Professional Documents
Culture Documents
Kaizen - The Japanese Method For Transforming Habits, One Small Step at A Time
Kaizen - The Japanese Method For Transforming Habits, One Small Step at A Time
SARAH HARVEY
CONTENTS
Prologue: Kaizen & Me
Introduction
How to Start
Health
Work
Money
Home
Relationships
Stumbling Blocks
Acknowledgements
Endnotes
Picture Credits
PROLOGUE
KAIZEN AND ME
In September 2017, I decided to quit my job working for a
London publisher and move to Japan. I enjoyed my job and
had a fun social life but was feeling burnt out and anxious.
The political landscape was uncertain, and I was feeling
increasingly out of control. I tried to do yoga and practise
mindfulness as much as possible, but I found that it wasn’t
enough to combat the feelings of anxiety and instability I
had about the future. I wanted to change some of my
behaviours that I knew weren’t doing me any good but I
found it difficult to keep up with any new habits. In short: I
was tired, creatively uninspired and definitely needed a
break from my routine.
Sarah
INTRODUCTION
The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step
– Lao Tzu
You can tailor Kaizen to your own needs; you can choose to
do it at your own pace and work towards your own goals –
not anybody else’s. In doing so, you have the potential to
overhaul your current habits, acquire new skills and
knowledge, and abandon unproductive behaviours.
THE ROOTS OF KAIZEN
Kaizen is a noun in Japanese and is used to mean
improvement, whether that is big or small, one-time or
continuous. It is also sometimes used in relation to martial
arts, where the idea of improving one area of your practice
meticulously and slowly is encouraged. You are prompted to
focus on one thing at a time, simply, and to practise until
you get results. You could see the philosophy of Kaizen as
very much ‘East-meets-West’ in that the business theory
was actually conceived by the US government, but then
brought over and used to great effect in post-World War II
Japan, where the economy had been completely destroyed
by the war effort. Kaizen is credited with influencing the
huge success of Japanese companies in the second half of
the twentieth century and has since been popularized
around the world as an effective method for improving
existing habits and achieving success in a number of
different fields, from healthcare to psychotherapy to
government institutions.
The Kaizen philosophy assumes that our way of life – be it our working
life, our social life, or our home life – deserves to be constantly
improved.3
– Mr Masaaki Imai
There are a lot of problems in the world that are out of our
control. But for the parts of our lives over which we can
have more control, Kaizen is a great way to reduce sources
of stress and bring about new, exciting improvements.
While inept politicians and worries about climate change
aren’t going anywhere (unfortunately), Kaizen can be used
to bring more harmony into your immediate environment
and improve your wellbeing, so that you have more energy
to face and fight the problems of the wider world.
KAIZEN IN PRACTICE
We have introduced the concept and methodology behind
Kaizen and learned about how it can be used to rewire the
brain’s chemistry to make you more likely to stick to habits
and new challenges. Now let’s explore the practical
application and focus on particular areas in which Kaizen
can be transformative. The following chapters will show you
how to make changes to your life by introducing Kaizen into
your routine. Eventually it will feel like second nature.
HOW TO START
Kaizen starts with a problem, or more precisely, with the recognition
that a problem exists. – Mr Masaaki Imai15
THE METHOD
THE INVENTORY
This is a lot to take in, so at first try taking just one or two
areas and brainstorming those. You can come to the others
later. There will probably be some areas which immediately
spring to mind in terms of where you would like to see
change. You could be struggling to stay on a diet, or you
could feel stuck in a job that you hate but feel too
overwhelmed to look for another one. Although the big
things that leap out will be your priority, do not neglect
small things in the same area that could also be important
and are potentially the ‘quick wins’ to improving your life.
FOR EXAMPLE
Home: Living in a house-share
If you can identify an area that you want to improve but find
it difficult to pinpoint actions that might help, the following
chapters contain ideas for steps you can take in each area
of your life.
Note: There may be existing areas of your life that you wish
you could change but aren’t able to because of circumstances
that are out of your control. It could be that you are a carer for
a family member, suffering from an illness or unable to change
your job because of your location. If this is the case, try to
concentrate on other things you can do to improve your quality
of life or set yourself some new positive goals that you can
work towards. I have tried to include as many small and
inexpensive tips as possible for when it feels hard to make
progress.
EXAMPLES
I want to learn how to drive.
I want to reduce the balance on my credit card.
I would like to reconnect with an old school friend.
For any new challenges that you wish to take on, the first
step is to do a brainstorm of what these could be. Is there a
hobby you used to do at school that fell by the wayside
when life got in the way? Is there a country you have always
dreamed of visiting that you want to save up to go to? And
would you like to know some of the language before you go?
Or is there a physical or mental challenge you have always
fancied trying?
Once you have decided what this challenge could be, again
ask yourself some small questions about how you can get
started.
FOR EXAMPLE
NEXT STEPS
Once you have mapped out the various areas of your life on
which you wish to concentrate, it is time to prioritize. Ask
yourself whether there any ‘quick wins’ that can be sorted
out fairly easily, and, rather than overwhelm yourself at the
start, perhaps choose just one area to focus on (although it
is worth looking at all of your answers as a whole to see if
there are any overlaps or things that could be worked on in
unison, for example ‘I want to move about more’ and ‘I want
to learn Beyonce’s dance routine to “Single Ladies”’ could
be combined as one goal).
Once you have chosen your first area of focus, now is the
time to write down the smallest thing you can do to work
towards that goal. Remember the 1 per cent rule! It should
be something that will barely impact your routine and be a
tiny incremental step towards your goal.
FOR EXAMPLE
Now that you have an idea of what you want to achieve and
the first small measurable step you can do towards it, it is
time to find a way to make yourself accountable. Different
people will respond to different ways, but some ideas are:
REWARD YOURSELF
As well as tracking your achievements, a good way to feel
motivated is to reward yourself when you make progress.
Reaching some of your goals will feel rewarding enough –
especially if you are getting a boost in mood from better
sleep or doing more exercise – but some habits may feel
harder to change. And your rewards can be small, such as a
new notebook or a plant for your bedroom. This can spur
you on and encourage you to try to conquer even more
challenges. Another idea of a way to treat yourself could be
with fun cultural or social activities. For example, after
finally running 5K without stopping, why don’t you arrange
a celebratory karaoke night or night out with your friends?
Involving others in your rewards will mean that your friends
can both motivate you and hold you to account if you don’t
stick to your goals.
JOURNALING
The very first part of the Kaizen method is about taking
stock and interrogating your existing habitual behaviours.
Lots of books encourage readers to ‘keep a journal’ to do
this but don’t explain how.
Bullet journaling is a technique of creating and designing
your own type of journal, and, unlike the strict layout of a
diary (and the guilt that you feel when you inevitably miss
filling in an entry!), you are in control of the blank spaces
and can use it as much or as little as you want to. It isn’t
something that you necessarily have to engage with every
day. You can mould your journal to be the perfect tool to
track both your habits and your Kaizen goals.
When you reach the end of the month, take a look back and
see all that you have achieved and what you would like to
change for the next month. Amend the sections and habit
trackers as appropriate, then set up a new monthly
calendar, monthly goals and to-do list section, striking off or
moving forwards any relevant goal.
HEALTH | KENKŌ
Fall seven times, stand up eight – Japanese proverb
And if you are, like me, a person who hated sports lessons
at school, with traumatizing memories of having to go and
stand on a freezing field holding on to a hockey stick for
dear life while your teacher barked at you about how
useless you are (just me?!), then the thought of an exercise
class can be the most daunting thing. Thankfully, I hear
from my schoolteacher friends that things have improved
slightly on the PE-teaching front, but my fear of exercise
still remains, especially knowing that classes will contain
super-fit and toned people wearing sheer, bum-sculpting
leggings and barely looking sweaty after an hour-long spin
class.
SHORT-TERM GOALS
Find an unusual way to exercise. If you are a person who
hates the idea of a treadmill, then why not investigate a
swing dance class or a boxing class? Many gyms are waking
up to the fact that people don’t all want to exercise in the
same way and there are often less traditional offerings,
such as disco yoga, wrestling, circus skills, trampolining,
hula-hooping and even daytime raving (alcohol-free, of
course!). Thankfully gyms and local swimming pools are
also realizing that people don’t always want to sign up to a
monthly membership and are now offering drop-in classes
or pay-as-you-go memberships.
First Kaizen step: research the class and plan the outfit you
will need to wear for it.
First Kaizen step: plan the route that you would like to run in
advance. All experts advise that you should start off mostly
walking and then gradually introduce small runs intermittently
into your routine. Be Kaizen in your approach and you won’t go
too far wrong.
First Kaizen step: get off one stop earlier and walk the rest of
the way to work.
LONGER-TERM GOALS
First Kaizen step: try drinking a glass of water for every toilet
trip you take over the course of one day.
Once you have made one step towards your goal and
decided that it is benefitting you (if it is!) then think about
what next steps for progressing further towards your goal.
Could you start being vegetarian for two nights per week
rather than one? Or could you include one more
vegetarian/vegan recipe into your regular meal routine? Or
decide to eat veggie-only meals at home and then reserve
meat for when you are at restaurants? There are lots of
online articles and communities with plenty of tips to share;
why not try asking your friends and/or family for recipe
ideas too?
Don’t forget fruit and veg that you can store at home.
Remember that frozen, tinned and dried fruit and veg also
count. Think of one new way that you could consume fruit
or veg as a snack and start to introduce it into your routine.
PORTION CONTROL
First Kaizen step: use a smaller plate or bowl for just one
meal a week and see if it makes a difference to how much you
eat.
Don’t leave your leftovers in the pan. If you have made
enough food to keep leftovers, then try to divide out
individual portions into bowls or containers/freezer bags as
soon as you have cooked and plated up. That way, you will
have single portions in the future and it will discourage you
from eating the leftovers all in one go.
MINDFUL EATING
Eat one item mindfully. For one week, pick just one item
on your plate each day and concentrate on every mouthful
as you eat it. Once you have mastered this, extend this to
two items per day, and so on.
LONGER-TERM GOALS
For people who think they could benefit from even slightly
improved sleep, then Kaizen techniques are a great way to
alter your existing sleeping habits and adopt a new,
healthier bedtime routine. Not getting enough sleep or
waking up in the night for long periods can be caused by
external sources of stress: worries about work, friends,
family or big life changes, such as getting married or
moving house. This book contains lots of tips on how to use
Kaizen to reduce these sources of stress and better cope
with them when they do arise – but there is also lots that
can be done to improve your bedtime routine and
environment itself in order to promote a good night’s sleep.
Each morning for one week, make a note of the hours you
fall asleep and wake up, how many hours of sleep you have
each night in total, and whether you were awake for any
period. It is also a good idea to rate the quality of your sleep
out of ten. Our phones now have functionality that can help
to track sleep, although the benefits of removing technology
from the bedroom may outweigh the insight gained. Once
you have the information about your sleep patterns, have a
think and note down any factors which could have
influenced the quality of your sleep in a good or bad way.
For example:
Did you have any stimulants (caffeine, alcohol, nicotine) within two hours
of going to bed?
What was the temperature of your room?
How light/dark was it? How noisy was it?
How messy is your room?
Did you look at any screens before going to bed?
Is there anything you were/are stressed or worried about?
First Kaizen step: you might not always have huge amounts of
time to tidy your entire room before bed, so set a timer on your
phone for five minutes and just tidy up the area around your
bed, so at least that area is free of clutter.
First Kaizen step: if you are really tired and the idea of
changing your entire bed linen feels too much, then just change
your pillowcases and/or bedsheet. The rest can be done another
day!
Shut out the light. Your room should be as dark and cool
as possible. If you can’t afford blackout blinds or thick
curtains and find the room too bright, then try sleeping
with an eye mask and note any differences to the quality of
your sleep.
BEDTIME RITUALS
First Kaizen step: for one week, try meditating for five
minutes before bed.
Do a ‘brain dump’. If your brain is still whirring, another
idea is to get a piece of paper and write out a ‘brain dump’
of everything that is on your mind from that day. It doesn’t
have to be anything coherent or fully formed – just write out
everything that is troubling you. This can also be a really
useful exercise if you wake up in the middle of the night and
are unable to go back to sleep.
First Kaizen step: set your alarm five minutes earlier every
day for a week.
Hydrate when you first wake up. If you don’t have time
to make proper food, then you should at least find time to
have a snack and to hydrate yourself properly. Try adding in
an extra glass of water to your existing routine. Can you
have one as soon as you get out of bed? Or just before you
get in the shower? Or leave a bottle by the front door so
that you remember to take it for your commute?
First Kaizen step: install a detox app for one day and see
what a difference it makes to your phone usage.
First Kaizen step: turn off your notifications for one day and
reflect on how you feel afterwards. Has it made you feel less
anxious? Did you use your time better?
These tips are all very small things you can try in order to
see if they make a difference. The idea isn’t to be a
complete social hermit, but to be more mindful of your
phone usage and how it can harm your concentration levels
and the relationships with those around you. Making small
adjustments to your phone habits can have a transformative
effect. It can help to reduce your anxiety, sleep better and
connect with people on a less superficial level.
And you may find that you respond differently to all of these
things depending on your mood and mental health at that
certain moment. A bad picture you see of yourself may get
to you one day, but then on another day you could notice
that you are smiling sincerely or your hair looks nice.
Having good self-esteem is definitely not something to be
taken for granted and is something that can see-saw from
day to day. This is why it is imperative to do as many small
things as you can to bolster your self-esteem and to try your
best to ensure that your dips in confidence happen less and
less often.
TAKE STOCK
Take a step back and think about what the triggers are for
you feeling bad about yourself.
Try doing the activity below once a week and see if it has an
impact. This is a good exercise if you are having trouble
sleeping or if you want to relax before getting up in the
morning. Let it take as long as feels comfortable – for some
people this is five minutes, others might take half an hour.
If you find that this exercise has helped to relax and de-
stress you, try stepping it up by either increasing the
frequency with which you perform it or the length of time
that you spend doing it.
WORK | SHIGOTO
We spend a lot of our lives at work, especially if we live in
places with a culture of overtime and where people are
reluctant to take their annual-leave allocation, such as the
US and Japan. The Japanese even have a word, karoshi,
which means ‘death from overwork’. We are working longer
hours than ever before, and technological developments
now mean that we can be on the end of an email 24/7. To
try to tackle this, France brought in a new law in 2017
giving employees the legal right to not check emails out of
hours. But many other countries are lagging behind and
burnout from overwork is a very serious problem around
the world.
The lighting. Are you getting enough daylight? Do you have nice lamps or
is it just horrible strip lighting overhead?
Personalization. Does the space feel like your own?
Green things. Can you see plants and trees?
Posture. Does your chair support you properly? Can you reach your
keyboard without having to lean forward? Is the top of your screen at eye-
level height?
Clutter. Do you have papers scattered everywhere? Is there an old gym kit
or lunchbox festering underneath your desk?
Storage. Do you have enough and is it the right type?
Once you have done an honest assessment, think of very
small ways that you could improve the space. In an ideal
world, your office would pay for all of these improvements
and it is always worth asking if there is any budget. You
should also definitely consult your HR department or office
manager if you are experiencing aches and pains from the
way that you sit, or if you don’t get any daylight. Over the
page are some ideas for very small things you can try that
will transform your day even if there isn’t a huge budget.
Sort out the clutter. It might seem too large a task to try
to sort out absolutely everything in your office or desk
space at once. So break it down into very small steps. Once
a week, allocate a drawer that you wish to tidy for five
minutes. If there is an old file that you haven’t been through
in years, take five minutes out of your afternoon to look
through it and chuck everything you don’t need away. The
thought of having to do everything at once can feel like a
huge mountain to climb so concentrate on one very small
thing you can do.
First Kaizen step: clear out one of your office drawers and
reflect on how much more zen you feel.
Put down your phone. Could you use the time more
effectively? Does reading a book make you feel any different
when you arrive at work? Or can you spend the time
learning a new language?
Have a walk outside. Going for a walk can sound like such
rudimentary advice, but escaping your desk and getting
outside can make such a difference. Is there a local park
nearby or a canal or river that you can walk along? If you
work in a town or city centre, are there roads or areas
nearby which you are yet to explore?
First Kaizen step: for one lunchtime per week, try getting
outside for an hour.
Go and get a bit zen. The office might seem like the last
place that you should meditate, but can you find a quiet
meeting room or breakout space? Or is there a bench or
patch of grass outside that you can use? Taking some time
out to relax your body and just concentrate on your breath
can have transformative effects on how you feel for the rest
of the day.
EMAIL ETIQUETTE
First Kaizen step: try this tip with your next annoying email
and see if it has any impact upon how you feel.
For most of us, email will have been part of our job for most
of our working life, and old habits are very hard to break so
don’t try to introduce all of these techniques at once. The
most important thing is to be mindful of your attitude
towards email, notice when you are slipping into bad
behaviour, and trying your best to switch off when you can
(and/or get friends and loved ones to remind you of this).
Have breaks. Make sure that you leave your screen for at
least five minutes every hour.
ATTENTION: FREELANCERS!
For those people who don’t have an office space, then do try
to at least move out of your bedroom to work. Separating
out where you work from where you relax is crucial for
achieving good sleep and indicating to your brain that you
are now in ‘work mode’ when you set up in the morning.
Know when you work best. Some people are able to sit at
a table from 9am until 8pm and work consistently for that
amount of time until they are done. I am not one of these
people. One of the benefits of being in control of your
working time is that you can tailor it to how you work best.
Are you an early riser and more able to concentrate in the
morning? Then get up at 6am and work until lunchtime. If
you hate mornings then don’t force yourself to get up early,
but structure your day around a later finish and don’t feel
guilty about it.
Have a strict routine. While you should be flexible with
your schedule according to how you work best, it is still
imperative that you stick to as much of a routine as
possible. If you find that you are more creative in the
mornings, then allocate your creative time for then and
save the boring admin tasks for the afternoon, or vice versa.
And try to always finish at a certain time each day so that
you clearly denote which hours are your work time and
which are your leisure time. It can be so easy to let your
work bleed into your personal life, so be sure to allocate set
working hours, stick to them, and let others know of them
so that they don’t try to encroach into days or hours when
you’re not working.
You might not have a clear idea of what your dream career
is, but it could be that you have a vague sense that you are
unhappy in your current role but are not sure what you
really want to change. In this instance, it is best to take a
step back and take stock. Write down a list of positives and
negatives about your current role.
Which parts of the job do you like doing and which
parts do you hate? For example: meeting people, being
proactive, negotiating, putting together a really neat
spreadsheet, working in a team, working alone, producing
events, talking on the phone, travelling, networking,
designing things, etc.
Try out your new career for a day. Shadow somebody for
a day to learn what the nuts and bolts of the job are and see
whether you would enjoy it. It might use up one of your
holiday days from work, but it is worth it in the long run if it
means that you can learn something valuable. If you are
looking to move into the charity sector or something to do
with the arts, are there any organisations that you can
volunteer with to get some invaluable experience?
Do a little bit every day. This has been a hard lesson for
me to learn, but taking a small amount out of each day to
study is far better and less stressful than trying to cram it
all in at the very last minute. Think of inventive ways that
you can manage to do a little bit of studying each day,
perhaps even on the bus in the morning.
First Kaizen step: get all of your course mates together and
plan a super-healthy meal to eat.
As with all of the other sections in this book, the first stage
of the process is going to be about taking a step back,
analysing your current habits and thinking about your
goals. We will then go on to look at ideas for small
alterations you can make in order to change bad spending
habits. Everybody’s situation will be different, but I hope
that there will be at least one small, relevant change that
you can make which will spur you on to make other
changes. The final part will then take a more positive
attitude towards your finances and discuss ideas for ways
you can start to save money. And, obviously, the two
concepts are interlinked: if you change your bad spending
habits then you are more likely to be able to save more
money!
You will probably find that for most of the items on this list
you will have felt a sense of satisfaction from buying them
because they offered you a fun experience with your loved
ones, they were culturally enriching or they helped you to
relax. You should budget some ‘fun money’ into your
spending plan, otherwise you might abandon your spending
goals. The Kaizen approach to spending is about being
mindful of what you are spending and making the right
choices to ensure that you live within your means.
If you do feel like you are spending too much money, have a
think about whether there is any way you can reduce your
outgoings.
NON-ESSENTIALS
Think about how you feel about having spent the money:
First Kaizen step: try taking out a set amount of cash to use
for the week and only spending what you have. Notice if it feels
different to spend in this way.
First Kaizen step: attach a note to your wallet for a week and
see if it breaks the automaticity of reaching for your card and
buying something.
Use savings apps. There are now several mobile apps that
will do the saving for you automatically. They analyse the
amount you are spending each week, then transfer over a
balance that it thinks you can afford to a savings account, or
it will round up whatever you are spending to the nearest
pound/euro/dollar then transfer over the rest. You barely
notice that you are saving because the amounts are so
small, but they soon build up and you can usually transfer
the money back right away if you need to.
Have a coin jar. This may sound a bit old-school, but most
people will have some loose change hanging around their
house. If you keep it to one side and save it up you can then
take it along to the bank to be paid directly into your
account. Lots of supermarkets also have machines that will
count it for you and pay you the amount in larger
denominations for the price of a small commission.
First Kaizen step: get into the habit of emptying all of the
coins in your purse or wallet into a jar at the end of the week
and watch it build up.
Have reminders of what you are saving for. It is good to
remind yourself of whatever goal it is that you are saving
towards to keep up your motivation. Why not have a picture
of the holiday destination you want to go to as your
computer background?
The main thing that I have taken away from living in and
visiting Japanese homes is the close attention paid to how
space is used. Because it is limited, especially in cities,
every inch of the room is used, and many rooms serve as
multi-functional spaces.
TAKE STOCK
Is there clutter?
Does everything have a home?
Do you have enough storage?
Do you need everything?
How does the room make you feel? Calm/happy/stressed/anxious?
Is it clean?
Does anything need fixing?
Do you like the furnishings?
Make a list of things that could be
improved/cleaned/fixed/tidied and next to each item, write
a small thing you can do towards making that improvement.
And then note how it will make you feel to make that
change.
FOR EXAMPLE
TIDYING TECHNIQUES
Take stock of what you own, what matters to you and what
you regularly use. The idea isn’t to throw away absolutely
all of your possessions and live like a Buddhist monk (unless
you wish to). The aim is to have a designated space for
everything rather than having random drawers or
cupboards overloaded with stuff that you’re keeping ‘for a
rainy day’ but will never actually use.
CLOTHES
First Kaizen step: sort through your sock drawer and throw
out any socks that aren’t in a pair.
Sell, sell, sell! The great thing about books and music is
that they often have resale value. There are now online
companies that will take a job lot of items and give you a
price for them (often calculated by scanning the barcodes
with your phone). I did this with my books before I went to
Japan and made over £100.
PAPERS
Sort out everything else. Do you really need your old gas
bill from 2009? Take all of your other paperwork and sort it
into date order. You rarely need to keep copies of any bills
older than six months, and most can be downloaded now
anyway. Similarly, do you really need the instruction manual
for your phone or your oven? Nearly every manual can be
found online these days too, and all of the information can
be searched. Throw away or shred.
First Kaizen step: each month, set a reminder and spend five
minutes sorting out the bills and paperwork at the older end of
the date spectrum.
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS
SENTIMENTAL ITEMS
Items with sentimental value can often be the toughest to
sort through. These can be anything from photos,
ornaments and trinkets to jewellery that you have inherited,
crockery, clothes, holiday souvenirs, old children’s books or
toys and pieces of furniture. The point isn’t to get rid of
everything that you feel attached to, but to decide,
rationally, if you really need or want them. The following
prompts can help:
DO A RELATIONSHIP INVENTORY
As with all things Kaizen, the first step is to take stock and
ask yourself some probing questions about your
relationships. Take a piece of paper and divide it into
sections, such as family, romantic relationships, friendships,
colleagues, etc. For each section, write down the most
important people in each category. Rather than feeling like
you have to tackle absolutely every relationship in your life
at once, initially choose just one or two people who you
would like to focus on. This could be because they are the
most important person to you, or a person you feel you are
drifting away from, or somebody who is going through a
tough time. Keep the following questions in the forefront of
your mind.
What are the main emotions that the thought of this person
evokes? (Happiness, sadness, anxiety, joyfulness,
competitiveness, equality, hate, love, hilarity, draining,
boosting, burdensome, trusting. . .)
Does this person make an equal effort with me?
How has our relationship evolved over time and what has
changed (either for the better or worse)?
IMPROVING RELATIONSHIPS
Talk! If you are agonizing over the direction that a
relationship is taking, it may be that a friend or partner has
no idea that you are feeling a little neglected by them or
you are sad that you have drifted apart. Or it may be that
they have been feeling the same and haven’t known how to
broach it. Being brave and letting them know how you feel
can be transformative. If you feel incapable of doing this
face to face, then a wisely worded text or email can do
wonders. Conversely, if they react badly or don’t seem to
care for your feelings, then it is a clear sign that you should
extricate yourself from the relationship.
Practise gratitude. Keeping a gratitude journal or diary
can remind you to take stock and appreciate those around
you. At the end of each day, write down the name of a
person who has made you happy and why. Look back on this
regularly and appreciate the relationships that you have.
First Kaizen step: try choosing one person each week to send
a note to – whether that is via text, postcard or email – and tell
them why they make you happy, give them a compliment, or tell
them that you are thinking of them.
If so, is there something that you could have done differently? (Try to
be as objective as possible here!)
If you’re not sure what has gone wrong, what is the best way to find
out? Would that person respond to you asking them directly, either in
person or in writing? Or would it be better to get help from a mutual
friend or relation?
Once you have thought through some of the causes for your
relationship breakdown, think of how best to go about
building bridges. This will very much depend on the nature
of your relationship and what has gone wrong, but
remember to be mindful of the following:
One kind word can warm three winter months – Japanese proverb
PRACTISING SELF-LOVE
First Kaizen step: write down five things that you loved to do
as a child and see if any might be worth picking up again.
Can you make it? Think about items that you regularly
buy that you could make instead. Rather than spending lots
of money on a new armchair, can you learn how to
reupholster your existing chair? Can you make your own
candles or knit your friend a scarf for his birthday rather
than buy a new one?
First Kaizen step: write down one hobby that you could start
for each season of the year.
NEW CHALLENGES
I decided to learn Japanese and then move to Tokyo
because I felt in need of a challenge and that my life could
benefit from a shake-up. And being in Japan spurred me on
to write this book, something that I would never have
thought to do or committed the time to do beforehand. Your
new challenges don’t have to be quite as drastic as mine
though, don’t worry! Getting out of your comfort zone and
testing yourself, whether that is becoming a master of
sudoku puzzles or finally perfecting your illustration skills,
can boost self-esteem, get you out of a rut, and give you
new skills to employ in other areas of your life, such as your
career. For anybody who really doesn’t have any idea of
what activity they would like to take up, here are some
ideas for things you can try and small Kaizen-method-
approved challenges to get started.
Learn a new word every day. The OED and various other
online services will email you a word and its etymology each
day. Or seek one out yourself by looking in the dictionary.
First Kaizen step: Start keeping a log of all of the new words
that you discover – the more obscure, the better.
Improve your handwriting. If, like me, you feel like your
handwriting has turned into a spidery mess now that you
mostly use a computer to write, try out some calligraphy
activities or take a course. My friend did a course before
her wedding and saved a fortune on invitations and place
cards, as she made her own with her beautiful handwriting.
Start a blog. There are now tonnes of online sites that will
help you to put together a blog page for free. You can
dedicate it to one of your passions or use it for a brain
dump. Try to write an entry every day, even if it is just
something very short. It can be for your personal
consumption or a way to connect with friends or people
who have similar interests. My boyfriend wrote a blog while
we were in Japan and it was a great way of keeping in touch
with people at home, updating them on what we had been
up to, and keeping a catalogue of our many memories.
First Kaizen step: find a new book and try to read it within a
fortnight.
Improve your general knowledge. It could be that you
want to do better on the pub quiz machine or complete
crosswords faster. Or that you feel like your knowledge of
Manchester United’s 1992 squad is lacking or that you wish
you knew more about the French Revolution. Try choosing
one topic a week to learn about and then read some online
articles, listen to TEDx talks or podcasts, or open a good
old-fashioned book about it. Over the course of the day,
make a note of any other topics you come across that you
would like to know some more about, whether that’s
something you read online, in a newspaper or something
you heard about at work.
SOUNDS
Educate yourself about a new musical genre. Have you
always wished that you knew more about classical music?
Or the history of rock ’n’ roll? There are infinite online
resources for learning about music, whether that is falling
down a YouTube hole of watching lots of music videos, or
seeking out documentaries. I always feel ashamed that I
don’t know enough about classical music so have started to
listen to classical-music radio stations when I have a task to
complete at work and need music to help me concentrate
and block out the rest of the office.
First Kaizen step: pick one artist and look up one of their
paintings every day for a week. Or read something about an art
movement for five minutes each day.
FOOD
Learn to make your favourite takeaway meal from
scratch. If you aren’t a very confident cook or are looking
to save some money, challenge yourself to make your
favourite dish from scratch. Teaching yourself some basic
skills and favourite flavour combinations can revolutionize
your attitude to cooking. There are lots of resources to help,
either online or in cookery books, and you could enlist the
assistance of your partner/friends/family too.
Try out a cookery technique you have never tried
before. If you are already a capable cook, think of a recipe
or cookery technique that you have never made before and
try it out, whether that is making a soufflé that doesn’t
immediately sink or the perfect pad thai.
THE OUTDOORS
Get to know the history of the area in which you live.
Do you live in a town or city but have little knowledge of the
local history? Do you know the story behind the old factory
building that has now been turned into luxury flats? Have
you noticed any unusual architecture? When I visit a new
place, I love exploring on foot and finding out about the
history around me, but I rarely do so when I’m home and in
the places where I spend most of my time. Local libraries
can be a great source of information on the history of your
area, or see if there are any walking tours available. And if
you are in a city with lots of tall buildings, remember to look
up – you often see a whole other side to a place above
ground.
First Kaizen step: if you have a bike, then try cycling just a bit
further away from your usual route and exploring a new place.
Or catch local transport to a station or stop which you have
never been to before. You might be pleasantly surprised by
what you find.
ISBN 978-1-5290-0536-3
The right of Sarah Harvey to be identified as the author of this work has been
asserted by her in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act
1988.
Pan Macmillan does not have any control over, or any responsibility for, any
author or third-party websites referred to in or on this book.
You may not copy, store, distribute, transmit, reproduce or otherwise make
available this publication (or any part of it) in any form, or by any means
(electronic, digital, optical, mechanical, photocopying, recording or
otherwise), without the prior written permission of the publisher. Any person
who does any unauthorized act in relation to this publication may be liable to
criminal prosecution and civil claims for damages.
A CIP catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.
Visit www.panmacmillan.com to read more about all our books and to buy
them. You will also find features, author interviews and news of any author
events, and you can sign up for e-newsletters so that you’re always first to
hear about our new releases.