Talk:Entre a Mi Mundo
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![]() | Entre a Mi Mundo (final version) received a peer review by Wikipedia editors, which on 7 July 2023 was archived. It may contain ideas you can use to improve this article. |
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Fair use rationale for Image:Entraamimundo.jpg
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BetacommandBot (talk) 05:08, 2 January 2008 (UTC)
GA Review
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Reviewing |
- This review is transcluded from Talk:Entre a Mi Mundo/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: Ebe123 (talk · contribs) 23:49, 29 January 2012 (UTC)
Rate | Attribute | Review Comment |
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1. Well-written: | ||
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1a. the prose is clear, concise, and understandable to an appropriately broad audience; spelling and grammar are correct. | |
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1b. it complies with the Manual of Style guidelines for lead sections, layout, words to watch, fiction, and list incorporation. | |
2. Verifiable with no original research: | ||
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2a. it contains a list of all references (sources of information), presented in accordance with the layout style guideline. | |
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2b. reliable sources are cited inline. All content that could reasonably be challenged, except for plot summaries and that which summarizes cited content elsewhere in the article, must be cited no later than the end of the paragraph (or line if the content is not in prose). | |
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2c. it contains no original research. | |
3. Broad in its coverage: | ||
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3a. it addresses the main aspects of the topic. | |
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3b. it stays focused on the topic without going into unnecessary detail (see summary style). | |
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4. Neutral: it represents viewpoints fairly and without editorial bias, giving due weight to each. | |
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5. Stable: it does not change significantly from day to day because of an ongoing edit war or content dispute. | |
6. Illustrated, if possible, by media such as images, video, or audio: | ||
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6a. media are tagged with their copyright statuses, and valid non-free use rationales are provided for non-free content. | |
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6b. media are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions. | |
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7. Overall assessment. |
This article needs wikifing, fixing bare urls, changing non-reliable ones (amazon for one), the sounds must be removed, as no FUR exists for the article. In short, the article is a long way from a GA.
If this seems incorrect, feel free for a community GAR.
~~Ebe123~~ → report on my contribs. 23:49, 29 January 2012 (UTC)
- I'm wiling to fix all the issues. Best, Jonayo! Selena 4 ever 23:53, 29 January 2012 (UTC)
GA Review
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Reviewing |
- This review is transcluded from Talk:Entre a Mi Mundo/GA2. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: Basilisk4u (talk · contribs) 02:25, 21 July 2012 (UTC)
Hi! I will review this article. Cheers! Basilisk4u (talk) 02:25, 21 July 2012 (UTC)
Notes
[edit]- Lead
- The title of the album should be written as Entre a Mi Mundo in all mentions of the name according to WP:CAPS.
- "Entre a mi mundo incorporates mostly Tejano music and rancheras." This paragraph seems a bit out of place where it is, consider adding it to the second paragraph, which talks about the album's musical style.
- "The album's production was postponed owing to Selena's relationship with guitarist Chris Pérez, which brought negative criticism from her father and manager Abraham Quintanilla Jr., who threatened to disband the group." --> "The album's production was postponed due to Selena's relationship with guitarist Chris Pérez, which garnered disapproval from from her father and manager Abraham Quintanilla Jr., who threatened to disband the group."
- "A further complication was Selena's Ven conmigo Tour..." --> The record's creation was further complicated by Selena's Ven Conmigo Tour..."
- Is there a source for "Como la flor" being her signature song? I couldn't seem to find the info in the body.
- "'La carcacha', which tells the story of a barrio teen romance that Selena never had" --> The "that Selena never had" part is not necessary for the lead.
- Production and development
- "At that time, Selena was also dealing with her relationship..." --> "At that time, Selena was also involved in a relationship..."
- "the antithesis of his "clean image" kids" --> "the antithesis of his children's "clean image""
- When did Selena's father begin to accept the relationship?
- "After Selena had eloped..." --> "After Selena's elopement"
- "Vela was also in charge of the music sequencer during pre-production of the album." Would "music sequencing" be better to use? Or is a music sequencer a piece of equipment?
- Singles
- Since this section discusses all of the songs, I think the title of the section should be changed to "Composition"
- "He had seen an old, broken down car and had told Joe Ojeda, the band's keyboardist, that he wanted to write a song about the old car." --> "He saw an old, broken down car and told Joe Ojeda, the band's keyboardist, that he wanted to write a song about the vehicle."
- "Quintanilla III had then asked Ojeda what "a broken down car" means in Spanish, and Ojeda replied "Carcacha"." --> "Ojeda then assisted Quintanilla III with the Spanish translation of the phrase "a broken down car", determining the correct phrase to be "Carcacha"."
- Was the girl who commented that Quintanilla III had a nice car also at the store? Or was it a different time?
- How does the car relate to the story of the barrio teen romance? Explain this further.
- "Quintanilla III had stated in an interview..." Remove "had"
- How did the poor plastic flower salespeople relate to the writing of "Como la Flor"?
- "Como la flor" helped Selena to dominate the Latin music charts and become immensely popular in Mexico, where Mexican-Americans are not liked among citizens, which was well received by critics." What was well-received by critics? It sounds like the fact that Mexican-Americans are not liked among Mexican citizens was well received.
- "Richard Torres of Newsday believed that Selena had an emotional vocal purity that helped make "¿Qué creias?" a international hit." "emotional vocal purity" should be in quotation marks.
- "Pérez also confessed to "doubling" his guitar solos on the song which he had only done for "Las cadenas"." What does it mean that he had only done it for "Las cadenas"? Had he never used this technique before?
- "Hector Saldanna of San Antonio Express-News wrote that "Vuelve A Mi" was a "hot little polka".[28] TerraMexico believed "Vueleve A Mi" was a "successful hit".[29]" --> "Hector Saldanna of San Antonio Express-News wrote that "Vuelve A Mi" was a "hot little polka", while TerraMexico described the song as a "successful hit"."
- Release
- "It eventually sold 300,000[38] or 385,000[39] copies in its first year" make sure you specifically say which source says what, like "According to Billboard..." for each
- Entre a Mi Mundo tour
- Looks good!
- Critical reception
- Remove this part from the Allmusic quote, as it does not have to do with critical discussion of the album: "She was named Top Female Entertainer and Female Vocalist of the Year for three years straight at the Tejano Music Awards. Tracks include "Si la quieres," "Yo te sigo queriendo," and "Las cadenas""
On hold
[edit]I have placed the review on hold in order for these concerns to be addressed. Cheers! Basilisk4u (talk) 03:50, 26 July 2012 (UTC)
Done Best, Jonatalk to me 04:31, 26 July 2012 (UTC)
- Wow! Thanks for your fast response. Passing the article :) Basilisk4u (talk) 05:18, 26 July 2012 (UTC)
Copy editing: 6/18/17 UTC
[edit]Hi! I am currently copy editing this article for the GOCE June Blitz. I will keep a task list of what I am planning to do/have done to this article on this page. If anyone has any questions, suggestions, or comments relating to my copy editing, please let me know. Also, please feel free to add tasks to the task list. Thanks! Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 08:09, 18 June 2017 (UTC)
Discussion (CE 6/18/17)
[edit]This section is for questions, suggestions, or comments relating to my copy editing. Notice added by Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) at 08:09, 18 June 2017 (UTC).
Tag resolving (CE 6/18/17)
[edit]- Thanks for your copyedits to the article. As I skimmed through the article I found several "clarify" tags that did not explain what you did not get while reading the text you highlighted. I am going to add those below here and maybe you can help me understand what you did not get or explain what needs to be clarified. – jona ✉ 20:15, 18 June 2017 (UTC)
- a habit that Pérez found to be surprising giving the amount of importance that the group put on it.
- Does this mean that Pérez was surprised at how much importance the group put on sequencing the music? This is the only reasonable conclusion I can pull out of this sentence, but it seems like there could be others. Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 00:24, 20 June 2017 (UTC)
- The first one, I am assuming that with Shelly Lares they did not put that much of an importance on their production sequence than with Selena and her band, so he was flabbergasted. – jona ✉ 12:53, 20 June 2017 (UTC)
- I find this explanation very confusing. Can you rephrase it? Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 00:41, 22 June 2017 (UTC)
- Perez found it surprising that the new group (Los Dinos) put so much importance on the music sequencing during the production of this album. – jona ✉ 01:25, 22 June 2017 (UTC)
- Thanks for the explanation! I will change the sentence accordingly. Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 01:34, 22 June 2017 (UTC)
Implemented by Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋)
- her first songwriting credit since "My Love" (1989)
- What is a "songwriting credit"? Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 00:24, 20 June 2017 (UTC)
- Where her name appears as a songwriter or co-writer of a song on the album's liner notes. – jona ✉ 12:53, 20 June 2017 (UTC)
- Thanks for the response! Is there some way that this can be expressed in the article, less confusingly than it is right now? Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 00:41, 22 June 2017 (UTC)
- It was the first song she wrote since "My Love" in 1989. – jona ✉ 01:25, 22 June 2017 (UTC)
- Thanks for the explanation! I will change the sentence accordingly. Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 01:34, 22 June 2017 (UTC)
Implemented by Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋)
- "their" - you asked to explain who, but the text does say the narrator "compares their love to a flower"
- The real question I want to know is if the love that the narrator is talking about is
- her relationship with her ex-lover, or
- her ex-lover's relationship with his new lover.
- Does the text specify one way or the other? Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 00:24, 20 June 2017 (UTC)
- The song describes a woman who sees her former lover with another woman, she (the woman former lover) compares their (former lovers) love to a flower that has withered and died. – jona ✉ 12:53, 20 June 2017 (UTC)
- Thanks for the response! This is very clear. I will change the text to express this. Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 00:41, 22 June 2017 (UTC)
Implemented by Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋)
- "believing California was then fixated with the singer." - this is what's written in the book, I believe the author meant that the crowd was captivated by the singer's performance and wrote the text as if the crowd represented California.
- In that case, the text should probably be removed, as it is then redundant. Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 00:24, 20 June 2017 (UTC)
Implemented by Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋)
- I'm not sure what you mean by "non sequitur" for the text that states the singer's Spanish was far from fluent?
- The non sequitur here is as follows (paraphrased): Tejanos were looked down on, and the singer's Spanish was far from fluent. Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 00:24, 20 June 2017 (UTC)
- I've never heard of that so I'm not sure what you are saying. – jona ✉ 12:53, 20 June 2017 (UTC)
- I actually just realized that there is no non sequitur in the text, as both sentences are related to the sentence before them, so I will remove the tag. Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 00:41, 22 June 2017 (UTC)
Implemented by Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋)
- "backbonning" - is exactly quoted from Paredez' text
- The purpose of Template:Sic is to say that the text, while ungrammatical, is an exact quote. Since it is an exact quote, then one of two things should happen:
- If the slip is textually important, the "?" parameter should be removed from the template, making it appear as follows: [sic]
- If the slip is not textually important, the "sic" template should be removed and the typo should be corrected.
- @AJona1992: Please let me know if the slip is textually important or not. Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) Message written at 00:24, 20 June 2017 (UTC); ping added at 00:41, 22 June 2017 (UTC)
Fixed – jona ✉ 13:02, 22 June 2017 (UTC)
- How does one contribute as an Amazon.com music editorial? - Joey Guerra is a music journalist for the Houston Chronicle who did a promotional editorial piece for Amazon.com's market page for the album.
- In that case, the text "Contributing as an Amazon.com music editorial, Joey Guerra" should be changed to "Joey Guerra, doing a promotional editorial piece for Amazon.com,". Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 00:24, 20 June 2017 (UTC)
Implemented by Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋)
- "helped challenged"
- Does this mean "helped challenge", "helped and challenged", or something else? Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 00:24, 20 June 2017 (UTC)
- The first one. – jona ✉ 12:53, 20 June 2017 (UTC)
- Thanks for the answer! I will change the article accordingly.
Implemented by Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋)
- What does it mean to "continue [ones] streak" at something? - she previously won the award.
- Thanks for the update! Which award? Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 00:24, 20 June 2017 (UTC)
- The awards that are linked in that same sentence. – jona ✉ 12:53, 20 June 2017 (UTC)
- So Selena won both awards previously, and then won them again? Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 00:41, 22 June 2017 (UTC)
- Yes, it is not uncommon for performers to win awards consecutively year after year. – jona ✉ 01:25, 22 June 2017 (UTC)
- Thanks for the clarification! I will change the sentence accordingly. Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 01:34, 22 June 2017 (UTC)
Implemented by Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋)
- Shouldn't this be "the two-week period"? - I'm not even sure if Billboard reported a two-week sales period for the chart itself, all I know that it was bi-weekly during this time period.
- In that case, I suppose that the "clarify" tag can then be removed. Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 00:24, 20 June 2017 (UTC)
Implemented by Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋)
- EMI Latin then considered Selena y Los Dinos a commercial group. - According to Chris Perez (in his book), after the album debuted on the Top Latin Albums chart, the company considered the group a "commercial group".
- What is a "commercial group"? Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 00:24, 20 June 2017 (UTC)
- The author does not give specifics of what he means of what a commercial group is. – jona ✉ 12:53, 20 June 2017 (UTC)
- Since a "commercial group" does not seem to mean anything (see this and this), I will simply remove the text talking about "commercial group" from the article. Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 00:41, 22 June 2017 (UTC)
Implemented by Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋)
- "her back catalogue." - her previous albums
- In that case, "her back catalogue" should be changed to "her previous albums". Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 00:24, 20 June 2017 (UTC)
Implemented by Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋)
- In music terminology, it is appropriate to say "back catalogue" when an album is older than 18 months and saying "her previous albums" makes the prose weak since they both actually mean the same thing. – jona ✉ 12:53, 20 June 2017 (UTC)
- Thanks for the clarification! I will revert the text, and provide a link to Wiktionary as a footnote for those who do not know what a back catalogue is. Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 00:41, 22 June 2017 (UTC)
Implemented by Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋), reverting previous implementation in this thread
- What's this for? - The RIAA is the official issuer in music certifications in the United States, sales figures are often higher (by reporters and music companies who often inflate and over exaggerate) than what is certified by the RIAA who certifies based on shipments not sales in the country.
- In the phrase "As of December 2002, the album had been certified six-times platinum (Latin)", I'm not quite sure why the phrase "(Latin)" is there. Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 00:24, 20 June 2017 (UTC)
- The album was certified 6x platinum (Latin) = 600,000 units and not the standard 6x platinum = 6,000,000 units. There's a difference between what the RIAA certifies for a Latin album than a standard album (non-Latin). – jona ✉ 12:53, 20 June 2017 (UTC)
- I don't see a RIAA certification for Latin music on the RIAA certification page. Can you direct me to a source that specifies that in Latin music, platinum = 100,000 units? Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 00:41, 22 June 2017 (UTC)
-
- Thanks for the link! I will change the sentence so that it will use the link. Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 01:34, 22 June 2017 (UTC)
- I can't actually figure out how to change the sentence properly. AJona1992, can you do so for me, or give me some advice on how do so? Thanks! Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 01:47, 22 June 2017 (UTC)
Done – jona ✉ 13:02, 22 June 2017 (UTC)
Tag resolving 2 (CE 6/18/17)
[edit]- Were Vela and Astudillo involved in overseeing production and track composing, or just track composing? - no Selena's brother A.B. Quintanilla oversaw production of the album.
Implemented by Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋)
- Which group was trying to feed their families: the street vendors, or the dance club patrons? I would assume the street vendors, but the usage of the word "who" implies the dance club patrons. - The street vendors were trying to feed their families.
Implemented by Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋)
- Their - Full Force's recording studio.
Implemented by Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋)
- More than what? - emotion and soul
- @AJona1992: What I meant to be asking was: It says that she added "more emotion and soul" into her music. What I'm wondering is: What is this compared to? Where she did not have as much "emotion and soul" in her music? Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 04:30, 8 July 2017 (UTC)
- The source does not specify at which point from when she improved on, my guess is from her previous studio album but that's just my opinion it could have been a collective of her two previous studio recordings but not sure. – jona ✉ 15:23, 8 July 2017 (UTC)
- Since when? - source does not specify, but he has wrote songs since the band began recording albums and producing since the late 1980s. – jona ✉ 14:03, 7 July 2017 (UTC)
@AJona1992: For the two currently unresolved items, I'm not quite sure what to do with them. On one hand, there is nothing that can be done to make them less ambiguous while remaining true to the sources; on the other hand, keeping them in this state is ambiguous, making it somewhat confusing due to its ambiguity. I can't figure out a solution to this problem. If you can help me find a solution, that would help tremendously! Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 22:18, 8 July 2017 (UTC)
Phrase redundancy (CE 6/18/17)
[edit]@AJona1992: I noticed that, in the lede, the word "diverse" is used twice (once as "diversity", in the following sentence part, occuring in the lede (emphasis added):
- The group members' diverse backgrounds aided in the diversity of the genres explored on Entre a Mi Mundo
The re-use of the word "diverse" twice in the same area appears again in the Composition section, in the following paragraph (emphasis and ellipses added):
- The band members came from diverse backgrounds, which added to the album's influence [...]. The album contained a diverse musical style
Can you help me figure out a way to change one of these occurences of the word "diverse" in each of these cases to another word without losing the meaning in either case? Thanks! Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) 04:11, 23 June 2017 (UTC)
- @Noah Kastin: To be honest, I am not too sure what could be replaced to make the sentence remain true. – jona ✉ 14:05, 7 July 2017 (UTC)
Task list (CE 6/18/17)
[edit]This section is for marking tasks needing to be done concerning this article. Unless stated otherwise, tasks are to be done by me, Noah Kastin. Notice added by Noah Kastin (talk) (🖋) at 08:09, 18 June 2017 (UTC).
Done First copy edit of article.
Done Tagging of parts of the article that I cannot clean up myself.
Done Second copy edit of article.
Done Resolving of tags added before the final copy edit by AJona1992 and me.
Done Final copy edit and related tagging.
In progress Resolving of tags added during the final copy edit by AJona1992 and me.
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