MODULE 1

FORMING THE HEART AND MIND OF GMRC TEACHER GOOD MANNERS ANG RIGHT CONDUCT
LESSON 1
HOW I VIEW MYSELF
You are about to take a journey, and like a good traveler, you prepare the things that you need to
successfully reach your destination.
This journey will lead you towards self-discovery, understanding, acceptance, and fulfillment.
The best way to start is to know what you have, where you are now, how far have you gone, how far still
would you want to go, and most importantly, what you need to get there.

INTRODUCTION
"An unexamined life is not worth luing"
(Socrates)
You are about to start your journey and your first stop is taking a closer look at yourself. You will be
making an inventory of your strengths and limitations and since becoming yourself is not a process that
you do alone so you will compare your self-assessment with a friend.
Acceptance and appreciation of your self-discoveries will lead you and bring you closer to your goal.
Now, let your journey begin.

ABSTRACTION
At this point, how do you see yourself as a person? After taking a closer look at your traits and
characteristics you are now aware of what you have and what you can do and use them to reach your
goal. Your description of yourself tells you how you perceive yourself as a person. The way you perceive
yourself affects how you feel about yourself and these are manifested in your behavior. If you attribute
positive traits to yourself, you will feel good and will also behave in pleasant ways. In my case, if I believe
I am a lovable person, I would feel good and happy about myself, then I will be more open and free to
relate with others thinking that they would love what I do. But, if I think I am not lovable, I would feel
insecure and refrain from associating with others because I believe I am not lovable and nobody wants
to be with me.
In reality, we all perceive ourselves positively or negatively at one time or another and sometimes there
is a greater tendency for some of us to have negative perceptions of self especially those who have self-
esteem issues. Sadly, it colors our outlook in life which in turn manifests in our relationships with others.
What is important is that we don't dwell on it but we move forward, maximize our potentials, grow as a
person and also contribute to enriching the lives of others.
Now, who do you want to be? According to Leo Buscaglia, "We have the right to be ourselves and all we
can do is claim that right." This sounds

exciting and we all would just love to claim that right. However, you may have some tendencies to
succumb to society's standards of what is good and appropriate and many times you find yourself short
of these norms making you feel inadequate or uncertain about yourself. The challenge to you is to
acknowledge your real self, the unique self that is not identical anyone in this world. The self whose
characteristics are organized in a distinct way that marks you as different from all others around you.
You may have limitations but as the famous Helen Keller once said: "I learned that it is possible for us to
create light and sound and order within us no matter what calamity may befall us in the outer world."
Take note, God can't be wrong in sending you into this world to fulfill His purpose. Thus, knowing your
positive qualities and using them, to the fullest for the enrichment of yourself, of others and His
kingdom is the true essence of becoming the person that is You.
THE VISION THERAPY OF JOHN POWELL
There are four techniques to correct our distorted visions whether about ourselves or other things. You
can challenge yourself to adopt these techniques and get a renewed vision of yourself.
A. COUNTERING
It is a statement of truth we tell ourselves to replace the error in our false thinking and distorted
attitudes.
'Example:
Distorted statement about the self: "I have to be available to everybody who asks for my help otherwise
I am unfair."
Countering statement: "I am very willing to help, but I just don't have the time."

B. MODELING
It is imitating a person who acts the way we want to act. We think, identify with, and act like that
person. I remember how my teacher refused a request in a nice way.
Example:
My favorite teacher would usually say "I would be very happy to do it, but my schedule has been filled
up since last week." Or: "I hope it's not urgent, but I can be available.

C. STRETCHING
It is risking beyond our comfort zones to try new and more satisfying ways of doing things. Caution must
also be made that stretching should be done in a gradual manner. If it's about refusing something, start
refusing somebody who is requesting for the first time or somebody who is not yet very close to you.
Then do it with friends until you get the art of doing it graciously. The risk of doing it abruptly is you
might get overwhelmed, or experience rejection resulting in a strained relationship. Think of a situation
that applies best to you and try this technique.
D. PRAYING
It is reflecting or meditating as to how God is communicating with you in a particular event of your life.
For example, instead of becoming defensive about negative feedback, you can pray for the gift of
openness and humility to accept, learn, and grow from it.

LESSON 2:
MY VALUES, MY GUIDE
INTRODUCTION
By this time you have a pretty good idea of who you are as a person.
Now you can describe yourself accurately since with the help of a friend you are aware of your good
qualities as well as the not so good.
You have also learned to accept the things you like and the things you don't really like about yourself
with the desire and determination to improve.
With a clear picture of who you are, you are now ready to continue your journey through life.
But wait, you need something more, the one that would give you directions - our values - they are like
street signs that would lead you to the right path that would bring you closer to your destination.

Abstraction

Multiple Definitions of Values

When an ordinary person who is preoccupied with earning a living is asked to define value, the first
thing that may come to his mind is the value of a peso compared to a dollar, euro, etc. For psychologists,
it is that which makes something desirable, attractive, worthy of approval, admiration; that which
inspires feelings, judgments, or attitudes of esteem, commendation; that which is useful in. view of
certain ends (Esteban, 1990). Values motivate, inspire, or lead you to choose and reach your goals in life.
On the other hand, the sociologists view. valuesas goals of personal behavior during social interactions.
They are those that are considered important for the welfare of the members of a group. They are
common to all of them and represent their concept of what is good and desirable for everyone. They are
also what people see, hear, perceive, and appreciate. In a society there exists a value system, a
configuration of cultural practices, the dominant motivations and basic principles of their behavior;
cultural ethics that binds them together, their concept of what is important and the desired reactions
and responses to situations.
Values are transcendent beliefs and moral precepts one learns from teachers of religion while for
parents they are the ideals or virtues which they try to inculcate to their children.
Professional educators view values as totality of objective, universal truths and standards that should
govern man's decisions, motivations, conduct, and aspirations. Each of these definitions has contributed
to our better understanding of values but the simplest, most basic definition of values is: Moral values
are universal truths which man holds to be good and important; they are the ethical principles which he
struggles to attain and implement in his daily life. They are the ideals which transcend all time and
space; those which are valid for all men regardless of race or religion; the ones which unite strangers,
families, nations - all of humanity - with God (Esteban, 1990).
Two Kinds of Values
1. Absolute Moral Values = absolute
because no human being is exempted, every human being is called to uphold and live by them during his
lifetime. Examples are love, respect for the dignity of man, love of truth, justice, peace, respect for
property, family solidarity, respect for life, freedom, work.
They are universal because they are common to all people and are based on human nature which is
universal.
2. Cultural Behavioral
Values
Behavioral values are the inner personal responses or incentives which prompt a person to act in a
certain way. Cultural values are the modes of conduct of a group or society. Behavioral and cultural
values are changeable and internal; they emerge from within man, individually or collectively, and lead
to the fulfillment of more immediate goals. They are each man's views, attitudes, or inclinations which
are prompted by inner senses, emotions, thoughts, motives, experience, and training. They are customs
and traditions which are expressed and transmitted in interpersonal relationships.
For example, in
western culture people value open, frank, and clear interpersonal relationships while Asians conduct
themselves in ways which they perceive will preserve harmonious relationships and self-esteem. Hiya,
pakikisama, utang na loob are examples of Filipino cultural values.

Value of a Teacher

Teaching is one of the most important jobs in

our society,as educators play a crucial role in helping to influence learners and shape their lives. As
such, teachers who comm themselves to teach often hold specife values that motivate and drive them
to dedicate their lives to others. Teachers have a special responsibility to foster values.

Their purpose is to help to clarify the meaning of values and ensure that all learners understand and
share the same principle. To promote and implement these values requires an understanding that they
are mirrored in each of the teacher's actions and decisions. Values are taught when teachers foster them
in daily life. For example every day they treat learners with dignity, they, in turn, will understand the
meaning of that value.
The Core Filipino Values
1. MAKA - DIYOS
Expresses one's spiritual beliefs while respecting the spiritual beliefs
Maka-divos
of others. This
is manifested by engaging oneself in worthwhile spiritual activities, respecting sacred places, respecting
the religious beliefs of others, and demonstrating curiosity and willingness to learn about other ways to
express spiritual life.
2. MAKA - TAO
Is being sensitive to individual, social, and cultural differences.
Maka-tao
This can be observed when one shows respect for all, waits for one's turn, takes good care of borrowed
things, views mistakes as learning opportunities upholds and respects the dignity and equality of all
including those with special needs, volunteers to assist others in times of need, recognizes and respects
people from different economic, social, and cultural backgrounds, cooperates during activities,
recognizes and accepts the contribution of others toward a goal, considers diverse views, communicates
respectfully, accepts defeat and celebrates others' success, enables others to succeed, speaks out
against and prevents bullying.

3. MAKA -KALIKASAN
Caring for the environment and utilizing resources wisely, judiciously, and economically. This is practiced
by showing a caring attitude toward the environment, practicing waste management, conserving energy
and resources, taking care of school materials, facilities, and equipment, keeping the work area in order
during and after work, and keeping one's work neat and orderly.
4. MAKA - BANSA
Demonstrates pride in being a Filipino; exercises the rights and responsibilities of a Filipino citizen. This
is illustrated as one identifies himself as a Filipino.
Respects the flag and national anthem, takes pride in diverse Filipino cultural expressions, practices, and
traditions, promotes the appreciation and enhancement of Filipino languages, abides by the rules of the
school, community, and country and enables others to develop interest and pride in being a Filipino.

LESSON 3
ME, MY FAMILY AND THE SOCIAL INSTITUTION

INTRODUCTION
After exploring your values and their importance in guiding you towards the right path, you will now
continue to discover more" about yourself and this time you will look into your family and the other
institutions that have contributed to your becoming into the person that you are now. It is through
knowing your roots and striving to be your best that you can become an instrument to help others
become the person that they want to be.

ABSTRACTION
The Family as the Natural Institution
A family is usually made up of a husband, a wife, and children. Nature intended it this way because
when a child is born, it takes many years under the guidance of parents before he can get along by
himself. The most natural thing for the parents to do is to take care of their children with an abundance
of. love and affection.
Nature also intended men to feel closely united as
a family because parents naturally want to see themselves in their children. You are conceived as the
fruit of your parents' love, and for this reason, father and mother exceed themselves in caring for you.
They sacrifice and give up many things which they could enjoy, their time, money, effort, so they can
take better care of you. They work hard, get tired, plan and save so that you can get a better education
or better health care. No one tells them to do it. They do it naturally, out of love for you who are part of
their flesh and blood. So as their children you always have to be grateful to your parents.

The family is the primary and natural school of life (Esteban, 1990).
It is in the family where you learn to practice patience and forgiveness. It is there that the true meaning
of authority and trust is learned. It is there that you learn to serve and give of yourself, to help and to
participate, to listen to others and to appreciate the worth of sacrifice. Brotherhood among men will be
possible only if it exists among brothers and sisters in the family. Faith among men will be possible only
if husbands and wives are faithful to one another. Understanding among men will be possible only if
parents and children understand one another. It is also in the family that a man learns the art of giving
and sharing, of appreciation and dignity, of respect and affection. Every mother and father work hard to
give their children the opportunities to grow and mature into capable and lovable members of society.
Through procreation and education, the family contributes to the development of society.
A society can change for the better only if the members who all belong to a specific family do and
become what they should be as a brother, sister, mother, father, daughter, or son.
If the good of the family is fostered, promoted and protected by society, the individuals are in a position
to grow up to their fulfillment in the best possible environment, conducive to the development of the
social virtues of a good citizen. The effectiveness of all other educational agencies depends on this
primary and natural school for life.

The School
In school, the professional educator is challenged to help prepare the student for life; to give him ideals;
to offer him an "objective measuring rod" or set of criteria upon which to base his thoughts, words,
deeds; to instruct him in an objective standard of morality which must be upheld and defended under all
circumstances. It is said that education is a lifelong process, schooling is the process of being taught in a
school. It forms the habit of learning and provides the means for continuing to learn after all schooling is
completed. Schooling is an adventure into a larger and more complex environment outside of the home
The informal routines, limitations and parental authority in family life are now replaced by formal time
schedules, rules of conduct and obedience to arbitrary or less personal figures.
You learn that laws and limitations are imposed to establish order in a community and to ensure justice.
Schooling is also a social encounter with peers, with other youngsters of different ages, temperaments
and abilities, and with adults and authority figures other than familiar family members. It is an
opportunity to share and exchange, to give and receive.
Schooling is likewise a testing ground in which you are exposed to ideas and conduct which may agree
or conflict with your own moral values and ethical behavior. These are instances where you might be
required to. prove or validate your beliefs. Finally, schooling is an experience which should be associated
with the joy of learning; it should be recalled as natural, wholesome, and "necessary part" in the
educational process. You bring into adult life thoughts, attitudes, habits and values which were formed
during this
"preparatory stage" and which continue to shape your character and Influence learning.
As future GMRC educator, it is best to bear in mind that the best way to inspire the learner is to let them
see the example of a respected teacher.
You should never underestimate how the student scrutinizes your lessons, teaching style, mannerisms,
moods, virtues and personality. The student observes, absorbs impressions, talks about, and remembers
his teachers.
Religion
The teachings of religion speak of man's destiny and the transcendence of man, of the fall of man and of
his redemption, of sin and the forgiveness of sins; of Grace- a supernatural gift of God which enlightens,
strengthens, and brings man to his salvation, i.e., man's participation in the divine life of God. The
teachings likewise attach worth and nobility to pain and sacrifice; they suggest how to face trials and
sufferings with dignity and optimism; they account for mysteries and miracles, good and evil; they
demand the practice of virtues. In sum, they give meaning, purpose and direction to life. Everyone
naturally responds to enchings of religion, to TRUTH, and to the UNIVERSAL TRUTHS of lov, respest for
the dignity of man, Justed, peace, famlly solldarty. with Innocence, Implicity, and realism because we Ar
learn religion through the senses, throup what we see and heat. We accept and trust what is taught to
us especially if the teachers of religion embody the truths and are trustworthy.
The teachers of religion instruct in their lessons and homilies through their example and the advice that
they give. as they console and when they guide in periods of conflict and suffering. They serve as a noble
and powerful force in the education of moral values when they bring the intellect in contact with Truth,
inspire the will to do Good and bear what must be borne for the love of God and neighbor.

Peers
Most of the learner's waking hours are mostly spent at home and in school where parental and teacher
modelling influences his behavior. Not to be overlooked however is his peers who may exert
considerable influence on the child. He is sensitive to peer influence and pressure because at this stage
of emotional and social development he feels a strong need for acceptance most especially among his
age mates. He wants to join in group activities, to be invited, to feel wanted, to identify with his peers
and to belong. In this way he gains self-confidence and self-worth.
"Show me who your friends are, and I will tell you' what you' are." Choice of friends does reflect an
individual's values and in the crucial teen years, peers do teach each other. More often than not, peers
influence each other, positively; they may even have clearer and stronger convictions than adult role
models; or they may be more effective in advising each other to abide by moral principles than parents
and teachers. who have relinquished their ethical standards for less noble ideals. On the other hand,
they may exert such strong pressure on a peer to join illicit conduct, that even a confident and morally
upright child may find it hard to
resist.

Mass Media

According to Kid's Health, children and teenagers spend four or more hours a day watching television.
That's about 28 or more hours a week. Today, media has come to be a big part in our society and it
seems television shows and movies have become more violent and racy.

The problem is not television in general but how much time and what kids are watching. Children and
teenagers need to limit how much television they watch and media needs to enforce who can and
cannot watch their entertainment.

According to American Academy of Children & Adolescent Psychiatry study, children will see over
200,000 violent acts before they are 18. Specifically, children programming displays about 20 violent
acts every hour. These studies have shown behavioral problems among young kids have increased over
the years because of watching violent television. Some children will imitate the acts they see and use
them against other kids. University of Maine study shows watching too much television can lead to
childhood obesity. Obesity in America have been increasing especially in young children and television is
a major factor. Since kids are spending their time watching television they are not getting physical
activity. In another study (Zafar et al, 2003) it was found out that media can influence social components
of human personality. It focuses on how human feelings and emotions can be altered or changed. Mass
media especially the electronic media and internet are making young people aggressive and
materialistic, promote fashion phobia and vulgarity. On the other hand, it demonstrated that media
increased awareness about political, social, and environmental issues. It also contributed to the
promotion of business and improving standards of living.

MODULE 2
THE GMRC TEACHER REACHING OUT TO OTHERS
LESSON 1
MAKING MEANINGFUL CONNECTIONS

The lesson Making Meaningful

Connections highlights the beauty of diversity and how people despite the differences of each one can
transcend such to be able to establish meaningful relationships. This will enable the pre-service teacher
to broaden their perspective of diversity and be open to embrace such inside and outside of the
classroom.

Imagine a classroom of 30 to_40 learners or even more. What do vou see?

What have you observed? Perhaps you see a roomful of learners who behave differently, varying in
sizes, color and ability and are unique in their own respective ways. They come from different
familieswith distinct packaging.
They bring their personal history to the classroom and each one is different.
This is what the principle of individual variation is all about. No two persons are exactly alike. Each
person is unique. All people are genetically and biologically different from each other.
Even identical twins will have their unique features. In as much as people differ from each other, no two
people can be expected to react in a similar way to the same environmental stimuli.
Diversity is everything
that
makes people different from each other (Kampen, 2019). This includes many different factors: race,
ethnicity, gender, ability, sexual orientation, handicapping conditions, socio-economic status, age,
religious belief, or political conviction.
Other demographic factors such as family lifestyles, personality characteristics, and family composition
may also be considered.
The University of Rhode
Island defines diversity in the classroom as "understanding that each student brings unique experiences,
strengths, and ideas to our classroom. Diversity is the exploration and incorporation of these differences
to enrich learning in our classroom."All these factors work together to inform how everyone encounters
the world.
Understanding, accepting and valuing diverse backgrounds can help our learners thrive and survive in
this ever-changing world. There are different types of diversity which include:
1. Diversity in terms of personal characteristics.'
These cover age,
gender, communication socio-economic
style,
background and
personality.
2. Diversity in terms of student background. These have to do with culture, ethnicity, language, political
beliefs, social class and religion.
3. Diversity in terms of cognitive aptitude to cover cognitive
abilities, technical abilities and skills as well as social abilities and skills.
4. Diversity in terms of level of motivation and diversity of opinion.
Nowadays, teachers are faced with a classroom that is a melting pot of learners with a variety of
biological, social and cultural backgrounds.
They bring diverse characteristics into the classroom regardless of grade or subject they may be
attending. Given the diversity of today's society, the ability to connect with peers, classmates, co-
workers is invaluable or indispensable.
The concept of diversity is oftentimes associated with inclusion.
The concept of inclusion goes beyond diversity because simply having different kinds of learners in the
classroom does not necessarily mean the exercise of inclusion. It is when people coming from different
demographics feel welcomed
can we say that the classroom is inclusive. ' Inclusion refers to a cultural and environmental feeling of
belonging. Thus, if a child with hearing impairment feels comfortable inside the classroom because the
teacher and classmates are accepting, then we can say that inclusion is practiced. An inclusive classroom
makes the learners feel valued, respected, accepted, and encouraged to fully participate in the class
activities. Teachers who recognize
and
embrace diversity should endeavor to make the classroom inclusive.
Teachers have the responsibility to make sure that learners can learn and study in a diverse
environment and collaborate with each other. This implies the creation of a classroom community which
is supportive making the children ready to learn with the prevailing sense of security, support,
happiness, excitement, curiosity and interest. The school curriculum ought to teach learners how to live
and work in a society where every individual's uniqueness is respected and appreciated.
Diversity improves critical thinking skills, builds empathy and encourages students to think differently.
If a teacher recognizes diversity in the classroom this will enable him or her to plan for teaching
methodologies to maximize learning.
This can also help the teacher communicate his awareness and appreciation of each one in the
classroom. It also makes the teacher conscious of the language being used, the points to be emphasized
and the manner of interaction with them.
Pre-service and even in-service teachers ought to be aware of certain assumptions that might get in the
way of building inclusive classrooms and meeting students' learning needs. They should avoid getting
being trapped by these assumptions. There is a need to be aware of these faulty assumptions which are:
Students are not diverse. Learners may share similarities but this doesn't mean that they are alike in all
respecks. Many factors contribute to a diverse identity and these characteristics influence how learners
behave and interact with each
other.
. Diversity doesn't
matter
because
everyone is diverse. This assumption surfaces when diversity discussions stop at the idea that everyone
is different.
. Diversity does not have anything to do with leaming. Diversity is in
action inside the classroom.
The
lesson content, the examples being given and how the teacher relates with the learners are situations
where diversity is apparent. By enabling the learners to take multiple perspectives, they develop critical
thinking and problem-solving skills. (retrieved from University Center for the Advancement of Teaching,
Ohio State University,
https://www.osu.edu/
The teacher's openness to classroom diversity leads to positive outcomes. First, t builds better thinkers.
Learners who are in a diverse classroom are better able o appreciate different perspectives and draw
stronger conclusions. The challenge o consider different perspectives enable hem to develop social skills
useful for he rest of their life. Second, appreciating diversity improves academic outcomes Children in a
diverse classroom do not only learn social skills. They also learn to become critical thinkers that
encourages academic confidence. Third, it involves
Given that accepting diversity leads to positive outcomes,; teachers can utilize these tips or ways to
promote equity and diversity in the classroom:
• Self-Awareness.
The most basic step in promoting equity and diversity is for the teacher to develop self-awareness.
There is a need for the teacher to recognize how the differences in ability, race, ethnicity, gender,
religion, personality,
SOCIO-
economic status, and being able-bodied impact one's perceptions. The teacher ought to acknowledge
one's biases and seek to understand people with different experiences.
• Get to know your learners.
All the learners in your school are unique individuals, so use that fact to build a diverse and inclusive
school culture. Take the time to learn about them. When you know your learners in terms of their
strengths and weaknesses, you will be better equipped to address their diversity
• Class Norms.
Classroom norms that promote openness are set. These include being respectful to each other, being
able to share ideas, opinions and values openly and learning to disagree respectfully. It is important that
rules are set explicitly in terms of showing respect, sharing opinions and ideas, etc. This should be a
collaborative task between teacher and learners. Flexibility should be exercised to refine the rules or
norms, if needed.

• Culturally Relevant Teaching.

Teachers are encouraged to recognize diversity by promoting the importance of cultural awareness,
creating a sense of belongingness among learners and allowing them to celebrate differences in
traditions, practices, and beliefs.
This pedagogy provides a framework which exposes the learners to cultural Variances in deep,
meaningful ways and at the same time prioritizes academic excellence for all students
• Purposeful Planning.
One important key to promoting equity and diversity is purposeful and careful planning. If a particular
topic or idea for discussion is sensitive, it would be good to select the proper text or material to be used,
the ways of facilitating the discussion which would encourage active /listening and respecting of
opinions. Collaborative learning groups can be formed to enable learners to work together.
• Meet diverse learnino needs.
The teacher can use different teaching strategies to address the different needs of the learners. The
teacher should make sure that all learners are actively participating in the classroom activities and
discussion. Technology can also be used to support especially for learners with special needs.
• Community Involvement.
Parents, family members, community members or those representing persons with special needs can be
invited as resource persons in class. The exposure of the learners to different kinds of people will
broaden their experiences and will prepare them for life beyond the class-room. It is best to be able to
connect with parents and the community. more students. Learners in a diverse classroom where
acceptance prevails are more likely to feel safer, less lonely and less bullied in school.
It is imperative that the acknowledgment of one's diversity begins with the teacher. Once the teacher
acknowledges one's diversity it will be easy to acknowledge the learners' diversity, too. Children can also
be introduced to appreciating diversity at a young age. Tominey & 0'Byron (2017) outlined a number of
simple strategies which can be tried out by a teacher in the early childhood and elementary levels. These
include helping children learn one another's names as well as the names of the teachers in school,
providing children with the opportunity to get to know each other and discover similarities and
differences, and choosing classroom themes that highlight similarities and differences within the
classroom. In addition, teachers can give children the chance to share to class what makes them special
as a means of building personal identity and boosting self-esteem. They can also be taught to engage in
open conversations about stereotypes and biases such as those pertaining to skin color, of being male or
female, of having special needs with the intention of helping them adopt less biased viewpoints.
One very interesting activity can be introduced using crayons. The children will be instructed to draw
something and color it using only ONE color. They will not be allowed to use different colors. After this,
they will asked to make a second drawing and would have the freedom to burst it with varying colors.
They will later be asked what drawing do they like and why. Chances are they would like the second
drawing because it is colorful. This can be a take off point to discuss diversity inside the
classroom.
As the teacher holds the key to celebrating diversity in the classroom, s/he must convey a positive
perspective toward the presence of diversity in the class. Diversity is a strength which every teacher can
harness to ensure that the learners will find the relationships. classroom a secure and happy place for
learning as well as develop positive social relationship

LESSON 2
VALUING AND APPRECIATING THE UNIQUENESS OF OTHERS

INTRODUCTION
It is often said that the young people are the hope and future of the fatherland. But we can change our
perspective to say that they are more than our future because they are our NOW. One of the social
contexts of children which
can train them to
become the now of society is the school.
The school with positive adult models works in a collaborative manner with other social agents to
develop the learner holistically as envisioned by the Philippine K-12 curriculum.
Part of school learning is learning how to get along with different kinds of classmates and others as well.
the teacher, whether teaching GMRC or other subjects, has a major role to play as children observe and
internalize What they see in the teacher. S/he has to be a role model in her/his intra-and inter-personal
relationships. S/he walks what s/he talks in terms of the manners, virtues and values demonstrated.
Children are very observant and notice not only differences but more so how adults respond to and
value these differences. It 15 in this respect that the teacher should instill an appreciation for diversity
from the start.

ABSTRACTION
The home was our first classroom with our parents as our first teachers. As young children, we observed
our parents and they became our role models. We observed,, absorbed, internalized and imitated their
manners, values, habits, and practices, among others. there were good ones and not so good ones. As
we grew older, our social horizons expanded to include the school where we met teachers, peers, school
heads, community members and other parents.
The various social institutions galvanized our internalization of the values of respect, courtesy and
polteness, tolerance, fairness and self-control. Our good manners are a reflection
of the values that we uphold and we owe it to ourselves as teachers and pre-service teachers to be
exemplar role models whom learners under our care will imitate. Let us now take a look at the different
values which we aspire our Generatin Alpha to. internalize.

A. Respect
The word respect is from the
Latin word respectus which means attention, regard or consideration. It can be defined as esteem for or
a sense of the worth or excellence of a person, a personal quality or ability, or something considered as
a manifestation of a personal quality or ability.
According to psychologists, respect is a basic moral value or need that makes us aware that we are
human beings and is related to productivity, happiness and success. It is like a glue that holds
relationships together. In the Philippine context, respect is paggalang as shown in our pakikipagkapwa-
tao, a shared sense of identity and consciousness of the 'other'. It means treating people with respect
and dignity as an equal, not someone below the individual.
Respect is very important for both personal identity and interpersonal relationships. To feel respected is
a basic human right. If you respect others, you care about their rights. Receiving respect from others
makes us feel safe to express ourselves. Disrespect can lead to break-ups and even violence.
It. is a concept that has to do with the ability to value and honor another person, both his or her words
and actions, even if we do not approve or share everything the person does. It is accepting the other
person and not trying to impose or change him or her.
Respecting another person means that we are non-judgmental of other people's attitudes, behaviors or
thoughts.
Our differences are valuable because we are able to create an identity. This implies that individual
differences exist and to accept the fact that as members of society we are equal.

All people are entitled to respect for the simple fact of being people. Equality; in balance. It is for this
very reason the we need to teach children from an ear, age the value of respect and the bey way to
teach them respect is by being, role model to them.
Respect for others is
ver,
important but more for the self since you will value others to the extent tha you are able to value
yourself.
Why is respect
important!
Visualize a home or a classroom withou respect. What do you see? Chaos Conflicts? Indeed, its absence
leads to conflict and dissatisfaction in our interpersonal relationships. If we don' respect others, we
don't get respected in return; if we don't respect ourselves we will not be respected by others, too.
It is essential to feel safe and to be able to express our ideas without fear of judgment, humiliation or
discrimination
Being respectful of others, being
respected and respecting ourselves contribute to our sense of well-being, mental health, self-esteem
and self-efficacy.

Respect comes in different types. They are:

A. Respect for self

This is the ability to respect the self, to value and appreciate oneself
This is accepting
the self regardless of what others think.
B. Respect for others
This refers to the act of tolerating, accepting and considering another person inspite of individual
differences.
Examples are respect for
parents, men and women equally, teachers, older persons, religious beliefs, for people with varying
sexual orientation (LGBTI, etc.
C. Respect for social norms
This is the ability to respect all norms that govern society. Some examples include respect for courtesy
rules inside the classroom, traffic rules or health protocols during the COVID 19 pandemic.
D. Respect for nature
This covers appreciation of the environment.
Examples include knowing how to dispose of our garbage properly, not wasting water or recycling, etc.

E. Respect for family

This implies being able to understand and respect each other within the family, and thus being able to
live in harmony with each other.
F. Respect for Values
This refers to the ability to honor our own principles. An example of this is respect for life.
G. Respect for Culture
This refers to the ability to recognize that there are other beliefs and be able to
respect them. This can be seen in our being able to accept varying religious beliefs.
H. Respect for national symbols
This refers to the ability to value and appreciate the symbols of a nation
Do we give respect to the Philippine flag as we sing the National Anthem?
I. Respect for human beings
This refers to the ability to comply with legal norms, respect laws, church dogmas and beliefs.
How can we tell that respect is present in our relationships? Think of the many situations where we
need to get along with others.
Check it out if the following indicators of respect are present:
• You feel safe being around each other.
• You know it's okay for you and others to express who you are.
• When you disagree you listen to each other and demonstrate patience.
. You don't yell or talk over the top
of each other.
• You are not controlling other person's choices.
• You can talk openly about your needs and wants.
• You allow your friends and others the space they need.
• You can admit to others if you have made a mistake. (kidshelpline.com)
Respect is something that we need to learn, it doesn't come naturally. This means that children can be
taught and trained to become respectful. How can respect be taught to children given the this is very
much needed by the Gen, & Alpha generations? Are we telling o are we teaching?
Children learn by
observing
Parents, grandparents, teachers, etc. have great influence on the children and may be their entire
universe.
Parents, teachers and significam
Parents,
others play a crucial role in developing respect. Parents and teachers usually serve as the first role
models to the children. As such, teaching kids good manners like respect begins with the significant
adult modeling it.
Convey the meaning of respect by modeling and teaching it. Borba (2002) suggested trying the following
tips:
A. If you are a parent or a teacher, treat each child as a very important person in the world in the
classroom. You may ask yourself this question, "If I treat my friends the way treat my child or learner,
would I have any friends left?"
B. Give love with no strings attached. Make sure the love you give to your children and learners is
unconditional and guaranteed. So no matter what, the child is assured of you love. This does not mean,
however, that all behaviors will be approved. Some actions are inappropriate and they need to be given
passionate correction.
C. Listen attentively and respectfully. One behavior that parents and teachers need to do is to listen -
really listen - to the children. Attentive listening is a wonderful way to convey respect.
D. Build positive self-concept. Labeling children can have self-fulfilling prophecies. Use only labels that
build positive self- concept. It is important to remember that if the nickname or label is not respectful, it
is best not to use it.
E. Parents need to tell their children why they love and cherish them as well as make their children their
priority, Labels such as stupid or "dungol" or "tanga" are a No No.
F. Respectful rules can be instilled at home and in the classroom. The rules can be sel together in a
democratic manner. The rules may include respecting privacy, listening each other or setting rules how
to borrow things.
G. Don't engage when treated disrespectfully. Just clearly refuse to continue the conversation until the
child stops being rude - and do it every time the child is disrespectful.
H. Teach new behaviors to replace the inappropriate ones. Children learn new behavior through
repetition, so practice the new behavior correctly again and again until it" mastered. Bchavior change
may require a minimum of three weeks, so be consistent n teaching the new behavior. The best time to
teach is when the atmosphere is calm al
1.
relaxed and not during a period of conflict.
Bncourage respectful behavior through reinforcement of the good being done. So who your pleasure.
you see or hear children practicing respectful behaviors, acknowledge them and expres classroom to
develop respect.
In addition, Borba (2002) designed a number of activities which can be used in the classroom to develop
respect B. Courtesy and Politeness
Courtesy is polite behavior that reflects
THANKyOu
Excuse me
good manners, respect and kindness to others.
It means avoiding sarcasm and overbearing behavior.
The home is the first seat of courtesy and politeness as with the other virtues and manners.
When members of the family are courteous to each other, that's how they will treat people outside of
their homes. A courteous child is easier to befriend than someone who has ill manners.
When children have good social skills, they are polite and courteous, they listen to other when they
speak, and use polite phrases such as "thank you" and "excuse me"
E
Today's children are digital natives. Early in life they can already operate different gadgets and they
become smarter because of their exposures. However, it is not enough that they are bright, but they
should also have social skills needed to get along well with others.
Courteous behavior is as important as gaining knowledge at school.
Behaving courteously and politely can be a way of life and not just be showcased during special
occasions or events. It is not pakitang tao to impress or avoid embarrassment to the family status. Polite
behavior is automatic wherever the person is and not something to be switched on or off.
Courteous children have a social advantage over children who are not. They can easily develop
friendships and gain the respect of people around them. They are armed with the social skills that can
benefit them for life.
There are helpful tips to help teach our children and learners courtesy and politeness:
A. You first
This means that the parent is always the first and foremo teacher. When the child is in school, the
teacher becomes to second parent assuming the loco parents role. Thus, parents all teachers are
expected to be positive examples to the child in term of showing good manners.
By modeling good manners, you are not only strengthen. your child's social graces, but also teaching
him/her that bell courteous and polite are a normal part of social interaction.

B. Turn up the tolerance

When
your child
or learner observes that you
can tolerate and respect individual differences you clearly convey the message that you accept diversity.
Show them that differences with other people in terms of color, appearance, size, status, or beliefs are
fine with you.
C. Read the signs
Help children learn how to read people's emotional signs. You can act out by showing different facial
expressions and body language with the corresponding emotions.
Encourage them to pay attention to how others might be feeling and show them, through your
examples, how to react with courtesy, politeness, empathy, and compassion.

D. Mind your manners

Please, thank you,
good
morning and
good
afternoon
greetings never go out of style. If a parent or teacher uses these words for example in their daily
transactions, delighted responses can be solicited from the children. This is not a difficult thing to do but
can go a long way. The problem sometimes is when children show courtesy and their actions are not
responded to appropriately,
E. Lend a helping hand
It's good to encourage children to assist people, especially those in need such as giving help to an old
person or opening the door for someone who carries heavy stuff.
The little things our children can do can
become bigger in the future. A great future starts now, and it starts with our children.
F. Lesson integration
The learning of a manner/ value can be integrated in'a lesson.
A sample scenario can be presented such as interrupting an adult when adults are having a
conversation. The exercise will involve children waiting patiently for their turn until the adults will are
done with their conversation. This can be demonstrated in a one-on-one situation or in a group setting.
Parents and teachers should not get easily discouraged because beginning a process will always be
challenging. The keys to helping children become courteous and polite are patience and consistency.

G. Tolerance
Tolerance is generally understood as a necessary component of a functioning democracy and stable
world order.
"Tolerance is respect, acceptance and appreciation of the rich diversity of our world's cultures, our
forms of expression and ways of being human...Tolerance is
Learning tolerance is vital to world peace
harmony in difference."
Tolerance is often invoked as something for which individuals and societies should aspire, especially
given
diversity, in all its forms, which is increasingly a feature of contempora democracies. When tensions
arise, some leaders call for a"greater tolerare of particular groups or encourage general efforts to
become" a more toler society." For example, in 2004, then Secretary- General of the UN, Kofi Amp said,
"Tolerance, intercultural dialogue and respect for diversity are mo essential than ever in a world where
peoples are becoming more and mo closelv interconnected" (United Nations, 2004).
Tolerance is a virtue. If we want to be treated decently, we need to treat them decently as well.
For children, the specific concepts of tolerance that can be introduce:
concretized and internalized according to the following age groups include:

Age group: 3 - 7 years

• We are all unique and have something valuable to offer and share. Tolerance is accepting others and
appreciating differences.
• Tolerance is accepting myself, even when I make mistakes. Tolerance is accepting others, even when
they make mistakes.
Age group:8- -14years:
Peace is the goal; tolerance is the method.
• Tolerance is being open and receptive to the beauty of differences.
Tolerance is respecting and appreciating the culture of others.
• Tolerance is mutual respect through mutual understanding
• The seeds of intolerance are fear and ignorance.
• The seed of tolerance, love, is watered by compassion and care.

Those who know how to appreciate the good in people and situations have tolerance.
Tolerance is an act of humanity, which we must nurture and enact each in our lives everyday.
Tolerance is the ability to face difficult situations.
.
To tolerate life's inconveniences is to let go, be light, make others light,
and move on.
• Tolerance recognizes individuality and diversity while removing divisive masks and defusing tension
created by ignorance. (For 12- to 14-year-old students only.)

Children are born to the world without biases or prejudices. Along the way they learn values and beliefs
from adult models and peers. Teaching tolerance can be done in various settings whether at home or in
school.
A parent can try these steps:
. Set a good example. Kids learn from observing your interactions with others. If you're respectful to all
people, your children will follow suit. Positive role modeling is the starting point that every parent ought
to remember.
Expose your child to different cultures. The friendships your child has, can have a lasting effect. The
exposure to friends who differ from them in terms of socio-economic status, municipality
of origin,
spoken language can facilitate their understanding of tolerance.
• Bring the message home. When your child makes an insensitive remark, remind him/her of how she
feels when s/he isn't treated well by friends and ask him/her
"How do you think that boy felt when none of the kids would play with him because he is so big?"

Treat your youngster with respect.

If the child feels good about herself and is confident about her place in the world, she will be less likely
to be fearful of people who are different from her. A child who feels secure in your love and has a
positive self-image will have no need to put someone else down to feel valuable or powerful.
A teacher can create a haven of tolerance by engaging in
these
strategies:
• Let Your Bulletin Boards "Speak"
The class bulletin board can display positive messages
encouraging
diversity, tolerance, acceptance and making your classroom a safe space.
Making your classroom comfortable and accepting as a physical space can help students who are
struggling in their personal lives, especially students who have become victims of
bullying.
• Acknowledge Learner and Teacher
Emotions
There are events in the life of the learner or the teacher which are emotionally charged like for example
losing during the school's sports events. One of the best things to do is to create a space where
everyone can acknowledge those emotions and ask questions freely while moderating the discussion.
• Explain Terms and Concepts
Related to Current Events
The COVID 19 pandemic resulted in many changes in people's way of life. Parents and teachers can
explain what the pandemic is all. about and how people can be kind to each other and not discriminate
especially the front-liners. Concepts of generosity and sharing can be discussed within the family.
• Foster a Sense of Empathy in your Classroom
Many teachers consider empathy as the antidote to bullying, and there's data to back that up. You can
bring more empathy into your teaching by encouraging critical thinking and self-reflection.
Most students, and in fact most people,
see themselves as the
underdog in their lives and helping the class understand the nature of that vulnerability can make a
safer space for your students.

Lead by Example
Time and time again to lead by example is emphasized.
We need to
remember that our learners look up to use and watch what we do. We can create a higher standard of
behavior by showing our learners how to treat others with tolerance, respect, and sympathy.

D. Fairness
Have you ever said to someone
"what you did to me was unfalph
How do you know when something Is unfair? Has anybody ever tricker you or cheated on you? How did
you feel about it?
What does treating people fairly mean? Does fairness mean everyone gets the same amount, like an
equal piece of a chocolate bar? Does fairness mean enforcing the rules for everyone, even if it means
losing a game? How is fairness exercised in the classroom? How should you treat people who are not
fair to you? How does fairness affect your relationships with other people - your friends for example?
What is fairness? According to Seligman & Peterson (2004), it is treating all people the same and giving
everyone a fair chance. In addition,
fairness,
according to
Merriam-
Webster's Dictionary, is" marked by impartiality and honesty; conforming with the established rules."
There are times that when people think of fairness they think of it as equality, too. They are actually two
different things because fairness has to do with giving everyone what he or she needs and deserves. On
the other hand, equality is giving everyone the same thing or amount, regardless of the
circumstances.
Children in the elementary grades are concrete thinkers as theorized by Piaget. Thus, fairness can be an
abstract concept to them. Children especially the younger ones tend to be naturally egocentric, so they
tend to think of themselves first. They will probably identify a situation or action that works against
them as unfair, but will have. difficulty identifying an as action they perform as unfair to others. Fairness
is especially challenging for young children to understand. With other traits, like kindness or
responsibility, there are concrete actions to observe which may provide a basic understanding of the
concept itself. However, fairness is found in the way we treat one another, the way in which we play a
game, the way in which live life, etc.
Examples of being fair include playing by the rules, taking turns, sharing and listening to others, being
open-minded, respecting people, being supportive of friends,
among
others. Wrongly blaming or punishing somebody for something, excluding other children from play or
not giving the person the chance to explain one's side are examples of unfairness. Thus, to make fairness
more understandable for young children, the following strategies can be tried:
1. Have children brainstorm
and
role play solutions such as trading toys, sharing and playing together.
They can practice turn-taking such as when they play. This provides children with a basic understanding
of taking turns, an important element of fairness.
2. Be attuned to children's interactions and be ready to respond immediately to incidents of unfairness.
3. Identify and point out fair and unfair behaviors. Draw attention to behaviors in books, movies and in
life when others are acting in a fair or unfair manner. The child can be asked of what has been observed
in reality.
4. Encourage
a
safe and secure
atmosphere in which children feel free to express their feelings and ask questions.
5. Praise fairness. Take a moment to recognize and verbalize when your child is acting out of fairness.
Helping him/her to notice fairness in ones own behaviors will help him/ her to grow in understanding of
the concept.
6. Make the idea of fairness concrete.
Use images to inspire conversations about fairness.

In as much as children are taught how to be fair in their dealings' with others, it is also important that
teachers exhibit fairness inside the classroom. If students are asked what, are the most important
qualities they look for in teachers, one of the most universally mentioned is fairness. It is likely that the
learner assesses how fair the teacher is based on one's perceptions.
Thus, Rodabaugh gave a typology of learners' perceived fairness which includes 3 components:
A. Interactional fairness - the kind of interaction between teacher and learners.
B. Procedural fairness - the rules for grading and classroom administration.
C. Outcomes fairness - the distribution of scores and grades
Teachers can benefit by remembering these tips on how to be fair and ethica inside the classroom.
Teachers ought to show:
1. Impartiality. Learners expect their teacher to treat everyone in the class equally; that is no favorites. It
is likely that some children are ver) likable and may cause the teacher to show subtle signs of differences
in interaction such as frequently calling on the child to recite. This might lead some children to think that
the classmate is favored by the teacher.
To avoid giving the impression of partiality, the teacher needs to carefully monitor behavior and
interactions with the children.
2. Respect. Respect involves treating learners politely. Ridiculing a learner
or calling a learner's comment as
"stupid" is inappropriate
in
all
circumstances.
They
expect
teacher who listens, carefully considers, and give thoughtful replies. to their ideas. A teacher who is
perceived as impatient. or demeaning, either directly through
comments or indirectly through tone of voice, facial expressions, or posture, loses learners' respect.
Patience is especially difficult when learners actively misbehave in class. However, learners also expect
teachers to be polite in those situations. Should you face disrespect, try tO remain civil and calm,
thereby modeling the appropriate behavior for students.
It is always appropriate to meet privately with an offending learner, during which you can be more
direct in communicating expectations for classroom deportment.
3. Concern for students.
Students
expecttheir teachers to
care about them and their academic performance. You can demonstrate such concern by learning and
using students names, talking to them before and after class, carefully answering questions, and inviting
them who appear to be having problems with the subject to discuss those problems and potential
solutions. You also can express concern by giving due consideration to student complaints, taking
remedial action when the complaints are valid, and carefully explaining your position when the
complaints are not valid.
4. Integrity. Integrity means being consistent and truthful and explaining your policies, procedures and
decisions and why they are necessary, so that their fairness can be judged and understood. For example,
an attendance policy may be justifiable because attendance is correlated with increased learning and
better grades. Explaining the educational goals of various types of assignments also can be effective. You
also can demonstrate integrity by delivering promised rewards and penalties and admitting ignorance
when appropriate.
5. Propriety. Propriety means acting in a socially acceptable manner that does not offend students'
sensibili-ties. Students expect you to follow the rules when interacting with them, even if you believe
there might be pedagogical value in breaking them.
For example, research indicates that most students find it inappropriate in most or all circumstances for
a teacher to tell an offensive joke or use one of the learners to be the subject of a joke.

To conclude the discussion on fairness, try these doable steps inside and outside of the classroom.
Doable steps on how to be a fair person:
• Treat people the way you want to be treated.
• Take turns.
• Tell the truth. Play by the rules.
Think about how your actions will affect others.
• Listen to people with an open mind.
• Don't blame others for your mistakes. Don't take advantage of other people. Don't play favorites.
Fairness may not be taught as easily as other character traits, but with consistency, children will
recognize fairness and act fairly towards others.
When children develop their sense of fairness we lay down the foundation of empathy and sensitivity, in
turn prevent bullying and can help them through life.
E. Self-Control
Temptations abound. Studies or social media? Water or soda? Cut classes or attend classes? Drugs or
cigarettes?
Fast foods or vegetables? The choices are endless and sometimes our
self-control and will power are being
put to a test. Self-control is the ability to manage one's impulses, emotions, and behaviors to achieve
long-term 80a, This is unique in human beings this- separates us from the rest
.
animal kingdom.
self-contro
is primarily rooted in the prefrong
cortex
the planning, problem.
solving and decision making сель of the brain--which is significant larger in
humans than
in othe
mammals.
The richness of nerve connections in the prefrontal comer enables people to plan, evalua alternative
actions, and ideally avoid doing things they'll later regret, rather than immediately respond to ever,
impulse as it arises.
Self-control has three main parts:
• Monitoring which involves keeping track of your thoughts, feeling and actions. In one study, first-year
female college students who weighed themselves every day, compared with those who did not, were
buffered from the typical weight gain that accompanies the first year in college (Levitsky et al., 2006).
The same is true when it comes to our money.
Keeping track of how much we save and spend relates to having more money.
• Standards are guidelines that steer us toward desirable responses. Our standards originate from
society and culture. Think of the speed limit sign that tells you how fast to drive or the laws that tell you
to pay your taxes.
Follow the rules, and you'll be fine.
Break the rules, and there will be consequences. We also have personal standards that govern our
behavior If I have certain religious beliefs.! might think that it is inappropriatt to eat certain foods, think
certain thoughts or feel certain emotions.

Strength refers to the we need to control our impulses.

energy
Numerous factors affect our self. control
strength, such as mental exhaustion and stress. Effective self. control hinges on all three ingredients
working together. Without monitoring, you know what you need to do and have the energy to do it, but
you struggle to accomplish much because you do not keep track of your progress. A world without
standards is a recipe for chaos. Chronically depleted self- control strength can leave people with the
knowledge of what they should do without giving them the energy to do it. Like a three-legged stool,
kick off one self-control ingredient and the odds are that your self-control will topple over.
How important is self-control? Self-control improves life in three ways:
Self-control contributes to the person's well-being
Self-control, relates to better health.
Physically, self-controlled people sleep better, experience fewer physical sickness symptoms and live
longer lives. They also enjoy better mental health. Self- control relates to lower anxiety and depression.
Behaviors that relate to mental health problems, such as substance use and suicide, are less common
among self-controlled people.
People with self-control are likely to reach their goals.
Self-control builds and strengthens relationship
Beyond wealth or
good
looks,
people want self- controlled relationship partners. We want to spend our lives with people we can trust,
who follow through on their promises and who will override their impulse to leave or lash out when
things get tough. Self-controlled people are forgiving and react to conflict with benevolence rather than
violence.
Self-control makes socleties productive
Self-control helps societies flourish.
Self-controlled people, compared to their less-controlled counterparts, earn more money. Not only do
self-controlled people enjoy greater wealth, they behave more generously. They override. their selfish
impulses and go out of their way to help others. On a broader level, societies that have clear- cut
standards for appropriate behavior tend to function better than do societies in which people do as they
please. Societies also benefit from monitoring how their citizens behave. Is the Philippines reaping these
benefits? Filipinos now pay the price of their lack of self-control especially in terms of waste disposal.
Flash floods destroy lives and property
during
typhoons or heavy monsoon rains.
Duckworth
&
Seligman
(2005)
conducted a study to determine the role of self-control and intelligence in predicting year-end GPA. It
involved adolescent students who answered measures off intelligence and self-control at the beginning
of the school year. Self- control outdid 10 2-to-1 in predicting academic achievement.
This is goodnews especially to those whose IQ may not be superior. 10 doesn't often budge, but self-
com
Students can boost
their GPA
through the exercise of self-control, hard work, and persistence in the face work, and failure and
temptations.

Classroom management can be challenging especially when children don't have self-control. But hope
springs eternal because young children can be taught self-control through specific ways such as
everyday games and relatable activities.
A. Secret Code Word
Children may not have realized that their actions and voices are out of control. They need to be aware of
their behavior so they can do something about it.
For this strategy, the teacher and the learner agree on a secret code word to remind him or her. It can
be anything. It can be any word such as unicorn, malling, etc. that can be said by the teacher to the child
The code word helps children become aware of their behaviors and hopefully stops what's being done.
B. Calming Space
An important part of encouraging self regulation is to provide a space for students to, go when they
need to calm down and refocus This is NOT a time-out or a punishment. It is simply a place where a
student can choose to go if a break would help them to get back on track." A teacher may suggest that a
student goes to the designated area, but a student should not be forced to go there. The calming space
can be set up with resources that can de-stress the child and keep him or her focused. The child returns
to class " after some time. Perhaps, this can be set up in collaboration with the guidance counselor.

C. Talk About It
This may be the most simple tip, but the most important. Self control is a skill. It is a skill that needs to
be taught, talked about and encouraged. If our students have not learned about self control, we can't
expect them to use it. Keep on inspiring the learners and guided conversations on the pros and cons of
self-control can be initiated.
D. Play Activities/Games.
These are non-threatening ways to help teach self-control and effective in controlling impulses.
The teacher needs to process the experience after playing. Games make the teaching of self-control fun.
Some sample games which we are familiar with but are helpful include:
• Statue Dance
In an open space or inside the classroom, play music. Students will dance while the music plays, and
when the music stops, students will freeze! If you want to add a layer of difficulty, when students freeze,
have them strike a karate pose. Anyone who is caught moving gets eliminated.
• Simon Says
The teacher gives an instruction like, "Touch your nose," but students only follow the directive if
the directive begins with, "Simon says." For example, students would not touch their noses if the
teacher says,
"Touch your nose," but they would '
touch their noses if the teacher said, "Simon says touch your nose." Or you can use your name to title
this game.
• Statue with Action!
For this game, the teacher stands on one side of the room and the students stand on the other. The
teacher turns the back to the students. The . students begin silently moving toward the teacher. The
teacher can then turn around, but when the teacher turns around, all students must freeze in a statue
position and hold it until the teacher turns around again! Anyone the teacher sees moving is out of the
game.

There are other games which can be used such as musical one of trip o
Jerusalem. What the teacher needs to do is create and innovate.
E. Create an Environment that Rewards Self-Control.
More often than not, teachers pay attention to misbehaviors more than they notice good behaviors. It's
about time that children who monitor and control behavior are recognized and rewarded. The rewards
need not be of high value, but you can think of rewards or incentives that can truly motivate them to
exercise self-restraint.
• Older students enjoy learning practical strategies that they can use now. Here are , four tips they can
use to improve their self-control.
• 1. Become a mental energy accountant.
Many students plan how they spend their time. Few students plan how they spend their limited self-
control energy. Encourage students to spend the next week considering what they will do and how
much self-control energy they will need to do it. How much time do you spend for social media, online
gaming or studying?
• 2. Build self-control strength.
Self-control relies on an all-purpose energy resource. You can strengthen your self-control by doing
seemingly unrelated self-control tasks. For two weeks, encourage your students to use their non
dominant hand to complete everyday tasks (e.g., cleaning, brushing their teeth. Research indicates that
this simple exercise increases self-control in other domains, such as reducing aggression (Denson et al.,
2011).
: 3. Play offense against your environment.
Roy Baumeister and John Tierney (2011) argue that self-controlled people
:
take control over their environment. If students want to lose weight, refrair from drinking soda. If they
need to submit a course portfolio as requirement, the cellphone is switched off. Encourage the learners
to identify one way they can change their environment to help them achieve a specific goal. Ask them to
implement the change for three days. Later, ask students to share their experiences about how the
environmental change influenced their ability and motivation to achieve their goal.
4. Take the mind out of the middle.
Self-control hurts because we have to battle against ourselves. Should exercise now or later? Should I
study now or check my FB account? A solution is to take the mind out of the middle by setting up a
mental contract, what psychologist Peter Gollwitzer and colleagues call implementation intentions
(Gollwitzer & Sheeran, 2006). To achieve an academic goal, students might say, When I get home from
class, I will read. This sounds simple, but it works

LESSON 3
DEVELOPING CONCERN FOR OTHERS

INTRODUCTION
Michael Jackson popularized the song "Heal the World" and some lines
run like this:
Heal the world
Make it a better place
For you and for me
And the entire human race
There are people dying
If you care enough for the living
Make it a better place For you and for me..
The world needs people who are willing to help their fellowmen and heal the world especially in this
time of the pandemic. Imagine a world without Mother Teresa, St. Francis of Assisi, Nelson Mandela,
Mahatma Gandhi, - Efren Peñaflorida, Jr., Randy Halasan, and so many others.
Imagine a world without the frontliners, during pandemic. Imagine a world without the countless
individuals who risked heir own lives to save others during wartime. Imagine a world without those
who've run into burning buildings or executed other heroic feats of rescue during times of trauma. It's
unthinkable. Empathy and compassion are very "in" concepts as the world becomes
More and more technologically advanced. People may have the tendency to engage in solitary activities
and be highly individualistic. These are not things of the past, instead they are relevant in modern
everyday life. After all, they have the power to inspire courageous deeds and can also encourage all
sorts of positive behaviors that have both individual and societal benefits.

ABSTRACTION
Evolutionary biologists have shown that human beings are social animals have naturally evolved to care
for each other. Psychology, as well, points ou we are primed for empathy by strong attachment
rolationships in the first two ye. of life. As we grow older we learn to be sensitive to the presence and
needs of o people. We nurture relationships but there are times that we only look within & immediate
sphere like our families but not easily beyond such.

The discussion will focus on empathy and compassion which are important to be responsive to the
needs of other people and become concerned of other people's plights.

Empathy

Empathy is at the heart of what it means to be HUMAN. The concept of empathy is used to refer to a
wide range of psychological capacities that are thought of as being central for constituting humans as
social creatures allowing us to know what other people are thinking and feeling, to engage with them
emotionally, to share their thoughts and feelings and to care for their well-being.
Empathy is, therefore a broad concept that refers to the cognitive and emotional reactions of an
individual to the observed experiences of another. Having empathy increases the likelihood of helping
others and
showing compassion. It is the ability to recognize, understand, and share the thoughts and feelings of
another person, animal or fictional character.
It's being able to step into the shoes of other persons, aiming to understand their feelings and
perspectives, and to use that understanding to guide our actions.
In the Philippine setting, it can be roughly translated to pakikiramdam.
Empathy helps us cooperate with others, build friendships, me. moral decisions and intervene who we
see others being bullied. It is vis in building successful Interpersonal relationships of all types, in the
familyunit, workplace, and beyond. Empat, helps us connect and help
others, but like other traits, there is the danger that it may have evolved with a selfish motive: using
others as a "social antenna" to help detect danger.
There are three kinds of empathy according to the Daniel Goleman's article entitled "Three Kinds of
Empathy"

1. Cognitive empathy -
This is simply knowing how the other person feels and what they might be thinking. Sometimes
called perspective-taking, this kind of empathy can help in, say, a negotiation or in motivating people.
Cognitive empathy, also known as empathic accuracy, involves having more complete and accurate
knowledge about the contents of another person's mind, including how the person feels. Cognitive
empatty is more like a skill. Humans lear to recognize and understand others' emotional state as a way
to process emotions and behavior.

2. Emotional empathy - This happens when the person feels physically along with the other person, as
though their emotions Were contagious. This emotional contagion, social neuro science tells us,
depends in large part on the mirror neuron system. Emotional empathy makes someone well-attuned to
Another person's inner emotional world, a plus in any of a wide range of callings, from sales to nursing,
for any parent or lover.
Emotional empathy includes three components:
A. The first is feeling the same emotion as another person;
B. The second is personal distress which refers to one's own feelings of distress in response to perceiving
another's plight;
C. The third emotional component is feeling compassion for another person.
3. Compassionate empathy - With this kind of empathy we not only understand a person's predicament
and feel with them, but are spontaneously moved to help, if needed. Parents Raising Children with
Empathy The following are five guideposts

How do we develop empathy?

There are two theories which neuroscientists explore to explain empathy. The first is the Simulation
Theory. This theory proposes that empathy is possible because when we see another person
experiencing an emotion, we 'simulate' or represent that same emotion in ourselves so we can know
firsthand what it feels like. There is a biological component to this theory as well. Scientists have
discovered preliminary evidence of "mirror neurons" that fire when humans observe and experience
emotion. There are also "parts of the brain in the medial prefrontal cortex (responsible for higher-level
kinds of thought) that show overlap of activation for both self-focused and other-focused thoughts and
judgments.

The second theory is the Theory of the Mind. The theory of the mind is the ability to "understand what
another person is thinking and feeling based on rules for how one should think or feel." This theory
suggests that humans can use cognitive thought processes to explain the mental state of others. By
developing theories about human behavior, individuals can predict or explain other's actions, according
to this theory.

While there might be differences in opinion, it is clear that empathy involves many processes that would
include automatic, emotional responses and learned conceptual reasoning. The roots of empathy start
to be planted at home and reinforced by the school.

based on research and the wisdom of practitioners from the Making Caring Common Project of Harvard
University Graduate School of Education

1. Empathize with your child and model empathy for others.

Children learn empathy both from watching us and from experiencing our empathy
for
them. When we empathize with our children they develop trusting, secure attachments with us. Those
attachments are key to their wanting to adopt our values and to model our behavior, and therefore to
building their empathy for others.
Empathizing with our children takes many forms, including tuning in to their physical and emotional
needs, understanding and respecting their individual personalities, taking a genuine interest in their
lives, and guiding them toward activities that reflect an understanding of the kind of people they are and
the things they enjoy.
Children also learn empathy by watching those we notice and appreciate. They'll notice how we treat
people from different walks of life. They'll notice if we welcome a new family in our child's school or
express concern about another child in class who is experiencing one challenge or another.
Finally, it's important for us to recognize what might be getting in the way of our empathizing. Some
parents may feel busted or stressed out. These should be taken into consideration through self-
awareness and self-care steps.
2. Make caring for others a priority and set high ethical expectations.
If children are to value others'

perspectives and show compassion for them, it's very important that they hear from their parents that
caring about others is a top priority, and tha it is just as important as their own happiness. Even though
most parents say that raising caring children is a top priority, often children aren' hearing that message.
3. Provide opportunities for children to practice empathy.
Children are born
with the
capacity for empathy, but it needs to be nurtured throughout their lives. Learning empathy is in certain
respects like learning a language or a sport. It requires practice and guidance.
Regularly
considering
other
people's
perspectives and
circumstances helps make empathy a natural reflex and, through trial and error, helps children get
better at tuning into others' feelings and perspectives.
4. Expand your child's circle of concern.
It is easy for us and the children to show empathy for family members, relatives, close friends but the
real issue is whether children (and adults) have empathy outside that circle. As parents and caretakers
it's not only important that we model appreciation. It's important that we guide children in
understanding and caring for many kinds of people who are different from them and who maybe facing
challenges very different from their own challenges.
5. Help children develop self-control and manage feelings effectively.
Often when children don't express empathy it's not because they don't have it. It's because some feeling
or image is blocking their empathy.
Often the ability to care for others is overwhelmed, for example,by anger, shame, envy, or other
negative feelings. Helping children manage these negative feelings as well as stereotypes and prejudices
about others is often what "releases" their empathy.

Children who are of school age spend a good amount of their time in the classroom. The school can do
so much in nurturing a culture of empathy among its learners.
Teachers Raising Children with
Empathy
The Making Caring Common Project of Harvard University Graduate School of Education likewise came
up with research-based strategies to help educators promote a culture of empathy within their schools.
It has been found out that when young people are high in empathy they have more classroom
engagement, higher academic achievement, better communication skills, lower likelihood of bullying,
less aggressive behaviors and emotional disorders and have more positive relationships.
Five Essential Steps to use in Schools
1. Model Empathy.
It all starts with the teacher. When frustrated with learners, pause and take a deep breath and try to see
the situation from their perspective before responding. When a learner is upset, reflect back his feelings
or the rationale for his behavior before redirecting the behavior.
Be aware of learners' non-verbal cues and follow up on them. For example, if a learner is slumping in her
chair and appearing withdrawn or angry, say something like "I noticed that you are quieter than usual
today.
Is something bothering you?" rather than immediately reprimanding her.
Ask for learners' input when appropriate and feasible (for example, when establishing classroom rules or
generating ideas for group projects) and really listen. Find opportunities to incorporate their feedback
and respond to their needs.
2. Teach what empathy is and why it matters.
Clearly and concretely explain that empathy means understanding and caring about another person's
feelings and taking action to help. Explain how it improves the classroom and school community.
Stress the importance of noticing and having empathy for people beyond immediate friends, including
those
who are different or who are too often invisible.
Give specific examples of how to act on empathy, such as helping, showing
kindness,
or even simply listening.
Role playing, story telling with lessons, and games inside the classroom can be helpful strategies that
children can relate with.
3. Practice.
Create opportunities to practice taking another's perspective and imagining what others are thinking.
Play charades and do role plays, read and discuss books and use «what would you do" style vignettes or
case studies.
Name the barriers to empatay, like stereotypes, stress, or fears of social consequences for helping an
unpopular peer.
Share specific strategies
TO
overcome them. For example, encourage students to privately offer kind and supportive words to a
student who was bullied.
Foster emotional and social skills, like dealing with anger and frustration and solving confliets. Teach
specific routines for calming down and resolving disputes. Use advisories and guidance and counseling
to develop social and ethical skills,
4. Set clear expectations.
Be clear that you expect students to care about one another and the enin school community. Don't just
put it; the mission statement of on a poster talk about it, model it, praise it and hop students to it.
Do an exercise with students to hey them reflect on who is inside and outside their circle. Discuss why
and how they can expand the circle of who they care about.
Establish specific guidelines
for
unacceptable language and behavion
Ban slurs or hurtful language like even when said ironically or in jest and step in if you hear them.
Encourage studens to think about why these words can be hurtful.
Enlist students in establishing rules and holding each other accountable. They will have a sense of
ownership of these rules. Use restorative justice practices and peer mediation when conflicts arise.
5. Makes school culture and climate a priority.
Make an annual survey of learners' and teachers" feelings whether they feel safe, respected, and cared
about at school. Take time to examine the data and make efforts to address problem areas identified by
the learners and staff.
As children learn empathy skills with their classmates, those skills will transfer to their lives in their
community.
The deeper relationships that result from strong empathy skills have the potential to strengthen a
community and build trust. The effects of community extend far beyond the four walls of your
classroom. And when they develop empathy, they can exhibit compassion.
The next value that is related with empathy is compassion.
COMPASSION
'If you want to know what compassion is, look into the eyes of a mother and father as they cradle their
sick and fevered child."

Dalai Lama
It was previously mentioned that when children develop empathy this can lead to compassion. When
you sympathize, you understand what the other person is feeling without exactly feeling it but when you
empathize you feel what the other person
The short story below Taken from morning is a powerful, moving story of compassion. Read and learn
how compassion can impact on other people's lives It seems that a young man, named Mark, was
walking home from school one day when he noticed that a boy ahead of him had tripped and dropped
all of the books he was carrying, along with two sweaters, a baseball bat, a glove, and a small tape
recorder. Mark knelt and helped the boy pick up the scattered articles.
Since they were going the same way, he helped the boy carry part of the burden. As they walked, he
discovered the boy's name was Bill, that he loved video games, baseball, history, and that he was having
lots of trouble with his other subjects!' They arrived at Bill home first, and Mark was invited in for a Coke
and to watch some television. The afternoon passed pleasantly with a few laughs and some shared small
talk; then Mark went home. They continued to see each other around school, had lunch together once
in a while, then both graduated from junior high school. They ended up in the same high school where
they had brief contacts over the years.

Finally, the long-awaited senior year came, and three weeks before graduation, Bill asked Mark if they
could talk. Bill reminded him of the day years ago when they had first met. "Did you ever wonder why I
was carrying so many things home that day?" asked Bill. "You see, I cleaned out my locker because I
didn't want to leave a mess for anyone else. I had stored away some of my mother's sleeping pills, and I
was going home to commit suicide. But after we spent time together talking and laughing, 1 realized
that I didn't want to die. I would have missed that time with you and so many other good times in my
life that followed. What I am trying to say, Mark, is when you picked up those books that day, you did a
lot more. You saved my life."
Have you ever heard of a parallel or similar story? The story conveys a beautiful lesson how a small
gesture can change the life of someone. Mark could have just expressed sympathy, but he went the
extra mile and showed empathy and compassion. As Mother Teresa or St. Teresa of Calcutta reminds us,
"We cannot do great things of this earth. We can only do small things with great love."
feeling. The feeling of empathy can trigger compassion and take action to relieve the suffering of
another person.
Compassion is a relational process that involves noticing another person's pain, experiencing an
emotional reaction to his or her pain, and acting in some way to help ease or alleviate the pain (Kanov,
et al.,
2004). Compassion is usually aroused when someone sees another person suffering and is motivated to
help. Compassion in this respect is regarded as an affective state defined by a subjective feeling.
Compassion is something you can develop with practice.
This is pakikiramay among Filipinos. It involves two things: intention and action.
Intention is simply opening your heart to others and action is what you do about it.

Compassion is from the Latin word passio which means to suffer with the prefix com, meaning together
and thus to suffer together or to suffer with. Cassell (2009) reported the following three requirements
for compassion:
1. "That the troubles that evoke our feelings are serious;"
2. "that the sufferers' troubles not be self-inflicted that they be the result of an uniust fate;" and
3. "we must be able to picture ourselves in the same predicament"

On a similar vein, Kanov, et al. (2004) consider compassion to be comprised of three interrelated
elements which are:
1. Noticing. A critical first step is noticing another person's suffering and becoming aware of the pains/
she is feeling. Noticing often requires an openness and receptivity to what is going on in those around
us, paying attention to others' emotions, and reading subtle cues in our daily interactions with them.
Noticing may come in the form of a cognitive recognition of another person's suffering or may be first
experienced through an unconscious physical or emotional reaction to the person's distress.
2. Feeling. Compassion is a social emotion because it is inherently other. regarding. It means to suffer
with the person. The feelings may be more o less intense, can last over a long peric. of time or be
experienced briefly. The feelings of compassion may also vary in form; either of a simple nature by
simply feeling concern for another or a mix of more complex set of emotions.
3. Responding.
This
is the element
that refers to any action or display that occurs in response to another person's pain or helping the
sufferer
live through it
Compassionate
responding doesn't exactly mean that the immediate causes of someone's suffering may be right away
fixed or corrected. For example, holding someone's hand while listening to her story taking care of a
terminally ill parent can be just as compassionate as when giving money to someone who needs it for a
medical emergency.
As such, compassion is not an automatic response to another's plight; it is a response that occurs only
when the situation is perceived as serious, unjust and relatable.

Benefits of Compassion
Heather Lonezak, an advocate of positive psychology, pointed out a number of benefits when people are
compassionate. She said that various researchers have empirically proven that increased compassion is
related to increased happiness and decreased depression, compassion interventions promote social
connection and compassion interacts with social support to buffer against physiological reactivity to
stress. In addition, compassion is associated with improved parent-child relationship and compassion for
teachers by colleagues is linked with organizational commitment, job satisfaction and sense of
emotional vigor.
Compassion within classrooms is related to increased cooperation and better learning. Compassion
benefits classrooms by contagion. Kinder, happier, and healthier students are present in classrooms with
higher levels of compassion.
Studies show that the more compassionate the teacher, the more easily students will learn. The earlier
children learn empathy and appropriate prosocial behavior such as compassion, the fewer the incidents
of bullying and antisocial behavior in later childhood.

It requires a certain level of awareness, concern and empathy.

Compassion Deficit Disorder
What is compassion deficit disorder?
It is the child's tendency to act without empathy or regard for others. Diane Levin, a Boston professor of
early childhood education, introduced the concept of compassion deficit disorder which seems to be
displayed by children especially of the young generation. How does Diane Levin explain compassion
deficit disorder? What are its causes?
According to her, the compassion deficit disorder can be attributed to:
1. Children
are spending increasing
amounts of time with more and more technology and screen exposure
at a young and younger age. This results in their lack of opportunity to develop social skills.
2. Children's exposure to violent and anti-social models can teach them anti-social lessons that they
bring to their relationships.
3. Children play with toys that are realistic replicas of what they see on screen. These toys can trigger
children to imitate what they saw on television rather than encouraging them to engage in the rich,
creative play of childhood.
5. Many families
are experiencing
stress that they resort to the screen or technology to occupy their children and would need not spend a
lot of time watching over them. They become occupied with what they watch, behave and pose no
bother at all.
6. There are also instances that parents structure too much what they want their children to engage in.
This prevents the child to organize or learn to organize activities that can enhance interactions with
other children.

We do not want this to happen to the young generation of Filipino children. What can be done? This
phenomenon may not only be true in the Western culture may but may also be happening in the Filipino
homes. A fen helpful tips were given by Levin such as:
1. As much as possible, limit young children's exposure to high tech, media and commercial cultures. The
younger the child, the shorter the exposure per day, The longer the delay in exposing them to
technology, the better in terms or helping the child develop a repertoire of social skills, developing a
healty sense of self and quality play.
2. Make children understand the things they are exposed to. This can be done by staying connected with
the child around these issues.
• 3. The school curriculum should not be purely academic in nature, rather social
• curriculum is now very important.
4. The teacher is encouraged to connect with other adults in the child's life. family members, other
parents and teachers to support each other's efforts to promote children's positive social development
and relationships.

The development of empathy develops at different stages of the child's life.

The development of
empathy is necessary for compassionate behavior to develop as well. Teaching compassion, therefore,
starts at birth.
In the first year, kids develop global empathy. They match the emotions that they witness. When a
father picks up his child and soothes him by singing, the child calms down and reacts to the facial
expressions of his compassionate dad. The child is learning compassion in these foundational
interactions.
During the second year, kids actively offer help. Parents actively encouraging this helping behavior
reinforces their desire to continue it. Praising the behavior and reinforcing the effect that the
compassion has on the recipient is further reinforcement. Using phrases like, "that was so kind"will
reinforce the child's understanding of the behavior and its effect in real-world settings. By year three,
kids become aware that the feelings of others can be different from their own feelings.
This change comes with a deeper understanding of language. The more words a child can use in
explaining empathy and the actions of compassion, the deeper the understanding of its
"how do importance will be. Asking, "how do you think they felt?" can be à powertil way to ignite child's
ability empathize with another.
Empathy for another's conditions Living are developed in late childhood or early adolescence.
Understanding that another person's feelings might not be based around a current situation, but rather
their more lasting life situation develops in this stage of childhood.
Since the home is the seedbed of learning good manners and right conduct, empathy and compassion
can be developed through compassionate parenting. The major key is always the
quality of parenting.

Compassionate parenting Is essential component an of positive parenting.

Positive parents show compassion by
• Guiding and teaching your child by role modeling kind and compassionate behavior.
. Avoiding labeling children
"the brainy one," "the leader," "the failure,"etc.), as doing so is hurtful and promotes both sibling rivalry
and self-fulfilling prophecies. Time and time again this reminder is made for parents to avoid labeling
their children,not to play favorites,and respect each child's nature.
• Being sensitive to vour child's developmental stage.
Different
developmental stages have different needs which parents must be aware of.
• Practicing regular, open communi-cation. Many parents are too busy or stressed that they no longer
have time for their children or they, too, are as focused on their gadgets and everybody is into one's
own solitary activity. It is not the quantity of time that matters but the quality.
Providing affection and emotional warmth. Provide unconditional love.
Parents should love without strings attached. Practice positive discipline, which is warm and democratic,
and never violent.
Empathizing with your child's feelings.
Empowering autonomy in order to support creativity, empowerment and self-determination.
• Teaching respect for other living creatures by teaching him/her how to care for and show kindness to
animals. A child who respects plants and animals has a great capacity for respecting and showing
compassion to fellow human beings.
. Showing optimism and help your child to believe in him/herself and the future.
Once the child is in the school, teachers reinforce efforts which are planted at home. Teachers can do
well choosing from this array of activities which were advanced by Kelly Miller, another advocate of
positive psychology.

Activities and Exercises for Teachers to Use with Learners

1. Play is the business of children. Playing cooperative and tear bunding game, enable chi drun to have
call interaction with peers in a fun way. This promote, team building capacity and prosocial abilities.
They learn other values as well such as self-control, respect, fairness and the like.
2. The teacher can create a
"volunteer" helper
position in the classroom. Some schools have the buddy system, others have tutorial which allow for
mentorship roles for children. Helping a younger child in a particular subject, or guiding new students
through the school are great ways to foster empathy and compassion. Volunteering in community
activities (if COVID 19 is no longer a grave threat) can be a good way to instill compassion in children.
3. The teacher can encourage acts of kindness by helping kids focus on them.
Creating a jar, or a box, where students can anonymously offer instances o-
kindness in the classroom is a powerful way to get them interacting in a positive way. This ought to be
consistenty followed through and integrated in any subject in the elementary level.
4. Story telling is a magnificent strategy to reach out to students. Stories of important historical figures
or even ordinary, everyday people and their compassionate lives are powerful ways to inspire
compassion in students. Hearing stories of leaders that make a compassionate impact on the world,
show kids what is possible with intention. They can also be encouraged to write stories of persons they
know who showed acts of compassion to others. Or they can also been couraged to read books with
compassion themes.
5. Children can be encouraged to continue writing letters to medical frontliners or the military, or those
who lost their parents under difficult situations. etc. Or the letter can be written to sick children in
hospitals and how they can brighten up the child's condition. This will enable children to express their
compassion. It would be helpful if children are given
guidance on ho w to frame their letters from the heart.
6. Make children act it out (get kids role-playing in scenarios requiring compassion).
It can be scary at first, like a theater experience, but when kids get creative in practicing compassion in
role-playing, they are laying pathways to compassion for later, real-life experiences. Role playing will
enable the kids to simulate real life experiences and draw lessons from such.
7. Engage the entire class in brainstorming an imaginary crisis scenario such as Typhoon Yolanda, Taal
explosion, COVID 19) and how thy can help. Helping kids come up with solutions in crisis are powerful
ways for them to realize how vital compassion is, especially when situations are extremely dire.
8. Teach children, especially the older ones, loving-kindness meditation. There are many available and
taking the time to invest in this practice will lower stress for practitioners. This can start with thoughts of
mindfulness.

9. Tap the power of technology. Videos can be shown to the children to draw lessons from.
Gapped lecture can be utilized to drive the important points of the video.
10. Model, Model, Model. Show your learners what it means to have compassion toward others and
toward yourself. Be sure your interactions with children are with compassion.
Cultivating empathy and compassion in today's generation of learners can be the likely antidote against
bullying and aggressive behavior. It begins at home and continues at school. Together parents and
educators can do so much to educate the next generation on the importance of cooperation and
kindness in everyday life. What we focus on, we find. Focusing on cultivating compassion is vital to the
improvement of the successful adults of our
future.
It is also of importance to show self-compassion. There are times when a person views ones behaviors
and shortcomings without compassion. This can lead to constant ruminating about the faults and
inadequacies in such a way that erodes self-esteem and happiness.
Self-compassion involves
"self-
kindness versus self- judgment; a sense of common humanity versus isolation, and mindfulness versus
over- identification". It is away of recognizing one's imperfection and to see oneself from a comforting
rather than a critical perspective.
Self-compassion has been found to be related with reduced feelings of anxiety, depression, and
rumination.
As a closing to this lesson, here's another story written as a letter by Fr. Daniel Franklin Pilario, CM*
ANDREE
It was one Saturday morning at the Holy Spirit College sometime in
1997. I was in my last year of the Master's Program at the Catholic University of Leuven in Belgium, 1
was struggling with my multiple class requirements, a thesis to defend at the end of the school year, and
many other struggles of student life in a faraway country. Saturday is the only day in the week when I
can extend my sleep a bit. Then the phone at the corridor rang, The person who answered the call woke
me up. The lady at the other end of the line was looking for a Filipino oriest.
She introduced herself as
Andre, a retired pharmacy professor of the university, who is now working as a volunteer in the Belgian
high security prison in Leuven. She told me about the story of Armando, a Filipino father whom she met
in prison. Armando is a middle-aged suicidal man who has been crying days and nights since he landed
in jail. Andrée offered to look for a Filipino priest for him, someone with whom he can talk in his own
language. And she thought there are Filipino priests in the Holy Spirit College who can help her.
I was still very sleepy that morning, maybe on my third hour of sleep after struggling with thesis writing
until 3AM. I said yes any way.
How can you say no to a Belgian woman who is so worried about my Filipino compatriot, who, for
reasons I did not know, has landed in a Belgian jail? I had to rush to shower and had to meet her after an
hour at the prison which is
30-minute walk from where I was. She guided me through prison security and was ushered into the
reception hall It did not look like harsh prison - the way that | know, in the Philippines. It looks like a
charity. institution. Armando came out of his cell. And after being introduced, Andrée left us to talk.
He started talking, crying, trembling.
He is more than a month in this prison now, was missing his family in Bulacan, and he asked if I can
contact them for him. He was about to end his life the previous night - by showing me all his
maintenance pills in the palm of his hand
- and attempted to. drink them all at once. He was desperate and hopeless.
Then he asked me a question which struck me then and now about OFWs who risk their lives:
"Kasalanan bang dumiskarte at, maghanap-buhay para sa aking pamilya?" ("ls it as into look for ways to
make my family live?) That was just what he was trying to do, he told. me, and he landed in jail. He was
actually asked by a group of Filipinos
- through an agency - to "guide" them to Europe. Once they reach the airport,

their families in Rome or Germany or Italy would fetch them or instruct them where to go. And Armando
was also promised a job somewhere. That was the plan. But they were caught in the immigration. And
for acting as their head, Armando was charged with illegal human trafficking which led him to this high
security prison.
From that Saturday on, I promised Armando that I will come to visit him every week; bring him some
food, some phone cards or some news from his wife in Bulacan whom I promised to call every now and
then. Every time he asked me to call his wife, he tells me not to forget to tell her "I love you." | come
back the following week saying the same words to him from his wife. I did not mind my academic loads.
But directly or indirectly, Armando's struggles and stories which he keeps repeating for weeks on end,
gave me inspiration to finish. After some months (or years, | could no longer trace), Armando was freed
and was sent home to his family in Bulacan.

If not for Andree, we mignt not know where Armando would be. Maybe he could have ended his life in
prison.
Thanks to Andrée, Armando had a future.
But the story did not end there.
Andrée invited me to her house, introduced me to her husband, Francis, who is also a retired professor
of the university. They would like to see me on special occasions like Christmas or Easter or any special
occasion we can celebrate. For the remaining four years of my doctoral studies in Leuven, they decame
my family away from home. She would always ask how is my mother, my ather, my brothers and sisters.
Andrée pecame my mother away from home.
When 1 go home for vacation, she would send me chocolates and other stuff for

my family. And I bring her some nice linens or table runners which she loves so much, and use them
every time I visit them. When it was time for me to go home to the Philippines for good, they asked me
one single question which
has changed the lives of many young people in the Philippines.
The question
was: "how could we best help the young people in your country?"
There were
many options open. We zeroed in on one
- college scholarship for poor students who do not have the opportunity to get a good university
education.
We started with six students from Oslob and Mandaue in 2004. Todäy, we have more than twenty
graduates excelling in their own professions - and all helping their siblings get a good education
themselves, or helping their families construct a modest house,
Or build their own families themselves.
During all these years, Andrée would know each student-scholar by name, their stories, their parents
and siblings. She has their pictures with her. She sends them personal notes and to inspire them in their
studies, and gives them little gifts or loving cards of encouragement.
My last memory of Andrée was in March 2017 when I was invited to give a professorial lecture for the
Leuven Faculty of Theology on the Feast of St. Thomas Aquinas, its patron saint.
I invited both Francis and her to the lecture. | can sense that she was already weak.
But she and Francis obliged; and they both stayed until the end of the reception.
Since my parents could not come to these high academic celebrations in a foreign land, they stood in the
name of my parents. Before went back to Manila, they invited me to their home again. This time, it was
Francis who was busy serving. Andrée, though caring and concerned as always, was already quite weak.
But I know it was she who prepared all the food earlier. And at the end of the meal, she brought out her
chocolates and personal notes, addressed to each student-scholar on her list. She told me: "please tell
them to study well". What a loving gesture from a mother who has not seen any of them whom she
considers her children.

Andrée, now that you have left us, you will be happy to see that your children from this side of the world
have studied well, graduated with highest honors, and are working in decent jobs according to the
professions they have chosen. They are now paying it forward. Thank you for the opportunity that you
have given them. You are such an inspiration to all of us. Continue to inspire us and pray for us in
heaven. I thank God for having known you. Thank you for your life.

Sincerely,
Daniel Franklin Pilario,CM
St Vincent School of Theology Adamson UniversityFr. Pilario is a friend of the authors and gave
permission to re-print this letter posted in his FB page.

MODULE 3
THE GMRC TEACHER AS AN AGENT OF NATION BUILDING AND SUSTAINABLE ENVIRONMENT

LESSON 1
Caring and sharing for the earth

A. BE COMPASSIONATE AND DO NO
HARM
As a mother loves her one and only child, so shall you love the whole humanity. The Buddha
Our planet is incredibly gifted with resources that allow humans to survive. All that we need in order to
live are gifts from Mother Earth: the air we breathe, the food we eat, the water we drink and the homes
we run to for cover. Unfortunately, instead of nurturing the planet that nurtures us, humans have
damaged the earth's ability to sustain life. Numerous ecological concerns now threaten the destruction
of earth's life support systems. (Castro & Galace)

Abstraction

Compassion, in simple terms, refers to that quality which encompasses non-violence, kindness, empathy
and equanimity in the highest and purest form. It. takes people out of their pursuit of egoistic interests
to open their eyes to the realities of the suffering of others around them. It is the essence of being
human. Every religion teaches us to be compassionate and take it as the supreme guiding principle in
life. It drives man to be kind, helpful and caring towards all. Let us have a closer look at the basic five
forms of compassion mentioned above.
Non-Violence
Non-violence is an integral active quality in compassionate living. It means to abstain from all violent
acts and motives. In a conflict, to be non-violent does not mean that you submit yourself to unjust
causes.
There are many civilized and democratic was of struggling against unjust causes.
Mahatma Gandhi demonstrated the power of non-violent action in his struggle for freedom from the
British Empire. He said that only cowards take arms. Non-violent
Consider the following principles of non- violence:
*Hatred can not be conquered by hatred. Hatred can only be conquered by compassion.-Lord Buddha
2. 4f somebody slaps you on the left cheek turn your right cheek also.'-
Jesus Christ
3. "I respond to those who do well to me by goodness. I also respond to those who do evil to me by
goodness.'-Lao
Tzu
4. If someone lives a life of non-violence, he need not perform other religious acts because non-violent
living itself is the highest form of being religious.
- Thirukkural, The Tamil Instructional Book of Poetry
5. 'There is no such powerful weapon than Compassion. -Mahatma Gandhi

activists derive their power from truth, justice in ner conviction and compassion.

Kindness
This is the state of mind that motivates a person to help and serve those who suffer. Kindness
transcends the ego that seeks reward, profit and benefits in return. You can be kind in all your responses
to other people by the way you think, talk and behave. Kindness naturally extends to animals as well.
Children learn their first lesson of kindness, by being kind to animals. When children learn not to kill
animals, they also learn not to kill human beings. Kindness to animals seems to be gradually eroding
away from the modern mentality of man. Consider how cruelly animals are treated in laboratories,
farms, and slaughter houses. The figures show that in 1980 nearly 70 million animals have been killed for
research purposes only in laboratories. Dr. Bennett Derby, an eminent neurologist, says that 90 percent
of animal experiments are repetitive and inadequate. Every religion teaches kindness to animals.
supering in others. With empathy you share the other person's feling, experience " at i you have entered
into that person's inner world. Al it perchology 1t If used in a tochnical sense, here, we can use it in a 84,
and practical sense, 10 mean being sensitive, friendly, warm and caring. compassion empaily
encapsulates feelings not only for the fellow human be but a166 tor animals and natural environment.
Such qualites are necessary fo survival of the human species. The present dehumanizing social forces
dem empathy in man. It is slowly replaced by egoism, individualism, selfishnes. futhless competitiveness.
This important human response has to be protected developed as a part of upbringing and education of
children. Children in empathy intrinsically in abundance. Peace education provides experiences empathy
so that children can awaken to their own true nature. The tradition curriculum has very little place for
developing empathy.
Equanimity
Equanimity means maintaining a detached sense of calmness in mind a temper, in face of stressful and
provocative situations in life. It also includes bei large hearted and forgiving. The most effective way of
fostering compassion children is to provide opportunities to experience it through action. Such actio:
are:
• Understanding (others)
• Feeling (for)
• Providing support/helping/serving
• Tolerating
• Expressing warmth
• Loving
•Caring/consoling/counselling/comforting
• Listening
• Respecting
• Giving
• Being friendly
This aims at developing these types of behavior in us in such a way that they could be observed in our
daily interactions with others.
(Balasooriya, 2001)

Introduction
Lesson 1-B
Care for the planet

The earth does not belong to us; we belong to earth

-Res indian chief seattle

Abstraction

Understanding the Concept

This aims at developing the sense of «touch' with Nature in us. In fact, we are very sensitive to Nature.
But as we gradually grow into adulthood in this artificial surrounding of the modern era, the 'touch'
diminishes away from our life. Peace with nature is blissful, healing and fulfilling. It creates a deep
spiritual sense of communion with Nature, which brings about contentment and peace.
The ever-increasing restlessness in the modern society arises from the loss of touch with Nature.

In coming into touch with Nature,

we develop what
is called, the planet
consciousness. Children need to have it to know how the ecosystem operates. Fortunately many
curriculum designers have identified the needs. Subjects like science, geography, and social studies area
in both primary and secondary amply provide knowledge about the planet.
Peace education helps
internalization of such knowledge, through bringing in the affective learning dimension.

Our present era is crucially decisive about the future of Mother Earth. Mankind had been living on earth
at least for the last six million years.
They built many
civilizations on various parts of the earth. The striking fact about the ancient civilizations was that they
were never posed threats to the earth. But within the short existence of the modern civilization for the
last twenty- seven decades, _say from 1830 with the beginning of the Industrial Revolution up to the
present, the earth has been threatened with damage, pollution and destruction as never before.
Unless we stop this, the future of the earth is
at great risk.

Educating to care for the planet

Children need to understand the consequences of damages we do to the earth because they are the
future citizens. In fact children can be crusaders to save the earth. To quote only a few problems
affecting the earth:

• Global warming
• Epidemics/pandemics
• Ever increasing poverty
• Population growth
• Famines, cyclones
• Loss of forest
• Soil erosion
• Extinction of species
• Scarcity of drinking water
• Chemical poisoning of fertile soil
• Toxic wastes

Over fishing Air pollution

People accept the need to stop all this destruction: However, when it comes to action they are
indifferent. The damaging is continuing as ever year-by-year.
Educationally, raising awareness in
children should be reinforced through providing an opportunity to get into action.
Participation in action-oriented projects strengthens attitudes.
Schools have to
organize environmental projects as co-curricular activities. Here we should not forget the fact that
children are capable of changing the world in their own ways.

We are capable
A teacher from a public school in Colombo, Sri Lanka reports:
"I did a small classroom activity on the caring for the earth. A few days later I heard how one of my
students had stopped his destructive habit. The parents leave home to their offices with the child. On
the way there is a preserved birds sanctuary land
Many people bring their home garbage in bags, stop cars and throw them away to the preserved land.
On the following morning the child protested against their parent's habit"

Lesson 2
Becoming an instrument of piece

INTRODUCTION
A. "DISCOVER PEACE"
The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt with
the heart.
-Helen keller

Patricia Mische
(2000)
explains
that the transformation that we should seek should not only be the transformation of our society, but
also the transformation of our spirit because the inner transformation inspires the outer work. She
concludes that the
"inner and outer transformations are inseparable parts of one whole". This perspective is repeated
many times over in both the secular and faith-based peace literature. There is a growing consensus that,
indeed, there is an intimate connection between our inner state and what we do in our outer spheres.
This consistency is the foundation of being a fully integrated person.

Abstraction

Understanding the Concept

The statement in the preamble of the UNESCO's
Constitution, "Since war begins in the minds of men, it is in the minds of men that the defenses of peace
must be created"provides a guiding principle for this theme. Learning to BE means to learn to live
peacefully with oneself. Peace can be experienced within ourselves. Inner peace arises out of intrinsic
inner richness such as compassion, spiritual joy and wisdom. The significance O beingness is the state of
mind where a person experiences the joy of whole some living.

Peace as Resolution of Inner Conflict At the superficial level of mind, inner peace can be experienced
through resolution of psychological conflict. Conflicts can be either external or internal. In fact most of
our conflicts are internal, i.e. within ourselves.
Various psychologists have described the nature of inner conflict. According to Sigmund Freud, the mind
is a battlefield where the life instinct is in conflict with the death instinct and in the clashes with super
consciousness and soon.
Further, Kurt Lewin showed that we have three basic types of inner conflicts. They are:

1. Approach - approach conflict

In this type of conflict a person is caught in between two equally attractive objectives out of which he
can select only one. An example would be the choice between two equally attractive jobs.
2. Avoidance - avoidance conflict
Here the person tries to avoid two equally undesirable objectives where he is forced by circumstances to
select one other than
-
selecting one. Say that a person gets two jobs, which are equally unattractive. But under the
circumstances he is pressed to select one.
3. Approach - negative conflict
In this type a person is both attracted and repulsed by the same objective. He wants something for a
certain reason and at the same time he does not want it for some
other reason.

Erik Ericks on postulates that man's psychological growth results from the healthy resolution of inner
conflicts.
According to him in each growth stage man is confronted with a basic psychological conflict. Inability to
resolve that inner conflict blocks his further growth and even leads to pervasive behavior. This is has
been proven by the studies on many criminals and terrorists. Some of them had been led to adopt
violent ways of life as a result of the inability to resolve their inner conflicts such as deep hurts
experienced during childhood.
It is evident that a person who is unable to live with himself in peace cannot live in peace with others.
How can we help children to resolve their inner conflicts?

Self-Knowledge
"To resolve one's Inner problems, first of all one has
110
learn to look within and
observe how the mind works. The problems distressing the mind have to be perceived and understood.
The more you understand
yourself the more you mature psychologically.
Helping children to look within and understand the self is an important life skill.
The gravity of this need in education is evident by the kind of immature acts people commit throughout
the world. Much disruptive behavior of people arise out of their unresolved deep inner conflicts.
Obviously one who cannot live in peace with oneself cannot live in peace with others.

Spiritual needs

This theme addresses our spiritual needs. By spirituality we do not mean here being religious in the
conventional sense.
Peace in one's life arises from the deep human spirit that underlies all faiths. Peace education deals with
the depth of the human mind. Touching the seat of spirituality is necessary. Here by spirituality we
mean that essence rooted in man, which seeks for fulfillment through expressing and experiencing
goodness in the highest degree.
It drives us to do good, be kind, search for the true meaning and values lying deep within us. The present
education has failed even to recognize children's basic needs.
Children's spiritual needs are delicate and strong. They want to experience joy, beauty, love, warmth,
kindness and wonder. They want to feel good. Education should cater for these children's spiritual
needs. Depriving them of such needs surely withholds the blooming of their wholesome personalities.
Inner peace is not only resolution of psychological conflicts. All religions teach that there is still deep
peace within us. As a matter of fact all of us know that when the mind calms down a serene feeling of
joy and peace begins to unfold within us.
One of the effective ways of realizing the peace within is meditation as taught in all religions. However
here we take it not as religious practice, attached to any particular belief system but as an open mental
activity.
The research findings show that meditation develops mental sanity, releases stress and improves
creativity and insight. A meditation may be either tranquilizing or insight-producing. One can practice
tranquilizing meditation by sitting still and concentrating on breathing in and out.

Self-image is also a construct of imagination. It is how one imagines one's own self. Once a self-image is
built, the person tries to live up to it whether it is negative or positive. Teachers have to help children to
build positive self-images, not only by right appraisals but also by encouraging, providing stimulation and
opportunities to express themselves.
Through meditations, soul appealing and meaningful imaginary experiences could be evoked in children
using their natural sense of wonder, ourlosity and beauty. Meditation in the conventional sense is an act
of awakening to reality or truth. But children have come to reality walking through their veil of
imagination. For them it is the stepping-stone to attain reality. Various forms of meditation for children
could be developed to use in the classroom as educational tools.
Practicing Awareness
Meditation in true sense is an act of establishing awareness, i.e. being aware The synonyms for
awareness are being alert, mindful, attentive, ete. It is basically a survival life skill. Take for instance, the
function of awareness in an act of crossing a busy road. A moment loss of it may take away one's life.
Thus awareness is a basic function of intelligence. We have to be trained in being aware of dangers in
our surroundings. Be it home, school, playground or road. Awareness brings self-control, composure and
sharpening of attention.
The second level of awareness is being mindful of the movement of the body, i.e. how you walk, sit, eat,
etc. It develops one's sensitiveness towards the body.
The third level is being mindful of the activity of the mind, That is when you are angry know that you are
angry, when you are confused know that you are confused. This is a subtle level of awareness.
Awareness helps us to overcome an inherent weakness of the human mind. We are inclined to be
carried away by our own desire, anger and illusion. Most of the inner conflicts arise out of the lack of
self-understanding.
Varied Wavs on How to Meditate:
Take the class out to an open air or a quiet place. Let them sit quietly and listen to the sounds in the
environment. This helps to develop awareness towards the surroundings.
• Make them sit quietly and repeat in mind "I am a peaceful soul."
• Watch a tree with a silent mind
• Sit quietly and concentrate on breathing in and out. Look at a flower and concentrate on it.
• Imagine a beautiful natural scene.
• Imagine a trip in a strange land or garden
• Sit quietly and experience the feeling of a noble human quality, such as kindness and joy.
Apart from experiencing inner calm and beauty of imagination, meditation opens the door to
understanding one's own thought process. It is this self-knowledge that brings emotional maturity in us.
As educators we have to find effective methods of helping children to understand themselves better.
(Balasooriya, 2001)

Lesson 2-B
Resolve conflict non violently

INTRODUCTION
Being willing to resolve a problem does not mean you arent right. It means you give up making the other
person wrong, by wiping the slate clean and make a fresh start with each other.
-Helena Cornelius and Shoshana Faire

Abstraction

Conflict is everywhere. It is a part of life. In fact, it is on the increase in our time. This is because of the
increasing individual differences and diversification of the society.

On the other hand, competition in economic, political and other fields is intensifying. With the
increasing population, physical space and resources are getting restricted. In such a background, we
have to learn how to live amidst conflict, handle and resolve them constructively. This theme
concentrates on educating children in conflict resolution. We can begin the discussion by attempting to
understand its nature.

Definition
How do you respond to the question
"What is a conflict?" You might say it is:
• a difference of opinion,
• a clash of wants,
• a situation that arises from a disagreement,
between two persons or several persons,
• a broken relationship and
• a vicious competition against one another.

It is true that conflict arises from a difference of opinion. Inability to resolve conflict at the beginning
leads to complication and intensification.
In the process of escalation of conflict your friend, colleague or neighbor with whom you have the
disagreement, turns gradually to be your rival, opponent, antagonist and finally the enemy. The initial
open and friendly situation that was there, at the beginning, becomes gradually tense and hostile.

Causes
Why do people get into conflicts?
It is because of the other person's way of behavior. When two or more people are at conflict their
interests may be concerned with:
• commodities at stake, e.g. object, land, money;
• opportunities at stake, e.g. opportunity for gain, privileges;
• principles and values at stake, e.g. religious beliefs, ideologies, cultural values;
territory at stake, e.g. house, land, physical space, road, status and
• relationship at stake, e.g. promise, personality clashes.
trust,
You can take any conflict you know and identify the interest perceived at stake by the parties. It may be
one interest or combination of several interests. Ross Stinger (1967) defines conflict as "a situation in
which two or more human beings desire goals, to which they perceive as being obtainable by one or the
other but
not both."

According to the definition, a conflict is made of three components. They are:

• Situation where the conflicting parties view each other as competitors, or having mutually competitive
interests or wants;
• Attitudes, e.g. leading to hostility and frustration and
• Behavior, e.g. threatening, descriptive, egoistic, opposing, withdrawing acts.
This model of conflict is simple and 1981) useful in analyzing a conflict. (Michell 1981)

Can conflicts be constructive?

As we said earlier, experiencing a conflict is unpleasant because of the tense feelings it produces.
Intensive conflicts are associated with a flood of anxiety, confusion, suffering and negative emotions.
However, this state of mind can be transformed into a positive state with a sense of challenge, efficiency
and strength. It depends on the way you look at the conflict. If you look at it from a constructive
attitude, then you fell positive.
To have a positive attitude towards a conflict is to take it as a challenge and opportunity for
development and self-correction. Next time you are confronted with a conflict, ask
e
yourself. What are the opportunities it can bring for me? How can I develop myself through this
situation? What is the learning it
brings for me?

Conflict become destructive simply because of the lack of skills in handling them. If they are handled
properly towards positive results, it will bring growth and renewed relationship, sense of fun and self-
confidence. Recall a conflict you have resolved constructively. Destructive conflict occurs when the value
of the conflict is not understood and when you react with negative emotions to it.

In a constructive approach to conflict resolution:

• Control vour negative emotions.

• Listen actively.
Speak efficiently.
.
Deal with the other, as a person with a problem, need and human reaction.
• Face the issue directly and precisely.
• Separate the problem from the person and adopt a problem-solving approach.
• Show understanding and be understood.
• Be willing to change your position in face of facts and reason.
. Use a sense of humor.
• Generate alternatives acceptable to both you and the other person.
• Speak to the point.
• Use interpersonal skills.
• Be persistent.

Steps in Conflict Resolution

Our general tendency when confronted with a conflict is to attempt to win, defeating the other. This
pushes the other person also to adopt the same approach. As a consequence a destructive competition
emerges out of the situation.
There are four possible solutions to any conflict. Let's name the two parties in a conflict as A and
B. The possibilities are:

It is easy to understand possibilities of (1) and (2) when one person wins, by defeating the other. In. the
third possibility both parties are defeated. An example for it would be a situation in an organization
where two officers assault each other and as a result both of them get sacked. The ideal solution is the
fourth possibility where both parties win. That means they resolve the problem in such a way, that both
are satisfied. But that does not necessarily mean you win on your own the predetermined wishful way.
In the course of negotiation for solving the problem each party has to give up certain things in order to
gain other things. Only then can they arrive at a common ground. The conflicting parties should co-
operate with each other by adjusting their positions to reach a solution, satisfactory for both of them.
In a conflict, the solution is reached by undergoing three basic stages:

1. Confrontation
2. Negotiation
3. Implementation
Let us see the way to work towards a satisfactory solution through the three stages.
Confrontation is the stage when the difference surfaces. As a consequence, the parties feel disturbed
and are even threatened in their position.

However it is easy to discuss the problem openly at this initial stage. In this stage they can:
1. Define the problem in terms of needs of the people involved.

In this context, it is important to know the meaning of the word need'. At the core of any conflict lie the
needs of the conflicting parties. In fact a conflict is a two or more sets of needs pulling in different
directions. Whenever a person finds that his need is threatened, the natural reaction is to be defensive.
Fear is inbuilt in defense. Thus need and fear go together.
One day I burst into anger with the station master; when he announced that the train was delayed. It
was the first day of my examination. Instantly fear arose in me that the delay of the train might lead to
failure in the examination.
Every need generates a fear of possible loss. To understand a conflict, you have to identify the
underlying needs and fears of the others as well as your own. However people's needs are mostly
covered up by their wants. A want is different from a need. A want is born out of desire. In other words,
a want is a wishful intention, whereas a need is real, in the sense that you can't survive without it.
For instance:

1% are thirsty, and you get angry with the village shopkeeper for not having your particular brand of
sweetened drink. in this instance what is your need? In fact, your real need is water to quench thirst.
In the above situation you have confused want with need. The implication for conflict resolution here is
not to get upset by people's demands or their wants.
See through their wants and identify the needs underlying them. Each person in conflict has to identify
one's own needs as well as the other's needs. For this you have to avoid blaming and use such
expressions like:
"What I need here is..
• "I feel upset when you be have this way, because
• "Tell me what your real need is?"

2. Agree with the definition of the problem with the other party
A conflict cannot be resolved unless the parties come to a common definition of their problem. For
instance, they should agree to what the exact problem is. For example, in a conflict with someone, I say
one thing and the other says another thing as to what the conflict is. Then we cannot solve it. This
situation is obvious in any ongoing conflict around you.
Negotiation is the process of reaching a common and fair agreement on a solution to a problem
affecting two or more parties.
In negotiating you ask questions for getting to know the problem from the other's side and trying to
explain your side. Having thus established the understanding both of you try to find a win-win solution.
In negotiating you ask questions to steer the negotiation on the right track. You may seek specific
clarifications on the issues and the needs of the other person.

Active listening is an important skill

' in negotiation. Active listening involves giving your full attention to what the other person is saying,
feeding back, encouraging deeper probing, supporting the other person's attempt to find solutions and
summarizing what is said.
3. Brain storm possible solutions for both.
Find with the other, the alternative solutions extensively to the problem. Don't get fixed to your position
demanding the only way you want to solve the conflict.
Take away the other person also from his fixed position by exploration of alternatives solutions, which
are agreeable to both parties.

4. Select the best solution for both.

Taking the alternative solutions one by one which the parties can evaluate them eliminating those that
they consider unacceptable. The evaluation of alternatives goes until they come to one alternative most
agreeable to both. Implementation is the final stage.
5. Implement solution.
This means planning, setting agreed time target and acting according to the agreed term of the solution.
6. Evaluate implementation.
Find out how it works in practice and how people feel about the solution. Perhaps the parties may need
some adjustments as the implementation takes place and the original problem might change. However,
if the parties are not satisfied as things go they can restart negotiation.

In the procedure of conflict resolution,

you need skills in
active listening,
assertiveness,
conflict analysis and
negotiation. Though the above sequence of steps seems formal, in a practical situation they may be
mixed. However, to reach a solution in this manner both parties need to be honest, respectful to each
other on an equal power basis. They must be willing to arrive at a consensus and co-operate with each
other in finding a satisfactory solution.

Children's world of conflict

children are not free from conflict. A teacher needs to know the nature and types of conflicts that
children have. In helping them to learn conflict resolution the teacher can take examples and cases from
their conflicts.
Conflicts at homes
• Jealousies among the brothers and sisters, by:
- comparing with each other on what they get from parents.
- Problems of equal treatment, privileges and
- Personal rights.
- Problems arising from carrying out their responsibilities.
• Inability to deal with anger, negative comments violence
• Deprivation of freedom to play, meet friends and express oneself.
• Deprivation of parents, love.
Deprivation of physiological needs, e.g. food, proper shelter, owing to low income.
Problems with elder brothers or bigger kids in the neighborhood.
• Drunkenness of father disturbing peace at home
• Instance of child abuse, e.g. severe punishment.
• Separation of parents.
*False acousations.
• Name calling
• Being snubbed / being teased
• False accusations
• Fear of being unprepared, e.g. not having a pencil, not ready with homework, not having read the
lesson
• Misunderstanding by teachers.
*Negative remarks by teachers. Being cheated by a peer
• Being deprived of opportunity to participate in activities that the child likes
• Inability to buy things that the school requests
• Physiological problems, e.g. hunger, low energy, Exclusion by peers

The classroom should have open sessions where students can freely discuss and express their conflicts
and problems. Unfortunately the traditional school is too busy to take into consideration this lively
aspect of children’s growth.(balasooriya 2001)

Lesson 3-A
Call for Filipino patriotism

INTRODUCTION
A. "RESPECT FOR HUMAN DIGNITY"
A landmark. papal. encyclical, Pacem in Terris, has also declared that. peace would be built if citizens
"apply themselves seriously to respecting the rights of others and discharging their own duties" (Pope
John XXIII, 1963). In Islam, it is believed that all human beings have the right to life at conception, and
after birth, a right to full opportunities to lead a rewärding and satisfying life (Mahmood-Abedin, in
Mische and Merkling (eds.), 2001).

Abstraction

Understanding the Concept

The tradition of human rights concepts is as old as human civilization.
Every society has varying norms to protect human life and dignity. Great religions strengthen the
traditions.
Human rights can be broadly defined as those rights which human beings are entitled to which no one
can deprive them of. They are a set of guarantees that ensure not only living but also those basic
conditions to live with dignity as a human being. They are designed to protect lindividuals from the
threat to life and human dignity with the growth of the power of states, complexity and stratification of
the society, such a set of guarantees was necessary.

The Declaration of the Universal

Human Rights by the United Nations Organization is a moral victory of mankind as a whole in recent
times. It is the culmination of the moral values that all religions advocated from the beginning of history.
Now for the first time in history the whole world has accepted a set of rights applied to every human
being, irrespective of nationality, religion, sex, social status, occupation, wealth, property, or any other
differentiating ethnic, cultural, or social characteristic.
The declaration
begins with the article:
"All human beings are born free and equal indignity and rights. They are endowed with reason and
conscience and should act towards one another in a spirit of brotherhood.

The purpose of the declaration is obviously to provide a global foundation to protect human dignity. It
subsequently initiated various States to adopt and enlarge the principles of human rights in their
Constitutions. Many codes of rights, like African Charteron Human and People's Rights, European
Convention on Human Rights and American Declaration of Rights and Duties of Man sprang up following
it. The declaration also led to include principles of human rights into various sections of public laws, such
as race equality, sex discrimination, and court procedures. The declaration covers right to life, liberty
and security of person. Slavery, torture, cruel punishment, arbitrary arrest and detention and invasion of
privacy and family are banned. Due process of law is guaranteed using such principles as
"innocent until proved guilty." Freedom of thought and speech, conscience. and religious belief are i
accepted. Private ownership of property, freedom of movement, right to employment, health and
education are also guaranteed.

The Declaration covers such major areas like survival, dignity, political action, culture, and economic and
social rights.
However the convention in the present form may not be perfect according to certain cultural
perspectives because of the strong Western cultural influence in their make. At least, it has got to be
accepted as a st of minimum moral standards required by
all cultures.
Developing consciousness of rights is important in that they are strong factors in peace. Most of the
conflicts, arise from violation of human rights. Mere acceptance of the rights nationally or
internationally alone is not sufficient.
The political, cultural and economic diversities of the globe are so complex and therefore there is a need
to have determined action to make human rights a reality in the societies. It is the responsibility of every
citizen, government and civil organization to secure them.

Education of Human Rights

Schools have the responsibility to educate the next generation on human rights and inculcate the basic
values embedded in there. Although many curricula have it as a unit generally it is taught only at the
cognitive level. Such academic learning has little impact on the actual behavior. Merely memorizing the
articles in the convention does not go far. What is necessary is to help learning them in a manner, that
the respect for human dignity is internalized and be a part of one's character. We have yet to search for
effective methods of teaching human rights.
One of the critiques of the present approach to teaching rights is that it ignores the responsibility side.
In the West we see the over stress for the rights which has led to imbalance of civic consciousness and
human relationships. Campaigns that propagate human rights rarely speak about duties that go with
them. Therefore the message that people get is "fight for your rights; neglect your duties." In the Orient
the emphasis is always given to one's duties before rights.
There is an interesting Buddhist discourse called Sigalowada Sutta, which reflects the Oriental attitude to
rights. Therein the Buddha explains that parents are bound to do their rightful to children when children
perform their duties to parents. Masters are bound to do their rightful to workers when they perform
their duties to masters. One has to earn one's rights by performing the duties.
They are inseparable as the two sides of the same coin.

Children, especially in primary grades, may find it difficult to grasp the concepts involved in human
rights. Their ability to understand abstract concepts like rights, freedom is yet to develop. Learning
human rights should begin with understanding them in daily experiences of the personal life of children.
For instance:

• Standing in a queue for one's turn

• Keeping promises
• Returning a debt in time
• Helping the injured and sick
• Keeping the public places clean
• Not encroaching on others' property
Sharing experiences of such familiar situations are helpful. (Balasooriya, 2001)
individual introspection under such circumstances is encouraged. The teacher opens up students h
discuss, share their feelings and thoughts. The experiences are interpreted and judged by the principles
of human rights, equality and justice. The basic approach adopted here is to develop sensitivity to deep
suffering experienced by human beings in situations where their natural rights are deprived. For
instance, the feelings of being socially rejected are recognized. Along with the development of affective
feelings of deprivation students begin to broaden their consciousness and change their attitudes
towards the necessity of respecting and protecting human dignity. Building on that issue of the rights of
women, children, minorities, religious sects, refugees and various other social groups could be
discussed. The notion of rights needs to be extended to the animals and from there to Nature as well.
Peace recognizes and respects life in every form.
As you move forward, you begin to see every right arises from a basic human need. For example, the
right to education has that education is a need in man. Thus denying him an education is violating a
right. All violations of human rights are violent acts, because they involve depriving a person from
fulfilling his need.
Taken as a whole, all the rights as expressed in the articles, provide the foundation for democracy.
In short, democracy is the governance that ensures human rights. Democracy is the process of ensuring
and securing human rights. It is basically a conflict resolution process. Peace arises from the proper
functioning of democracy. In other words, peace in a country is the product of democracy.
(Balasooriya, 2001)

Lesson 3-B
Building patriotic community

INTRODUCTION
We can make the new world if we want We can make the new world if we all try What we do is to make
it show And the old world's got to go We can make the new world and we will
- From a song by P.J. Hoffman

ABSTRACTION
This theme aims at developing knowledge, attitudes and skills for active and responsible citizenship.
Education is accountable to produce good citizens for both the country and the world. Schools can easily
forget this obligation in their competition for examination results or daily organizational maintenance
efforts.

Are schools genuinely

concerned
for
developing students citizenship? Does that concern reflect in the behavior of our youth?
We often hear people saying, that the present youth lack interest in. issues of their own country. The
general immaturity into social problems is reflected by their values system.
In some countries terrorism thrives on this lack of informed citizenship of the youth.
School has a heavy responsibility to develop their students' civic attitudes. For this, first of all schools
should set examples in being interested in contemporary social issues, in preference to' keeping up with
the long prevailing tradition distancing themselves from the social reality. Schools teach children the
past as history but are somewhat blind to the present.

Citizenship attitude building

Being a citizen involves understanding one's role as a member of the community or nation and acting
with responsibility.
A social role is built upon a certain set of attitudes. Attitudes are predispositions to behavior. Education
is accountable to society to produce good citizens. The word citizen is basically a political term. It is the
politics in the global context. Thus a good citizen thinks globally and acts. locally. Citizenship need not
always be interpreted in a parochial narrow sense as blind obedience to the immediate political forces.
In promoting citizenship a school needs a clear model of it both in terms of local and global needs. With
that picture in mind they have to draw education programs within the curriculum. Peace education
basically attempts developing peaceful attitudes in the future citizen. Good citizenship is built upon the
following attitudes anywhere in the world.
1. Patriotism
is the ground on which
citizenship and democracy are based. A person is obliged to perform his duties

because of his love dasic*a communi been tountry. It is a basic attachment anion beyond the present
interest
net government in power. In it there, general willingness to co-operate with the nation's effort for
advancement.
2. Productivity is the degree of contribution
2 citizen makes towards the development of one's society. A good citizen does not want to be a burden
on his people. He or she thinks in terms of "What can I give to the country?" not in terms of "What can I
get from the country?"

3. Civic responsibility is the consciousness of one's duties towards the society in day. to-day life as well
in long-term perspective, e.g. being informed about the current political and other issues, abstaining
from disturbing the peace of the neighborhood, protection of public property, participation in
community building activities.
4. Interest in contemporary community, national and global issues citizen takes interest to seek
information on the issues affecting his or her society at every level. Today there is a global tendency
developing towards individualism.
One of the
seeming dysfunctions of this tendency is selfishness, which drives people to pay less care or no care to
social issues and duties. Elders often criticize the youth as being increasingly disinterested in the
problems of their society.
5. Active participation In community bullding a citizen is bound by duty to participate actively in
community building according to his or her best capacities. The Convention on the Rights of the Child
lays great stress on the need of recognizing children's right to participate in community life and
development through seeking information, expressing views and opinions through equal access to
opportunity for personal development and cultural activities and education.
Active participation in community building and environmental protection is the most effective way of
developing children's attitudes and interests on
responsible citizenship.

a cultura citizen is a good citizen is a oultured person in than he is disciplined by the rich qualities at his
culture as well as the global culture. Educationally speaking, children at the beginning need to be
nurtured and disciplined by their own cultures. As they grow up they should be exposed to other
cultures as well so that they can appreciate and learn from them to be world citizens.
7. Obedience to law A citizen is necessarily one who abides by the law of his country. Here by law we
mean the established code of law. Justice is the source of rightful law. However a citizen tries to rectify
laws when they happen to be unjust as it happens sometimes. Schools need to develop law
consciousness in children. It is a striking fact that many school syllabi are silent about social justice and
the civic laws.

8. National coherence
A citizen living in a multicultural society preserves the national unity by respecting and giving due
recognition and rights to all the sectors of people in spite of their differences of ethnicity, language,
religion and class. Social diversity has to be viewed as an opportunity of social and cultural enrichment.
Today many countries are becoming plural societies.
Education is considered
An effective means of promoting national harmony.
To meet this need teachers have to be equipped to respond to ethnic and cultural diversities of students
in schools. The curriculum has to be reconsidered in the light of multicultural needs.

9. Simple living
The need for simple living has never been felt in such a degree before as it is now. All the commercial
forces press us to buy their products. They create new needs. In us through their strong machinery of
propaganda. The consequence is the ever-growing consumerist society that wastes natural resources in
the production of unnecessary goods only to satisfy the greed of people. They pollute the environment
both during the process of productions and after their use, as heaps of garbage. Thus simple living is
nature-friendly in every way. To live simply is. to lead a life, outwardly, poor but inwardly rich.

10. Democracy is interpreted in different forms in different countries. However the basic features in
democracy are freedom of speech, public participation in governance through representatives,
tolerance of differences and respect for human rights. In addition, a democracy can be evaluated by the
degree of public confidence, voluntary compliance with the law, party activism, voluntary organization,
activism, and political discussion. In a country, democracy emerges essentially from the ways people
adopt in their lifestyle and administration of social institutes. For instance, children learn democracy by
the way home, school and classroom are managed. (Balasooriya, 2001)

MODULE 4
THE GMRC TEACHER AS GOD’S MASTERPIECE

LESSON 1
FAITH AS INNER SOURCE OF HOPE