often that your love for them is unconditional and will not change because of the divorce.

There are many aspects of divorce that need to be considered including: custody and visitation; financial
issues such as alimony and child support, taxes, pensions and insurance; hiring an attorney or mediator;
determining if you should do your own divorce; separation agreements and much more.

Alimony - Comprehensive guide to the different types of alimony, including the criteria generally used in
the determination and amount of alimony, and tax ramifications.

Child Custody - Reviews the different types of child custody. The emotional (for both child and parent)
and financial points of view of a custody battle are also discussed including court ordered professional
custody evaluations.

The best solution for having separation is divorce.

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Addictive Marriage

Sometimes we get trapped in such toxic relationships that they not only hurt our self esteem
but also make us lose our self confidence. Many people tend to get caught in marriages which
become addictive that they don’t even realize that they are been physically or emotionally
abused.

Remaining in a bad abusive marriage not only causes stress, but even clouds your life with
frustration, emptiness and despair. It can be depressing and make you feel drained out. This is
what happens in addictive relationships in marriages, says Robert Hemfelt in Love Is A Choice:
Breaking the Cycle Of Addictive Relationships, “Addicts become so elaborately enmeshed in the
other person that the sense of self- personal identity is severely restricted, crowded out by that
other person’s identity and problems. Such people struggle relentlessly to fill the great
emotional vacuum within them. Some people know that the relationship is not good for them,
but despite the pain and sufferings they want to carry on with it.” One part of them wants to go
out of the relationship, but the remaining part refuses or feels helpless to take any drastic
action.

Divorce And Kids

Partners sometimes stay in bad marriages for the sake of the kids. But this can be a terrible
mistake on their part if there is abuse involved. By doing this parents generally put a mental
burden on the children. Bringing up a child in an unhealthy environment where parents are
always fighting and trying to put each other down is not a good example that you set for your
kids. But marriage experts believe that each marriage has different issues and if the problem
can be solved amicably, there is no need for divorce.

However a study conducted by sociologist Linda Waite at the University of Chicago suggests
that staying together is good for the development of children. She mentions in, The Case for
Marriage that “most current divorces leave children worse off, educationally and financially,
than they would have been if their parents stayed married, and a majority of divorces leave
children psychologically worse off as well. Only a minority of divorces are taking place in
families where children are likely to benefit in any way from their parents’ separation. I do not
advocate divorce as a first step when a marriage is going awry. There are always ups and downs
in marriages. Any one can manage life during good times. It is getting through the bad times
that makes or breaks a relationship.”

When parents get divorced children definitely are the worst affected. Life becomes very
uncertain for kids. The sense of security and stability completely vanishes. They are made to
choose a parent whom they wish to stay with and they cannot live with both the parents even if
they want to. Overnight one of the parents becomes a visitor and they have no other choice,
but accept this cruel reality of life. The child goes through traumatic stress if parents are always
fighting and arguing with each other.

Divorce And Insecurity In Kids

“Children ought not to be victims of the choices adults make for them,” said Wade
Horn (U.S. Assistant Secretary for Children and Families under President George W. Bush).

Divorce is a sad topic and can be devastating for the children as their lives revolve around
their parents. It is sad that often parents do not realize it. 

“From the time of conception it is the parents who influence a child’s development. It is the
parents’ behavior towards each other that leaves a lasting impression on the children. It is the
duty of the parents to deal maturely with this delicate relationship that is marriage and not to
fight with each other in front of their children. When you have kids it is time for the parents to
be selfless and not to be spiteful and selfish,” says psychologist, Dr. Anjali Chabria. 

Children get hurt when they see their world and their home breaking into pieces in front of
their eyes. They always feel that they are a part of an incomplete family and it becomes all the
more traumatic when a parent remarries. They again have to adjust with new developments
such as accommodating a new parent in their lives.

Parenting Responsibility 

“My experience is that divorce is almost always unilateral. It’s not a democracy. One person
gets to decide the fate of not only the marriage but the family,” said Michelle Weiner
Davis, 

Most marriage experts agree that though divorce is no doubt very painful for kids, to stay in an
abusive and unhealthy marriage is also not a very good environment to bring up kids. But when
you have kids it is not easy to walk out of the marriage completely. Couples need to understand
that when they have children they cannot get rid of each other completely no matter how much
they want to.

Divorced couples should realize that even though they are not married to each other anymore
they should have a shared healthy parenting. Children should be given the freedom to spend
enough time with both the parents. Children’s education should be well taken care by both the
parents. At the same time emotional needs of the children should not be ignored no matter
what happens. A new research says that divorce can hamper children’s education and mental
health. The rates of children dropping out from schools are much more amongst kids from
divorced parents than those whose parents stay together.

If the marriage did not work out so the kids should not be blamed for it and hence all decisions
should be taken keeping the kid’s future in mind. When parents get divorced it does not mean
that they have to hate each other. They can be friends too at least for the well-being of the
children.

Read more: Divorce: Pros and

Technically speaking, divorce by definition nullifies marriage. For me, it defeats the purpose of getting
married. In a wider sense, We do not approve of divorce because there is annulment and we believe it is
enough if marriage is not working between the couple. Divorce would be the primary hindrance in
promoting family values. The problem is women and children are constantly getting abused, so if that is
the case, will separation be enough? I believe if we really want to end the problem regarding abuses, we
should rather penalize the wrong actions. But most of all, uplifting morals and values would be the long
term key towards this problem.

According to my interviewee, divorce nullifies the whole sanctity of marriage. It completely eradicates
the people’s values and it makes people vulnerable for the fact that it makes people lax that there will
always be a way out of a marriage, by this; divorce is foreseen as a solution to every marriage problem
there is present. I believe that the sanctity of marriage should be kept, but what about those people
who are in an abusive relationship? Will we let him or her be stuck in a marriage she/he is not happy in?
I strongly believe that marriage makes the world go round. It is the happiness to both couples ( at least
for starters). And it completely sacrifices the single lives of both couples. This single life is more often
than not missed by both of them, that is why there is a presence of a little bit of resentment. I believe
that it has been the case ever since marriage and commitment is invented. Commitment is a big thing
and as cliché as it may possibly sound, commitment is big responsibility. It does entail having a big
responsibility because it makes use of commitment and love with one another.

In my poll that I have posted here in my blogger site, 83 % said yes to divorce while 16 % said no
to divorce. This only says that no matter what race or what religion, it will always be human nature to be
self-greedy, to think about oneself first before others. Divorce, though, is not being greedy, it is being
safe and it is giving you a new chance to live life the way you want to live it. I believe that divorce is a life
yet to be lived by those who need it, not by those who want it. There is always a fine line between needs
and wants, by now you should have known the pros and cons of divorce. What do you think? Do you
think it is a need or a want? Do you think it is morality or pure personal will and greed? I continue to
stand firm on my belief that divorce is a choice not an obligation. It is a form of help not the sole
solution. It is the epitome of freedom in a sense of necessity. Divorce is pro-choice, pro-chances and
pro-change.