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Literature Review - Demarco
Literature Review - Demarco
Krystal Demarco
Professor Wright
ENG.1201.B51
17 November 2021
How does having divorced parents affect mental health and future relationships?
Most people know at least one person who has divorced parents. In fact, it is estimated
that 72% of marriages fail within the first 14 years (Anderson 379). Many married couples have
children within this timeframe, and many of the children will be young when their parents decide
to divorce. Sadly, 20% of children will experience the divorce of their parents by the age of nine
(“Children of Divorced Parents”). What psychological effects can this have on a young child or
adolescent? How do their views on relationships differ after seeing their parents’ marriage fall
apart? In what ways can parents help their child with this life transition?
Children of divorce are more likely to suffer from psychiatric disorders like anxiety and
depression, attempt or commit suicide (Anderson 383), and develop substance abuse issues
(Halford). This can be traced back to not only the experience of divorce itself, but also the
circumstances surrounding the divorce. Children who witness their parents constantly fighting
and blaming each other for what is happening, as well as unclear parent-child communication
can have devastating effects on the child in the long run. It may cause children to feel more bitter
about the divorce and, ultimately, about themselves, which can have lasting effects all the way
into adulthood (Mosier). Furthermore, when the conflict that occurs in front of the child is severe
and frequent, the child is even more likely to experience long-term effects (Halford). While some
children may not experience this trauma of conflict, the separation may still negatively impact
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them long-term depending on their coping mechanisms and their mental state prior to the
divorce.
Coping with divorce does not come easy to a child. Communication is key. Tamara Afifi
and colleagues studied the differences between children who communicated well with their
parents and those who did not. They found that children who had good communication with their
parents had a higher level of resiliency following divorce than children who were not
comfortable communicating with their parents (21). The reason a child may not feel comfortable
talking to their parents does not necessarily stem solely from the divorce. Rather, the parent-child
relationship prior to the divorce plays a significant role in how a child will feel about
Another issue that children of divorce face is creating and maintaining relationships.
Most obviously, the father-child and mother-child relationships take a turn. This does not
necessarily mean that the relationships are bad, but divorce does mean that the child will spend
more time with one parent and less with the other. Depending on the custodial agreement, the
child may only see the non-custodial parent every other weekend. Dr. Sun-A Lee highlights the
resulting relational issues in her article “Romantic Relationships in Young Adulthood: Parental
Divorce, Parent-child Relationships During Adolescence, and Gender.” Lee asserts that there is a
decrease of closeness between the parents and children following divorce, and the
communication between them may also suffer (411-412). Overall, when there is less time spent
with one parent, there is often less communication, involvement, and bonding with the child.
Fathers oftentimes are not the parent who gains custody of the child. In his article
assessing father-child relationships following divorce, Professor Glenn Stone addresses several
factors that contribute to a father being less-than-present in his child’s life. Self-efficiency and
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role clarity of the father plays a drastic role in their parenting abilities after a divorce. Lack of
custody and limited time with the child can make a father feel as though they do not possess the
abilities to parent alone, and therefore are less likely to engage with the child (Stone 16).
Furthermore, mothers may prevent the child from seeing their father out of spite or for personal
reasons that have nothing to do with the child. In turn, an even more distant relationship between
Mother-child relationships are also affected when the mother is the non-custodial parent.
Sandra Kielty conducted a study on non-residential mothers and how they felt their relationship
with their child was affected by the divorce. Some mothers argued that by not having custody of
their child, the child was unable to receive the amount of emotional security and nurturing that
only a mother could give (Kielty 8). Kielty’s study further revealed that mothers felt they were
rejected by their child due to fatherly influence (9). Therefore, mother-child relationships are
Romantic relationships are also affected by parental divorce. Children of divorce have
more commitment issues, conflict, and infidelity in their romantic relationships when compared
to those with intact families (Lee 411). They are unwilling or unable to commit to a relationship
due to fear of abandonment (“Children of Divorced Parents”). How the child views the romantic
relationship stems from parental influence. Lee argues that if parents are supportive and involved
during adolescence, the child will have higher emotional security and more positive interactions
with future romantic partners (412). A child must first learn what love is and what love feels like
Social relationships become an issue when the child is forced to relocate due to the
divorce. If the custodial parent chooses to move to a different city, the child is forced to go with.
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The child must move away from everything they have come to know and love. Moving may
mean losing friends and support systems, as well as switching schools (Anderson 381), resulting
in a sense of loneliness and insecurity. These emotions cycle back to the potential of developing
The effects of parental divorce vary based on the age the child was at the time of the
event. K. Alison Clarke-Stewart and colleagues examine how divorce affects younger children
differently than older children. They claim that children of toddler and pre-school age have more
emotional and behavioral problems, distress, sociability troubles, and overall poorer adjustment
when compared to children who were ages 7-11 (305). The age gap between five and seven may
not seem like much, but before the child is in school, they are heavily reliant on their parents for
support. There is no school system for the child to turn to when they are in need. The only people
Some researchers suggest that there is little to no correlation between parental divorce
and future issues in children. Though divorce is not ideal, it is said that most children recover
and adapt well to their new reality rather quickly (“Children of Divorced Parents”). This may be
due to the underlying factor that the child has no choice but to accept what has happened. But
just because they accept it does not mean that it has not affected them. In fact, Jane Anderson
states that children of divorce are constantly reminded of their loss during special events and
holidays, and therefore may never have a full recovery (384). The claim originated from Judith
Wallerstein’s twenty-five-year study on the effects of divorce on children. Even in the light of
celebrating holidays and birthdays twice, the child is still reminiscent on a time when they could
spend these precious moments with both parents by their side. Each child responds differently to
Dr. Kim Halford, who focuses on couple relationship therapy and education, states that a
child will most likely do well following a divorce if the parents engage in mutual respect with a
focus on the child’s best interest. Divorce should occur only after the parents have burned
through every opportunity to keep their marriage thriving. If divorce is inevitable, parents should
strive to ensure that their child is kept in the loop in a way that does not place blame on the child
or one parent. Open sit-down discussions should be prevalent between the parents and child.
Additionally, conflict in front of the child should be avoided to reduce the potential of poor long-
term outcomes.
negative outcomes in the child. There should be statistical evidence proving that children of
divorce and children of intact families differ in terms of relationship quality and mental
diagnoses. Lastly, further research should be conducted on how outcomes for females and males
Works Cited
Affifi, Tamara D., et al. “Parents’ and Adolescents’ Communication with Each Other About
Divorce-related Stressors and Its Impact on Their Ability to Cope Positively with the
Divorce.” Journal of Divorce & Remarriage, vol. 45, no. ½, Aug. 2006, pp 1-30.
Anderson, Jane. “The Impact of Family Structure on the Health of Children: Effects of
Divorce.” The Linacre Quarterly, vol. 81, no. 4, Nov. 2014, pp 378-387. NCBI NLM
“Children of Divorced Parents.” Gale Opposing Viewpoints Online Collection, Gale, 2019. Gale
17 Nov. 2021.
Clarke-Stewart, K. Alison, et al. “Effects of Parental Separation and Divorce on Very Young
Children.” Journal of Family Psychology, vol. 14, no. 2, Jun. 2000, pp. 304-326.
Halford, Kim. “How Will My Divorce Affect My Kids?” The Conversation, 10 Sep. 2018.
Relationships During Adolescence, and Gender.” Journal of Child and Family Studies,
Mosier, William. “When Parents Divorce They Must Emotionally Support Their Children.”
Divorce and Children, edited by Roman Espejo, Greenhaven Press, 2015. Gale In
Nov. 2021.
Stone, Glenn. “An Exploration of Factors Influencing the Quality of Children’s Relationships
with Their Father Following Divorce.” Journal of Divorce & Remarriage, vol. 46, no. ½,