DEAR ABBY: My girlfriend, “Jessica,” thinks I’ve cheated on her because I didn’t come home right away after being given the day off. My grandparents were away on vacation. When they go away, they want me to check on the house and bring in the mail and newspaper.
On this particular day, I decided to drive by, did what needed to be done and spent half the day there. I even took a nap in the recliner. Now Jessica insists that I cheated when I simply was hanging out at my grandparents’. To add to the situation, we have a daughter on the way, and Jessica doesn’t want me in the delivery room.
She’s blowing everything out of proportion. She was in a nine-year abusive relationship, and her ex cheated numerous times, so I’m not sure if her actions stem from her past relationship. I’m having a hard time understanding why she’s doing this with a baby on the way, when I’ve been nothing but faithful and good to her. -- ALMOST-EX IN MISSOURI
DEAR ALMOST-EX: It would have been considerate to have called your pregnant girlfriend from your grandparents’ house to let her know you would be returning later than expected. Not having done that was your mistake, nothing more.
Her over-the-top accusation of infidelity may have stemmed from a hormone imbalance caused by her pregnancy. It could also, as you stated, be the result of her disastrous nine-year romance with her abuser. Because she has trust issues, it’s important you consider couples counseling with her. As to wanting you absent when your child is born, she may have said it to retaliate for your imagined cheating, or to spare you the sight of her in pain.
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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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