Professional Documents
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Fiction Beduini Scenes
Fiction Beduini Scenes
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Date: Sat, 3 Nov 2001 10:51:16 -0800
Subject: Story Submission - Scenes
Source: direct
Scenes by beduini
Category: MSR
Rating: NC-17
They sat side by side on his leather sofa, leaning forward over a
dozen eight by ten color photographs spread out on the coffee table
before them. Color photographs in graphic detail, of various
bloodied body parts that had once belonged to several young,
attractive and alive young women.
It was past midnight, and they had been over every photo in detail
eleven times but were no farther along than they'd been when they'd
started.
She turned her scrutinizing blue eyes from the photos to look at
him. His face was lined with fatigue and frustration as he worried
his lower lip between his teeth, shaking his head.
Closing her eyes, she rolled her head from shoulder to shoulder,
her stiff neck giving away it's secret with several soft pops.
"Maybe we'd see it if we took a break from it." Her voice was low
and rough from overtiredness.
He ducked his head and let out a breath of air. When he raised it
again he gazed purposefully at her, his eyes red and weary. They
told her that he wouldn't stop, couldn't stop, even for a few hours.
Her eyes were full of empathy and concern for him. "When was the
last time you slept, Mulder?"
He dug his palms into his eye sockets, feeling the grit. "I got a
few hours early this morning."
Letting out a long breath, she kept her eyes on his face. He was
not one to cut immediately to the larger issue. "And the night
before?"
Dropping his hands down limply between his knees, he blinked at the
photographs. They were still the same images as the last eleven
times. The same frozen, late-January landscape, the same
dismembered remains.
She closed her eyes, exhaled and dropped her chin down to her chest.
He was so stubborn. It was something that inspired both admiration
and frustration in her. But his passion for getting to the heart of
a matter was something that never failed to hold her in awe. He
would forego any physiological need, any obstacle in his path, just
to gain the knowledge he sought.
An honorable man.
She studied his profile for a long moment, then reached out, gently
clasping his chin between her thumb and forefinger. Turning his
face toward her, she looked into his eyes. His countenance was both
tired and determined, but when his eyes met hers his expression
crumpled slightly. She saw his desperation to solve the puzzle, to
prevent the killer from taking one more victim.
She was not one to make uneconomical tactile gestures - the Scully
family had always relied more on expressions and subtext than overt
physical demonstrations. Early on in their partnership she and
Mulder had silently established the guidelines that they would work
within. They were partners, and they became friends.
However, more and more often she'd found herself bending those lines
a little, along with Mulder, as the lines between their working
relationship and their personal relationship slowly shifted. Like
now...they were working, but with no more than a look and a few
words he could quickly fill her to capacity with love and fierce
protectiveness. Without hesitation, she laid her hand against his
cheek, her thumb gently running over his cheekbone.
Mulder sighed, closed his eyes briefly then looked back at her,
silently thanking her for her understanding. It was such a tender
look. A vulnerable look. Something within her encouraged her to
bend the lines a little farther and she leaned in, brushing her lips
against his softly in reply.
His eyes raised up toward hers briefly, then closed, his entire body
holding still. He pressed back against her lips, relaxed a moment,
turned his head slightly and pressed against them again, encouraging
her to continue, to not pull away.
She did not pull away. She returned his gentle kiss with another.
His hand came up to cup the back of her head gently, the pads of his
fingers flexing against the soft silk of her hair. It was soft and
sweet, neither deepening their kisses beyond the easy touching of
lips. Their movements were small, sliding tenderly against one
another.
She cradled his face between her palms as if she were holding the
most priceless of possessions, and when she finally pulled back, she
looked up at him with wide, loving eyes. Then she let out a long,
slow breath and closed her eyes as she leaned back into the sofa,
letting her fingers slide softly down the side of his face.
Along with his acceptance of the situation and the warmth and the
pleasure of her touch he felt himself relaxing, falling into a hazy
fugue. He realized grudgingly that he was beyond exhaustion, and
Scully probably knew that he would give in with the right kind of
encouragement. Her hands were already gently guiding his cheek to
rest against her shoulder and his legs folded up reflexively at the
end of the sofa as she softly raked her fingers through his hair.
"Get some rest, Mulder. We'll work some more in a little while.
The photos and I aren't going anywhere," she said quietly as his
eyes blinked open.
She looked down into his eyes with a slight smile. "No."
He closed his eyes and smiled, feeling ridiculously warm and content
for a man with a heinous crime to solve. "You weren't expecting me
to transform into a prince, were you?"
She wasn't going to tell him that she already thought of him as a
modern-day prince. A frustrating, noble, flawed, charming, real-
life prince with a nose that was too large and yet perfect for his
beautiful face and a long, hard physique that showcased his
impeccable taste in clothes, although he appeared to never give it a
second thought. But she did. Yes, his ego would certainly run away
with that admission. Instead, she replied as seriously as she
could. "No. A pumpkin, maybe."
He was silent for a while, and she thought perhaps he was drifting
off to sleep, when he opened his eyes again. "You may have to
kiss me awake if I happen to fall asleep."
She raised an eyebrow. "I'll keep that in mind." Not that she
would mind in the least. She leaned down until her face was just
inches above his, staring into his eyes, and spoke with a tone that
brooked no argument. "Close your eyes."
He shut his eyes again, burrowing his face into her neck as he
curled a large hand around her waist. "Just for a few minutes, and
then we'll go over the photos again, 'K?" he mumbled, his breath
warm against her neck while his body grew heavier. It wasn't an
uncomfortable heaviness, and she found that she was quite content.
Her movements slowed, and laying her head back against the back of
the sofa, she closed her eyes.
xox
Near to the bottom he caught sight of her, a flash of auburn and tan
rounding the next corner.
"Scully!"
When he made the turn he stopped short, her small hand bracing
against his chest just before he was about to slam into her. She
stood facing him on the landing just above the door to the lowest
level, a leather case hanging by a strap slung over her shoulder and
her face turned up toward his in curious anticipation. Her eyes
glittered as they met his...she was as happy to see him as he was to
see her.
"Mulder?" she asked with worry, her voice muffled as her face was
pressed partially into his chest.
His impulsive kiss was more demanding than any of the previous
kisses he'd ever shared with her. Hotter than the two-second, open-
mouthed 'happy birthday' kiss he'd planted on her when he bid her a
good night and left her nearly boneless at the door to her motel
room in Los Angeles three weeks ago. Now he moved his lips
passionately over hers and her hands rose up his back to slip into
his hair, pressing him closer.
This was the way she'd always hoped Mulder would kiss her - with the
same passion and determination that she saw him pour into his work
every day. She parted her lips and his tongue brushed against hers
tentatively, both of them whimpering at the brief taste. They tried
it again, then again, then the lack of oxygen combined with the
shock and the sudden realization of their actions broke the kiss.
He buried his face in the place between her neck and shoulder,
breathing heavily, temporarily drunk on sudden immersion in the
taste and the feel and the scent of her.
"Four days, Scully." He said softly. His arms tightened around her
and she pressed her face into the middle of his chest, wrapping her
arms around his waist.
"Almost five. I thought you'd already left for the night," she
said, her velvety voice nearly an octave higher than usual as she
breathed in his warm, comforting smell.
"I was downstairs looking for you," she answered. Her small frame
began to shake with silent laughter at the irony.
He joined her laughter, resting his chin on top of her head after
she turned it to the side so that she could breathe easier.
She lifted her head from his chest and looked into his happy, warm,
drowsy eyes. He spoke of work matters but the subtext was much more
personal. Something huge had just happened in their relationship.
Her eyes were wide and shining as she blinked up at him. "Does it
have anything to do with that piece of paper you're holding in your
hand?"
They stared at each other, still breathing hard from the first kiss,
and he leaned down, intending to kiss her again. But the sound of a
door opening as someone entered the stairwell several floors above
them caused them to break their embrace and take a half step back.
They looked at each other, remembering who they were and where they
were, and Mulder motioned to the garage door, both of them
descending from the landing and out of the stairwell.
He walked her to her car, his arm slung around her shoulders.
"Wish your Mother a happy birthday for me," he said as she turned
to face him, taking her hand and lacing his fingers between hers.
She nodded, then sighed. "I didn't get as far as I'd hoped today so
I'll most likely be in the lab all day tomorrow as well."
He nodded, biting the corner of his lip. "Well..." The air between
them was still charged. He looked down at their hands, letting hers
go. "I suppose you're already late for the dinner."
She gave him a tight-lipped smile of regret. "'fraid so."
He beamed with relief. He had been half expecting her to turn him
down. "Anywhere. Where would you like to go? Dinner? Theater?
Mud wrestling?" She let out a snort, and he laughed along with her.
"Whatever you feel like, Scully." He let go of her hand and ran a
finger under the lapel of her camel coat. "I just want to spend
some time with you."
He could see her mind working as he watched her face, turning over
the request and looking for the best response. She was still
dwelling on the fact that he, Mulder, had slipped her the tongue.
Had moved right into the sexual arena without warning, and her pulse
was still racing in the aftermath. She drew in a long breath to
slow it down, stood straighter and turned her face up so that she
was looking at him through half-closed eyelids.
Scully's face grew solemn as her mind considered the levity of their
actions. Mulder studied her face, his own expression turning
serious. He knew Dana Scully pretty well, and he knew that she had
experienced moments of 'leaping before looking' in the past, moments
that had some serious, lasting effects on her. He knew how
important their partnership and their relationship were to her.
"Look, Scully, I'm not suggesting that we..."
She closed her eyes briefly, drawing in a deep breath. "I know,
Mulder."
He saw her face soften and her cheeks grow pink as she glanced down,
and he thought that she looked so incredibly beautiful at that
moment. This time, it was she who reached out and took his hand,
tugging on it gently before looking up at him.
"We both could stand to get out into the world and try to have fun
for a few hours."
A slow smile crept across his face and he nodded. They were still
on the same page, and he had waited a long time to get there. He
was determined to make it work. "Then there's only one condition,"
he said, playing with her fingers. She raised her eyebrow in
question, and he smiled. "No suits, alright? Strictly non-working
attire." She narrowed her eyes at him suspiciously. She was
probably expecting baseball, he mused. It was too cold in March for
baseball. "Trust me, okay?"
She smiled, her eyes warm and glowing. "Always." They looked at
each other a moment longer, then she took a breath, opening her
mouth to speak.
She nodded, then turned to unlock her car door. She gave him a look
of affection before climbing inside, and he stood by as she pulled
out of her parking space, offering a brief wave as she drove past.
xox
"I can't believe you never told me this." He blinked at her dark
profile, silhouetted against the dim light filtering in through the
tempered glass of the passenger window. "How long have you felt
this way?" He felt as if his own stomach had taken up residence
somewhere around his feet.
She looked at him a long moment, her light eyes barely visible as
her chest rose and fell with several breaths. "A while," she said,
finally.
She looked down at her hands laying in her lap, swallowing. "No.
I'm still cancer-free."
Laying his head back against the seat's headrest, he closed his eyes
and let out a breath of relief. It did little to resolve the
building tension surrounding them, however. They were both silent,
Mulder staring out the windshield through slit eyes, and Scully
staring down into her lap, her chin against her chest.
He killed the engine and dropped his hand back to his lap abruptly.
She moved her hand away and he turned in his seat to face her, his
eyes dark and his expression a mixture of hurt and confusion.
"Obviously you don't feel the same way," she said flatly, pursing
her lips and looking away.
"No Scully, I don't feel the same way. I HAVE hope for the future."
His words were clipped, spoken with the same tone he used when
presenting a case.
He gave her a look that told her how ridiculous he thought her
analogy was. "First you compare me to Ahab in Moby Dick, then I'm a
pumpkin, and now I'm Charlie Brown. Nice to know you think about me
in such a flattering way, Scully."
She stared at him, nonplussed. "You ARE like Charlie Brown, Mulder.
Only instead of a football it's the truth. And instead of Lucy
pulling the ball out from under you it's Cancerman, or the Justice
Department, or an ultimatum you won't be able to refuse..." she
paused, her voice becoming softer. "Don't you ever get tired of
having that ball pulled out from under you?"
He nodded. "Yes, I do. But there are things I still want to do, to
find..." he paused again, biting the corner of his lip as he looked
at her. "I had hoped that you would be a part of that. But now you
tell me that you don't have any hope for the future and I wonder
why the Hell you bother to show up to work every day if that's how
you feel." There was a hint of anger in his voice by the time he
was finished.
She took a deep breath and held it, then let it out slowly, and he
looked, unseeing, out his side window. She didn't look at him when
she spoke, her voice low. "I didn't say I don't have hope, Mulder.
I said I don't have any expectations regarding the future."
"It still translates the same," he replied, looking back out the
window.
She shifted in her seat, turning so that she was facing him.
"Mulder, I'm sure I don't have to remind you of all of the things
that we've seen and done in the last seven years," she spoke slowly
and carefully, her vulnerability on the subject evident as he turned
his head to look at her. "All of the things...all of the people
that we've lost. All of the times that we've nearly lost our
own lives." She looked at him and he looked away, averting his
eyes, and her voice developed a harder edge. "Every day I thank God
that we're still here, that we've both made it this far. Every day
I know that one day, perhaps today, or tomorrow, or next week...one
of us might not be as lucky." She looked back down at her hands,
swallowing and taking a deep, shaky breath. "I can't afford to have
any expectations, Mulder."
She held his gaze, looking at him for a long time, her eyes large
and black in the darkness. He understood that his was not a valid
question, that it was ridiculous that he would even ask such a thing
at this late point in their partnership, after all that they had
seen and shared. 'Who else in the world could I trust to look after
you,' her eyes asked as they stared into his, although she didn't
give voice to that thought. Finally, she responded with conviction,
"I am where I want to be."
He blinked at her and she slid across the seat, closer to him. She
looked down a moment, gathering her thoughts. "Mulder, some time
ago I realized that I was never going to have the kind of life that
people traditionally expect to have when they get to be our age. I
can't sit back in a routine forty-hour-a-week job, blissfully
ignorant to the things going on in the world around me just to
collect a paycheck to pay the mortgage." She looked up at him.
"Climbing into the SUV after an eight-hour day to fight all of the
other under-challenged and over-stressed people my age also on their
way home for a parking spot at the organic food store." A smile
began playing at the corners of his mouth at the image she created
and she took his hand, her eyes shining. "I don't expect anything
else than what I've already got from the life I have now, Mulder. I
have hopes, yes, but no expectations."
He looked at her with raised eyebrows. "I thought you wanted all of
that. A normal life."
She let out a soft snort. "I used to think I did. Maybe I did want
it at one point in my life. But I consider everything that I know
now and everything I'd have to give up in order to have that and I'm
not willing to give anything up. I've made my decision, whatever
may happen."
He looked down at her hand on top of his in his lap and wove his
fingers through hers. She gave his hand a gentle squeeze and he met
her gaze, his eyes warm and glowing as he smiled a quiet, closed-
lipped smile. The words she spoke were something he never would ask
from her, no matter how much he wanted and needed to have her with
him. It had so often been implied, and he had wanted it so much
that sometimes he believed that the commitment on her part had been
made.
But she was making that commitment now...to stay with him and the X
Files indefinitely. And it wasn't just about the job, he
understood, it was about everything...their work, their quests,
their partnership, their friendship and whatever else it was that
they were becoming as well. They had crossed a line, gone beyond
the boundaries of what they had once been. She was committing to
all of it, assuring him that she was invested for the duration.
It gave him hope for the future as much as it broke his heart to
hear that she'd abandoned her own expectations for the benefit of
the greater good. He was certain that the two of them together were
the greater good, although they were not normal in the traditional
sense. But perhaps they could carve out a little place just for
themselves. Take what they'd shared and learned and build on it,
turn it into something that was uniquely theirs.
"If you have no expectations, then tell me what you hope for,
Scully," he said tenderly, still holding her hand.
She raised her head, drew in a deep breath and released it. Her
eyes flashed and her voice was firm, full of conviction. "I think
you know. To see justice served to those responsible for my
sister's death, and for my abduction and my cancer." She paused a
moment. "And for Emily." Mulder drew in a sharp breath, and she
looked at him, her gaze becoming softer, more tender. She held his
eyes for a moment, then looked back down.
Her smile grew broader. "It's the only kind of answer you're going
to get right now."
She looked down a moment, then back up at him. "I think I'd like to
go home. The dinner was excellent, as was the company, but it's
been a long week."
The restaurant wasn't far from Scully's apartment, and they passed
the ride over in a comfortable silence. Mulder pulled into a space
near the front of her building and looked over at her, his hand
poised near the keys hanging in the ignition.
"I don't think it's a good idea for you to come in tonight," Scully
said softly without looking at him.
She nodded, taking a deep breath of cold night air and rocking back
on her heels as she shoved her hands into the pockets of her wool
overcoat. "Thanks for dinner, Mulder."
She looked up into his eyes, and he looked back at her, his eyes
darting between her eyes and her lips. She glanced at his mouth,
then back into his eyes. Reaching out, he tucked a strand of hair
behind her ear. "I...I want you know how much it means to me. What
you said earlier about being where you want to be."
She closed her eyes a moment, then looked down at her feet. "I
know, Mulder."
He looked down, taking a deep breath. "I know you don't have any
expectations, which is probably the most logical way to approach
this considering..." he stopped, looking into her eyes as she raised
her face to look into his. "I just...I want you to know that I
haven't ruled out the other option, either. Maybe not the boring
job and the organic food store part, but the rest of it..." he
shrugged, looking away. "Who knows? Maybe someday..."
When he looked back at her she was watching him with wide-eyed
bewilderment, her breathing quick and shallow. She let out of huff
and smiled, tears forming in her eyes. "We'll see what happens."
She sniffed back the threatening tears and pulled a hand out of her
pocket, wrapping it tightly around his wrist. "No expectations."
Their eyes met and they both smiled, understanding each other
implicitly. He cradled her face in his hands and slowly leaned
forward as she leaned toward him, their lips pressing together
softly. They shared several soft kisses before she placed her hands
on his shoulders and he turned his head to the side, opening his
mouth and tracing her lips lightly with the tip of his tongue.
She pulled back and let her arms drop to her sides. "Goodnight,
Mulder," she replied after a long moment and several more quick
breaths.
He took a step back and she straightened her shoulders, turning and
walking toward the door of her apartment building. After a few
steps she stopped and turned back to look at him. "That was one,"
she said with an enigmatic smile.
He shook his head. "One what?" he asked with a smile that mirrored
hers.
"One of the things I'd hoped for," she replied, ran her eyes over
him flirtatiously, then turned and walked away.
He fell back against the car, as if his legs were no longer able to
support his weight. "Anything else I should know about?" he called
out to her, and she stopped, turning halfway to face him once again.
Mulder stepped around the car and climbed inside. But instead of
driving away, he killed the engine and sat in the car, unable to
stop himself from grinning from ear to ear at the steering wheel. A
light appearing above him caught his attention, and he turned toward
the lighted window, catching sight of her looking out at him. Three
seconds later his cellphone trilled.
"Tell me you changed your mind and you want me to come inside," he
said in lieu of a greeting.
"Yeah?"
"I don't know..." she said, settling herself into the wooden rocking
chair she'd pulled over to the window and tucking a foot underneath
her. "How about a medium-sized dog, like a Border Collie or a
Spaniel, or maybe a small German Shepherd?"
He was silent for a few moments. "Is that another one, Scully?"
"Yes what?"
"Snoopy?"
"Mulderrrr."
He smiled, seeing her in his mind, rolling her eyes impatiently like
she always did when he teased her. "The answer is yes, Scully."
She didn't reply, but he knew she was smiling just the same. He
reached over and turned the keys in the ignition, pumping the gas
pedal a few times for effect as the engine gunned to life.
"Goodnight, Scully."
xox
She turned the phrase over again and again, using it to keep time
with each contact her body made with the unforgiving pavement.
Breathing the words in and out in cadence.
Her mother didn't know she would take it to heart though, or that
her daughter would be pounding the asphalt in her cross-trainers
with the rhythm of the syllables bouncing around inside of her head.
They had been talking about Easter, although it was still weeks
away, and Dana had discreetly chided her mother for consistently
taking on too many church and social obligations during Easter week.
Her mother had responded with the phrase, and it had stuck.
They were in a relationship that they had reached via back alleys
and side roads. It was a direct result from the years of trust and
intimacy they'd developed through working closely together, evolving
from friendship into something more. They shared deep feelings for
one another and a history that no one else could even begin to
understand. But they didn't ever intend for it to become more than
a working relationship. They didn't nurture and feed it. In fact,
they spent a lot of energy avoiding it. It bloomed, anyway - a side
benefit of what they already were. A flower growing up through the
dark cracks in the asphalt.
Did she expect that it could continue along in the same way it had
developed, untended and pushed aside? Did he? Relationships were
hard work. The number of Venus and Mars books, articles on
communication and intimacy workshops available these days were a
testament to that fact. It had been a long time since she'd been in
a relationship with a man, but she remembered the effort that had
gone into it. There had to be a lot of communication to avoid
misinterpretations and hurt feelings.
She and Mulder had put a lot of work into their partnership, but
much of their communication was done cryptically via subtext, and
even then they avoided any talk of feelings whenever possible.
Still, they'd managed to convey the extent of their commitment. Did
they really think that they could just add physical intimacy to the
equation without an adjustment in the way they communicated with
each other?
The next day, other than a spark and a flash in their eyes when they
said 'good morning', there was no indication that anything out of
the everyday ordinariness had transpired. It was comforting to know
that they could still get down to business as usual. And that was
how it had been ever since.
Business as usual.
She enjoyed the tease. It had been her secret pleasure for years.
It was both cerebral and titillating, just bordering on the edge of
the possibility. She was comfortable within that context, able to
control her responses yet challenged by his. Not that she didn't
enjoy the physiological responses brought on by the more overt
actions like kissing and touching - but those were more difficult
for her to control. That was a different matter altogether, and the
lack of control was something she didn't allow often. In fact, the
last time she'd given away her control there had been grave
consequences and she'd vowed never to act so irrationally again.
But Mulder...she could see herself letting go with him. She'd done
it many times in their professional relationship, and she trusted
him. In fact, she had grown into the idea that he was the only
person she could see herself with. He was bigger and stronger but
he would never hurt her, although sexually in the heat of passion
she suspected he might take her right up to the edge if she were
willing. She could be free to act as she wanted, and yet with just
one word, back in control.
She knew this, but in the past she'd never really allowed herself to
think about it directly in such detail. Up until a week ago, the
idea had always been an abstract one. A mere potentiality. Present
but not seriously considered. But now...sex with Mulder.
Actual sex.
With Mulder.
Not the idea or the fantasy, not the desire. The reality. The
reality of the situation was; a commitment was exchanged and the
intention had been laid out...she and Mulder had begun a physically
intimate relationship and they were going to make love. Have sex.
Fuck. No, not that. Okay, truthfully - yes, that, too. All of the
above. Soon.
She realized that she'd been running with an enormous grin on her
face and she stopped, bending at the waist and sucking in air as her
body compensated for the break in rhythm. Her face felt hot and she
was sure it was an obvious shade of red. Looking up, she noticed
that she was only a few yards away from the bench where she'd met
with Mulder years ago after they'd been separated and reassigned to
different areas within the Bureau. She slowly made her way over to
the bench, grateful that there were few people milling around for a
Saturday, probably due to the early hour.
She stretched a little, using the bench, then sat, looking out over
the Tidal Basin. She wasn't far from work, she could stop by there
even if it was out of her way. Mulder was probably already there,
doing God knows what he does at all hours of the day and night.
Scaring up another field trip, maybe, or cross-referencing the
files.
God, sex.
How long had it been? How long will they draw it out before they
actually do it? Maybe she should just go over to the office and
invite Mulder to come over later and bring his overnight bag. This
thought and the expression she imagined on his face brought out
another grin and she sat that way for a while, looking out over the
Tidal Basin.
"Hey," she said with a slight smile. "I was just going to go over
to the office to look for you." She thanked God that whatever color
was left on her face would be attributed to the exercise and not her
current train of thought.
"I'm going back there after I finish my run," he said, shifting his
weight from his left leg to the right leg. A fine sheen of
perspiration was appearing on his forehead and he wiped it with the
sleeve of his sweat-soaked T-shirt. "You don't usually take this
route, do you?"
He looked over at the nearest tree, his mouth twisted into a toothy
grin while he bounced up and down on his heels. "Beautiful." He
turned back toward her. "So that's why you weren't answering your
phone."
She raised an eyebrow, pulling her other leg up on the bench and
hugging both against her chest. "You called me this morning?
What's up?"
She kept her face blank, taking her time while pretending to be
thinking about her non-existent plans instead of the possibility of
sex that very evening. "I don't think I have anything planned," she
replied in a non-committal tone, just in case he pulled a couple of
plane tickets and an X File out of the air. Like she'd refuse him,
anyway.
He stopped bouncing and moved over to the bench, sitting down next
to her. He looked out at the water, resting his elbows on his knees
and sucking on his lower lip. She was beginning to think she had
played it too well and he was backing off when turned his head and
looked at her, his eyes warm and a smile playing on his moist lips.
"Keeping your options open, Scully?"
She stared at him. He knew exactly what she had been doing.
Bastard. She ought to invent a pre-planned appointment, just to get
even. But she'd already decided to make the effort, so she bit back
her retort, gave him a withering glare and leaned back on the bench.
"Alright, Mulder, as you already know, except for a few loads of
laundry my whole weekend is open. Tell me what's on your mind."
He smiled over his shoulder at her fondly, his eyes running over her
quickly before turning his face back toward the water. He shrugged,
then looked at her again, still grinning. "I just thought I'd offer
you dinner since you fed me the last time."
He looked at her, his smile fading and his eyes growing serious.
There were multiple levels on which he could address that question,
and choosing the right one was important. She met his gaze full-on.
After a long moment, he deadpanned, "Maybe you should taste my
cooking before you ask that question."
She kept her eyes on his and felt her breathing quicken as they
continued to look at each other. He'd chosen the light, safe
response, but the looks said otherwise. So they both felt it was
time that they moved things ahead. The truth be told, she'd
probably known Mulder had been ready for a while now and he was just
waiting for her to catch up to him. Staring out across the water
she slowly leaned forward until she was sitting the same way that he
was, her elbows on her knees, their shoulders brushing. After a
long pause she turned her head toward him until their faces were
mere inches apart.
His response was nearly a croak, and an octave lower than usual at
that. "Seven."
She nodded slightly, then slowly leaned in and gently pressed her
lips against his. "I wouldn't miss it," she said softly, nudging
his nose with hers, then pulled back with a smile.
He grinned, cleared his throat and leaned back on the bench, looking
out at the water once again. After a few moments of silence, he
asked flirtatiously, "so, tell me what's on your mind, Scully."
She stood and gave him THE look, shaking out her leg muscles then
leaning forward and grabbing her ankles. He was an intelligent man,
she had no doubt he'd figure it out.
"I ran all the way here," she replied without looking up.
"Why don't you let me drive you? My car's parked over on Maine."
His gaze was blatantly direct.
"...it's worth doing well." She finished for him, stopping in her
tracks with a look of surprise on her face. How he managed to come
up with these things at precisely the right time never failed to
amaze her. "Where the hell did that come from?"
He grinned with the satisfaction that always came from throwing her
off balance. "Dean Woodforde, my second-year college advisor. It
just popped into my head." He shrugged.
She shook her head. She wouldn't admit it to him, but sometimes she
was inclined to wonder about the possibilities of a psychic
connection. "My mother said that to me last night."
She looked at him a moment, and began jogging in place again. "It
is now," she replied, suddenly full of nervous energy, then turned
and jogged off the way she came, pounding out the familiar rhythm
and looking up with renewed interest at the cherry blossoms as she
passed underneath each tree.
A few moments later he fell into stride beside her and she glanced
up at him. He was looking up at the trees just as she had done, his
mouth hanging open as his eyes took in the splendor of the delicate
pink petals. His face was like a child's - full of hope and wonder.
'My appetite,' she thought with an inward smile, turning and jogging
in place to watch him continue down the street, graceful and lithe.
'My appetite will be bringing me.'
xox
Scene V: Anticipation
He'd had a good hour since the plane took off from National to think
about it, and it all came down to one thing. He should have stayed
out of the office.
But she deserved better. They both did. Not that his cooking and
his apartment, clean or otherwise, symbolized the crowning pinnacle
of their relationship, but he wasn't a hundred percent sure that she
was even ready to allow him into her body, or if she was slowly
opening herself up to more possibilities. He was a fairly patient
man...more possibilities with Scully weren't what he was
anticipating, but it was still a good thing.
In the end he did get a reprieve from the anticipation, delivered by
a bald and bespectacled Assistant Director just dropping off a file
for him to take a look at on Monday morning. "This came in the
pouch from the Miami office this morning. It's got your name
written all over it," he'd said as he handed him the file.
After half a dozen phone calls it was four o'clock and he was
telephoning Scully to apologize for the late notice, telling her to
pack for warm weather and meet him at the airport in an hour.
She hadn't said much since she arrived, crisp and polished in her
trademark black suit and heels. She'd asked where they were going
and asked to see the file, settling down into a preformed plastic
terminal seat next to him while he cracked his way through a small
pile of sunflower seeds, waiting for their flight to be called.
Their flight was full and since they were flying at the last minute
they were relegated to standby. They were told by the schedule-
minded flight attendant to find any two available seats, and after
the flight had taken off they would try to move people around so
that they could sit together. Scully got the first seat, on the
aisle near the back, and Mulder was a couple of rows behind her.
His backup plan was shot to hell, because he really wanted to spend
some time with Scully in lieu of their broken date. He wanted to
talk. The subject was incidental. He wanted to look into her eyes
and watch the emotion flicker across her face as she processed his
responses. He wanted to see her eyes flash as she responded back.
He wanted to watch the way her tongue darted out to the corner of
her mouth just before she was about to challenge him.
With this thought came the awareness that as he had been staring
intently at his pretty partner, someone had been staring at him, and
he turned his head to the left to meet two large, black, almond-
shaped eyes sizing him up.
"That woman with the red hair. You've been staring at her."
He regarded the child, no more than twelve years old. She wore
sneakers, jeans and a T-shirt that said 'Tanglewood' and across her
lap was a music book that looked like a pen had exploded across it.
The girl gave him a narrow-eyed look that said, 'yeah, right' and
turned back to her music, her straight, blunt-cut black hair falling
forward and obscuring her face.
The girl looked up at him again, blinking. "Don't you know who I
am?" she asked, indignant.
After noting with disgust the fact that the airline served Coke, not
Pepsi, he stood, moving over to stand in the aisle beside Scully.
She closed the file and looked up at him. "Well, I don't deny that
there's something unusual about the way the bodies were arranged,
although I'd say that whoever took the time to place them that way
is very much of this world."
Scully raised her eyebrows at him, mouthed "we'll talk later" and he
returned to his seat without getting to finish his sentence.
The flight attendant had moved on down the aisle with her beverage
cart and Miss Kimberly Toomornsoontorn was sawing away on an
imaginary violin, her eyes closed in concentration as her right
elbow repeatedly jabbed him in the arm on the down bow. Each impact
to his arm resounded in smaller jolts throughout his body, causing
the soda to jiggle along the edges of the glass while he gripped the
armrest in a futile attempt to remain still.
"Do you mind?" he'd asked the girl with more than a little edge in
his voice, but she was too engrossed to hear him, or perhaps she was
simply ignoring him.
It was times like this, when for whatever reason he was forced to be
an observer to his partner's experience, that he would be struck by
the unfair advantage that he had over her by simply being male. It
was criminal, the things that Scully had to endure as a woman.
They'd be involved in an investigation, completely immersed in what
they were doing, and an in a matter of seconds she could be totally
discounted, reduced to nothing more than a stereotype by just one
narrow-minded individual. It didn't matter to them that she was
intelligent, capable, patient, selfless and non-judgmental. The
fact that she was so pretty only made it worse.
An object.
A cunt.
It made his temper flare to think about the labels pinned on her.
Assertiveness made her a bitch. Professionalism made her cold. No
one who knew her could ever think such a thing. Not if they really
knew her. But she'd have something to say about that line of
defense. Every woman has dealt with gender-based prejudice, she'd
argue. She accepted the labels stoically, rarely allowing him to
see how much it bothered her when the issue of her gender came up.
Giving credence to it would only make it a larger issue. She was an
agent, and a damn fine agent at that. She was his partner. His
equal in every sense of the word, and in some circumstances, his
superior.
And yet, wasn't it he who had spent the better part of the day in
anticipation of getting into her pants? What made him any different
than the other mindless pricks out for the same thing? He'd always
thought she was hot. Alone in the darkness of his apartment he
wasn't above jerking off while he replayed images of her, both real
and imagined, in his mind.
He'd never reduced her to nothing more than her gender, though. For
him, Scully's mind and her loyalty were her most attractive assets.
She knew how he felt about her. He was completely devoted to her,
and he was aware that she was devoted to him as well. Despite his
carnal impulses, she was his friend above all else, and the only
woman or person in the world he could see himself spending the rest
of his life with, both professionally and personally.
"Would you like some towels, Sir?" she asked, noticing the evidence
of his dilemma despite the cover of the magazine and keeping a safe
distance while handing him a stack of paper towels that probably
wouldn't do any good as the frigid liquid was now completely soaked
into the fabric and his skin.
"Mulder," she said in her mildly scolding tone of voice, giving him
the 'what the Hell did you do now?' look.
Then one of the lavatory doors opened, and a rather portly man
stepped out just as the saccharine flight attendant returned with
the beverage cart, forcing them to step back against the emergency
exit to allow the portly gentleman enough room to pass by the cart
and into the aisle. The cold air seeping in from the cracks around
the door irritated his wet spot, making him shiver while he imagined
his manhood shriveling into oblivion in his pants as he pressed the
paper towels against himself for added protection. It was not the
direction he'd hoped it would be going that evening.
"Excuse me," the beverage cart maven said without sincerity as she
pushed the cart past them. Scully looked at Mulder with empathy,
noticing his shivering and rubbing his arm ineffectively, although
it felt good to him, anyway. By the time the beverage cart was out
of the way and the path was clear, the lavatory was once again
occupied.
"Mulder." Scully's voice was calm, and she waited until he directed
his attention her way. "What was it you were saying about the
photographs? Something about the angle of the limbs?"
Mulder sighed, rolled the soiled paper towels into a ball and tossed
them along with the magazine into a slot in the kitchenette or
whatever you called it that looked like it was meant for trash.
Reaching for the file, he opened it, moving behind her so that he
could look over her shoulder.
"Okay, if you look at the placement of the bodies and the exact
angle of the limbs from the ground, on first glance it appears to be
methodical, ritualistic." He pointed at several photos from the
crime scene. "However, if you were to view the scene from above,
say, twenty or thirty feet, you'd see that the killer didn't
position the bodies in a ritualistic way, but was in fact using them
to form symbols."
She looked up at him. "What kind of symbols?"
"You tell me." He pulled a piece of paper out of his jacket pocket,
unfolded it and handed it to her. "I was working on it at the
airport while I was waiting for you. Does that look anything like
the symbols you saw on your spacecraft?"
Her eyes grew wide as she stared at him, and neither of them noticed
that their conversation was beginning to draw curious glances from
the flight attendants and the passengers seated nearby. "I'm...not
sure," she said in a tremulous voice, looking at the paper he had
handed her. "I don't think so. I'd have to compare it to the
photographs I took of the craft, but these symbols appear to be more
square, like Russian, or Greek, maybe."
As she looked back up into his face, out of the corner of her eye
she saw the flight attendants staring at them in horror, the
gruesome murder scene photographs clearly visible in their hands.
Mulder followed her line of vision and they glanced at each other.
Scully rolled her eyes just as the lavatory door behind her was
thrown open, knocking her into her partner and scattering the crime
scene photos to the floor.
"You were saying?" he said, his eyes blazing and letting her know
her that he'd had all he could take in one day of others outside of
their intimate circle of two.
She looked back at him in commiseration and they both became aware
at the same time of the less than fresh aroma of the disinfectant
and other odors confined within the airtight compartment. Scully
let out a huff and closed her eyes in defeat. Her head fell forward
against his chest and he placed a hand on her shoulder, rubbing
gently.
Lifting her face up to his, she looked into his eyes with a slight
smile and sighed. "No, it hasn't."
"I know, Mulder." She stopped him, before he could respond or offer
her a raincheck. She took a deep breath. "This is what we do.
It's fine."
"Yes, Scully, it's what WE do," he replied sharply. "WE being the
operative word. As in, you and me."
She shifted her stance a bit, moving back what little amount she
could to create more room, until her back side was pressed against
the sink. "Yeah...so?"
"I know. You don't expect. But you should. I want you to." She
let out an impatient huff and he put his other hand on her cheek.
"I didn't get involved in a relationship with you so that I'd have
something to do between cases, or because it was the convenient
thing to do. The truth is, it's not convenient. You're my partner
and my closest friend and I should run the other way in order to
protect that at all costs." A slight smile played on her lips.
They both knew it was against his nature to run from any challenge.
His voice dropped to nearly a whisper. "But you're also the person
I most want to be with, Scully. The first one I think about in the
morning and the last one I think about before I go to sleep. And I
think that distinction carries a fair amount of responsibility with
it...like the right to expect things from me. Things like...keeping
promises."
She closed her eyes for a moment, then looked back up at him openly.
"I know you will, Mulder. Not because I expect it, but because it's
part of who you are." He took a deep breath, looking at her
intensely, and she continued. "Maybe I do expect things from you,
Mulder. I expect you to behave in accordance to what I know of you.
That's why I can't be upset when you cancel a dinner or show up at
my door at three-thirty in the morning. Your work is your driving
force, the source of your passion. It always has been, as long as
I've known you. And I accept that fact."
There was a silent pause. "You're important to me, too," she said
softly, laying her hands on his chest. "That's why I've been
hesitant to allow this relationship to move ahead too quickly. We
can't separate ourselves from the work and there's too much at stake
to rush into it without considering all of the consequences. But
I've always known that the work had to be our first consideration."
She smiled, slightly embarrassed. "Not for the reason you think.
I've reached some decisions, Mulder, and I think you'll be happy
with what I've decided." She looked up briefly, a spark in her
eyes, and he smiled in understanding. "But I'd be lying if I said
that I'm not as curious as you are about the meaning behind the
placement of those bodies out there on the beach."
He grinned, wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close, and
her arms slid around his waist as she buried her face into his
chest, inhaling his scent deep into her lungs. Their embrace went
on for a long while and he rubbed his hand up and down her lower
back lightly, thinking about all of the things he would do and tell
her without the distraction of a case when they finally got back
home.
Then again, she'd said that they can't separate themselves from the
work. So maybe they shouldn't keep it separate. Maybe they should
grab whatever moment they could and make the most of it. As long as
they kept private matters...well, private.
Her fingers were kneading his flesh like a contented cat and his
touch became more deliberate, seeking to arouse. She responded with
a contented hum and the atmosphere grew thick...sensual. They were
now completely open about the future of their relationship and
weren't masking their desire from each other anymore. As the
pattern of their breathing changed, Scully nuzzled her nose into his
neck, pressing her lips against his skin. Her tongue flicked out
for a brief taste, causing him to groan before she pulled back
slightly to look up at him.
Her eyes were large and dark, glowing warmly and despite his wet
trousers he felt himself growing very, very aroused. He leaned down
and kissed her, not caring if she felt his erection pressing against
her stomach as he stroked the inside of her mouth with his tongue.
"You wanna join the Mile High Club, Scully?" he whispered into her
ear, his voice low and deadly serious.
If there had been just a little more room, and if the lights hadn't
flickered along with the announcement to return seat backs and tray
table to their full, upright and locked position, Mulder would have
effectively changed her mind. He was beginning to learn what would
garner a response and how she would react. But a flight attendant
was tapping on the door, asking them to take their seats and Scully
was looking at him with anticipation as to how he planned to
continue.
"Your pants are wet," she said with a mischievous smile, looking
down at his trousers.
"People have been talking about us for years. You wanna make it a
valid conversation?"
She let out a breath and closed her eyes. "God, yes. But you owe
me dinner first."
"Why?"
"Okay."
"You first." He slid the door open and she stepped out, walking
down the aisle in her most professional manner even though he was
using her as a human shield. Mulder heard Miss Toomornsoontorn
speak to Scully as she took his place, pulling the SkyMall magazine
out of the seat pocket and laying it down on the seat so that she
wouldn't get wet.
"Do YOU know who I am?" the girl asked as Scully fastened her
seatbelt.
Mulder sat in Scully's seat and glanced at her over his shoulder,
seeing her give the girl a beautiful smile.
"That man with the big nose. You were in the bathroom with him for
a really long time."
Mulder glanced over his shoulder again, and Scully looked up to meet
his gaze. "We prefer the word 'partner'."
All things considered, his future was looking pretty damn good.
xox
The dinner had been consumed, the table was cleared and the dishes
cleaned and put away. Mulder was in the kitchen finishing the last
of the cleanup while she stood in his living room, staring unseeing
at a framed print on the wall.
Seven years together and it all came down to this one night, she
thought ruefully. Everything seemed to be taking on a warped
significance - inside jokes, catch phrases, past mistakes, emotional
revelations. It was as if their entire history had been condensed
into a few moments that they revisited like a time capsule, opened
for re-examination and reflection in the new era.
As he wiped the water drops off of the countertop with a dish towel
Mulder's thoughts were not on the evening ahead nor on their
collective past, but a reflection on the past hour. When he had
heard her familiar tap on his door he was both relieved and
petrified that the moment had arrived at last, a moment which he had
anticipated for a very long while.
They hadn't spoken of their intentions since they stepped off of the
airplane in Miami for their last case, eight days ago. When they
returned from Miami on Wednesday they'd gone about their usual
routine - filling out forms, writing reports and talking about
insignificant, safe things like the news and weather.
She had agreed to the date and showed up on time, backlit with a
soft glow from the hallway as she stood in the doorway to his
apartment, looking up at him with warm eyes. He glanced down with a
gleam, taking in her casual, comfortable cotton shirt and trousers
and pausing on the overnight bag slung over her left shoulder. She
ran her eyes over his black pullover and jeans, met his eyes again
then confidently stepped inside.
As he shut the door behind him she moved into the living room,
dropping her bag to the floor near the sofa. Sliding off her coat,
she crossed the room to hang it on the coat rack while he shifted
from foot to foot, watching with amusement as she staked her claim
literally in his apartment and metaphorically in his personal life.
She turned toward him, and rolling up the sleeves on her blouse with
an eyebrow raised and a spark in her eye, asked, "So what are we
having for dinner?"
A slight smile formed on his face as he held her eyes for a moment.
"Hungry?"
He grinned and walked into the kitchen, pulling on the oven door and
stepping back slightly as steam rose out of the opening. "How does
chicken grab you?"
She had followed him in to the kitchen, and peering into the oven,
inhaled deeply. "It smells really good, actually."
"I'm sure you can, Mulder. I see you even peeled carrots and
potatoes." She looked again. "And whole cloves of garlic."
Either way she would be tasting garlic all night and she looked down
with a smile of defeat. He grinned, stepping around her to the
range top and pulling the lid off of a sauce pan, condensation
dripping off of the lid. "Look, I opened a jar a spaghetti sauce,
too."
"Mmmmm," she hummed with a fair amount of sarcasm as she joined him
in front of the stove.
She was standing very close and he leaned in closer, briefly running
his eyes over her in a very predatory way. "Still hungry?"
"You bet." She smiled slightly, looking into his eyes as he moved
closer still. "You?"
"I just need to set the table and then we can eat," he said, already
moving away to retrieve the dinnerware from the far cabinet as she
caught her breath. She crossed her arms and leaned against the
countertop, watching him in all of his domestic bliss. "Silverware
is in that drawer there, Scully."
With her help they set the table and Mulder poured the wine and
served dinner, giving her extra cloves of garlic with a grin, which
she separated into a pile on the edge of her plate with her fork.
She complimented his culinary skill on her first bite, then they
both fell silent as they enjoyed their meal.
Mulder had been surprised at her apparent ease with the situation
when she'd arrived. She seemed confident and carefree, unlike
himself. Riddled with inner turmoil, he was excited but nervous as
hell. This night was a milestone, an event of great import that he
had both anticipated and fantasized about for longer than he would
ever admit to her. Not just an event, but a beginning. It was a
night that they would both remember long into the future and
performance anxiety was no small factor.
Unbeknown to him, she had been sitting there thinking the exact same
thing.
He was only halfway through his meal with he felt he'd had enough
inner turmoil, laid down his fork with deliberate slowness and
looked at her. "Tell me I'm not the only one on pins and needles
here."
She wiped her mouth, inhaled slowly and without looking back at him,
said, "you're not."
She swallowed, her face serious as she looked at him. "How long?"
He hesitated, biting his lower lip. "1994."
Her surprise showed before she could mask it, and she looked down at
her plate. He studied her moment, uncertain at first, then
understanding why she had been surprised. "You thought Diana and
I..." he looked away and letting the rest of the sentence die.
A slow grin appeared on his face and she shifted in her seat.
"Jealousy?"
She avoided his eyes as long as she could, then looked back up, her
lips pursed. "This isn't any great revelation, Mulder."
His smile slowly faded and his eyes grew serious. Nodding slightly,
he looked down. "No, I guess not." He smiled again, wistfully,
looking back at her. "I could have been more forthcoming about the
situation. I guess I needed some kind of confirmation that you felt
something more than just friendly concern."
She held his gaze a long moment. She realized that she had felt the
same way on more than one occasion, and looked away, taking another
deep breath. "I guess we're both guilty of that."
Mulder picked up his wine glass and studied it. He took a sip, put
the glass down and looked at her again. "How long?"
She didn't return his look, staring at her potatoes instead. "Not
so long."
He could feel his stomach begin to churn as his mind cataloged the
familiar list of possibilities, noting with unease that there could
be men that he didn't even know about on that list. "Padgett?"
She shook her head. "No. I didn't lie to you about that."
"Was there..." he paused, changing his mind and deciding not to ask,
running farther down the list. He drew a breath, knowing he'd found
the one, and sat back in his seat. "Jerse."
She didn't reply, but from the look on her face, she didn't need to.
It had been a difficult time for the both of them and they'd never
really talked about it. Time and an effort by both parties to be
more open helped, but it was still an uneasy subject to broach.
She drew in a deep breath and held it. "I didn't plan it. At
least, not consciously. Maybe subconsciously, I don't know..." her
voice trailed off, and she looked down at her lap. "I needed to
feel...important...wanted. It had been so long since anyone had
looked at me the way...he did, and you were going on and on about
how I was just a watchdog, merely assigned to the job..." she
paused.
She raised her head and looked him in the eye and he closed his eyes
to her penetrating stare. "Alright, maybe I did bring up the fact
that you were assigned. But anyway, you said it wasn't about me."
She let out a soft snort. "At that time, I believed it wasn't."
She drew in another deep breath and looked at him, this time without
the attitude. "I've always had this rebellious streak, Mulder, and
when I reach my limit on tolerance I lash out without considering
the consequences." His eyes registered his understanding. "In
retrospect, I think I wanted to hurt you."
She looked down, closing her eyes to his pained expression. "I'm
sorry," she said softly.
He turned and faced her, crossing his arms and leaning against the
counter. "I'm sorry too, Scully. I didn't realize that you felt
that way until you were ready to quit following the bombing in
Dallas. I should have told you a long time ago how important you
are to me. I had my head so far up my ass that I couldn't see what
you were feeling."
She closed her eyes briefly, then looked down. Taking a fortifying
breath, she raised her eyes back to his. "What was she to you,
Mulder? Diana Fowley...I know you had feelings for her, but you've
never told me who she was to you."
He drew in a breath. He'd avoided the issue long enough but that
didn't mean he was prepared to deal with it. Scully had come clean
about Jerse, though, and he owed it to her to tell her the truth,
especially since she'd asked.
She looked down, a shaky breath giving her away. He walked over and
crouched down in front of her, taking hold of her hands.
"She wasn't a part of me the way you are, Scully. When I was with
Diana it was like a confirmation of my thoughts and beliefs. There
was comfort in that, but it wasn't fulfilling. We worked well
together, but there was always something missing. Something I never
would have realized if it weren't for you." She looked into his
eyes, and he smiled, his voice growing softer. "YOU fill in the
missing parts. YOU make me reach for the answers to all of the
questions, not just the ones that I consider important. YOU bring
the entire picture into focus."
Scully looked down again, smiling, then back into his eyes. "You do
the same for me." He grinned, and she gave his hands a quick
squeeze. "We've both had relationships with people we worked with
that didn't turn out so well. It's no wonder we've avoided this for
so long."
Mulder studied her face, looking for and not finding the answer to
the question he wanted to ask, so he asked.
The answer for him, of course, WAS Dana Scully. "Some things never
change," he said with a grin, and she smiled.
"Some things you have to grow in to." Her eyes were warm as she
reached out and brushed the hair off of his forehead, cupping his
cheek and running her thumb lightly over his cheekbone.
He began running water and moving dishes around on the counter and
she wandered into the living room, looking at small things as if it
was the first time she'd ever been there. She never really had
looked at Mulder's things other than in passing, even though she'd
been in his apartment dozens of times over the years. It was
different now, though. She wasn't here for work, or because she was
checking up on him as a concerned friend.
She was here to stay the night. They were going to make love.
It was what she wanted, but she still had a fair amount of
apprehension. Would she be adequate enough for him? She wasn't an
overly demonstrative or uninhibited lover. She wasn't frigid,
either. But as Mulder's lover, would she be able to satisfy him?
She didn't know much about his preferences, but from what
indications she did have she was already shorter and less endowed in
the bustline than his previous choice in lovers.
Not that such things were terribly important when you considered the
bigger picture, but she was feeling off-balance enough to let it
tilt the scale even farther.
Her thoughts ran away with her as she stood in the center of his
living room, and she sensed, rather than felt Mulder's presence
behind her. His breathing was different - the cadence was much
quicker, shallower. He was inhaling and exhaling through his mouth
and it sounded almost as if he was afraid to breathe, and she felt
her own breathing quickening in the same way.
It was time.
Her partner and her best friend. Mulder. She wanted him. God, she
wanted him. Every nerve in her body was on alert waiting for the
feel of his hands on her body. He would be gentle but she knew it
wouldn't be a casual or friendly touch. It would be the touch of a
lover.
Mulder's touch.
He was charged like a live wire. Here he was with Scully, about to
make love. The answering machine was turned on, the cell phone was
turned off. No more interruptions. If it's worth doing, it's worth
doing well. And oh, was it worth it.
He knew from her stillness and the quickening of her breath that she
was nearly as excited as he was. He stepped forward, and when his
hands glided along her waist and slid around to her abdomen she let
the air out of her lungs slowly, covering his hands with her own and
closing her eyes when he pressed himself against her back side,
drawing in a deep breath.
It was new, and it was exciting, but at the same time it was old and
comfortable. They knew each other so well, trusted each other with
their lives and their hearts. There was heat where their bodies
touched and she turned her head slightly so that her cheek was
pressed against his chest. She could hear his rapid heartbeat and
feel his short puffs of air against her neck as they gave free reign
to the feelings of arousal and the inevitability of what was to
come. He turned his head to see her face, her closed eyes and
parted lips, and then rotated his palms under hers so that they
faced up, linking their fingers together and giving a gentle squeeze
of reassurance.
Keeping her eyes closed, her lips turned up in a smile at the sweet
gesture. She squeezed his hands back in response and he pressed a
soft kiss against her temple then gently raised their hands up into
the air, over her head. He linked her hands together behind his
neck, feeling her fingers slide through his hair as he let go.
Then he pressed his face into her hair, inhaling her fragrance as
his hands slowly but deliberately ran down her arms and her sides,
barely brushing the edges of her breasts as he returned to her small
waist. He had a confident touch, but it wasn't rough. He pressed
another kiss to the top of her head, massaging her waist with his
thumbs before he slid his hands underneath the tail of her shirt and
let the pads of his fingertips trace small circles on her bare skin.
She let out a soft giggle and he smiled, turning to see her face
again. "Does that tickle?"
She nodded slightly, her fingers gently moving through the hair at
the back of his head. "Mmm hmmm. Don't stop."
Her eyes were still closed when he released the bottom button of her
shirt, moving up the line until all of the buttons had been freed.
Letting out a breath of air, she dropped her arms and wrapped them
around him backwards as best she could, only managing to reach the
backs of his thighs. His fingertips skimmed over her abdomen,
letting the tips of his fingers trace a line up the middle of her
chest before sliding the flat of his palms gently over her breasts.
His eyes traveled between her face and his hands. Her cheeks were
flushed a light pink and her lips were parted and slightly swollen,
stained a deep shade of red despite the fact that her lipstick had
mostly worn off during dinner.
Scully. This was his Scully, soft and hard, warm and cool, standing
in his arms while he touched her freely every where in every way
he'd always wanted to. He was growing hard, feeling the tightening
in his groin with every second that his hands touched her skin.
Breathing a little faster, he cupped a breast in each palm, letting
his thumbs rub over the stiff peaks through the cup of her pretty
lavender bra while she let out another small breath of air, still
under careful control.
Pressing his lips against the shell of her ear, he slid his hands
back down her stomach and up to her breasts again, caressing, back
down again, all the while tracing circles on her skin with the pads
of his fingers.
She opened her eyes, watching his hands run over her skin. He had
beautiful hands, she thought as she watched him, her breath coming
faster and shorter. Long, elegant fingers and sure, strong hands.
They looked so big and dark against her pale skin and that thought
further excited her somehow.
On the trip back down her abdomen his hands stopped over the
waistband of her trousers. His fingers ran back and forth over the
skin just above the waistband and she pressed her body back into
him, feeling the full-effect of his arousal against her lower back.
He pressed back against her and they both drew in a sharp breath.
She let her head fall back against his chest and slightly arched her
back as he moved one palm down the front of her trousers, over her
thigh and back up the front again while the other hand moved back up
to her breasts. His hands moved back to play along the edge of the
waistband again, then down over her trousers again, and when his
fingers slid underneath the fabric she broke the silence, whispering
his name softly as encouragement.
She was quickly losing her ability to think beyond the sensation of
Mulder's hands and what they were doing to her. His fingers were
warm against her abdomen, gently grazing over her skin. Farther
down, he traced the lacy elastic of her panties with the pads of his
fingers as he caressed her hip bone through the material of her
trousers with the thumb of his other hand. He slid his fingers
underneath the elastic, then he pushed farther, beyond the lace to
the curls underneath.
She opened her mouth and let out a slow breath. He only paused
slightly before going even further, running the pad of his middle
finger over her labia in feather-light touches. When he pressed
just a bit more firmly and made contact with her clitoris she
whispered, "Oh God."
At the breathless sound of her voice he added the pad of his ring
finger, minutely circling the small bundle of nerves while using his
index and pinkie fingers to spread the outer folds open wider.
She drew in a sharp breath at the change in pressure as his fingers
circled more freely and he encountered the full extend of her
wetness.
She clutched his arm above her waistband and he slid his hand out of
her pants, linking her fingers with his sliding them back inside,
pressing her fingers alongside his on her clitoris.
"Show me how to touch you," he whispered against her ear, his voice
deep and rough.
"Sweet," he said, licking her fingers once more before moving her
hand back down and laying it over his forearm once again.
His fingers had never stopped moving against her and he reached up
and wrapped his other arm around her chest, holding her against him.
Watching her face again, he slowly pushed the middle and ring
fingers inside of her, curling his body around hers in order to do
so. She reached up and slid her hand over his cheek, turning her
face and pressing it into his neck, whispering his name once more.
Focused on nothing but sensation, she met his kiss open mouthed and
hungry. There was no more pretension, nothing to hide. She
urgently pulled on the tail of his pullover, breaking their kiss
long enough for him to help her slip it over his head. Their mouths
rejoined wildly and he pulled her against him, sliding his hands
under her opened blouse and pushing it off of her shoulders.
While she rotated her shoulders to release the blouse from her arms
he worked on the hooks of her bra, popping them open and pushing the
straps down over her shoulders for her to repeat the process.
When skin met skin chest to chest they both broke their kiss to gasp
in pleasure. She reached between them with both hands to release
the top button on his jeans and he clasped a hand over her wrist,
hastily pulling her into the bedroom. Hands and mouths reached for
any available skin as the remaining clothing was shed and they
tumbled awkwardly onto the bed, rolling and squirming until Mulder
was on top of her, hard between her legs and covering her from head
to foot in warmth. She let out a deep sigh and closed her eyes, her
body relaxing with satisfaction and he knew without words that she
was ready.
Nothing could have prepared him for the reality of making love to
Scully. His heart would pound when he imagined it, alone in his
apartment or in a motel room while on assignment. But when he
slipped inside of her there was no way he could have known until
that moment what it felt like to have her quivering underneath him
and around him as he looked into her eyes, seeing her completely
open and unguarded. He had never known that she would whisper
encouragement in mindless ecstasy while her arms and legs tightened
around him, or cut into the flesh of his buttocks with her
fingernails as he whispered "let it happen" into her parted lips.
He'd never been able to create the feeling of awe and wonder that
accompanied her release, and when his own release came just after,
the liquid sensation of her inner walls slowly undulating around him
as they gradually regained control of their other senses.
She would most remember the sensation and the emotional impression
of taking Mulder into her body for the first time. The intense
pleasure as he entered her, the burning throbbing as they moved
together, and the uncontrollable need building from the very center
of her body with every thrust of his pelvis and his impossibly hard
cock, stimulating the bundle of nerves at her center beyond coherent
thought. She vocalized, she remembered, although what was said
wasn't part of the memory. She moved and she felt, and his eyes
were black and brilliant green as he loved her with them as much as
he did with his body.
They stared into each others' eyes, touched and kissed, explored and
tasted, and as the sensual took over once more he brought her to
orgasm again with his tongue and lips, and then again, wealthy with
his newly gained knowledge of what pleased her most.
He flopped onto his back with a grin, closing his eyes and
scratching, letting his hand lay loosely on his abdomen. She rolled
over onto her stomach, regarding him with exhausted, sated, sleepy
eyes.
Her voice was slurred as she spoke, the side of her face pressed
into the pillow. "Did you have any idea we would be so good at
this?"
He chuckled, turning his head to look at her. His eyes were red
from fatigue, making the irises look even greener in contrast. "I
had a pretty strong hunch."
She smiled, closing her eyes, then looked at him again, barely able
to keep her eyes open. "You know, I love you."
"I know, you told me. Although, it's good to hear even when you're
not screaming it in orgasm."
He rolled over onto his side, facing her, and brushed the hair back
from her face. "No, you don't. You were beautiful, anyway."
Her eyelids flickered, and the corners of her lips turned up again
gently. Scooting closer he enfolded her in his arms, pulling her
against him so that her head was resting on his chest. She slid her
arm up and wrapped her hand around his shoulder with a contented
sigh, and he closed his eyes, answering with a contented sigh of his
own.
They slept.
fin
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