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Family Life: Word of Faith Bible Institute Lagos
Family Life: Word of Faith Bible Institute Lagos
FAMILY LIFE
(FML)
“… male and female created he them. So God blessed them, and God said
unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth …” Gen. 1:28
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REFERENCES
Making Marriage Work Faith Oyedepo
Raising Godly Children Faith Oyedepo
Building A Successful Family Faith Oyedepo
Success in Marriage Faith & David Oyedepo
The Successful Family Creflo A. Dollar & Taffi L. Dollar
How to make Marriage Exciting Charles & Frances Hunter
Marriage Covenant Derek Prince
Marriage and the Family K. C. Price
60 things God said about sex Lester Sumrall
God’s Blue Print for a happy home Lester Sumrall
Building Strong Families and Marriages Bill Joe Daugherty
Holy Wisdom to Build Happy Homes Jack Hayford
Marriage Plus Ray Mosholder
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COURSE OBJECTIVES
By the end of the Course, the students should know:
What marriage and family life are?
God's purpose for instituting marriage
Why it is important to succeed at it.
How marriage affect all the three dimensions of a man/woman.
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TABLE OF CONTENTS
REFERENCES 2
COURSE OBJECTIVES 3
LECTURE ONE
Lesson One Introduction 5
Lesson Two The Institution Of Marriage
6
Lesson Three Purposes Of Marriage 8
Lesson Four The Nature Of Man 11
LECTURE TWO
Lesson Five The Christian Home 14
Lesson Six Principles Of A Successful Home
16
Lesson Seven Enemies Of Family Success
19
Lesson Eight The Power-Base For A Sweet Christian Home 26
LECTURE THREE
Lesson Nine Accepting Marital Responsibilities 27
Lesson Ten Getting Married 32
Lesson Eleven Hope For The Hopeless – Mending The Fence 37
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LECTURE ONE
LESSON ONE
INTRODUCTION
MARRIAGE AND FAMILY
There is a clear difference between marriage and family.
DEFINITIONS OF TERMS
MARRY
“Marry” can be defined as taking as a husband or wife.
To successfully combine something with another.
Putting these two definitions above together with God’s word, Marriage
can be defined as “a successful combination of a man and a woman in a
holy wedlock.”
FAMILY
“Family” is dictionary defined as “a group of people consisting of parents
and children and sometimes close relatives, or a group of related people.
From the above, Marriage is the foundation for the family Psalm 11:3.
No marriage, no families.
A marriage involves only 2 people, but family involves much more people.
Your relationship with your wife will determine the relationship you have
in the future with your family.
The level of stability you enjoy in Ministry will be determined by the depth
of oneness you share with your wife
(Eph.5:31, 32a)
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LESSON TWO
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When you understand and live by the mysteries of God, you command
mastery on the earth.
The mysteries of God in marriage when understood and applied make you
overcome every misery in marriage.
God has not ordained marriage to bring misery, but rather to provide help
towards mastery.
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LESSON THREE
PURPOSES OF MARRIAGE
God is a God of purpose -Eccl. 3:1; Gen. 1:1-end; Gen. 2:1-end; 1Cor. 7:1-5
Purposes of Marriage include:-
1. HELP MEET: Gen. 2:18-21 (amplified version).
A help suitable, adaptable and complementing.
Husband and Wife are meant to be help-meet one to another in All
areas of life - spirit, soul and body (financially, socially, emotionally, etc.).
It is meant to establish help and not hurt; accord, not discord.
2. SPIRITUAL REINFORCEMENT: Joshua 23:10; Deut. 32:30
Prov. 27:17; Eccl. 4:9-10.
“Reinforcement” means “to give, added strength, to fortify, to support”
something.
Spiritual reinforcement adds spiritual strength.
It makes for spiritual prosperity.
Battles are won more easily with two than with one - Deut.32:30.
Two is always a stronger force - Mat. 18:19.
Marriage is not a necessary evil as the world sees it.
Marriage doesn’t make you less spiritual, rather it makes you more
spiritual.
Spiritually, after marriage, you are meant to be stronger and not vice
versa.
3. COMPANIONSHIP/FELLOWSHIP: Gen. 2:18; Eccl. 4:9-10
The composition of man requires constant fellowship.
There is an adage that says “two are better than one”.
Husband and wife are meant to be friends, lovers and companions -
Mal. 2:14.
Trust is required.
Commitment is required before trust can be in place.
How committed you are to God determines how committed you are to
your marriage.
GOD
Commitment
MAN
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GOD
WOMAN MAN
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It must be noted that child bearing is just one of the many reasons
why God instituted marriage.
It does not follow therefore that a marriage without children is a
failure!
6. TO AVOID FORNICATION (PURITY) - I Cor. 7:2; I Cor. 6:9
Man’s physiological need = sex.
It must be done in purity and satisfied within the scriptural context.
Sex in itself is not sinful, but is meant to be exclusively enjoyed by
husband and wife.
LESSON FOUR
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THE NATURE OF MAN
Marriage involves two people going into it in all areas of life.
Man is essentially triune in nature (three-natured being: spirit, soul and body,
1Thess.5:23).
Man is essentially a spirit, has a soul and lives in a body.
God created us in His image and likeness.
It is with the spirit that man relates to God.
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People going into marriage must of necessity get married to people in their
Kingdom (Amos 3:3).
It is not scriptural for a Christian to marry a non-Christian.
Soul / Mind Amos 3:3; Mark 3:24 - 25
Agreement takes place in the mind
Soul and mind are used interchangeably in scripture.
It is not enough for the husband and wife to belong to the same spiritual
kingdom but they should also have the same mind concerning various
issues of life.
The soul / mind is the centre of the will and emotion, likes and dislikes.
Both parties must be in agreement on major issues of life.
Agreement has to be in place for any marriage to work.
Where there is no agreement, there will be discord, and God is not the
author of confusion, and where there is confusion, there is every evil work
(James 3:16).
They must agree especially on the principles of the doctrine of Christ
(Heb.6:1-3).
These principles are:
1. Repentance from dead works (salvation) The
2. Faith - Principles
of the
3. Baptisms (two baptisms: Holy Ghost and Water) Doctrine
4. Laying on of hands of Christ
of what material gifts go across to each other: a wife giving her body to her
spouse only when she wants to get something etc. This is an eye sore to
Christianity.
In conclusion, marriage affects husband and wife spirit, soul and body.
It is therefore the responsibility of both of them to allow a total union in all
these areas of life. The covenant requires that they have a responsibility to
each other as far as this matter is concerned.
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LECTURE TWO
LESSON FIVE
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The acceptance of Christ (being a Christian) will serve as a foundation on
which the home is built.
Accepting Scriptural responsibility.
All who reside there accept their scriptural responsibility. The Christian
father will not provoke his children to wrath, but will nurture them in the
chastening and admonition of the Lord (Ephesians 6:4) The Christian son and
daughter will obey their Parents in the Lord. (Ephesians 6:1-3).
Hospitality
Hospitality is a willingness to share, with discernment, what God has given
us, including our family, home, finances, and food. It is an attitude of
stewardship, where we do not own anything because we are merely the
caretaker for the real owner is God. In relationships, it is honouring the
boundaries of others, and sharing all we have without strings attached.
(Matthew 25:34-43; Luke 10:30-37; Romans 12:13: 16:3-16; 1 Timothy 5:10;
Hebrews 13:1-3; 1 Peter 4:7-11; 3 John 5-8).
“Brotherly love’ is a catalyst that makes hospitality easy (Roman 12:10, 13).
This is what makes you want to reach out to others and give them a helping
hand. It is what makes you to share what you have with others.
Brotherly love can find expression through giving - a cup of water, a meal,
money, a warm smile or a listening ear, whatever is within your reach to give.
Don’t eat all your food alone and drink all your water alone. Remember that
the liberal soul shall be made fat (Proverbs 11:25). Hospitality is not really in
what is given, but in the way it is given. Philemon ensured that he refreshed
the bowels of the saints, therefore he could be called a true brother.
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This was the strength of the first century Church (Acts 2:44-45). As a result
of this display of brotherly love, God’s power was evident in their midst.
Hospitality is the path to God’s presence.
LESSON SIX
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1. Share Your Life With Your Mate
This principle may sound strange on the surface, when it is usually
the real problem in many marriages.
There are several areas where sharing is very important in marriage.
A. Sharing of companionship, to play and worship together.
B. Sharing of common and personal goals. This could involve financial goals,
family goals, spiritual goals, educational goals, hobbies and career.
C. Sharing of burdens and joys. We all need someone to talk with, when
things go wrong and when they go well. We need a loving and supportive ear.
D. Husband and wife should learn to share their physical bodies with one
another. After marriage, the physical body of the husband belongs to the
wife, and that of the wife belongs to the husband. Both husband and wife are
to enjoy satisfaction from each other’s body. They are not expected to refrain
their bodies from each other anymore (1 Corinthians 7:4).
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LESSON SEVEN
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covetousness: for a man’s life consisteth not in the abundance of the things
which he possesseth.
Covetousness is a sin that destroys and destabilizes many families and homes.
It is a devil’s trap always leads to dissatisfaction, anxiety and unholy
comparison. People who are covetous are always anxious. Gahazi in 2 Kings
5:20 suffered the punishment of leprosy when he yielded to anxiety caused by
his lack of contentment.
The cure for covetousness is contentment. The Bible, in 1 Timothy 6:8 says:
And having food and raiment, let us be therewith content and 1 Timothy 6:6-7
also says:.. But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought
nothing into this world, and it is certain we can carry nothing out. I have
never seen a man buried with all his possessions no matter the quality of
possessions he has! Lusting after material things so much that it takes the
place of God in us, is covetousness that must be replaced with contentment.
Anything that takes the place of God is idolatry. Be contented with what you
have. Anything you do not have now, you do not need. Bishop Oyedepo
always says, “Life is phases and men are in sizes,” this is true.
You must learn to live your level per time. As a family, eat, drink, sleep and
wear your size per time. Be assured of the fact that where you are today is the
least place you will ever be. Your path is destined to shine brighter and
brighter every passing day, until you get to God’s ultimate for your life.
(Proverbs 4:18). Just accept the place you are now, with the knowledge that;
Better is the end of a thing than the beginning thereof: and the patient in spirit
than the proud in spirit (Ecclesiastes 7:8). Nobody climbs a ladder from the
top; rather a ladder is climbed rung by rung from the bottom to the top. Your
future is bright, do not despise it like Esau, and eat your tomorrow today.
Later Esau sought for his inheritance with tears, but it was lost eternally
(Hebrews 12:16-17). It was too late for him; may it not too late for you!
Be excited about where you are now, your future is colourful and bright and
you will get there. You don’t have to steal or cheat to have more, just be
contented and accept your present position. Some singles base their choice of
life partner on the abundance of things the man has. They want a man with a
big car, a high paying job, a house etc. Any marriage that is founded on
material possession is on a shaky foundation and will soon fall apart. Don’t
be blinded by material things. My husband and I had to start out at the first
rung of the ladder in marriage and ministry, many times eating beans and garri
for supper, so that we wouldn’t need breakfast the next day. Some other times
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we didn’t know where and when the next meal was coming from! But God has
always been very faithful. We are not at that point anymore.
Remove your heart and affection from being fixed on material things, as this
will cause you to lose out on God’s placement for you. A covetous person,
who is never satisfied with what he or she has per time, will run into dubious
people and do criminal things. Material things come and go. You cannot
afford to tie your life to them.
As a woman, do not compare your husband with you friend’s husband. Do not
compare or nag your spouse for not possessing what your friend or your
friend’s spouse has. Don’t push your spouse to do evil just to please! When
the punishment for that evil comes upon your spouse, you will suffer it too
since you are the one married to him. Covetousness, walk with idolatry and
pride. The ultimate end of this, is destruction. (Proverbs 16:18). God’s Word
in Proverbs 28:16(b) says: but he that hateth covetousness shall prolong his
days. This means that covetousness can rob you of long life!
5. Impatience.
Patience is the opposite of impatience and impatience is inability to deal
calmly with a situation or wait for something. It can also mean a state of
being in an unusual haste. Many families have been ruined because of
impatience in the individuals or family members involved. Isaiah 28:16 says:
he that believeth shall not make haste. Haste makes waste. One example of
impatience is Abraham in Genesis 16:1-6. Abraham, the father of faith, came
to a point in life where he experienced impatience. God had appeared to him
several times, assuming him that he would have a son by his darling wife,
Sarah. Having waited for what appeared to be too long a time, he readily gave
in to Sarah’s suggestion to go into’ her maid and raise an heir through her.
One would have thought that as great as Abraham was, he would be immune
to impatience but it was so natural for him to give in to it. He must have
begun to tire out for waiting, long before Sarah made that suggestion, such
that the moment an opening came he quickly grabbed it and what an irony
that the child born by Abraham out of impatience became an enemy of the
child of faith. Ishmael and Isaac could not live together.
Many have killed the joy of their would be miracle because of their
impatience with the Word of God. God’s ways are higher than our ways, and
His thoughts than ours. Even when He appears to be delaying, you must never
lose hope, because He makes all things beautiful in His time (2 Peter 3:9).
Don’t let the enemy cheat you out of your blessings. God is never slow or
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late. He is always on time with whatever He promises an individual. God’s
time is the right time!
The cure for impatience is simple patience backed by faith in the word of
God. James 1:4 says: but let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be
perfect and entire, wanting nothing. Perfection will only come, when your
patience is in place. Your patience must be backed by a strong faith in God
and His Word. If you are experiencing turbulence in your home, for instance,
you must discover what God’s Word says is the solution, and then step out in
obedience. It may not look like the solution, but God is a marriage expert; He
instituted the union and knows how best to make it work.
When you are filled with the Word concerning your home, it will not run short
of miracles. To keep enjoying God’s blessings for your family, you must
keep doing whatever He tells you to do. Not just doing it, but doing it fully,
going to the extremes in your obedience. God has not changed, and He will
not compromise His standard.
When His Word is not given its priority place in your family, there is bound to
be problems. Satan is rendered powerless when a couple stands firmly on the
Word of God and operates by its principles. Hold on to God and His Word
patiently. Many give up when they are just a minute to their breakthrough;
don’t give up! Trust God completely. God’s Word in Hebrews 10:36 says:
For ye have need of patience, that after ye have done the will of God, ye
might receive the promise. Patience is a must! Instead of looking at the
problem, challenge or situation; look into God’s word, confess it to yourself
and remind Him in prayers. If for instance you are looking for a baby; instead
of mourning over doctor’s reports and getting unhappy about every monthly
menstrual circle that comes, you can hold on to God’s Word; it never fails.
To overcome the darkness of barrenness, go for the light of God’s Word and
keep declaring that Word until that barren situation changes. Light will
always shine in darkness and darkness can never comprehend light (John 1:5).
A woman gave this testimony and in her own words, she said: “I have been
married for 7 years. Shortly after my wedding, my period seized. Thinking I
was pregnant, I kept expecting my baby. But it turned out to be a false alarm.
From the results of an ultrasound scan I did, the doctor said I had a small
uterus, too small to accommodate a baby. I laughed if off, reasoning that if
God has give those without wombs children, I who even has one, has hope. I
got up for prayers, when my case was described by the Bishop’s wife, at one
of the conventions held, and after prayers were made, my period was restored
and a month later, I became pregnant! My baby was born and his name is
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David! All glory to God” I declare that by the power backing the Word I bring
to you right now, that situation of barrenness is consumed and you are
liberated, in Jesus name. Your testimony shall be the next in Jesus’ name!
You are free!
LESSON EIGHT
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THE POWER-BASE FOR A SWEET CHRISTIAN HOME
1. PRAYER: Prayer is a very vital tool in the home. (As a married man or
woman, you have a higher level of unity with your spouse than any two
friends can ever have).
Your union is recognized and sanctioned by God, so when you offer prayers
to God on any issue at all, He honours your request.(Matthew 18:19).
But if they do not agree, their prayers are hindered (1 Peter 3:7).
One of the reasons the enemy puts disagreement between couples is so that he
can rob them of this prayer advantage (Ecclesiastes 4:12). God, your spouse
and you form a three-fold cord that is not quickly broken.
Prayer can bring that change you have long awaited in your home.
Your prayers can bring changes to the lives of your spouse and children (1
Corinthians 7:14).
2. WORD STUDY: You obtain power through Word study.
Locate what the Word of God says concerning any issue of your life and
home. God has made available His Word to you, but you must be able to sit
down and locate your place in it (Revelation 5:4).
Until the book is opened, weeping continues. God is not moved by your tears,
He is moved by His Word. You can neither use your tear to harass God, nor
bribe Him by weeping.
You only gain access to His blessings by the understanding and application of
His Word.
Saturate your spirit-man with the Word of God. (2 Timothy 2:15).
The only way to avoid shame is to study. If you don’t want reproach to
continually hang around you, study. God says the only way out of shame is to
study and apply yourself to the Word of truth. Are you having problems in
any area of life? Sit down with your Bible and anointed books.
In the natural, if you fix your eyes on a particular object consistently for a
long time, the object tends to look bigger in your eyes. The more you look at
the object, the bigger it seems. It’s the same with the Word of God. As you
keep your focus on the Word, it is magnified more than your physical
problems, and eventually, it swallows up these problems one by one until you
see them no more. So, as you focus on the Word, keep meditating on what
you have seen, apply it to your situation and circumstances, and let those
words form a pattern for your living.
LECTURE THREE
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LESSON NINE
(C) As a Leader
Provide for your household – 1.Tim. 5:8.
Be the head and spiritual leader of your wife - Eph. 5:23.
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Take the lead in decisions, etc.
Please note that it is not enough to rejoice at the great authority God has
vested on you. You must also live up to the responsibilities attached to it.
THE WOMAN
She is expected to fulfill her roles as a wife to her husband, mother to her
children and a home maker.
(A) As a wife
Submission is primary.
“Submission” means “willingly allowing oneself to be ruled by another”.
It incorporates respect.
Wife must submit in all things and in reverence of her husband.Eph. 5:22-
24, 33; Col. 3:18; Titus 2:5.
She must be chaste (decent) in Word and deed - I Pet. 3:2
“Mind what you say about your home”.
Must love her husband - Titus 2:4; Prov. 31:26; 14:1
Must see prayer as a necessary weapon rather than arguments.
(B) As a Mother - Prov. 22:6
Prov. 22:6 is the basis for training children. “Train” means to “instruct by
example”.
Often the faults of a child reflect those of parents.
Therefore be a stimulator not a reactor.
Treat them as little people, not as inferiors.
Love and control are two instruments required for training.
Satisfy the child’s, spiritual, emotional and physical needs Deut. 6:6-7;
2Tim. 3:15.
(C) As a Home Maker
She must see to the general welfare of the members of the family (Spirit,
Soul and Body).
Keeps the Home - Titus 2:5; Prov. 31:27.
Prepares food for the household - Prov. 31:15.
Be Hospitable - Heb. 13:1-2.
Must make the home atmosphere conducive for the Holy Spirit.
Your home is what you make it to be.
1. LOVE:
God is love. The love walk must begin at home. Love ministers to another
person’s need without thought of personal gain. God ministers His love to
us through His Word, so should we - Eph. 5:1-2.
2. CONTROL
Your Children should not control you. You cannot train a child whom you
cannot control.
The instrument of love, divinely given is the rod - Prov. 13:24
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Chasten as often as necessary.
Never use your hand to spank your child.
Never bruise/break a child’s skin.
Never hit a child on the head - Prov. 23:13-14.
A child who knows his parents love him and has been trained to obey their
authority will find it easy to allow a loving God control his life.
The rod should be used to correct wrong:
- Words - “… the Word of God” -Rev. 19:13
- Thoughts - “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you,” - Jer.
29:11
- Deeds- “He that hath no rule over his own spirit is like a city that is
broken down, and without walls” Prov. 25:28
LESSON TEN
GETTING MARRIED
HOW TO FIND A MARRIAGE PARTNER Prov. 18:22
Basic Searching Tools
1. Desire A Partner: Prov. 10:24
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Your desire for a partner is not carnal.
Don’t pretend not to need a partner; because marriage is honorable - Heb.
13:4.
2. Make Yourself Fit: Matthew 7:3-5
Make yourself fit to be found.
Don’t just look for the “right” person, be a “right” person yourself.
“Birds of the same feather only flocks together”
“Water seeks its own level”
No “right” person will want to marry a “wrong” person.
Get yourself busy in Kingdom Service - Mat. 6:33.
3. Ask God in Prayer: Prov. 18:22
Ask God in prayer for a marriage partner - Ps. 37:5.
Commit it to God in prayer.
Do it without reservation, but with an open heart - not with a heart that is
already made up.
Seek in prayer and you will find - Mat. 7:7-8; Luke 11:9-10.
Ask God in faith and confidence - James 1:6-8; I Jn. 5:14.
Give thanks- I Thes. 5:16-18.
4. Apply the Deep Sleep Concept: Genesis 2:18-24; Phil. 4:6; Exodus 14:14.
The concept of deep sleep connotes:
“No anxiety”
“No worry”
“Absolute Rest (Holding your peace) - Phil. 4:6; Ex. 14:14.
God put Adam to a deep sleep while He formed the woman.
The miracle will take place (will be manifested) as you take your rest.
It was one of his ribs (from his side) that God took, not feet Lesson?
Your wife is meant to be by your side, not to be trodden under your feet.
The rib was not from the head, so the wife is not to head the union in
marriage, but the husband.
5. Open Your Eyes:
Spiritual Eyes and Physical Eyes
You have both Spiritual and Physical Eyes.
Spiritual Eyes
It is with your spiritual eyes that you relate with God.
Be vigilant, alert, and sensitive spiritually to God.
Open up your spiritual eyes to “hear” or perceive what God has to say
to you on the subject of marriage.
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Physical Eyes:
It is with your physical eyes you make contact on earth.
Locate with your physical eyes someone who you can appreciate and
love.
Both your spiritual and physical eyes must work together.
When your spiritual eyes receive a signal from God, there will
be a knowing, the moment the physical eyes come in contact with
such a person - Romans 8:16
6. Make Your Intention Known:
At the right time take practical steps to make your intention known to
the person you have located - Eccl. 3:1.
Be practical, simple, straight to the point and sincere in your approach
and discussion.
Respect the opinion and decision of the individual involved.
Note:
Bear in mind the prerequisites for choosing, e.g. must be born again
II Cor. 6:14; Amos 3:3, agreeable, etc.
After locating a partner for marriage and both of you have agreed to marry
each other at a later date, you enter into a period called courtship.
1. COURTSHIP
What Is Courtship?
The period between when 2(two) people agree to marry and when they are
actually joined together in wedlock is called courtship.
Courtship period is like foundation laying period - Psa.11:3.
The Foundation laid during courtship will determine what your home
(marriage and family life) will look like.
It should be a period of getting to know each other better.
Attend fellowships together, share the Word together, pray together, etc.
Introduce each other to parents, friends, relations, etc. at least informally.
Discuss any peculiarities about each other.
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However ensure you know each other well enough to be able to spend the rest
of your lives together before you say “yes, I do”.
Wisdom will help you direct your affairs - Eccl. 10:10.
CAUTION!!!
In case you discover during courtship that both of you don’t go together
and cannot spend the rest of your life as husband and wife, wisdom demands
you call it off - Prov. 4:7.
A broken courtship is not equal to divorce.
2. ENGAGEMENT
Having obtained parental consent, an engagement ceremony follows.
Engagement is a formal or public introduction of each other to parents,
relations and friends - Ruth 4:1-12.
Engagement or traditional wedding does not replace church wedding, but it is
necessary in order to fulfill all righteousness - Mat. 3:15.
Engagement is a time of payment of dowry - Genesis 24:1-end
Note however that only things which are ‘precious’ and ‘glorifying’ to God
should be given. Uphold your Christian testimony.
- Gen. 24:53; Matt. 5:16.
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The starting point of a relationship between a Christian man and woman is
an understanding that their coming together is not by chance but by the
supernatural hand of God - Rom. 28:30.
A strong love for one another must exist, and be on the build up. SOS8:6,
7.
They both must be matured spiritually, emotionally stable and physically
mature to parent children.
God, places an emphasis on ‘man’ not ‘boy’ in Gen. 2:24; Eph. 5:3.
Making a success of marriage requires physical stamina, objective
reasoning, ability to be considerate, etc.
One that is mature for marriage should be able to assume responsibility for
his/her actions, look after the welfare of his/her mate and children.
Both must propose and agree on children to have, and whether brothers and
sisters from their families can live with them and from what period after the
wedding.
Marriage is “honorable in all” only if the bed is undefiled. Heb.13:4;
Gal.5:19-21.
There is no room for sexual intercourse or anything that leads to it. Keep
the marriage bed undefiled.
Abstain from all appearances of evil - 1Thess. 5:22.
Many couples who fell did so as they engaged in heavy petting that got out
of control. “One thing led to another”.
This is like the child who stood at the edge of a forest fire and said, “but I
only lit a match”.
LESSON ELEVEN
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wedding. Perhaps you just ran away together and have been living together
ever since, whatever your case may be, all hope is not lost. Go and pay the
dowry you ought to have paid. Wisdom demands that you block all covenant
leakages. Haven’t you heard of instances where the man died and the woman
who had lived with him all those years is kicked out by her in-laws? They
strip her naked and send her away empty-handed with her children, because
there is nothing to show that he married her legally. Suddenly, she has no
voice. Don’t be caught in folly, go and block all the covenant leakages.
I will never forget a young woman who came for counseling with Mama. She
was having a terrible time in the home and was set to call it quits. To worsen
the matter, she was barren. As they talked, it was discovered that they were
just living as man and wife without anything legally binding them together.
She was counseled to encourage her man to go and pay her dowry and then to
seek out a certified minister of the Gospel to bless their union.
Thank God for obedient Christians! After a while, she came back to testify
that they had done all that was said and peace had returned to their home. In
addition, she was also pregnant! If God could heal her home, He will do the
same for you as you obey these Biblical injunctions. You will surely succeed!
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