Helpful Hints from Sterk Family Law Group: Success Will Look Different for All

Success Will Look Different for All - A Client Testimonial from Sterk Family Law Group. P.C. 

The team at Sterk Family Law Group, P.C. receives many letters from clients. With the permission of a previous client, the following letter is being publicly shared, as words of encouragement.       

You represented me in my divorce years ago. I recently paid my last child support payment and felt the need to reach out to you in order to offer a look on the other side so it might help others.

Like most, my divorce represented the worst part of my life and was something I wasn’t sure I would get through. I remember our initial meeting. It was sobering and snapped me out of the numbness I was feeling. There were many steps in the process I had to be dragged thru. The financial discovery was something I wanted no part of. It represented the beginning of something I didn’t want but had no choice. I knew it would reveal things I didn’t want to know but needed to know. As much as I dreaded the call from your office constantly prodding and pulling me, it’s what I needed.

You and your staff were the voice of reason that I needed at that time. I had no clue what I was doing or how to get through it. You provided a light at the end of the tunnel to turn my life around. I know of many that have gotten divorced. Most of what I hear are more horrific than mine. Your concern was getting it done quickly and fairly in order to move forward. Although most of it wasn’t “quick”, that was beyond my control. I remember at one point having a conversation with you and I said I’ve had enough. You gave me my options and after I iterated my intention of ending it, you listened and heard me. Within two weeks it was over. By the grace of God, I never went back to court.

There are three things I tell people that were the keys to putting my life back together:

1. Get close to God. Even if you think you are close, you’re not. Get closer. I ended up volunteering at my church leading high school ministry. I had no clue what I was doing, but it gave me a chance to not think about myself for a little while. Those kids helped me more than I helped them.

2. Therapy. I went for three years straight and off and on for the past 10 years. There’s never too much therapy.

3. I stayed single for a long time. The rule of thumb was no dating 1 year for every 5 years I was married.

Most of what I did during and after my divorce was not conventional and I wouldn’t recommend it for the squeamish, but it led to where I am today. I just celebrated my X-year wedding anniversary. I feel one of the reasons I went through this is to help others, including you and your staff. The people that walk through your doors are broken. Some my not put themselves back together. You are like triage doctors. Your patients have no clue what is happening. Be gentle. Listen and hear what they are saying. Most will not like anything you have to say. The patient doesn’t have a clue. Hopefully they listen. The sooner the procedure has been completed, the sooner the healing can begin.

For your clients, a question I constantly asked myself was, “What is my peace worth?” Things have no value. I was practically broke by the time it was all over. I didn’t care. I refused to allow the circumstances to define me. My divorce was an opportunity to start over and do better. Be better. Success will look different for all. It doesn’t always look like mine. I treasure my life and my wife.

I hope somehow maybe it helps remind you of what you do and why you do it. Use my story to a client who may need to hear it or to a new employee who needs to understand what they are about to enter into.

Thank you for all you did for me. Be blessed. 

If you have questions or concerns related to divorce law, family law or estate planning, reach out to SterkFamilyLaw.com. 

[This article is a legal advertisement from Sterk Family Law Group. It does not constitute legal advice and should not be construed as such. This article is for informational and educational purposes only.]