DANNY MURPHY ON THE PAIN OF MISSING A TOURNAMENT: David Beckham put an arm round me when my World Cup dream died... I couldn't hold back the tears
- I was never a player constantly obsessed with making the England squad
- David Beckham was among those consoling me when my World Cup dream died
- England's Euro 2004 team was incredible on paper but they didn't win. Can this crop do it this summer? Listen to the It's All Kicking Off podcast
For some players, making the England squad can become an obsession. It will be on their minds constantly. I was never one of them.
That is because players in England squads are generally at different levels. Certain stars, like Harry Kane or Jude Bellingham, know that as long as they are fit they will be going to the European Championship this summer.
Then there are those who aren’t on the top tier but are consistent and if they are playing steadily will probably be on the plane. Harry Maguire, for example.
Finally, you have the players on the periphery. Ones who aren’t always picked but might be a part of the conversation if there are injuries or show great form at the right time.
That was me. I’d had a taste of the England squad ahead of the World Cup in 2002 but I knew I wasn’t going to be a regular starter.
![I was never one of those players who was constantly obsessed with making the England squad](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2024/03/23/22/82817905-13231545-I_was_never_one_of_those_players_who_was_constantly_obsessed_wit-m-12_1711232431675.jpg)
I was never one of those players who was constantly obsessed with making the England squad
![I broke my toe ahead of the 2002 World Cup, and David Beckham consoled me afterwards](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2024/03/23/21/82818033-13231545-image-a-26_1711229301354.jpg)
I broke my toe ahead of the 2002 World Cup, and David Beckham consoled me afterwards
I always thought, maybe wrongly, that I wasn’t quite at the level of some of the other players around the squad. I believed in myself but I never felt entitled to be there.
So it was never an obsession. England was always special but not something I banked on. I was focused on playing for Liverpool and staying in the team. Anything else was a bonus.
I was at home when Sven Goran Eriksson phoned. He told me I was on standby for the World Cup.
Any disappointment I felt was overridden by knowing that I was even in Sven’s mind. Two years earlier I’d not been in the England picture at all and I’d worked really hard to get there.
And then I got another phone call.
Steven Gerrard, one of my best mates in football, had dropped out with injury. It was a bittersweet moment for me. I was gutted for Stevie but buzzing to go to a World Cup.
I was so excited. We went off to Dubai for a pre-tournament trip. I was ecstatic.
There are players in the squad now that will be in the same boat. Cole Palmer, Anthony Gordon and Kobbie Mainoo will be thrilled just to be called up and know they have the chance to make an impression right before a huge tournament.
If Mainoo puts in a performance like he has been doing for Manchester United, suddenly there’s even more clamour there for Gareth Southgate, who might just think it’s a risk. The same goes for Gordon, who’s been superb for Newcastle this season.
Cameos alone will not do it but if Palmer, say, does something brilliant against high-quality opposition and Gareth knows how versatile he is, then whether it is him or Jarrod Bowen for the Euros suddenly becomes a question to answer.
![Kobbie Mainoo and Cole Palmer will hope strong performances will get them to the Euros](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2024/03/23/21/82818441-13231545-image-a-29_1711230264012.jpg)
Kobbie Mainoo and Cole Palmer will hope strong performances will get them to the Euros
![Similarly, Ivan Toney will be one of those eyeing up the chance to be Harry Kane's back-up](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2024/03/23/21/82818507-13231545-image-a-30_1711230325174.jpg)
Similarly, Ivan Toney will be one of those eyeing up the chance to be Harry Kane's back-up
Ivan Toney and Ollie Watkins will feel this is their chance to plant a flag to be Kane’s back-up.
After Dubai, we played a few warm-up games and I started the final one against South Korea in Seogwipo. I played OK and with the injuries we had I thought I, likewise, had given myself a chance.
Then I broke my toe. It was the last minute of our training session the next day. I went up for a header and landed on my foot.
I knew it was serious. I tried to convince myself I would be fine but I couldn’t put any weight on it.
I had to wait another two days for the results. That was as tough as it gets — phoning home and telling your loved ones what had happened.
It was the worst moment of my career. World Cups only come around every four years. I believed in myself but I knew I wasn’t David Beckham or Steven Gerrard.
When I got back to the hotel the first person I saw was Becks. He came over to me. ‘I’m gutted for you,’ he said and he put his hand on my shoulder and gave it a little squeeze as if to say: ‘Hey, you’re going to be OK’.
I filled up. I had to take myself away and have a moment alone. The empathy he had with my situation, having broken his metatarsal himself only a month earlier, was nice and it was kind. If anything, though, it made it worse.
I had never had any serious injuries and I did not have the experience of being deprived of huge moments because I was injured.
The irony of it all was that Trevor Sinclair, who came in for me, ended up starting all but the first game.
![It was ironic that my replacement Trevor Sinclair started all but the first game at the World Cup](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2024/03/23/21/82818537-13231545-image-m-32_1711230410572.jpg)
It was ironic that my replacement Trevor Sinclair started all but the first game at the World Cup
![It was hard to watch the World Cup from afar, as I still wanted England to win the tournament](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2024/03/23/21/82769531-13231545-Emile_Heskey_and_Danny_Mills_played_in_the_game_and_debated_whet-m-28_1711229825275.jpg)
It was hard to watch the World Cup from afar, as I still wanted England to win the tournament
By that time I’d got home and flown straight to Portugal with mates. I watched the games, but reluctantly. I considered giving them a miss but all the lads wanted to so we watched them in a local bar.
It was hard. I still wanted England to win.
When I look back now, I try to give it context. I played for 20 years and didn’t have an operation, I never had to go through the dark times of rehab from a long-term injury.
I just focus on the good because there was lots of it — even if I did miss out on a World Cup.