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Self-Reflective Assignment I
Self-Reflective Assignment I
Over the course of my life, there have not been many occasions where I have felt the power to influence others or
change decisions and outcomes. I have, mostly, been a reserved person, throughout my schooling and undergrad
life. During my formative years, I really have not felt a pressing urge to have power. I have always been amiable and
easy-going. I would never raise my hand when the school teacher would ask the class for a representative, or a
captain. Upon analysis now, I can attribute this to my low self-image, physically. I have always been overweight, and
coming into the limelight has always been a harrowing ordeal. Though my performance in school was great, in terms
of academics, extra-curriculars like quizzes, etc., I do not remember having any sway in my class. I was never the one
chosen to organize a picnic, for instance. Maybe that is why I am currently not in contact with any of my school
friends.
Upon reading the part about self-handicapping in the book by Pfeffer, I have realized that throughout my school and
undergrad life, I have been doing this unflinchingly. I have thought of power as something not worth having, as I was
doing just fine without it, going about academics, securing good marks, not getting involved in extracurriculars like
fest-organizing etc. I have overlooked my low self-image, shyness, and inability to engage, as shortcomings and
justified my not having power by making myself believe that power and influence are not worth having. Maybe this
belief stemmed from the fact that in school and college, I really did not have to delegate work and responsibility.
This would change radically during my work life.
In my last job as a probationary officer for a major public sector bank, I was thrown into a position where completing
my own work was never enough. It was a brutal environment where I had to supervise clerks who were often of my
father’s age, as well as manage the expectations of my manager and service the customers through the day. Things
would rarely go according to plan in a normal work day at my workplace. The major chunk of work had to be
delegated to the clerks on a daily basis, who were always reluctant and often hostile to any extra work being
delegated by me to them, especially because I was young and a newcomer. This was due to pervasive union politics
which we all are painfully aware of. Me being technically, a superior to them, in designation, hardly mattered to
them. All the clerks were totally cocooned in an alliance and this is where my first tryst with influence and power
begins.
As mentioned by Pfeffer in his book, skill is a non-negotiable condition for building influence and power. Over the
months, I invested my time and energy at being proficient at my own work, so that when any new and unforeseen
contingency would arise, I would become the go-to guy. Also, I made significant effort to socialize with the clerks and
gain their confidence. In a matter of months, I had gained significant influence over them. Also, I consciously aligned
myself with my manager in achieving all the targets that he wanted. Soon enough, our branch was performing at par
with the top branches in our circle. From being a nondescript branch to a top performer. Thankfully my efforts were
recognized and I was made a part of a special task force, which expanded my knowledge. Through all these
experiences, I came to know of the significance of having power and influence. I cannot say that I am fully equipped
with the skills to achieve power though. Maybe I had been lucky. I certainly had a ton of failings. But one thing is
certain: the manager and the clerks keep in touch with me to this day.
I believe that my own self-image is still a hindrance, albeit lesser in impact now, to being more powerful. I constantly
seem to be reminding myself that I deserve better, although I have found myself prone to compromising and getting
a bad deal in some situations.
I’m taking this class to replicate and bolster the success that I had in my previous job. I have seen the benefits of
having power and influence over outcomes. However, as I mentioned before, I am complacent that I may not have
all the skills in order to gain power yet. I’m taking this class not just as another subject. I’m really hoping it gives me
the skills to harness, and the confidence to accept positions of power.