Wedding planning often comes with pressures from our inner circle, and we’ve been told to block out those voices and instead create the day of our dreams. But your guests have traveled and invested in great lengths to be there for you, so it’s crucial to recognize the aspects that contribute most to their experience. This is where research from WeddingWire comes in handy: Findings reveal that guests pay most attention to the bride’s dress, food, open bar, the couple’s vows, and decor. What’s not on their minds? The length and language of the ceremony, programs, the garter toss, and toiletries in the bathroom.
Celebrity wedding planner Yifat Oren, founder of Oren Co., says food and music are the building blocks of a successful wedding night. The wedding bells and whistles you saw on Pinterest? They’re merely icing on the cake. Your guests won’t remember what your wedding looked like, but how it made them feel. Here, where to invest your energy to ensure your guests revel in the atmosphere of your big day.
Don’t Leave Anyone Hungry
The way to your guests’ hearts might just be through their stomachs. How many times have you been to a wedding and immediately looked for the nearest tray of canapés? Weddings and gluttony have almost become synonymous, and appropriately, 50 percent of guests surveyed cared about this element most. Think about investing a significant portion of your budget into a wide variety of appetizers, main dishes, and desserts, but don’t break the bank hiring a Michelin-starred caterer. “The food can be average. Not bad, but average. Don’t get me wrong, I love incredible food. But a fantastic band or DJ will undoubtedly make or break your party,” Oren says.
When you’re putting a lot of your budget towards food, drinks can take more of a backseat. For many cultures, religions, and limited budgets, dry weddings are the norm. That can be jarring to guests who were planning to get their buzz on, but don’t let it deter you from your plans. While an open bar is certainly the wedding topper on the cake, your guests who are there to support you on your big day will see past it (and be thankful for an energetic morning after!). If you’re flexible and still wish to cater to the crowd, opt either for a cash bar or a limited beer and wine selection during the main meal.
Dress Over Decor
Sixty percent of respondents say they focus on the bride’s dress with a particular interest in the grand entrance down the aisle. As for decor, martini- and love-goggles mean guests acknowledge color scheme, table settings, and flowers, but aren’t quite so fixated on them the entire night.
Look Out for Lonely Guests
Table seating comes with its own host of messy politics. But beyond dinner, guests impact each other’s experience of the wedding to a deeper degree than you probably realize. Guest flying solo are 15 percent less likely to enjoy the wedding than those who are coupled up (and to mitigate loneliness, 9 percent have brought a plus-one—gasp—even without permission).
That said, 40 percent of respondents from southern states said they look forward to weddings as an opportunity to meet new people. It’s by no means your responsibility to babysit your single guests, but let certain friendship dynamics dictate who you invite and where you seat them. If your budget allows for it, offer plus-ones, and if you need to be selective, adhere to these guidelines.
Don’t Worry About the Parting Gift
As Oren puts it: “When was the last time you received a parting gift at a wedding and thought, ‘This is fantastic. I can’t believe I got to go home with this?’ Exactly.” Instead of spending hundreds on monogrammed pens and scented candles, leave a lasting impression by warmly greeting each guest and sending them home with a hug, a smile, and a timely and genuine thank-you note.