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Home Burial: by Robert Frost
Home Burial: by Robert Frost
SUMMARY
In this narrative poem, Frost describes a tense conversation between a rural husband and
wife whose child has recently died. As the poem opens, the wife is standing at the top of a
staircase looking at her child’s grave through the window. Her husband, at the bottom of the
stairs, does not understand what she is looking at or why she has suddenly become so
distressed. The wife resents her husband’s obliviousness (lack of awareness) and attempts to
leave the house. The husband begs her to stay and talk to him about her grief; he does not
understand why she is angry with him for manifesting his grief in a different way.
Inconsolable, the wife lashes out at him, convinced of his apathy toward their dead child.
The husband mildly accepts her anger, but the rift between them remains. She leaves the
house as he angrily threatens to drag her back by force.
ANALYSIS
FORM: this poem is a dramatic or pastoral lyric poem, using free-form dialogue rather than strict
rhythmic schemes. Frost generally uses five stressed syllables in each line and divides stanzas in terms
of lines of speech.
SPEAKERS: there are three speakers: the couple who have lost their child, and a narrator.
SETTING: a staircase with a door at the bottom and a window at the top – automatically sets up the
relationship between the characters. The wife stands at the top of the stairs, directly in front of the
window overlooking the graveyard, while the husband stands at the bottom of the stairs, looking up at
her.
SOUND OF THE POEM: This poem reads more like a play than a typical poem. It's chock full of
dialogue, which sounds like, well, people talking. And these people talk, for the most part, just as real
people would talk. We could easily believe that this is a really marriage, and it's really falling apart.
TITLE: the poem centers on the death and burial of this couple's first child. The
husband's family graveyard is within view of the window on their staircase, which is also
where the confrontation we witness in this poem takes place. However, the title could
also be read as the burial of a home, not a burial at a home. Because of the grief,
pain, and conflict caused by this couple's loss, their home together could figuratively be
dead and buried along with their child.
BACKGROUND: Robert Frost lost more than one child throughout his life. For this
reason, he knew what the experience of loosing a child felt. For this reason, he knew
the way in which people who loose a child feel. His firstborn son, Elliott, died of cholera
at the age of three. Later, his infant daughter died. Two more of his children died fairly
young, one by suicide.
INTERPRETATION
"He saw her from the bottom of the stairs / Before she saw him," implies what the
poem very soon states: that, knowing herself seen, she would have acted differently.
"She took a doubtful step" emphasizes the queer attraction or fascination that the fear
has for her; her departing step is not sure it should depart. Note the personification
here, too. Normally, people are doubtful, not the steps they take.
"What is it you see / From up there always—for I want to know," the word "always"
tells us that all this has gone on many times before, and that he has seen it—without
speaking of it—a number of times before. This is our first clue that the communication in
this relationship isn't the best. Not only does the man have to directly ask the woman
what's bothering her because she won't confide in him on her own, but his way of asking
is a bit egotistical.
"And her face changed from terrified to dull,“. For one thing, it seems like this woman
doesn't feel too comfy around this man. Maybe she's trying to hide her fear, or maybe
the fact that she doesn't feel kindly toward this guy simply overpowers her fear.
“He said to gain time: "What is it you see,“/Mounting until she cowered under him./"I
will find out now—you must tell me, dear.” The man in this poem repeats his question,
and asks the woman again what she's looking at. "He said to gain time"—to gain
time in which to think of the next thing to say, to gain time in which to get close to her
and gain the advantage of his physical nearness, his physical bulk. The line in the
middle is a little scary. He walks up the stairs towards her, which makes her cower, or
shrink back in fear.
“She let him look, sure that he wouldn't see,/Blind creature; and awhile he didn't
see”. She won't help him. If he's going to figure out what she's looking at, he's going
to have to do it himself. She lets him look where she had been gazing, confident that
he wouldn't be able to see what she saw. The man is called a "blind creature." The
narrator of the poem is telling us what the woman thinks about this man, using free
indirect discourse. The word "blind" refers to the man's perception, not his eyesight.
“The little graveyard where my people are!/So small the window frames the whole
of it./Not so much larger than a bedroom, is it?”. He's so used to this house, and to
the graveyard outside the window, that seeing this graveyard is just like seeing a
normal garden.
“But I understand: it is not the stones,/But the child's mound—””. It's a child's grave that is
really bothering the woman.
“Can't a man speak of his own child he's lost?”. The way he phrases the statement expresses
his frustration. He says this child is "his own," reminding his wife that it's his loss, too.
“I must get out of here. I must get air.” She seems to be talking to herself here on some level.
That's definitely the behavior of a flustered, upset person.
“"Amy! Don't go to someone else this time./Listen to me. I won't come down the stairs.“/He
sat and fixed his chin between his fists.” The name of the woman is revealed. The author uses
an image to describe how the man wants her partner to stay and talk to him.
“My words are nearly always an offense.” Again, we see that this man is seriously
frustrated. He complains that almost everything he says offends his wife, making it so that he
doesn't know how to talk to her.
“By which I'd bind myself to keep hands off” He's so frustrated that he's offending her all
the time that he suggests he'll even promise to (metaphorically speaking) "keep hands off," or
not talk about, subjects that she's "a-mind to name," which are basically the ones she doesn't
want him to talk about.
“To take your mother-loss of a first child/So inconsolably—in the face of love./You'd think
his memory might be satisfied— —“”. To top it off, he says that the memory of the child,
whom we now know was their first child, and male, should be satisfied. The idea here is that
the child's memory is only worth a finite amount of pain. And she's reached the quota.
“If you had any feelings, you that dug/With your own hand—how could you?—his little
grave;” For the man, who has lived in this house with a graveyard viewable from the
window for a long time, digging the grave for this child may have just followed life as he
knew it. But for the woman, his ability to dig his own child's grave was horrifying.
“I saw you from that very window there,/Making the gravel leap and leap in air,/Leap
up, like that, like that, and land so lightly/And roll back down the mound beside the hole.”
She's probably reminded of that traumatic day every time she walks downstairs .But what
really bothers her is the way her husband dug the grave. He was a bit too jolly about it, in
her humble opinion. All of the lightness and leaping (note the alliteration of the letter "l" in
these lines) makes these movements sound unburdened, even joyful, as an average day's
good work could be. When she says "like that, like that," we can even picture her gesturing,
as if to show her husband what he really looked like as he was gravedigging. Of course, the
more light and joyful the motion, the more offensive it is to her grief.
“I thought, Who is that man? I didn't know you.” The woman is so hurt by the
manner in which her husband dug their son's grave that she finds herself wondering if
she even knows the guy anymore.
“I shall laugh the worst laugh I ever laughed./I'm cursed. God, if I don't believe I'm
cursed.” After listening to his wife speak for eighteen lines, the man has to get his two
in. He chooses the route of cynical humor, saying that he will laugh the "worst" laugh
he's ever laughed. He thinks the things she has said are laughable.
"I can repeat the very words you were saying./'Three foggy mornings and one
rainy day/Will rot the best birch fence a man can build.’” While the man is
expressing his pain, the woman takes it literal.
“But the world's evil. I won't have grief so/If I can change it. Oh, I won't, I won’t!”.
On the same line that she claims the world is evil, she states that she "won't have
grief so." This thought is continued in the next line, which is an example of
enjambment (when a thought is split between two lines). The woman then qualifies her
statement by saying that if she can change it she won't have grief so. In other words,
if she could change grief to be a little different, a little less evil, she just might.
"There, you have said it all and you feel better./You won't go now. You're crying.
Close the door.” Without replying to anything specific that she's said, he just assumes
that, because she has said everything, she must feel better now. He assumes that she
won't leave, because she's crying, and so he tells her to close the door.
"Where do you mean to go? First tell me that./I'll follow and bring you back by
force. I will!—“. We don't know what happens to this couple, but are left hanging in
suspense and fear at the end of this poem. We have a feeling that whatever happens
next is not going to be good.
SYMBOLS
HOME: this poem does not merely take place in a home. It actually uses the rooms and the
structure of that home to make meaning. Now there's a nifty trick. In addition to relying on the
home setting, this piece also shows us what home is like for these two people. After the death of
her child, for the woman, this home has become more of a trap than a haven. And for her
husband, things don't seem much shinier.
COMMUNICATION: this couple has some major communication issues. Even worse, some of their
communication issues are about communication itself. We've got a man who doesn't know how to
speak without making his wife angry, and a woman who communicates mostly nonverbally, until
she explodes, volcano-style. At the same time that this couple seems to have bigger troubles than
communication, their inability to talk to each other is pretty dominant.
DEATH AND BURIAL: we don't know much about the actual kid who's dead and buried in this
couple's backyard, but we know a whole lot about that couple's reaction to that death and
burial. And as it turns out, their reactions aren't exactly compatible. In fact, the husband and
wife seem to be processing their son's death in opposite ways, which tells us that this poem is as
much about grief as it is about death.
THEMES
Language and communication
Power
Sadness
Gender
Death