Heraldic Boast for Hillarius Clock Werk's Pelican

Oye oye oye!

Your Majesties, Your Highnesses, Gathered People of the East!

Bend your ear, for I herald the arrival of a man who needs no introduction,
other than, of course, this introduction,
...which I am giving now.

Behold! His Excellency, Baron Cristoff Gockerhan von Loch, also known as Christoff the Clockwork, also known as Hilarious Clockwork, also just known as Clock!
A man so funny, he had to register Hilarious as his name to get you to call him that!

Feast your eyes upon a man who is such a snack, he's the Feast of the East!
Hear as I toot the horn of a man who toots regularly and often.
Your Majesties, there's a lot of tooting.

A man whose dedication to the children of this Kingdom is so incredible, he's a Major Chancellor Minor.
And he's a thrown weapons marshal!
And he's done thrown weapons for children!
He's a Major Minor Thrown Weapons Chancellor Minor Marshal!

A man so dedicated to our monarchs, he served as Royal Chamberlain and as a Royal Guard for years!
He's traveled the length and breadth of the Kingdom transporting supplies and people.
He's always on the move!
I have been assured repeatedly that he is indeed at the end of this procession to receive his just accolades,
and not putting the final touches on the court backdrop and props.

A truly great and wonderful being.
A powerful presence in all of our lives.
A laugh when we face sadness.
A helping hand when we need another.
A true friend, a constant companion.

Your Majesties, it is my honor to present to you, Baron Hilarious Clockwork.