Buffy The Vampire Slayer Quotes

“Bottom line is, even if you see 'em coming, you're not ready for the big moments. No one asks for their life to change, not really. But it does. So what are we, helpless? Puppets? No. The big moments are gonna come. You can't help that. It's what you do afterwards that counts. That's when you find out who you are.”
― Joss Whedon

“I've got a theory, it could be bunnies...

I've got a theor-

Bunnies aren't just cute like everybody supposes
They've got them hoppy legs and twitchy little noses.
And what's with all the carrots-?
What do they need such good eyesight for anyway?
Bunnies, bunnies it must be bunnies!

...or maybe midgets...”
― Joss Whedon Buffy the Vampire Slayer

“Wherever I was, I was happy. At peace. I knew that everyone I cared about was all right. I knew it. Time didn't mean anything, nothing had form but I was still me, you know? And I was warm and I was loved and I was finished. Complete. I don't understand about theology or dimensions, or any of it, really but I think I was in heaven. And now I'm not. I was torn out of there. Pulled out by my friends. Everything here is hard, and bright, and violent. Everything I feel, everything I touch this is hell. Just getting through the next moment, and the one after that knowing what I've lost...”
― Joss Whedon

“He's like Super Librarian, y'know? Everyone forgets, Willow, that knowledge is the ultimate weapon.”
― Joss Whedon

“The thing about changing the world... Once you do it, the world's all different.”
― Joss Whedon, Buffy the Vampire Slayer: The Long Way Home

“If the apocalypse comes...beep me!”
― Joss Whedon

“Seven years, Dawn. Working with the Slayer. Seeing my friends get more and more powerful... a witch. A demon. Hell, I could fit Oz in my shaving kit, but come a full moon, he had a wolfy mojo not to be messed with. Powerful, all of them. And I'm the guy who fixes the windows.

They'll never know how tough it is, Dawnie, to be the one who isn't Chosen, to live so near the spotlight and never step in it. But I know. I see more than anybody realizes because nobody's watching me.

I saw you last night, and I see you working here today. You're not special; you're extraordinary.”
― Joss Whedon

“There's an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer that I've been thinking about a lot while writing this essay. In it, Buffy sacrifices her own life to save her sister, and right before she does, she tells her sister that the hardest thing to do in the world is to live - ironic words coming from someone about to kill herself for the greater good. As I'm writing this, I just keep thinking that Katniss never gets to sacrifice herself. She doesn't get the heroic death. She survives - and that leaves her doing the hardest thing in the world: living in it once so many of the ones she loves are gone.”
― Jennifer Lynn Barnes, The Girl Who Was on Fire: Your Favorite Authors on Suzanne Collins' Hunger Games Trilogy

“Buffy Summers: (to Spike) "I could NEVER be your girl!”
― Buffy the Vampire Slayer writers

“Tonight sucks. And look at me. Look at - look at stupid Buffy. Too dumb for college, and-and-and freak Buffy, too strong for construction work. And-and my job at the magic shop? I was bored to tears even before the hour that wouldn't end. And the only person that I can even stand to be around is a... neutered vampire who cheats at kitten poker.”
― Joss Whedon

“If every vampire who said he was at The Crucifixion, was actually there, it would have been like Woodstock . . .”
― Joss Whedon

“My people - before I was changed - they exchanged this as a sign of devotion. It's a Claddagh ring. The hands represent friendship; the crown represents loyalty... and the heart... Well, you know... Wear it with the heart pointing towards you. It means you belong to somebody. Like this.”
― Joss Whedon

“There was this other apocalypse this one time. And, well, I took off. But this time, I don't... I don't know."

"Well, what's different?"

"Well, I guess I was kinda new to being around humans before. And now I've seen a lot more, gotten to know people, seen what they're capable of and I guess I just realize how amazingly... screwed up they all are. I mean, really, really screwed up in a monumental fashion."

"Oh."

"And they have no purpose that unites them, so they just drift around, blundering through life until they die. Which they-they know is coming, yet every single one of them is surprised when it happens to them. They're incapable of thinking about what they want beyond the moment. They kill each other, which is clearly insane, and yet, here's the thing. When it's something that really matters, they fight. I mean, they're lame morons for fighting. But they do. They never... They never quit. And so I guess I will keep fighting, too.”
― Joss Whedon

“Vampire Willow Rosenberg: "In my world, we have people in chains, and we can ride them like ponies.”
― Buffy the Vampire Slayer writers

“Six a.m.!" Xander cried. "I know that's a number on my clock, but I've never actually been awake to personally witness it!”
― Alice Henderson, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Vol. 1

“In my generation, there was a single girl given the strength and skill to fight the spread of darkness...but in your generation, there are nearly two thousand with the powers of the slayer, and not all of them have chosen to use their newfound abilities conscientiously.”
― Joss Whedon, Buffy the Vampire Slayer: No Future for You

“Do you love me?
What?
Do you?
I love you. I don't know if I trust you.
Maybe you shouldn't do either.
Maybe I'm the one who should decide!”
― Joss Whedon

“What is it with you and the Wizard of Oz references? Zombies and werewolves and vamps, oh my. Zombies and werewolves and...”
― Christopher Golden, Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Halloween Rain

“I keep thinking they’re gonna call me. I keep thinking they’re gonna crunch the numbers and think, oh, we can make money with this! And they don’t.”
― Joss Whedon

“Xander Harris: "Just when you think you know a guy he robs a mass grave and takes off.”
― Diana G. Gallagher, Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Obsidian Fate

“We're all leaving now", Blue Eyes whispered to her. "Together. Out the front door. Scream, and we'll kill you here and now.
"Or later", Willow suggested nervously. "Later would be a big improvement on that idea. We could meet back here in, say, an hour, and you can exhibit your homicidal tendencies then, okay? That would be way better for us.”
― Christopher Golden, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Vol. 2

“Boys", Buffy hissed through clenched teeth, "being quiet is an important part of sneaking."
"Oh, sorry", Xander said, reducing his voice to a whisper.
"Besides, ritual sacrifice is a religious rite", Giles went on quietly. "They wouldn't sacrifice just anyone at random. It's far more likely they'd suspect you of being a Roman spy scouting for the invasion and just outright kill you".
"Oh great! Great! Way to be encouraging Giles. And I suppose you'll just watch that happen, in your Watchery way.”
― Alice Henderson, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Vol. 1

“Xander Harris: Hair. Red. Red is good. Fire engines are red. Porsche's are red.”
― Christopher Golden, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Vol. 2

“...she yanked open her shoulder bag and pulled out a stake. Boy Scouts and vampire slayers should always be prepared.”
― Christopher Golden, Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Halloween Rain

“She was the Slayer. Normal teen angst didn't stack up to fangs at your throat.”
― Christopher Golden, Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Halloween Rain

“And that noise! It was enough to make that happy mailman on Mr. Rogers go postal!”
― Christopher Golden, Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Halloween Rain; Bad Bargain; Afterimage v. 2

“Don't you know me by now, Angel? I never do what I'm meant for.”
― Brad Meltzer, Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Twilight

“Spike: "Thanks, but I make it a point to stay away from literature lovers. The reality never matches the fantasy.”
― Joss Whedon, Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Season 10, Volume 2

“F#*% evolution.”
― Brad Meltzer, Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Twilight

“To read makes our speaking English good.”
― Xander Harris