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Extensive research has revealed that maintaining the unity of a family, even in the face of parental
disagreements, is often more advantageous for children compared to the alternative of divorce. This
conclusion emerges from studies that illustrate the adverse effects of divorce on children, such as
diminished access to essential resources, heightened emotional distress, and a propensity towards
experiencing more severe forms of parenting. Notably, these consequences culminate in the deterioration
of a child's academic performance.
Contrary to the popular notion that a harmonious alternative to an unhappy marriage is divorce, research
asserts that two parents who can effectively coexist in a low-conflict marriage offer a more constructive
environment for children. Divorce often incites lasting tension in children, which may persist well into
their adulthood. This highlights the stark reality that both detrimental and beneficial divorce scenarios
can be more detrimental to children's well-being than preserving the family unit.
Therefore, it is prudent to reconsider societal attitudes toward divorce, advocating instead for measures
that elevate the quality of marriages. Promoting values of virtue and self-restraint within the context of
marriage becomes instrumental in achieving this objective. Furthermore, the prevalence of pre-marital
cohabitation as a notable precursor to divorce underlines the necessity of discouraging such
arrangements.
The vitality and robustness of a nation are intrinsically linked to the stability of the marriages within it.
Consequently, policymakers and society at large should prioritize initiatives that foster resilient, healthy
marriages as they lay the foundation for societal stability.
The cornerstone of this argument lies in the conviction that happy and stable marriages among parents
are indispensable for the holistic development of children. Notably, children growing up in single-parent
households face an elevated risk of encountering poverty, behavioral issues, and discontinuation of their
education. This risk becomes even more pronounced when two-parent households undergo separation or
divorce. It is therefore imperative for couples to actively address their issues and consider seeking
marriage counseling to mitigate these risks. The welfare of children, who represent the future of the
community, hinges on the success of their parents in preserving their family structure.
ESSAY AND EXTRA INFORMATION
An international study by Radboud Universiteit Nijmegen found that parental divorce has more
far-reaching consequences than parental death. It pointed out that children who lose a parent through
divorce face challenges similar to those who lose a parent through death, with an emphasis on the greater
difficulties faced by children of divorce. This highlights the complex emotional and psychological impact
on such children, emphasizing the importance of providing comprehensive support and understanding in
these situations.
Extensive research underscores the advantages of preserving family unity, even in the face of parental
disagreements, over the alternative of divorce. This conclusion is based on studies revealing the
detrimental effects of divorce on children, including reduced access to essential resources, heightened
emotional distress, a susceptibility to more severe forms of parenting, and ultimately, a decline in
academic performance. Additionally, these problems manifest as difficulties in handling relationships and
conflict, diminished social skills, and a pervasive weakening impact on various societal institutions, as
concluded by the research.
Divorce can be financially burdensome, and in our country, it's not legally recognized. Instead, the closest
alternative is pursuing an annulment, a legal process that declares a marriage null and void as if it never
existed.
Many persistent factors play a role in the breakdown of second or third marriages, underscoring an
increased probability of marital instability following the initial union. These factors can include issues
like communication problems, financial strain, blended family dynamics, and emotional baggage from
previous relationships, all of which can challenge the success of subsequent marriages.
Following a divorce, financial struggles tend to be a shared experience for both parties. This occurs as
they navigate the financial fallout, which may involve the division of assets, the establishment of separate
households, and, in many cases, the added financial burden of supporting two separate households. These
challenges can have a profound impact on their financial well-being and require adjustments to their
lifestyle and budgeting to achieve stability once more.
Divorce frequently highlights inherent gender disparities, as it tends to impact one party more
significantly than the other, particularly in areas like alimony arrangements, child custody decisions, and
the distribution of marital assets. This underscores the importance of reforming divorce procedures to
ensure a fairer and more equitable resolution for both parties involved.
PRIOR RESEARCH
The pejorative argument has always been that the Philippines is the only country in the world — aside
from the Vatican — that doesn’t allow for divorce. The bandwagon fallacy should therefore be recognized
for what it is and truth — as a wise man once said — is never decided by majority opinion.
• "Recent research contradicts the argument that divorce is better for children than seeing their parents
fight. According to one study, divorce has a larger negative impact on children than even parental death.
This is because divorce often leads to reduced resources and less contact with the non-resident parent,
resulting in harsher parenting and lower educational attainment for the children."
Thus, divorce is a greater loss than death to families, having long-term consequences on children's
educational achievement.
There are two significant arguments made by pro-divorce advocates which are effectively debunked by
scientific studies. One is that children are better off with their parents divorcing rather than seeing them
constantly arguing. Such is not true. Researchers from Radboud Universiteit Nijmegen, culling data from
17 countries, saw parental divorce having a larger negative impact than even parental death.
Thus, “parental death and divorce may not be equally harmful to all children’s educational attainment.
Although both experiences lead to family stress, due to either the loss of a parent or conflict between
parents, the reduction of resources may be less profound for children who face parental death. This is
because, in families where a parent has died, children often receive support from extended family
members and friends of the deceased parent, who take over some parenting duties and support children’s
educational attainment. Children of divorced parents, however, tend to have much less contact with their
nonresident parent, as well as that parent’s family and friends over time, providing less opportunity to
compensate for the loss in parental resources and support.
Furthermore, “the emotional and relational pain caused by divorce can lead to a parenting style that is
harsher, less consistent, and less involved, which may negatively affect children’s educational
performance.”
• "A better situation for children than an unhappy marriage is two parents that get along. Divorce can
also be a bad choice. Children in a low-conflict marriage are negatively impacted by divorce, and they
experience lasting tension that may last even into adulthood. Both bad and good divorce situations are
worse than staying together for children."
The foregoing essentially substantiates previous studies putting the lie to the myth that divorce is a
positive alternative for children. While children in quite high-conflict homes may benefit by being
removed from that environment (not necessarily through a divorce), the situation of children in
lower-conflict marriages (of which two-thirds of divorces are of this type) can get much worse following a
divorce.
Furthermore, such children experience lasting tension even after their parents’ divorce, particularly
because of increasing differences in parental values and ideas. The point: children of even so-called “good
divorces” fared worse emotionally than children who grew up in unhappy but “low-conflict” marriages.
• "Divorce may seem like a solution for married couples who are unhappy, but not only is divorce not a
guarantee for happiness, but studies have shown that 86% of unhappy couples do not engage in violence
and that 93% of unhappy couples who don't divorce end up happily married within 5 years. Instead of
divorce, couples should work on themselves and improve their marriage."
This leads us to the second argument, which is that divorce is a good remedy for unhappy couples. Again
not true. A 2002 study found the following profound insights:
• Unhappily married adults who divorced were no happier than unhappily married adults who stayed
married;
• Divorce did not reduce symptoms of depression for unhappily married adults or raise self-esteem, on
average, compared to unhappy spouses who stayed married;
• Unhappy marriages were less common than unhappy spouses;
• Staying married did not typically trap unhappy spouses in violent relationships. Eighty-six percent of
unhappily married adults reported no violence in their relationship (including 77% of unhappy spouses
who later divorced or separated); 93% of unhappy spouses who avoided divorce reported no violence in
their marriage five years later.
But the most important finding is this: Two out of three unhappily married adults who avoided divorce or
separation ended up happily married five years later. Just one out of five unhappy spouses who divorced or
separated had happily remarried in the same period.
Another equally important finding: The kinds of marital troubles that lead to divorce cannot be sharply
distinguished from marital troubles that other spouses overcome. Many marriages that experience serious
problems survive and eventually prosper.
• "Children are better off with married parents because studies have repeatedly shown that couples who
stay together and work through their problems are happier later on. Children who grow up without a
father are more likely to commit crime, drop out of school, and end up in prison."
Such corroborates previous studies showing that “children benefit if parents can stay together and work
out their problems rather than get a divorce.” Read this alongside research showing that if couples only
stick together, reform themselves, and pull through, they’ll find themselves much happier later on.
Hence, this famous passage: “We know the statistics — that children who grow up without a father are
five times more likely to live in poverty and commit crime; nine times more likely to drop out of schools
and 20 times more likely to end up in prison. They are more likely to have behavioral problems, run away
from home, or become teenage parents themselves. And the foundations of our community are weaker
because of it.”
• "Rather than promoting divorce, we should look to increase the quality of marriages. The promotion of
virtue and self-restraint are steps towards this goal.
Premarital cohabitation is a significant risk factor for divorce. This indicates that we should discourage it.
The stability of a country is entirely dependent on the stability of marriages in it. Therefore, greater
thought should be put towards ensuring strong, healthy marriages."
Rather than divorce, the better policy is to look for ways to raise the quality of marriages. Many divorces
being contemplated are simply cases of one spouse self-indulgently wanting to “self-actualize” even
though the marriage or the family is not undergoing any problem whatsoever. The promotion of virtue
and encouragement leading away from self-centeredness is a good step forward.
The other is to discourage premarital cohabitation. Stanford’s Michael J. Rosenfeld and Katharina Roesler
reaffirm that premarital cohabitation remains a significant risk factor for divorce: “The results show that
in the first year of marriages, couples who cohabitate before marriage have a lower marital dissolution
rate than couples who did not cohabit before marriage, a difference that may be due to the practical
experience of cohabitation, as couples who have cohabited learned to adapt to each other. We find that
the association between marital dissolution and premarital cohabitation has not changed over time or
across marriage cohorts. The benefits of cohabitation experience in the first year of marriage has misled
scholars into thinking that the most recent marriage cohorts will not experience heightened marital
dissolution due to premarital cohabitation.”
To protect marriage is utterly crucial because — as data and common experience demonstrated — the
stability of a country is very much dependent on it. And it certainly deserves greater thought than merely
inanely saying the Philippines is only one of two countries without a divorce law.
• "Happy, stable marriages between parents are essential for a child's successful development. Children in
single-parent households are at a greater risk of poverty, behavioral problems, and dropping out of school.
These negative outcomes are even more likely in a two-parent household where parents are going through
a separation or divorce. It is crucial that couples work through their problems or seek marriage
counseling to avoid these problems. Children are the future of the community, and their success depends
on their parents' success."
OTHER SOURCES:
https://www.bworldonline.com/opinion/2022/04/07/441032/the-philippines-is-right-to-reject-divorce/