Aunts Quotes

“Swearing relieves the feelings - that is what swearing does. I explained this to my aunt on one occasion, but it didn't answer with her. She said I had no business to have such feelings.”
― Jerome K. Jerome, Idle Thoughts of an Idle Fellow

“That aunt of mine; boy, she used to wear make-up all week long so terrible thick that - well, she started about Wednesday layering it on, and she never washed, and every day she slapped down a new layer. Until Sunday. Then on Sunday she kind of peeled it off to go to church. *** Boy, she was a case; I used to hope she'd skip a Sunday - sleep through to Monday or something - because I knew two weeks' worth of make-up and she'd set up like a statue.”
― Ken Kesey, Sometimes a Great Notion

“The only reason that some people aren’t ashamed of their parents and/or siblings is because they know that we know that they did not choose them.”
― Mokokoma Mokhonoana

“The best aunts aren't substitute parents, they're co-conspirators.”
― Daryl Gregory, Harrison Squared

“How sharper than a serpent's tooth, I remember Jeeves saying once, it is to have a thankless child, and it isn't a dashed sight better having a thankless aunt.”
― P.G. Wodehouse, Aunts Aren't Gentlemen

“Aunts offer kids an opportunity to try out ideas that don't chime with their parents and they also demonstrate that people can get on, love each other and live together without necessarily being carbon copies.”
― Sara Sheridan

“Always wise aunts come in many guises. There are maiden aunts, dowager aunts, and that delightful creature, the eccentric aunt. I fear I fall into the latter category.”
― Sara Sheridan

“Jane, in fact, mothered these girls, and her fiction reveals her belief that motherhood could be a social, not a biological function.4 Blood mothers may be ridiculous or ill-advised, like Mrs Bennet or Mrs Dashwood, but mothers in the form of mentors are often wise, generous, caring. Mrs Gardiner, her aunt, gives Lizzy Bennet better advice than Mrs Bennet does, while Emma Woodhouse has a fine surrogate in the shape of Mrs Weston. In this sense, Fanny and Anna were Jane’s own children.”
― Lucy Worsley, Jane Austen at Home

“You’re telling me you’re not worried about your daughter hanging around with six boys with dubious reputations? And dating one of them who looks at your daughter with…that look?”

My brow creased. “What look?”

“Oh, please,” Aunt M scoffed. “That look. And not to mention that smile. Hungry,” she growled the word, “and hot enough to make a nun’s panties spontaneously combust.”
― A. Kirk, Drop Dead Demons

“Edie?” I put the can opener down. “Can I ask you a personal question?”
“I’m your aunt! Shoot.” She kept chopping methodically.
“Why aren’t you married?”
“Well, why aren’t you married?” Her eyes narrowed. “Because I’m 15!” I retorted.
“Yeah, and I’m 42. And a half.”
― Jessica Glasner, Voyage of the Sandpiper

“I hope they produce twenty-seven bouncing babies for Uncle Bobby to spoil rotten. Then I'll hand them back when they need changing and bathing and whatnot.”
― Jennifer Ashley, The Price of Lemon Cake: A Below Stairs Mysteries Novella

“Aunts cook like

there's no tomorrow
& they're right.”
― Kevin Young